Amor Prohibido
by ecaniaga
Summary: Set straight after Bella's change. Jasper helps Bella adjust to newborn life and feelings begin to develop. But what happens to the future, when the past collides with the present in a violent clash? Rated M for later chapters JasperxBella *Now Complete*
1. Birth

**This will be a JasperxBella fanfic, this is my first story on this account. I had another one, but it just cancelled itself haha! So if you don't like the pairings you don't have to read it. It starts exactly after the change, I thought I would leave all that pain for Stephenie Meyer to write! Please review if you think I should continue, or I may start another story. Constructive criticism greatly welcomed! Other chapters will be longer! M is for later chapters too!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Twilight related!**

Chapter 1: Birth

(Bella POV)

Three days… It seemed so odd, time had held no meaning just moments ago. Minutes, hours, days- time seemed to bleed together. I was sure that it was over now. My heart was no longer beating, and everything seemed so much more real.

I reluctantly pulled myself out of my pain induced coma to realize that two strong arms were holding my once fragile body. But I was no longer fragile was I? I was cold and hard as stone. It was a small price to pay if it meant an eternity with my other half. My Edward. Edward?

"Bella, love? It's over, you can open your eyes now."

Voice as sweet as honey. Yet even sweeter now that my full vampiric hearing could appreciate it. That was my Edward. And yet was it? Would he still love me now that my warmth and my blush was gone?

"Bella open your eyes! You've got to see how hot you are!" I heard a dull thud, stone on stone, followed by "Well what!? She is!"

Emmett. My lovable big brother! But then I had two brothers now! And two sisters! I had my family! Of course they would object that they were always my family. But now it was official! I could hug them and fight with them without breaking!

I could hear perfectly my entire family's unnecessary breathing. I supposed they were getting impatient with me. Lying here like a lump, albeit, recovering from a fairly traumatic experience, but still. I should probably put them out of their suspense.

I pried one eye open to take in my new surroundings and my god were they new! Everything was magnified! It was like seeing everything through the most magnificent pair of glasses in the world! Everything sparkled, I would sparkle! And my new family. They were even more beautiful than my foolish human eyes had allowed me to see. Each one a perfect sculpture, carved from diamond ice! I could only think of one thing to say.

"Holy crap!"

Seven simultaneous voices of laughter, each harmonizing and complimenting each other perfectly.

"My sweet out spoken Bella!" And with that, I was swept into two strong arms and cradled like a baby in the arms of Edward. But I wasn't a baby now was I?! I hugged him back with all the force I could muster.

"OW! Bella! Remember?! New born! you're way stronger when you first come out!"

"Haha, sorry darling, just testing my strength!"

"BELLA!" Alice swept me up and jumped with me on the spot- I felt like I was flying! "Oh my god! Look at what you've done to your clothes!! They are so tattered from you trying to rip your skin off! We are **so** going to have to take you shopping!"

It was at that point that I realized Alice was right. I looked down at my body and realized I was standing in a tattered black bra and a ripped pair of panties. I should have felt more embarrassed, but oddly, all I could feel was an over powering amount of lust. I looked up to find Jasper staring most unashamedly at my body. Well I **must** be attractive! I thought to myself laughing! Rosalie smacked Emmett over the head when she realized he was staring too.

"Well Bella! I think it's about time you truly saw yourself don't you?" Rosalie's perfectly pitched voice called out.

"First! I think I should be properly introduced to my new family!" and with that I ran at Esme and held her in a gut wrenching hug. She dry sobbed into my hair.

"I'm so happy for you! You are now truly my daughter!"

"Thank you… mum!" She smiled so large that it broke my heart, and I grabbed her again into a loving hug.

"Dad!" I called as I ran over to Carlisle and he picked me up in his arms as if I were four year old and cradled me against him. "Welcome to the family, my daughter!" He spoke into my ear. I rushed over to Rosalie, not really expecting a hug, but what she did surprised me most of all. She brought her hand to my face and gingerly pushed a strand of hair behind my ear. "I am truly proud to call you my sister!" Then she kissed me on both my cheeks.

Alice just grabbed my hands and jumped with me on the spot for a few minutes. She didn't have to say anything, I knew how happy she was for me to be here!

"Bella babe!" Emmett called over my ear. "Commeee onnnn!" He wined, "I've been waiting too long!" and with that, he threw me up in the air and caught me on his back. Spinning me around the room a few times and laughing about how now I could try to beat him at an arm wrestle.

I jumped off his back to see who was next but I was slammed into by a massive force and pinned between Jasper's body and the bedroom wall. "Bella, Bella! You have no idea how long I have wanted to do this!" I laughed while he smelled my hair and skin, "And see!?" he asked, "No temptation! Your smell is not at all appealing to me!"

We laughed for a few minutes and I realized how much fun I was going to have getting to know my family all over again, but as a vampire!

"Don't I get an introduction!?" My Edward asked, and I realized he was still waiting patiently on my now tattered bed. I through myself over the floor and flew into his arms.

"Well." I told him, "There is one thing I have desperately wanted to try since I got changed," and at that I ran my fingers into his hair and kissed him like I had never kissed him before.

I could almost feel the love emanating between us. It was pure and unspoiled. And yet over the love, one person in particular was throwing a very pointed emotion at me.

_Jealousy._

**What did you think? And once more, this is a JasperxBella fic so don't stress, it will all get good. If I get enough reviews I will update straight away. Thanks XXX**


	2. Protector

**Hi guys! Thanks so much for the reviews, they made me very happy! Haha! Okay, as I promised the next chapter, I tried to make this one longer for you!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, if I did… let's just say the couplings might be a little different… hehe!**

Chapter 2: Protector

Jealousy. It was everywhere. Coursing through my veins, but no one else seemed to feel it. Edward sure wasn't distracted as he hungrily fought for dominance kissing me. Was it just me? Who was I jealous of? Before I could ponder the question further, Alice ripped me from me stone embrace.

"Okay, lets keep it PG+13! Not all of us want to see you guys going at it like horny sophomores!"

"They **are **just horny kids after all…" Emmett muttered under his breath, clearly not accustomed to my vampire hearing.

"Uh Emmett, remember? Vampire now! I can hear all your slandering and allegations!" I laughed to him.

Emmett's booming laughter echoed through my home. "Haha, Sorry Bell, Forgot about that! That's sure going to take some getting used to! Now I guess I'll just have to insult you to your face!"

"Well you know what Emmett… You…" I tried to think of some sort of witty come back, or something equally funny, but I couldn't! so I settled for poking my tongue out at him.

"Okay I think we've had enough childish banter for one day, don't you think!?" Jasper's perfect melodic voice called out.

"I for one, can't wait to see Bella's reaction when she see's herself in the mirror!"

My curiosity immediately pricked. "Well if I'm anywhere near as good as the way you and Emmett's ogling made me feel, then I'm bound to be some what attractive!" I cleverly quipped at Jasper.

He looked away from me, feeling incredibly embarrassed, and I immediately felt terrible for making fun of him. I had the strongest urge to rap my arms around his cold, stone chest and hug him till he felt better, so I acted on my urge and ran over to him and caught him in my arms, after all we were siblings now. You comforted your siblings when they were sad, didn't you?

"Really Jasper" I spoke to him, "If anything I found it a huge compliment that Gods like you and Emmett would ever find me appealing- in a physical way that is. Not the; 'I want rip your head of and drink from you brain stem!" I said laughing.

He chuckled at me and threw me over his shoulder. "Well, come on then. Don't you want to see yourself!?"

I immediately felt a surge of jealousy, and looked over to find Edward staring at Jaspers playful embrace.

I hopped of his shoulders and walked over to Edward and gave him a quick peck on the cheek, squeezing his hand. "I'm still your Bella aren't I? Even without the warmth and the clumsy nature?"

"Of course you are! What kind of question is that?" He said pulling my lips to meet his.

"Well then there's no reason to be jealous of such a brotherly act of Jasper throwing me over his shoulder, is there?"

"Wait Bella…. What… You could feel what I felt?"

"Well, yeah? But I mean… that's always… like"

Realization hit me. "OOOhhhhhh!!" I called out. "I'm an empath! Just like you Jasper!" and just like that, I was back in Jasper's arms, jumping on the spot about how exciting our new 'double team' -as Jasper liked to call it- would work out!

"Well hang on Bella," Carlisle spoke out. "We should probably how far the extent of your power reaches."

"What do you mean?" I asked warily.

"I mean, well lets see how potent your power is. Many vampires -If the urge is strong enough- can completely manipulate another through their 'abilities,' in your case you may be able to permanently change one of our emotions, for say… perhaps a day, as apposed to Jasper's limit."

"Well how do we test it!?" I asked

"Here Bella, let me give you a quick example," Jasper said. "I'm going to try and manipulate Edward's emotion so that he feels nothing but extreme happiness, ready? Now!"

"NO DON'T!" I screamed. It was irrational, but I thought Jasper messing with Edward's emotions might cause him to fall out of love with me. Completely irrational, but justified. I had lost Edward once before.

"Wait a minute Bella, do that again!" Jasper asked.

"Do what? I didn't do anything! Did I?"

"Just then, when you wanted me to stop, I couldn't touch Edward. It was as if there was some sort of wall there. Enabling me from reaching him. I think you may also be able to extend your powers so that you can shield others from intrusion. It's like complete privacy in other words!"

"Oooooooh!" Alice chirped in, "try me!! Maybe you can protect other's from my gift too!"

"And mine also!" Edward spoke up. "Perhaps Bella can protect from all vampire abilities!"

"That would be quite a skill Bella. Essentially you could protect your entire family from dangers and other forces!"

"Well that's definitely it, isn't it?" Rosalie chirped in.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"Well come on Bella! All you've ever wanted to do is protect us! Think about it!" She said staring incredulously at me. When I didn't respond, clearly not understanding she continued.

"Come on! Think of James, you ran away to find him on your own because you didn't want **us** to get hurt!"

"That's a good point Rosalie!" Esme said.

"And then there was that whole 'I'm going to fly to Italy and almost die to save Edward' thing!"

Edward gave her a pointed stare.

"Well obviously I'm glad she did!" she continued, "I'm just saying that she was willing to die so that you could live! Even just a couple of months ago! She sliced open her damn arm when she was surrounded by three vampires -one of which has an uncontrollable lust for her blood- and she did it all so she could save you, Edward!"

Rosalie was starting to make sense, all I had ever wanted to do was protect **them!** And now I could! I could protect them against any vampiric force there was!

"I mean god, we should have seen it sooner! You're practically a walking martyr!" Rosalie finished up! "In a good way though!" she said, trying to compliment me.

I was trying to concentrate on what she was saying, but the only thing I could focus on was a sharp, fiery pain in the back of my throat.

"That's the thirst…"

Jasper told me, obviously sensing my discomfort. "It never fully goes away, but we can lessen it, I promise you."

I looked up into his deep caramel eyes and realized at once that mine would not be like that.

"Mirror!" I shouted. "We've been putting it off long enough!" and with that I sprinted off towards the walk in robe.

"Now Remember," Edward whispered into my ear, "You were always the most beautiful creature alive to me…"

"Thank you." I said softly. "But I've really got to see, the suspense is killing me!"

I yanked open the door and stared into the long mirror, but oddly, a stranger stared back. It was me of course, but I was different. I was beautiful! My legs, now fully revealed by my clothing attire, or lack of as the case was, were beautifully long and tone. The skin was delicate snowy white and extended all the way up my body. My breasts, barely incased in the small bra had grown firmer and more full, I had the strongest urge to touch them, but my god would that be the most embarrassing thing in the world! I had a flat, tone stomach and my neck seemed to have grown thinner and more delicate, leading up to my face.

My face? Is that my face? I had high cheek bones and a small defined nose. My hair cascaded in waves down my back just above my waist, and my eyes…. Well they would take some getting used to until I hunted. Scarlet red, filled with the color of a memory. My memory, my Bella. But that wasn't who I was anymore. And the red that would fade in my eyes only confirmed that. I looked over my figure and face one more time and for the second time that day said;

"Holy crap!"

My family laughed once again in perfect harmony.

"Well Bells, now that you've seen the exquisite form that is you, how about we relieve that horrible fire burning in the back of your throat?" Jasper said.

I nodded silently, still enthralled by myself. Well, I thought to myself, I suppose vanity comes with being an incredible vampire.

"Okay then!" Emmett cheered from behind me,

"Lets go hunting!"

**Next chapter is her first hunt! Pretty self explanatory!**

**Okay another chapter! I will definitely update again today, because it is currently 10.30 in the morning and honestly, I've got nothing better to do! So I will update by tonight if you guys want me to? Do you? Haha!**

**I'm going to keep this relationship slow with BellaxJasper, so don't expect them just to jump into bed with each other next chapter lol! I'm going to build a whole hell of a lot of sexual tension haha! But they will get together! I hate stories that start off as BellaxJasper and then randomly swap back to canon pairings, This is JasperxBella all the way!!**

**X O X O X O X O**


	3. The Hunt

**Okay, I have posted 3 chapters in less than twenty four hours! I don't know what happened with my last chapter though, because I posted the new chapter but for some reason it didn't say it had been updated… well I'm still figuring it all out! Oh and I'm posting this before I have gotten any reviews on chapter 2, so if you asked me a question in chapter 2, I'm not ignoring you I just didn't get it :D **

**Enjoy the sexual tension!**

**Disclaimer:**** No, I do not own Twilight!**

Chapter 3: The Hunt

"Hunting…right.." I chuckled nervously "I mean of course I'll be hunting, how else do you get the…. Blood.. Haha…"

The truth was I hadn't given much thought at all to the whole 'rip things apart with my teeth drink it dry' thing. I think I had just expected it to kind of come to me. That I would know what to do and the hunting aspect wouldn't be a big deal at all. But the truth was I was mortified! I was scared I would screw up and kill a thousand deer, or cause a species to become extinct.

"Bella please!" Jasper spoke up, "Your emotions are driving me insane! You're going to be fine, I'll be there the entire time. You won't kill too many, and I certainly won't let you kill a human!"

Human! Ugh! I hadn't even thought of that! What if I came across Angela, or Ben!? We were still partially in forks, we had decided it would be best to move after the change- as not to alert the wolves. But then Jasper wouldn't let me kill anyone would he!? He said himself; He'd be there the entire….

"Hang on!" I almost shouted! "What do you mean **you'll **be there the entire time? What about everyone else? They need to hold me back if I go crazy! What if I hurt you Jasper, trying to get to a human? I can't hurt you, I won't!"

"See!? Martyr complex!" Rosalie laughed

"But I could Rosalie!" I continued "Edward you said it yourself, I am much stronger as a new born than any of you! What if I kill him!" I was getting hysterical "Alice I'm so sorry I don't want to kill him, I'm sorry!"

My family was laughing at me, I was being irrational I know, but I couldn't stand hurting any one of them, let alone a man I so desperately wanted to know.

"Bella Please!!" Edward said to me chuckling, "Will you stop stressing out and listen to me?"

I sat down on the edge of the bed and patiently waited for him to continue.

"We've worked it all out already. We decided it while you were.. Uhem.." He spoke clearing his throat, "While you were…. Temporarily incapacitated.."

"AKA You were suffering blinding pain and torment, so we decided we should probably leave you out of it!" Emmett shouted laughing!

"EMMETT!" Edward scolded, swinging an arm at his head but missing because he was already on the floor in hysterics.

"Anyway, before I was so rudely interrupted, I was going to tell you that we've decided to split up for your first hunt."

He looked at me, expecting me to say something, when I didn't he continued.

"So we're going to go off in pairs, as to not overwhelm you. We'll all be within a five mile radius, so if anything happens we can be there in a second."

"Okayyy…." I said, still unsure of what he was actually trying to say.

"So we'll be hunting in a forest just outside of Forks. It's well away from any wolf activity so we should be safe on that aspect. Carlisle and I will be taking the northern sector, Esme and Alice; the south end. Emmett and Rosalie will be hunting west, and you and Jasper will be taking the eastern side; where there is plenty of fauna."

"Uhuh… so then…WAIT!" I said, "You're not coming with me!? You said you wanted to teach me!"

"And I will love, I promise. But for this first time its just about reigning you in. A large group of us together may alert the wolves. You and Jasper seemed liked the right choice, because he knows so much more about newborn strength and speed than the rest of us."

"No you're right," I said embarrassed at my outburst, "Me and Jasper together is right."

As soon as I said the words I felt weird. They weren't meant to be, but the statement came out romantic and meaningful, it bothered me. Not because I didn't feel like that at all about Jasper, but rather because something in my body just sort of reacted to the sentence; like it meant something more. Apparently it didn't bother anyone else however, as they were all already discussing hunting tactics and feeding grounds. Jasper, however was not.

I looked up meeting his eyes, and he smiled nervously like a fifth grader being caught staring at his crush. I smiled back and skipped over to him. If we were going to be hunting buddies we needed to get well acquainted.

"So! Double team members become double hunting partners too!" I laughed referring to his nick name for our double empath ability team.

"Yep!" He said, popping the 'P' sound! "And if we're going to be hunting partners, I suggest we create a new language, based only on a precise number of facial winks and tongue clicks!" He said, making the most random joke I had ever heard.

"Sort of like morse code!" I said laughing hysterically!

"Exactly!" He shouted excitedly!

I'm not sure how long we laughed for, it was almost impossible to tell. Two empath vampires, feeding of each other's hysterics, a constant circle of life- or laughter as the case may be.

After a certain amount of time had passed, I felt an intruding emotion interfering with our care free nature. It was impatience. Both Jasper and I felt it, as we looked up to find the rest of the family staring skeptically at us, apparently unaware of the humor of facial morse code.

"Shall we get going then?" Edward asked, a little crabbily. He was clearly upset at the manner I was handling the situation with.

I walked over to the bed and slipped on a pair of skinny jeans and a plain, blue shirt that Alice had laid out as my 'Hunting Attire.' And when I looked over, Edward still seemed a little upset with me.

I skipped forward and grabbed his hand. "Don't be upset with us. Jasper is making it a lot easier for me to handle this. If it wasn't for him, I may still be apologizing to Alice over Jasper's 'sure to be near' death!" I laughed, trying to make a joke.

"I wasn't upset with you, I was just…"

"Empath, remember!?" I said laughing "I can always tell!"

"I'm sorry," he said giving me a quick peck on the cheek. Then he moved his hand behind my neck and kissed me more forcefully and passionately.

I wasn't complaining, but I couldn't help but wonder why he was trying to make such a scene. It was as if he were trying to 'mark his territory' on my lips, As if to say 'your mine.' I pushed such thoughts from my head, when I realized we were walking past the garage.

"Uh guys, this might be the stupid thing to say, but didn't we just walk past the cars?"

"We did!" Alice said mischievously, her eyes twinkling.

"Okay, so what? We have some giant car that you have to hide in the bush to be conspicuous?"

"No silly Bella," Rosalie said smiling her dazzling smile. "We're running!"

"Running!" I shouted! I did not have kind memories of running. In fact, almost all of them had some connotation of motion sickness or dizziness.

"Darling Bella! You were human when you had those past experiences, you're a vampire now. Running will come second nature to you!" Esme said comfortingly.

"Like hunting?" I asked hopefully

"Not quite Bella," Carlisle said. "But practice makes perfect. You're sure to pick up your own hunting patterns and skills very quickly!"

"Okay, but you'll teach me till I get there, right Jasper?" I asked

"Absolutely!" He said reassuringly, "Of course, all my instructions will be told in facial morse code so you're going to have to keep up!" He said, bursting out laughing at the end! I couldn't help it I started laughing too, and soon we were back in the circle of laughter again.

"Okay, lets not get back into this again. I know vampires don't need to breath, but this much laughter just can't be good for you!" Alice said, clearly impatient with us.

"Okay, everyone listen up," Edward called over to us. "This is where we are going to split up. Everyone stay within the designated limits and if you hear anything suspicious at all, find each other!"

"Bella love," he came over to me. "Please be careful. I just found you, I can't bear to lose you so quickly! Please don't do anything reckless," and with a quick peck on the lips and a gust of a breeze my family was gone. Leaving me and Jasper alone at the corner of the forest.

Running. Right. I had to do it now. Ah! But I couldn't! What if some of my crazy Bella clumsiness transferred into my new life?! What if I hit a tree? What if I hit ten trees, causing a massive clearing in the forest?

"My God Bella!" Jasper said, "Do you stress out over everything!?" he said laughing and poking me in the ribs.

Such a gesture might have tickled me when I was human, but now I was immune to such taunts and I responded by poking him, somewhat harder on his stomach.

"What was that Bella? Do you dare to challenge me at a poking duel?" He said feigning mock horror and surprise.

"Why Mr. Whitlock/Hale/Cullen" I joked, using all three of his last names, "You have never fought against the likes of me! I dare say that you will lose quite terribly if we engage in this 'poking duel.'"

And with that he jumped at me, pushing me down into the ground and pinning me beneath his weight poking me in the stomach and attempting to tickle me under the arms.

However, I was the new born. I quickly flipped him over, so that I was straddling his hips with mine as I locked my feet together behind his back.

"Mwahaha" Jasper called out melodramatically, "this does nothing to hold me prisoner!" And as he said that he rolled me backwards so that I, once again, was pinned between him and the ground.

I'm not sure at what point it stopped be play fighting but I could feel his lust building strongly, and I was sure that he could feel mine. Neither one of us had realized what a compromising position we were in.

Jasper had his crotch pushed against mine, I had my arms and legs tangled around his back, and he was using his arms to hold me against his chest. If I had wanted to, it would have been only to easy to kiss him.

But what!? No! I wasn't going to kiss him. This was just that damn circle of laughter again, but this time it wasn't laughter that was spinning- it was raw lust.

I pushed him off me laughing something about Jasper winning and we should probably get going, all the while desperately wishing I could make the lust stop. And then it went- like that! I realized I must have employed my new 'protection ability' and I had stopped both Jasper and I's feelings.

Jasper seemed to get a hold of some sense of place and purpose at that moment, because he swung his arms around my shoulder saying; "I told you you couldn't beat me! Not even a new born can defeat Jasper; king of the poking!"

I burst out laughing at his ridiculous title for himself, and just like that, we were back to our usual banter and playful friendly joking.

I realized that a good twenty minutes had passed and that the others would have expected me to be hunting. "Uh Jasper, this fire in my throat is threatening to consume me, so perhaps we could get going?"

He didn't say anything, he just winked at me a few times, clicked his tongue and burst out laughing.

"Dam," he said laughing. "I was hoping you might have been able to understand that as morse code for 'lets get going!' But then I realized you probably thought I was trying to itch my face with my eye ball or something"

When I didn't respond, he started laughing "Lets forgot the morse code and get you running shall we?" he said poising his hand out in a way most gentlemanly.

"It would be my honor!" I said faking a posh accent and taking his hand.

"Then lets GO!" And then we were running.

But it wasn't running. It was flying. **I** was flying.

The trees whipped past but never touched my face, when I was comfortable enough and sure that I wasn't going to hit a tree, I turned my face to look at Jasper. His face held such a carefree, serene expression. He was truly in his element here. As the wind whipped past his face, his golden honey hair fell into his eyes, but it didn't take away from his beauty. I marveled in it. How one could ever look so graceful and gorgeous. I had never been able to see Edward's face when he ran, I was always closing my eyes to prevent throwing up, but I was sure that if I had taken the time to look, he would have looked just as beautiful, if not more so, than Jasper.

Jasper turned to look at me and I relinquished my hold on our emotions and let them fly free. There was no more raw lust. There was pure joy and happiness, mixed with an emotion I couldn't identify. He smiled at me and mouthed 'stop,' so I did.

We were standing in a large clearing, beneath a canopy of surrounding tree tops. Had it been sunny I would have sparkled in certain parts of the clearing, but as I had come to expect; Forks was rarely sunny.

Then something hit me. It was like a stone force that winded me and pushed the air from me lungs. It wasn't physical, but rather it was a scent.

"Is that a human scent?!" I asked hysterically

"No Bella, that is but a fraction of how a human would smell to you…"

"I need it! NOW! Jasper I need it, god! JASPER!" I was screaming and acting like an animal, it disgusted me, but I was acting on pure instinct, I was a predator and I could smell my prey.

"Bella, you can take it. Do what comes naturally to your body. It will not be pretty and you'll probably be drenched in blood by the end, but you'll learn. In time you will hone and perfect your skills as a hunter!"

Hunter? That's right. I **was** a hunter. I would be merciless in my taking of a life.

I was running. Jasper was following. I followed the mouth watering scent till I reached a small cave mouth on the edge of a creek. I watched from my side of the creek to see a grizzly bear stumble slowly from it's habitat to take a drink from the creek.

Funny. Not three years ago I was disgusted with the idea of Emmett's choice in food. Right now, I had never wanted anything more.

"Be careful Bella." Jasper warned, "Grizzlies can be rough, especially straight after hibernation."

Perfect. I thought to myself, as filthy and masochistic as it was, I wanted the bear to fight back. And then- I was flying. Flying through the air as I landed hard as stone on the bear's back. It immediately growled and in some foolish attempt to get me off it's back; rolled over so that it's stomach was facing upwards. I took my opportunity and sliced my razor sharp teeth from it chin to it's throat and drank. The bear was dead as soon as my teeth touched it's skin but I drank it long after, until I was sure I had sucked every last morsel of blood from it's body

As Jasper had predicted I was covered in blood. There was not a shred of clothing or skin that I had not drenched in my taking of the bear's life

I looked at myself in the reflection of the creek. I was a monster. A filthy, creature that deserved to be shot.

"Don't you **ever **feel like that, you hear me!?" shouted Jasper, "You are worth more than any animal could ever be! You mean everything to this family and to m…." Suddenly I was in Jasper's arms, dry sobbing into his chest. At first I wouldn't let him hold me, I didn't think that I deserved it, but I grew weary of fighting him and let him cradle me in his arms long after I had stopped sobbing.

"Thank you." I whispered hoarsely.

I looked up into his eyes and he laughed a quiet, low laugh.

"What?" I asked curious.

"Your eyes." He spoke softly, "They're already beginning to change…"

He held my gaze and pulled me closer to him, tucking my head under his chin. I felt so comfortable there, I was contemplating asking if we could stay here all night.

"BELLA!?" Edward appeared at the edge of the clearing, followed closely by the rest of the family.

"Oh my sweet Bella, it's okay," Edward whispered as he ripped me from Jaspers embrace. "Every one feels like that the first time, it will get better I promise."

I nodded mutely as he led me back to the others.

"Can we go home please?" I asked softly

Edward looked at me in the eyes and nodded.

"Lets go ho-

"ALRIGHT!" Emmett's voice boomed over Edward's, "BELLA SCORED HERSELF A GRIZZLY!"

**I don't know how I felt about this chapter, I feel it was a bit everywhere… what did you think?**

**Just to let you know, three chapters in a day is not a usual thing okay hahaha!**

**X o x o x o x o X**


	4. Filthy Beautiful

**Thank you for your kind reviews! They give me inspiration to write! **

**My updates, won't be quite as frequent until the coming weekend, because then I'll be on holidays, and there will be daily updates!! Haha!**

**I hope you enjoy this chapter, I'm writing it at ten o'clock at night, so it may not be too well written! Also I know it's not as long as the other one, but I just thought I would give you something until Thursday. Plus this chapter is sort of a turning point in the relationship and I thought it should have a chapter to itself.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer:**** I don't own Twilight, or any of the characters!**

Chapter 4: Filthy Beautiful

We ran home as a family. A pack moving swiftly and silently through the night.

It began to rain heavily, causing large droplets of water to cascade down my hair and onto my skin.

The rain no longer bothered me like it use to. I found it refreshing and invigorating. It worked to wash away the blood and dirt of my past- both figuratively and literally. The storm that raged over head only mirrored my current mood. I was upset and angry with myself. Angry for losing control so easily.

Edward had said that everyone's first hunt had gone more or less the same way. But I could hardly imagine someone so dainty like Alice, or someone so respectful like Carlisle, tearing an animal's flesh from it's bone and massacring it's corpse- drenching themselves in their victim's blood.

I was weak. Weak and foolish for thinking that this would be easy.

We began to slow down as the large white mansion came into sight at the edge of the clearing.

"Bella honey, we're home now… Did you want to go up to the bathroom and clean up, or we could stay here… or … what would you like to do?"

Edward's soothing voice was not having it's usual effect. He was trying too hard to make everything better. It was frustrating and irritating.

"I think I might stay here for a while. Just a few minutes… I have some things to think about."

"Sure, that's fine love. We could just sit and talk, or sit in silence…?"

"No Edward, you misunderstand me. **Just **me." I replied sharply.

His emotions changed drastically at this. He was hurt deeply by my pointed words.

"Okay." He whispered, clearly upset.

"I'm sorry Edward. I'm just feeling a little overwhelmed right now and I need some time alone. I shouldn't have snapped at you. You've done nothing wrong." I replied softly.

"Take all the time you need. We'll all be right inside." He answered giving me a soft kiss on the lips. I nodded glumly, too distracted to kiss him back.

Then one by one, my family members disappeared inside the house, departing with a gentle nod in my direction, or in Alice's case; a quick kiss on the cheek.

Jasper however was not with them.

He was not here either. Had he run from me? Was I that repulsive?

This thought hurt me more than it should have. But I had thought we had grown closer. In less than a day I had bonded more with him than I had in the last three years. But then perhaps I **had** frightened him. I had acted so vulgar and wild, could he not handle that side of me? Had I ruined our potential relationship with him already? I wanted to be his best friend.

I began to shake and sob as these thoughts registered. I couldn't blame him though. I probably wouldn't have wanted to be friends with such a monster either.

I ran at full power back into the woods, not paying attention at all at where I was going. Surely if by some way I became lost, Alice would see it and I would be found.

Alice.

She could see it all now. See how weak and stupid I was. She could see what I was doing- and she knew very well why I was doing it. I hated it! I hated that she could violate my privacy like that, peer in whenever it suited her.

My privacy?

And then I remembered. We had never fully tested the extent of my power. But Carlisle had mentioned that I may be able to protect myself -and others- from such vampire abilities. Surely I could protect myself from Alice's intrusion. All I had to do was concentrate, like I had earlier in the clearing with Jasper.

I focused all my energy on one single thought.

_I am alone. You can not view what I may do, or what I am currently doing. I am alone. I am alone. I am alone._

And then two things happened.

I felt a surge run through my body and I knew my mantra had rendered me an exception from Alice's vision -For now at least.

And then I felt a pair of smooth, strong hands slide into mine.

"I'm so sorry for leaving. Can you ever forgive me? Its just that when you were hunting, you were just.. You were so…"

_Filthy, disgusting, inexcusable… _I thought to my self.

"… beautiful." He finished

I spun around to meet Jasper's eyes. He was staring into mine, and his eye's did not hold even a flicker or dishonesty.

"Beautiful!?" I spat out, "I was disgusting! I completely defiled that animal's corpse. I was drenched in blood, not one single part of me resembled anything close to beauty."

"You don't understand…" he began. "It wasn't the manner in how you did it, or the end result and how you may have appeared.. It was.. It was just…"

"What?!" I asked incredulously

"It was your poise and action. The way you executed the animal. It was flawless and polished! I've never seen a new born with such skill and passion for the hunt!"

"This isn't a compliment!" I shouted at him

"But it is!" he countered, "You should have seen my first time. I couldn't even get the dam deer on it's back until a few seconds!"

"A few seconds!" I scoffed "That nothing!"

"You had your teeth to it's neck in half a second," he continued as if uninterrupted. "You may not have handled it's corpse with the daintiest of fashions, but don't you see!? You're a natural at it! It's sleek and unplanned… it's beautiful." He finished up.

I was silent for a few minutes. Jasper didn't try to manipulate my emotions- and for this I was glad.

"You actually thought I was beautiful?" I asked, stunned by his honesty and sincerity.

"I did."

"Thank you Jasper." I answered him. "Every body has been trying to act like it was no big deal- as if it wouldn't happen again. But you told it like it is. Given, you had a bit of a weird attraction to the whole 'she-predator' killer though," I chuckled.

"To each man his own," he murmured softly.

I had heard the expression before, but never really understood it. I didn't question him on it though. It seemed as if he was talking to himself.

"Would you like to go back now?" Jasper asked, breaking the silence. "We don't have to if you don't like, but I know maybe you'd like to put on some fresh clothes and bathe… I can feel your discomfort pretty strongly."

"Thank you Jasper. And not just for now. For helping me through this all. I know it can't be easy being the 'new born tamer' and all, but I really appreciate everything you have done for me."

He smiled a very large smile at this, and I knew my words had touched him.

"Come on filthy beautiful," he chuckled. "Let's get you back to that hubby of your's before he thinks I've taken you to Alaska, or you've been eaten by wolves."

Edward! I thought to myself. I had completely forgotten about him. He had no idea where I was, Alice couldn't see me either! What if they thought I **had** run off with wolves? After all, Alice couldn't see my future when I was with them either, how was she to know?

"We should probably hurry," I said. "I sort of… blocked myself from Alice's vision!" I said in a rush.

"huh," said Jasper. "That probably mean's that they can't see me either. That's how it worked with the wolves didn't it?"

"Yeah, you're probably right," I said dismissively. I wasn't concentrating, I didn't want them to stress.

"Then technically we could get up to a whole lot of mischief and they would never know!" Jasper said jokingly, swinging his arm over my shoulder. "Just think of the possibilities!"

"Yeah," I joked. "We could have hundreds of poking wars and they would be none the wiser!"

He looked down at me and winked. And as I analyzed the many emotions that were coursing between us, I picked up one from Jasper that seemed to surprise me the most.

It was hope.

**Again, I'm sorry that its so short! I hope you enjoyed reading it though! I noticed on my last chapter that 80 of you read it, but only 6 reviewed! Please review; negative or positive it all helps!**

**I have a basic idea of where this story is going, but if any of you have any ideas, or funny bits you'd like me to put in, please tell me- I would really appreciate it!**

**I'll update again as soon as I can!**

**Thanks!**

**X o X o X o X o X o X o X**


	5. My Sunny Heart

**Again, Thank you to all my wonderful readers and reviewers, you guys make me very happy!! I hope you enjoyed the last chapter! This one is going to be a little less 'confronting' (Not that the others really were) than the past two chapters!**

**It's just sort of the after math of the hunt, and the lead up to some Cullen family fun!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer:**** I don't own Twilight, or anything related- just my ideas!**

Chapter 5: My Sunny Heart

A strange thought occurred to me while Jasper and I were running. I was incredibly happy. Happier than I thought I ought to be.

Hadn't I just been sobbing alone on the forest floor about slaughtering my first hunt? I was sure that I had been. I was also sure that Jasper wasn't manipulating my emotions, as he was soaring through the air with his eye's closed- not a trouble in the world. Or at least not enough of a trouble to worry about changing my emotions to better suit his needs.

I reached a reasonable conclusion almost immediately.

If Jacob had been my personal sun, and Edward my heart- Jasper was almost certainly a mixture between the two. He was able to make me laugh at the drop of a pin- but unlike Emmett, Jasper could also be incredibly sentimental and sweet, He could talk to me like there was no one else in the world. It was a rare and beautiful balance.

Jasper had found a small piece of my heart, albeit a more sturdy- less human piece of my heart, but it was a piece nonetheless. He had the ability to give me such wonderfully happy emotions, without having to resort to his vampire abilities. I had a loving husband, a loving family **and** a wonderfully loving friend.

I was happy.

Jasper took my hand and linked his fingers through mine.

"You're happy," he said smiling a heart breaking smile. "Would I be awfully presumptuous to say that it was your company, namely me, that was having this miraculous effect on you?"

I laughed at his honesty, and decided to try some of it myself.

"Well, if we're being honest… then yes- you would be playing a small role in that," I said smiling at him.

"A small role?!" He asked in mock horror.

"Welllll….. Maybe more like a feature role," I replied laughing at him.

"Next thing you know I'll be the star of **that** show!" He said joking,

I laughed at him, then replied in perfect honesty "I don't doubt that…"

He turned to face me and smiled a huge smile, which abruptly turned into a frown.

"What.." I began to ask him. But then I felt it too. Panic and stress emanating in full force from our home. I sighed, so much for my happy moment.

I knew that this was important, that the family was worried about me and it was all my fault, but I was in an honest mood, and what I wanted more than anything else in the world right now was to avoid this entire situation, and go up stairs and wash the blood from my skin and hair.

"Bella listen," Jasper started, "I know you really don't want to deal with this right now…"

"No really Jasper, I'm fine… I'm just-"

"Empath." He stated clearly, ruining my lie. I laughed at him.

"Right… I should remember that!" I said, still laughing.

"Really Bella, I want you to sneak upstairs now- you can use mine and Alice's bathroom, I'll sort this whole thing out with the family, I'll tell them you were feeling overwhelmed. You just rest for now." Jasper said in all sincerity.

I was going to argue with him, to tell him I was fine and that this was my mess, so I should clean it up, but what he said sounded so appealing, that instead of arguing with him, I said simply;

"…My sunny heart, thank you."

He stared at me skeptically.

"Care to elaborate?" He said smiling.

"Just something I was thinking about earlier," I said. "I decided that you're something between my personal sun and my heart… it's nothing…" I said looking down, feeling foolish.

He lifted my chin up with his fore finger and his thumb so that I was looking into his eyes.

"It's everything… thank you for thinking of my so fondly." He stated sweetly, "Now go, so that I can handle all this," he said, finishing by kissing me on my forehead.

The gesture could have been considered by some to be the mark of a loving sibling, but the undeniable devotion he had felt when he kissed me left me tingling and wanting more.

As he disappeared into the house, I was left standing in the drizzle wondering how deep the veins of our new bond ran. And how would I handle more, if the mere gesture of a forehead kiss had made my knee's wobble. I felt guilty immediately for thinking such thoughts when I had Edward, so I decided to return to the task at hand.

I stalked past the dining room window, concealing myself to the shadows. I saw all of my family surrounding Jasper and Edward shooting glances towards the stairs- where he no doubt expected me to be.

I found the large maple tree leading up to the roof quite suitable for what I was about to do. As I began to climb it's sturdy branches, the voices of a heated argument downstairs reached my ears. Fragments of broken sentences formed in my ears and I gathered the topic of conversation was me.

"_You should have told us…."_

"_We thought you two had been taken by wolves or something how were we to know?!"_

"_She was overwhelmed, but give her __**some**__ credit she's not that foolish…" _I heard Jasper yell, defending me.

"_Why were __**you**__ even with her!? Why wasn't I there with her? I mean what possible things could you two have in common?!"_

Edwards harsh, accusations cut through me and I almost fell straight through Jasper's bathroom window. How dare he talk to Jasper like that! Jasper was my friend and he had helped me through all of this. Where Edward had pushed and pushed, Jasper had let me feel what I wanted to, even if it wasn't good, he gave me time!

I jumped lithely through the bathroom window and landed gracefully on the smooth, cold tile. I spotted several dainty pairs of Alice's underwear drying on the bath edge, they were obviously for Jasper's eyes only.

This thought made me incredibly jealous. But why? I didn't want Jasper in a sexual way, did I? He was attractive, of course. That loose flowing blonde hair, piercing eyes, tone muscled chest…leading down to … STOP BELLA! I mentally scolded myself. I have Edward.

In fact, I'm sure Alice already has some of this type of underwear picked out for me… for Edward. Ugh. I was so angry at Edward for being rude to Jasper, that the mere thought of pleasing him, sexually especially, disgusted me.

I pushed the thoughts from my mind, as I peeled of my bloody clothing. I threw the clothes in the bin near the bath, it wasn't like they were salvageable and I'm sure Alice would never have let me wear the same outfit twice anyway. My underwear wasn't quite so bloody but perhaps it was just harder to tell because they were black. I left them on for now anyway, as I walked to the shower.

As I turned the water on, I noticed that the argument downstairs had stopped. Several pairs of footsteps could be heard walking away to different sections of the house. One pair however came straight to the bathroom door.

There was a soft knock at the door.

"Are you decent? Can I come in for a second?" Came Jasper's sweet melodic voice.

"Uhh.." I looked down at my body. I still had my underwear on, and most of my skin was covered by blood. Besides I had come out of my change in less than this.

"Sure, come in" I replied.

I watched the door knob turn, as Jasper stepped into the large bathroom.

When he saw that I was so scantily clad, I felt two things.

A large amount of embarrassment coming from Jasper, no doubt because of the predicament I had put him in, And an even larger amount of lust and want. The second hit me like a ton of bricks, and I had to use all my strength not to jump him right where he was.

"S..sorry…" He said shyly looking down. "I just thought you'd want to know that everyone has calmed down, and they were wondering if you wanted to come down and play a game after your shower or something?"

"A game?" I asked curiously. It was the last thing I expected him to say.

"Well yeah…" He said sneaking a glance at my body, then staring down again. "We actually have a long tradition of playing games after we hunt!" He said jokingly.

"Oh really, Poking King?" I said using his ridiculous title for himself.

"Definitely! We have turns of picking, I think its Emmett's turn today, no wait… that was last time!" He said laughing, obviously at some memory of playing Emmett's game, which was no doubt strip poker. "No, it's Alice's turn today!"

"Ah," I said joking, "So no strip poker today!?"

He chuckled, still staring down.

"So…You're in?" He said nervously, as if frightened I would reject him.

"I'll be down in ten!" I said excitedly.

I felt a surge of happiness run through me, and I wasn't sure if it was just me, or a combination of both our excitement.

He stole one last glance at me, looking me up and down as if he wanted to devour me. If I had been human, I would have blushed terribly.

"Great!" He said, snapping out of his daze, "It will be much more fun with an eighth member!" He said laughing.

I smiled at him as he turned and close the door behind him.

I peeled of the rest of my clothing and stepped into the shower. The water was much warmer than I had anticipated, but I supposed that was to be expected now that I was ten degrees cooler.

As I washed away blood and dirt of the day, the arguing began to erupt again downstairs, but unlike last time- they seemed to be arguing over what game to play with the newcomer. Me.

When they arguing finally ceased, I turned off the shower, excited to learn of what game was to be played. I stepped out of the shower as a large, booming voice carried itself up the stairs, right to my ears.

"ALRIGHT!" Emmett yelled, "WE'RE PLAYING TWISTER!"

**Haha, sweet Emmett. So next chapter we have the twister game, which should be fun to write, all those different positions lol! I'm almost on holidays, I can't wait because then I can write without worrying about school!**

**Review please! Tell me what you thought!**

**X o x o x o x o x**


	6. Epiphany

_**Hello all!**_

_**Thank you for all your kind reviews, this is probably the longest I've ever gone without updating -and seeing as it's only been two days I'd say that's pretty good lol!**_

_**Today I give you a celebratory holidays longer chapter! As you'll remember it's the twister chapter which should be fun! Also Bella has a sort of revelation about Jasper. Hahahahaha and boy oh boy did I squeeze a lot of sexual tension into this chapter, so read on!**_

_**Enjoy!**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight!**_

_Chapter 6: Epiphany_

_I stepped out of the shower and onto the cold, smooth tiles. The mirror had completely fogged over so that I couldn't see myself at all. _

'_Good', _I thought to myself. After all, I was beginning to feel like a narcissist; always looking in mirrors, admiring my new face and body.

I grabbed a small bathing towel off the back of the door and dried my self quickly, I was eager to rejoin the others and begin the battle of twister.

I laughed to myself. Only the Cullen family could play a game like Twister and turn it into the most competitive game in the world.

After a few moments of toweling myself dry I realized I didn't actually have any clothing that was not drenched in blood. I searched the bathroom for any clothing of Alice's, but found only skimpy launderette and heels.

'_Well.. That might work…' _I joked to myself, '…_If I wanted to knock myself out with outpouring lust from every male in the room!' _I thought laughing…Ugh! Narcissist! I quickly scolded myself.

Then logic hit me, _Closet_! I thought to myself. Why hadn't I thought of that earlier- Alice had an entire room full of clothing which I highly doubted she would mind me borrowing.

I wrapped the small towel around my waist and pried the bathroom door open an inch. I looked around the large room, and once I was sure there was no one there I stepped out.

I realized that I had never quite studied Jasper and Alice's room before. When ever I had been in here previously, it was always to my dismay- makeovers and other such torture. Looking around the large expanse now, I realized that Alice had dominated a large role in the decorating scheme. There was a large lilac colored feature wall, several make up desks, and then pushed into a small corner- a book shelf, which I assumed was Jasper's, never having seen Alice with a book in her hand. The piece of furniture that took up the largest portion of the room was a large four poster bed, which I mentally cringed at; imagining all the things it was **actually** used for. This thought in particular scared me.

Why did everything Jasper and Alice did together in private make me jealous? I had grown considerably closer to Jasper, but underneath the harmless friendship I knew something ran deeper. A primal force that drew me to him, like magnets. I was immediately incredibly frightened by this revelation. I **was** attracted to Jasper, but the thing that frightened me most of all was that I knew it was not purely infatuation.

I was married! To Edward! Who loved me more than I deserved. Given, he was a tad over protective, but he had loved me more than I had ever known and I loved him.

I loved him. No, not past tense. **Love **him, I **love **him. It wasn't a lie, but it wasn't purely truth either.

Not wishing to deal with the confusing state that was my heart, I did what I had done so well for years; I buried it. Deep within myself, I buried the entire problem, willing to deal with it at a later time- if the time presented itself necessary.

I walked over to the large walk in robe and pushed the double doors open. At first glance I thought that the entire closet was just Alice's, but after further analysis I noticed a small portion towards the back which was Jasper's.

As I sifted through the massive array of clothing I found not once single piece of clothing appropriate for a game of twister.

Prom dresses.

Elegant gowns.

Beach wear. _What? _I thought to myself?

Party costumes.

Launderette. Launderette. More launderette.

Where was all the normal clothing? The clothing she had worn to school!

A thought occurred to me at once, did Alice **actually** burn her outfits after wearing them once? Jasper had said it once as a joke, but now I was beginning to suspect it was true!

I burst out laughing. What kind of sister in-law had I gained?

Defeated, I walked over to Jasper's small corner of the room. He had several button up shirts, big enough for me to slip over my form until I got upstairs to my clothing.

I grabbed a deep, ocean blue shirt off a hanger. It was the type of color I had imagined Jasper's eyes may have been at one stage. I decided at once that I liked the shirt. I may even contemplate keeping it, I thought to myself laughing.

The others were most likely getting restless so I undid the shirt's buttons and dropped my towel.

I heard him then, before I saw him.

A sharp intake of breath followed by hard blow of lust. It literally knocked me to the floor flat.

"Uh.. Bell…. sor..ry…. I… I…" Jasper gasped loudly, only igniting the fire of lust between us more. "I…always… seem…. Wrong pla..ce… wrong… time" he struggled out, dragging his breath between his cold, smooth lips.

It took all my effort to concentrate my power on the one single thought, but the end result was pleasing. I pushed up a barrier between our emotions, shielding his lust from me and mine from him.

"I'm so sorry," Jasper spoke, composing himself. "It's just your emotions were so overpowering and they kept changing! Fear, Confusion, hilarity! I just came up to check that you were okay, I had no idea you were so…"

"Naked?" I said joking, and pulling the large, blue shirt over my body. I let go of the control on our emotions, seeing that we both had recovered.

The joke was meant to make him laugh, but the only emotion I felt coming from him was an overwhelming amount of shame and embarrassment.

I walked over to him slowly, careful not to flash again. He put his hands on my shoulders, keeping me at a distance.

"Please don't be upset Jasper, I meant it as a joke. You didn't know what you were walking in on." I spoke softly.

"I never seem to know, but I walk in all the same," he answered, still drowning in his pool of self loathing.

"Listen here!" I said sternly, "I never want to feel that emotion coming from you again, you hear me?" I said menacingly. "So you saw my bum! Who cares? I bet you've seen the entire family naked by now, at least I don't feel excluded anymore!" I said laughing.

He chuckled at this. "Well it's hard not to when certain family members have sex all around the house Cough Rosalie and Emmett Cough" He replied laughing.

"I'm sorry" he said one more time.

"Oh shut up! We're over it now," I said still laughing and holding my arms open to him as a gesture of forgiveness.

He smiled and dropped his arms from my shoulders letting them fall slowly down my body. Both his hands grazed my breasts incredibly slowly and I had to bite down on my lip to keep myself from moaning. Jasper didn't seem to notice at all as he snaked his arms around my waist holding me to him, but the left over sensation made my legs give way and I fell into his embrace.

"What was that?" He said chuckling.

"Uh… I must have.. Slipped…" I said, coming up with the most unfathomable lie possible.

"You slipped…?" He asked curiously.

"Um, wet feet I guess," I answered, finishing up the topic.

"Well come on then, the others are getting impatient," he said changing the subject, which I was eternally thankful for. "And can I suggest," he continued, "you put on some pants?"

"Haha" I said sarcastically, which only made him laugh. "I'll be down in five." And with that, I raced upstairs and slipped on a pair of underwear and denim shorts.

As I ran down stairs I was met with two things; an overly concerned family, and a drastically different dining room.

The family ran up to me at once asking questions such as 'are you okay?' 'Will you be okay to hunt next time?' And one that bothered me in particular from Edward; 'Why wasn't I there?'

I answered them all at once;

"Yes I'm okay now, I am sure that I will be fine to hunt next time, and while I'm sorry that I made you all stress with my whole little 'vision disappear act' at least we know that my power does work and is at full strength. As for you Edward," I said lowering my voice. "You were not there because I asked you not to. You did what I asked, which I am much happier about than if you were to try and force your presence upon me when it was unwanted."

He -and the rest of the family- seemed satisfied with my answers and resumed setting up the game arena.

Edward turned me so that I was facing him.

"I'm sorry for being grouchy, I just like to help you with these problems…" he spoke into my ear.

Over the corner of my shoulder I saw Jasper staring at us, and I prayed to god that he wasn't thinking about our little naked rendezvous just moments ago.

"But perhaps I can make it up to you," Edward continued; oblivious to my gorgeous distraction across the room. "How about later we test out your new sturdiness and stability… in a more private location?"

Jasper's jealousy and anger crippled me, but at the same time I was extremely happy. Not happy at Edward's suggestion, the thought did not appeal to me at all, but the fact that Jasper was jealous made me incredibly happy. Did he too suffer what I did when it came to him and Alice?

"Bella?" Edward asked again, snapping my out of my haze.

"Oh, sure." I said dismissively. Edward did not notice, he just smiled -obviously pleased with my answer. Edward, however, was not the only person to be pleased. Jasper's mood lightened immensely, and I wondered whether it was because he was so pleased with my hesitation over sleeping with Edward.

"OKAY!" Emmett's booming voice yelled out, "Let's get this show on the road!"

It was at this point that I finally took in the dining room.

All the furniture had been pushed to the side against the wall, and a slightly larger than usual twister mat was in the middle of the room. Well that **does** make sense, I thought to myself. A slightly larger mat, for slightly larger vampires! I also noticed that the mat's circles were further apart and the color numbers had increased and were scattered in various spots- to make it harder for us obviously. To the right of the mat was a larger than usual spinner as well. There were also vastly more choices; it wasn't the usual 'right foot- green' it had tasks like 'left pinky finger- orange!' Well… this **will **be fun! I thought to myself laughing.

"Come on love," Edward said dragging me to line up at the edge of mat. I was in between Edward and Jasper. 'Of course.' I thought to myself, 'how ironic.'

"Won't you play?" I asked Esme, noticing her sitting next to the spinner.

"No, dear," she answered motheringly. "I won the last game, so I can elect to sit out this one and spin the spinner. In other terms, I get to sit here and relax while you all squirm on a mat," she said chuckling her angelic laugh.

I laughed with her, her joy was so infectious.

"Okay rules time!" Carlisle said in a very commanding voice. "First up, Bella we'd like it if you could use your.. Uh.. 'gift' to stop all Edward's mind reading over the group, Jasper's emotional manipulation and Alice's vision over us."

There were a chorus of 'Yes, no cheating!', followed by irritable moans from both Alice, Jasper and Edward- obviously never having played without an advantage.

I concentrated once more like I had in the closet earlier. It took a lot of my strength, because I was protecting a large group from **three** vampire abilities.

When I was done I slumped to the floor exhausted. No body but Jasper seemed to notice, they were all marveling in either the silence of their minds, or their new found privacy.

"Are you okay?" Jasper asked, blowing his breath on my face. The scent alone snapped me out of my daze, and I stood up almost immediately, amazed by the power Jasper had over me.

"Yes, thank you!" I answered him simply, not daring to look into his eyes, lest I fall under his hypnotic spell.

"Thank you Bella," Carlisle continued. "The second and final rule most of you already know. You can distract other players in any way you want to get them to fall, but it can't be physical!"

"Let's try and keep it clean too," Rosalie chirped in, "No more 'pretty princess' or 'spoilt girl'" she said, giving a pointed glare at Emmett, "You know how you paid for that last time!"

"I'll be on my best behavior!" Emmett said saluting her, at which she cracked a smile.

"Okay, enough chit chat," Carlisle spoke in, "Players are you ready? Begin!"

Esme spun the giant spinner, "Right elbow- purple"

Immediately everyone scuttled onto their elbow. I expected it to be somewhat uncomfortable, but it wasn't at all! It was much too easy. Then the distractions began. I wouldn't have thought it that easy to trick and distract vampires, but we proved it possible. Emmett started.

"Oh no!!" Emmett sighed melodramatically, "Alice when you leant down you completely ripped your favorite, 1940's cashmere sweater!"

Even though it was so obviously a lie, and even though she knew the rules, Alice behaved the way she would have if the situation were real.

"What!?" She screeched, falling to the floor inspecting every inch of the cardigan. When she realized how foolish she had been, she cried out in irritation.

"I can't believe I fell for that!! But that is **so** not fair! You're not allowed to threaten the love of my life, that's completely off the book!"

Jasper's face fell at her remark and I could only imagine how he must have felt, having put up a barrier between everyone's emotions. He had just been put second in line to a cashmere sweater, he was obviously deeply hurt and it made me want to cradle him in my arms. Alice didn't seem to even notice the impact of her words as she stormed off to sit next to Esme.

"Left Elbow- Red!" The only available red circle left was on the right of me, so I turned myself over so that I was leaning on the mat tummy up. Edward had relocated himself further down next to Emmett and Jasper was leaning next to me, smiling.

"Let's make a deal," he said. "I won't distract you, if you won't distract me." He spoke barley above a whisper. Even my vampire ears struggled to hear him.

I looked at him and nodded, at which I received a wink for that made me giggle. Meanwhile I could overhear Rosalie trying to distract Emmett with dirty talk which I desperately tried to tune out.

Emmett's breathing became shallow and forced as he tried to keep his mind clear. It reminded me of the way Jasper had acted this afternoon, and when I looked back at Jasper he gave me a knowing smile, obviously thinking about it too.

Suddenly a large thump drew my attention back to Emmett and I found him sprawled across the mat, still breathing deeply with his eye's squeezed shut.

"Okay… You win… But you are **SO **doing that later!" He said, referring to something she had mentioned to get him to fall. I was actually very proud of Rosalie, she wasn't just a pretty blond with strength, she had a lot of persuasive power over people too.

Emmett joined Alice and Esme at the side, and received a playful slap from Alice, "Now see, if you hadn't distracted me I could have saved you!" Alice whispered laughing.

"Can I spin!? Can I spin!?" Emmett asked excitedly! When he received a nod from Esme he quickly flicked the spinner calling out "Right toe- Orange!"

There were two orange spots already next to my right foot, so I didn't have to move much, I just angled my body so that I was still stomach up, and pelvis up. It was a rather strange position.

"Do you mind?" Jasper asked nervously and gestured to the other orange spot next to my foot.

"Why would I mind?" I asked laughing, "This is twister! You're suppose to get twisted!"

He smiled at me and moved his right foot over my body to the other orange spot.

I realized immediately why Jasper had been so nervous to ask me; we were in a very compromising position. Jasper had his legs either side of mine, and because I was stomach up- our pelvis's were grinding together. And if I had thought the sensation of his hand grazing my breast was something, it was **nothing **compared to this! I felt my eye's roll back in my head and my strength give way. I started to fall, but I felt his iron hand catch me on the small of my back and bring me back against his body.

"I won't let you fall," He whispered into my ear.

The gesture was in fact an act of kindness, something to save me, but my body confused the action as passion and acted completely off it's own accord. My hips thrust up to meet his and he groaned because of the friction. Not even my 'ability' could stand against our emotions, so I let the barrier down between just us, and just like that; the problem I had buried so deep inside me came bursting out at the seems, swamping Jasper and I in raw want and need. As could be expected, neither of us could handle the combination our lust and we collapsed together on the mat, defeated.

"YES!" Edward yelled, oblivious to mine and Jasper's predicament. "I won, I won!"

It was at this point that I noticed that Rosalie, too, had collapsed from Edward's taunts. Fortunately no one had even noticed what had just occurred between Jasper and I. Alice and Emmett were playing X-BOX, Carlisle was whispering into Esme's ear making her giggle and Edward was still striding around the room in victory.

Jasper rolled off me and gave me a questioning stare. I felt so ashamed. I had let everything out in the open. I had thrust and lusted after my best friend's husband, a husband that I realized, I wanted more than anything I had ever wanted in the world. I jumped from mine and Jasper's tangled embrace and stood at Edward's side. I wanted to break down and cry, Edward remained oblivious to my emotions.

"So Bella," Edward asked me seductively. "How about we go and 'celebrate'?" He said winking at me. It was clear what he wanted to do, but I couldn't bring myself to do it, not now, not after my epiphany. I opened my mouth to speak but I was cut short by an angry snarl. It was Jasper's voice-

"No."

**Dun dun dunnnnnn!! Haha!! I had a lot of fun writing this chapter! **

**If I get over ten reviews for this chapter, you will get a very quick update! And trust me, you will want the next chapter!!**

**Hahahahaha! Only I know what will happen, but can I say, I have planned a great thing in my head! Lol! It's not sex yet, but don't worry they'll get there for those of you who are frustrated lol!**

**Review!!**

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	7. Release

**Have I told you guys how much I love you?**

**Hahaha**, **I loved all of your reviews. I would also like to thank all the anonymous reviewers! I really appreciate you guys reviewing even though you don't have an account. **

**Okay, as promised, the new chapter! It starts off exactly where it ended at the last chapter!**

**Oh, and one last thing; The countless amount of exclamation points -which will no doubt be in this chapter- are for you '****KiwiCantDance-x****' lol!!**

**Disclaimer:**** I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 7: Release

_I opened my mouth to speak but I was cut short by an angry snarl. It was Jasper's voice-_

"_No."_

Edward's face hardened into a menacing scowl.

_What the hell was Jasper doing?! What did he mean no? He was going to ruin everything, ruin everything before __**anything**__ had actually happened!_

Edward turned his face slowly, so that he was looking Jasper straight in the eye.

"What do you mean, no?" He asked in low, snarl.

"I mean no," Jasper stated simply. "Are there any other meanings of 'no' that I am not aware of Edward?" He asked in a smug tone.

I didn't understand what Jasper was doing. Was he **trying** to piss Edward off? I would have thought that he'd try to back peddle his words, or come up with some sort of explanation. But he and Edward were both so stupidly stubborn, that neither of them would give up.

The family had gathered around the three of us anxiously. Curious at why Jasper had reacted the way he had. None of them dared to speak up though.

I tried to intervene, "What Jasper means is-"

"Stay out of this Bella!" Edward snapped. "Go and wait for me upstairs in the bedroom."

"DON'T YOU DARE TALK TO HER LIKE THAT!" Jasper yelled, "She is not some common whore to be ordered around by you!"

Jasper was right. How dare Edward talk to me like I was some two-bit tramp. I wasn't an object of pleasure, something to be used and disposed of as he pleased. What he had said to me deeply hurt.

I moved away from behind Edward and went to stand by Jasper's side.

"What is going on between you two?" Edward asked angrily, "Are you having an affair now, is that it?!"

"Don't be ridiculous Edward!" Alice chirped in -for which I was incredibly thank full. What Edward had said was of course false. But I was thrown, because what he had said, was what I wished to be true.

"Why not!?" Edward continued his rant, "Why couldn't it be true? What other reason could Jasper have against me sleeping with my wife?"

"Well if you'd let me explain-" Jasper began,

"SHUT UP!" Edward screamed back.

"Edward please, be reasonable," Carlisle interjected. "Let Jasper explain what he meant when he said no."

Edward was silent. He wasn't happy that he had to listen, but he would listen all the same.

I was terrified. What could Jasper say? That he had felt my hesitation when Edward asked if we could have some 'private time.' Or would he tell them all about the outpouring lust he felt from me just moments ago? I prayed that it wasn't the latter.

"Well?" Edward asked Jasper, clearly impatient.

"When I said no," Jasper began. "It wasn't because I was jealous, or because I didn't want you to sleep with Bella. It was because I can feel her hunger emanating in full force form here and I thought it best to hunt again, before she explodes."

What? I thought to myself. It was true; I was a little hungry -I mean I **was** a newborn after all! But I wouldn't have exactly said I was **starving**.

The entire family stared at me, Edward's face softened.

"Is that true Isabella?" Edward asked, using my full name -as if that would prevent me lying.

I snuck a look at Jasper before answering. He was giving me a pleading expression, willing me to go along with the lie. This made me ecstatic! It **was** a lie! There was some other reason that he didn't want me to sleep with Edward. Did this mean he had feelings for me too?!

"Yes… it's true." I answered, playing along.

"Why didn't you say anything dear?" Esme asked in a soothing voice.

"I… I guess I didn't want to feel weak…" I said.

"Oh Bella!" Edward sighed taking me in his arms. "I'm so sorry for over reacting. It's just… I have you now and I don't want to lose you!"

I nodded along to his apology, smiling at him every now and then.

"Jasper, can you ever forgive me for being such a terrible brother?" He asked, at which Jasper solemnly nodded.

"We can all talk apologies after," Jasper said. "Right now I think we should get Bella into the woods… And if it's okay with you Edward, I think it's best if I take her. Just in case we come across a human scent."

Edward was very agreeable, feeling terrible for his earlier outburst. "Yes that makes perfect sense. You two can go ahead now, after all it's probably the last time you'll hunt in Forks."

Edward was right. We would be moving very soon. It had been decided before I was changed that we would move almost immediately after my change- for both the wolves and the Volturi.

"Bella?" Jasper asked, already at the door. "Are you coming?"

I skipped along until I was by Jasper's side, he winked at me.

"Be safe." Edward said, repeating those words he'd left me so many years ago. Words he'd left to such a different Bella.

I nodded at him, then ran out the door holding Jasper's hand. Mere minutes had passed before I noticed we were running deep into the forest. Deeper than my last hunt, and in a different direction.

"Where are we?" I asked curiously

"We're about an hour from Forks -driving pace, that is- it's somewhere different than last time. Further away, but I think we really need to talk -and privately, so perhaps you should put up a barrier between us and Alice's vision."

"No need," I answered calmly. "It's still up from Twister."

The truth was I was terrified. Scared of him rejecting me or telling me I was out of line for feeling the way I did.

"What… what happened back there?" He asked confused. I could feel every one of his emotions. Confusion, desire, irritation -with him, or myself I wasn't sure.

I was waiting for hatred, disgust or loathing but it never came.

But something did.

Or to be more exact, some**one** did.

It was funny, how much I could change in just a fraction of a second. But the moment the scent hit my nose, I knew it was a human. There was no way that I could control what happened next. The hideous monster inside of me reared its ugly head, pushing the real Bella deep inside. I had no control of myself anymore, I was a bystander in my own life as I watched myself run from Jasper, following it's primal instincts, hunting the scent.

"BELLA NO!" Jasper screamed, chasing after me. I wanted more than anything to obey him, but my body was stronger. Just like the way it had reacted to Jasper, It reacted to blood.

"STOP BELLA! PLEASE BELLA DON'T DO THIS!" He was yelling after me, pleading to the Bella he knew was still inside. I ignored him, running up a steep slope after the intoxicating smell. How could any of them resist? If the smell alone was this appetizing, how could they resist the blood, the taste?

It was at this point that Jasper slammed into me at full force, pinning me between his body and a large tree.

The monster snarled against him, slamming into him time after time, trying to break free. I watched helpless from my prison, I wanted to stop. I willed myself to stop but I couldn't!

"BELLA PLEASE!" Jasper yelled into my ear, "Please…come back to me.. I can't lose you like this.. Please.." He was dry sobbing into my ear, and I was completely distraught inside. I fought for the control of my body, using all my force, beating back the monster. But it was no use. The monster was stronger, it's desire for blood was stronger than my desire to be in control.

"Come back to me, come back to me" Jasper pleaded, taking my head between his hands, forcing me to look at him. "Tell me how to bring you back! Bella I know you're there! I know you're still there! If there was some way…"

I watched as something in Jasper's mind clicked. He looked at me with realization.

"Please don't hate me." He whispered.

And with that, he forced his lips against mine. At first the monster and I were completely still, thrown by this turn of events. I took this as my chance and broke free from my prison inside; my desire for Jasper was **much** stronger than the monster's desire for blood.

My mind was flying. 'He's kissing me! Jasper's kissing me!'

And then my body reacted. I opened my mouth and breathed in his heady scent. It was indescribable.

He moved his lips against mine in unfamiliar ways, it was so much different than Edward. He wasn't careful or soft, he hungrily devoured my lips as we fought for dominance. I felt his tongue brush against my lips and I moaned at the sensation. Taking his chance, he gently moved his tongue between my lips, exploring my mouth. I was going to pass out! The taste was like nothing I had ever tasted before. It was unbelievable, better than food, better than Edward, better than blood!!

Our combined emotions were going haywire -there was just too many; Relief, lust, hunger, guilt, joy, sadness. I felt my head begin to spin and the tree's in my vision began to blur.

Jasper released my lips from his. "Bella?"

My body was shaking, it was too much. Too many emotions for me to handle.

"Bella? Bella what's wrong?"

He was worrying. And that was it. It was one too many emotions.

His voice grew distant, my eye's grew heavy and then the rough ground came up to meet me…

**Pleassseee don't kill me!!**

**I will, of course, update in a day. Just to make it clear, Bella didn't really just 'pass out!' She just became overwhelmed by all the emotions and her mind sort of 'collapsed,' but do not fret, everything will be fine!**

**I feel like this chapter was kind of weird.**

**Review!**

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	8. Broken

**Hello!**

**Again, thank you to all my wonderful readers and reviewers, you're all very kind.**

**A lot of you have been asking when our favorite couple will actually BE a couple, but as I said when I first started writing; it is a slow relationship. They do realize they're feelings for each other in this chapter, but because both of them are married they're not just going to throw all their inhibitions out the window now that they've found each other. Parts of them still love their spouses, and that love doesn't just disappear because of new love. But I can't stress enough, this IS a BellaxJasper story. It will NOT end with them in canon pairings. I'm team Jasper all the way!**

**I hope that answers some of your questions, now onto the chapter!**

**It's a little sad. I got a little weepy writing the beginning, but don't crucify me! It gets better, I promise. Well Enjoy! Lol**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 8: Broken

Regret, worry, anger, sadness, guilt.

Each emotion hit me like a ton of bricks, burying me deeper within my own mind.

This was getting ridiculous.

_First, I am prisoner to my own body through my lust for blood. Now what? I was trapped within my own mind?_

Worry, guilt, worry, worry, worry, anger, worry.

There was clearly a dominant emotion being thrown at me.

Worry. Worry. Helplessness…. Love.

_Love….?_

It was there. Amongst the countless unrecognizable emotions, there was love. It was only a small flicker of light at first, but as I moved closer towards it, it grew. It turned into a ember, then a flame, then a fire. It burnt so strongly now that I struggled to look at it. But when I touched it, it didn't burn or scold my skin -it was warm and soft. It soothed every miniscule crevice in my skin, dancing within the shadows of my mind and brightening every corner.

There were no other emotions now. Just love.

My eye's shot open, and I took in a large, unnecessary breath.

"Jas…per…?" I spluttered out.

A large, blond shape ran at me and pinned me to the ground.

"Bella, Bella, Bella, Bella, Bella, Bella!" He repeated, kissing every inch of my face and neck, inhaling the scent of my skin.

"Isabella Swan! If you ever do that to me again I swear to god I'll…."

"You'll what?" I asked skeptically.

He looked at me, narrowing his eyes. Then he abruptly swung me up so that I was straddling his lap, and for the second time that day, crushed his stone cool lips onto mine.

He twisted one of his hands into my hair, securing my face to his, and pushed his free hand into the small of my back, so that every inch of our body's were touching.

This kiss was different than last time. There was a desperate edge to it, as if he thought this was the last time we'd ever touch. I wanted to expel such thoughts from his mind, and prove to him that I wanted him just as much, so I pushed my body closer to him, wrapping my legs around his hips and locking my ankles together behind his back.

The position reminded me of the way we had been on my first hunt, during our poking 'duel!' It wasn't even that long ago, and already I felt like a completely different person. The Bella then, had been carefree and boisterous, taking things as they came. She was new and unscathed and she was in love…. With Edward.

Edward!? Oh my god, Edward! What was I doing to him? What was I doing to Alice? My best friend! I felt like I was ripped into pieces, I was broken.

Jasper pulled away from my lips and muffled his face into my shoulder. His breathing became erratic and deep, as his body shook with sadness.

"I know you feel it too.." he struggled out, "I know you're in love with me too, please tell me that you love me… please.. Please."

He was crying. And I was distraught.

"… I … I mean.." I tried to say,

"You do!" He cried out, "I know you do, you love me! You just can't say it because of Edward. Let me show you, let me show you that I love you!"

He pushed me down so that he was lying on top of me, then he began to tear at my clothing.

"Jasper please." I asked softly, "Don't do this, not here, not like this."

I **did** want him, more than I had ever wanted anything before. But I couldn't do it. Not to my family, or to myself.

Jasper's hands stopped trying to rid my body of clothing, as he stared down at them.

"What am I doing…" He whispered, crushed.

I grabbed his torso within my arms and cradled his head against my chest. He wrapped his strong arms around my waist and sobbed into my shirt as I murmured into his ear repeatedly, "I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you."

And it was the truth, I **did** love him. And I knew that he loved me, but I also knew that parts of us were still in love with our spouses -and it was that fact that cut us both so deeply.

I had no idea how long we sat there, but at some point the sun had set, and mine and Jasper's synchronistic sobs, turned into nothing more than a soft shake.

Jasper pulled his head from my chest and rested his chin on the top of my head.

"What are we going to do?" He asked simply, "Do we just go back to the family and pretend like nothing ever happened, do we just bury the feelings-"

"No!" I practically screamed out.

He chuckled a low laugh, but it wasn't that of a joyous man.

"I don't want to either. But if we show up at the house and just blurt out 'oh yeah we went hunting…and now we're in love' I think the only emotion we're likely to incense is anger." He said.

In spite of myself, I smiled.

"Well…" I said shyly, "who said we had to actually tell anyone about it right now?"

"What do you mean?" He asked, clearly confused.

"I don't know, it's just… well we could still… but you know… actually not…"

"What **are** you trying to say Bella?" Jasper laughed, lightening the mood.

I looked down, not daring to look him in the eyes. I'm sure he could feel my embarrassment at full force.

"Well… we could keep it our secret…"

"Why is that so embarrassing?" He asked, still smiling.

"Oh come on!" I said, "I sound like an immature teenager, 'let's keep a secret'" I whined, mocking myself.

He laughed and tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

"Please don't try to impersonate yourself again, you **really** can't pull it off." He said joking.

He looked into my eyes, then asked "so how's this going to work?"

I cleared my throat, preparing to ask my next question.

"You love me, don't you?"

"Of course I do! You shouldn't even ask me that!"

"Ok… and I love you too. More than anyone, or anything in my life…. More than Edward."

He smiled larger than I'd ever seen him before, and this time it reached his eyes. He kissed me quick and softly on my lips before saying,

"Go on."

"So you could wait for me… right? Not long, perhaps a few weeks after we move, just to give them some time."

He nodded his head slowly, letting it sink in.

"And do we… I mean will we ... Uh.. be 'together' during this time?" He asked nervously.

I pondered this question for a while. My heart ached to be with Jasper, in every aspect, but if I wanted to give myself to him fully, I would want to do it with a clean conscience. **After** we'd told every one about us.

"I don't think I could. Even what we're doing now makes me feel guilty. I'm not sure I would be able to handle anything more…"

He put a finger to my lips.

"Then we'll wait."

I smiled at him.

Edward, Jacob, neither of them had meant any where near as close to me as what Jasper meant.

But I was scared. Not of our love, or our relationship, but of 'coming out' per sè. How could I break Edward's heart, when he was responsible for bringing me so close to Jasper? Edward had brought me into immortality, and as such an eternity with Jasper. Would he be able to handle me leaving him, would he get violent? What was most frightening was the fact that I knew I **wasn't** being irrational. Edward had behaved so crazy when he suspected Jasper of I of having an affair, what would he do when he found out it was true?

"Bella, please don't stress. Everything will be fine."

I looked into his eyes and I absolutely believed him.

"Now onto simpler topics," he began, "Shall we go and bloody you up?"

I just stared at him, mouth agape.

"What!?" I asked laughing.

"Well, if I'm not mistaken, I believe the reason we **actually** came out here was for you to hunt. And seeing as last time you came back covered in blood, if you don't this time… it may be misconstrued as suspicious."

I laughed at him again.

"Then let's go get me a bear!"

We ran through the forest holding hands. I was now nice and bloody, though not as much as last time, it was still believable. Jasper had splatters of blood on himself as well -having taken a quick snack while he was there. Every time I looked at Jasper, he would pull a ridiculous face just to make me laugh.

It was odd to think that we had been sobbing together on the forest floor just hour's ago. Right now I had clarity, contentment. I was happy.

We neared closer to the house and released each other's hands.

As we walked into the living room, we were met with a solemn sight. Rosalie and Alice were holding each other rocking slowly on the floor. Carlisle was holding Esme in his arms, who was clearly very upset. Emmett appeared to be studying something on the desk, making notes every now and then.

Edward walked up slowly to Jasper and I, he was angry.

"We need to talk," He whispered out.

**Don't kill me, I know I have a thing for cliffies. **

**If any of you can guess what has just happened, you will get an honorable mention in the next chapter! Lol!**

**Please review, it inspires me to write ergo quicker updates lol!**

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	9. Fight or Flight?

**Hello, Hello!**

**I will start by saying how much I loved all your reviews and theories on why the family was upset, but……**

**You're all just too smart!! Haha! Five of you got it right, so here's a big shout out to:**

**-Ellabobella**

**-ObsessedwithJamesPotter**

**-Lilliumkiss**

**-Isabella Whitlock Hale**

**-Bellawish2be**

**You guys are all very smart. Hehe, I wanted to trick you, but it didn't really work lol! And thank you to all the reviewers who didn't get it right, some of you had some really good theories that I could have used for the situation.**

**One more thing, Bella's 'abilities' don't last forever. She needs to re boot them every now and again if she wants them to last, but the barrier WAS up while her and Jasper were hunting because he reminded her about it. Even if she thinks about her barriers they become stronger, because she grows stronger. But I'll stop talking now, onto the story. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

_Chapter 9: Fight or Flight?_

"_We need to talk."_

They knew, it was the only explanation, I must have let down the barrier between us when I 'passed out.' They knew.

Almost every fiber of my being was screaming at me to run. Run now and avoid the entire situation all together. But there was one part of myself, perhaps the strongest part, which told me to stay and see it through.

It was my heart.

Though it was still and cold now, it belonged to Jasper. And I would not leave him here alone to deal with the ramifications of what we had began together.

"Perhaps we should sit down now?" Edward asked in a slightly softer tone.

He was still just as angry. Both Jasper and I could feel it emanating off him in waves, but there was another emotion, hidden beneath the anger. It was worry.

We moved over to the chaise lounge holding hands. If they knew about us now, there was no point in trying to hide it.

"Alice, perhaps you'd better assist here?" Edward asked.

Oh no. My mind was screaming. They're going to ambush us, force us to stay apart some how. But I couldn't think like that. I **wouldn't**. There was no existing force, man or vampire, that could keep us apart.

Alice moved to sit next to Edward and slumped down on the seat. There was no impish prance to her step, she was upset. **I** was upset. How could I have done this to her? My best friend. I should have at least had the decency to tell her to her face, not let her find out through a vision. Jasper squeezed my hand tightly.

"Ssshhh" He whispered softly in my ear, "I don't think it's what you think it is."

Edward cleared his throat and pinched the bridge of his nose. When he had calmed himself down a little he spoke.

"Earlier today, Alice had a vision."

What was Jasper saying? Of course they knew!

"…She had a vision that the.." He sighed loudly, "that the Volturi were coming."

My mind simultaneously sighed in relief and screamed in terror.

"The.. The Volturi?" I stuttered out, Jasper squeezed my hand again. "H.. how? When?"

"Soon." Alice whispered quietly. "And that's not all," she continued, "I see them say that they're taking you with them…"

"What!?" I asked flabbergasted.

Edwards emotions suddenly surged up in anger again. I understood. He wasn't angry because he had found out about Jasper and I, he was angry because he was worried.

"I don't know!" Alice cried out, distraught. "It keep's changing, but it always ends with them saying the same thing, 'She's coming with us.'"

Jasper suddenly stood, throwing the large wooden coffee table across the room, turning it into splinters.

"NO!" He screamed.

The family and Edward stared at Jasper questionably. Edward was my **husband** and he wasn't behaving like this. Realizing what it must have looked like, Jasper quickly began a rant about the principals of family.

"It just isn't right," he spat out angrily, "We're finally a family! Edwards finally has… a wife." He struggled out, keeping up pretence. "I won't let the Volturi come down and screw it up!"

Alice slumped into her hands sobbing. Jasper walked over to her and put his arms around her tiny figure. I didn't mean to, but unintentionally I sent a huge wave of jealousy at Jasper, to which he turned around and gave me an apologetic look.

"Alice, I need to know everything. Tell me everything that you see." I asked refocusing.

She brought up her head from her hands and stared at me in the eyes,

"Well," she coughed out. "I see Edward, Carlisle and Emmett sitting in the lounge room deciding when and how it would be best to move. Rose and I are upstairs packing away some of our belongings, and Esme is packing up some of your stuff, Bella."

I nodded, not wanting to interrupt her.

"Then I see them, coming up the drive way and walking through the door. Though it's not all of them. Only Aro and Marcus come, along with a few members of the guard; Jane, Demetri and Felix."

I was unsure of some of the vampires she had just mentioned, but I let her continue nonetheless.

"Then Aro speaks. He says that they've come to check that your change went well and also… that they've decided to test the extent of your powers in Italy." Her hands were shaking, "When we tell them no, they tell us we have no choice and if Bella doesn't agree to come, Jane will torture every member of the family slowly… starting with Esme."

Carlisle let out a low growl and the anger pouring out of him was pure and strong.

The Volturi had played their cards just right. They knew that what I cared about more than anything was my family, so they would torture them until I gave in, starting with my mother.

"Wait a minute Alice," Jasper asked curiously. "Where am I and Bella during this vision?"

Alice's face colored over with realization, "I don't know…. You weren't there."

My mind suddenly clicked.

"Oh don't you see Alice!? Your vision didn't factor either Jasper or I in it because I had the barrier up between us!"

Alice experienced two things then, clarity and confusion.

"Why would you put up a barrier between my vision and you and Jasper?"

Crap. I hadn't thought to explain that. What would I say?

"..Oh.. Because.. Well you see.." I tried desperately to think of a plausible reason. "I'm still a little self conscience about my hunting skills and I didn't exactly want you all to see me slaughtering another animal.." I put my head between my hands for added effect, "I'm sorry."

Alice seemed to feel terrible for asking, "No, I'm sorry Bella. All that matters now is that the vision may change! We may have a chance! Let down the barrier now, so I can see."

I nodded at her, then let the barrier fall between us.

"What do you see?" I asked curiously.

Alice's eyes glazed over. Her face read no expression or feeling and her emotions were the same. Suddenly she smiled a small smile. It started to grow as she saw further into the vision.

"Ha!" She said breaking the vision and looking back at the family.

"Bella you're a genius," she said running over to me and kissing my forehead.

"Why, what did I do?" I asked, wiping the venom from my head where she had kissed me a little too enthusiastically.

"Oh it's brilliant," she began to explain, "The Volturi of course don't know your power, hence the reason for their little visit. And when you say no to them, they try torturing the family -but of course they can't because you're protecting us all!"

Carlisle turned to face me and whispered, "Thank you. Its one very convenient gift you have."

You have no idea. I thought to myself.

"But Alice," I asked confused, "Isn't there some other way we could deal with this all, without the Volturi having to come Forks -especially so close to the move."

Alice looked at me again, then her eye's glazed over once more.

"That's a great idea Bella!" She said, snapping out of her vision, and obviously seeing some suggestion I would make before I had even thought about it.

"It might actually work," Edward agreed, seeing the vision in Alice's mind.

"Okay, for those of us that can't read minds or see the future, care to explain?" Rosalie asked, speaking up for the first time.

Alice turned to face the rest of the family.

"Bella had a suggestion, she suggests that we don't let them come here. But that **we** go **there.**"

"Oh right," Jasper said sarcastically. "The second largest coven of vampires known -that happen to threaten the first biggest- and we just wander into Italy, unannounced."

"Pfftt," Alice dismissed Jasper's comment. "Not all of us will go, just Edward and Carlisle."

"Edward!?" I asked worried, He may no longer be the love of my life, but I still cared about him immensely.

"I'll be fine, don't stress." Edward replied kissing me on the lips.

There was a surge of jealousy, a dull crunch and I looked over to find that Jasper had snapped the second coffee table in half.

"What is wrong with you Jasper?" Edward asked incredulously, "You're acting very strange."

"Oh well forgive me if I'm not stressed about the fact that my father and my brother are going into the vampire capital unprotected!" He replied sarcastically, and with that he ran back out into the door and into the surrounding forest.

"Well I feel like a jerk." Edward said simply.

"It's not just you," Alice said soothingly, "He's been weird around me too. Maybe I should talk to him… but I just have so much to decide, the Volturi, the move.. Ugh."

"I'll go," I said, trying to seem helpful. The truth was I needed to speak to him, he was losing all control -how would he handle anything else, if the simple gesture of Edward trying to comfort me caused him to break a table?

"Thank you Bella," Alice said, giving me a quick hug before divulging more information from her vision, to an eager family.

I skipped out the back door, trying to appear calm, before running full speed into the forest, following Jasper's scent.

It didn't take long to find him, or more accurately, for him to find me.

"I'm sorry.." He said, grabbing my hand and kissing it.

I quickly pulled away from him, at which I received a strong blow of sadness and rejection from him.

"I'm sorry" I mouthed, "barriers down."

He understood and nodded, as I reinforced my abilities once more. When I was done I moved back over to stand next to him.

"Jasper you need to control yourself!" I whispered acidly, "That was twice! They could have found out!"

"I don't care!" He shouted grabbing me into his arms and forcing me to kiss him, "I hate that he gets to touch you, I hate that he has seen and touched parts of you that I could only dream of…. HA," he said laughing, "I couldn't **even** dream it!"

"I know.." I said, trying to calm him. "But hey, he'll be in Italy soon and then there's no touching **or** looking from his side!" I said, covering my eye's with my hands, trying to make him laugh.

It worked, he chuckled a soft laugh and then pulled me back into his arms, kissing me deeply.

"I will count down the seconds until I can call you mine…" He said, inhaling the scent of my hair.

"You can do that right now," I said laughing, "just not out loud.."

He laughed again, then sighed.

"I suppose we should get back to them, they're probably wondering what's taking so long…"

I smiled at him, "I am forever your's, you know that right? I know it may be hard, considering my rough record… but I'm not going to turn around and go back to Edward… you don't have to worry."

He stared into my eye's and pushed my hair behind my ear. Then whispered into my ear,

"I have loved you long before I truly knew you…"

If I had been able to, I would have cried. His words were so touching. Looking into his eyes I knew I had found what I had always been searching for. The person who would stick by me through the good and the bad. Someone who would treat me like an equal, and love me like I so desperately wished to be loved,

_My soul mate…_

**Aawww! And this is why the BellaxJasper couple is just so much better than the BellaxEdward…. Because it just is!**

**If you want to know what happens next, you know what to do!**

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**Ew. It rhymed?**

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	10. Physical

**Hello for the tenth time!**

**Your reviews were all very kind. Another shout out to all the anonymous reviewers, thank you for taking the time to read and review. I can't thank you via email like I do the others, so this is my gratitude to you!**

**Happy tenth chapter! I'm trying to get to one hundred reviews, ten per chapter.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: No, I don't own Twilight.**

Chapter 10: Physical

We lay together on the hard, soggy ground for what felt like hours, but was more likely mere minutes.

Jasper's hands were continually running up my spine, tracing patterns on the bare flesh he found. My face was nestled into the crook of his neck, inhaling as much of his scent as I could.

He let out a deep, low sigh.

"We should probably head back to the house now. We've still got to pack and decide who's going when and how…"

I knew what I was about to say would sound like a petulant child, but it slipped out anyway,

"No. I don't want to, you can't make me."

He chuckled a deep, throaty laugh and kissed the top of my head.

"I don't want to either, in fact, I think I would be plenty happy if I could spend the rest of my eternity here, But…"

"Nope. No buts. The first half of that sentence sounded good enough to me, let's go with that."

I was being stubborn and foolish, but I didn't want to go back and have to feign remorse and sadness for Edward's departure. While I was concerned for his safety, I was also incredibly excited to have time with Jasper -without Edward. Alice would of course still be there, but I was beginning to think that was a good thing. I often found my mind playing out scenario's in which Jasper and I would betray, so to speak, our "no 'physical' togetherness" rule. I knew the rule had been implemented for a just cause, but right now the reason escaped me.

"Come on," Jasper said, hoisting me to my feet. "If Alice has another vision and we're, oh so conveniently, not in it -They may get suspicious."

"Right, I should probably take the barrier down now.. I mean it's not like we're actually…. Doing anything… physical that is…" I was babbling as my mind played out more rule breaking scenarios between Jasper and I. _Jasper pushing me against a wall, Jasper kissing the life out of me, slowly undressing each other…_

_No! _I shouted to myself, _There was a reason! You may not be able to remember it right now under your current circumstances, but there __**was**__ a reason._

_But was it a good reason? _The lustful part of my mind countered

_Of course it was a good reason! _The logical half replied, _If it wasn't a good reason you never would have enforced the rule would you?_

My mind had me there. Dammit. The truth was I was actually hoping that the lustful part of my brain would have a reason good enough for me to give in_. Stupid… hormone driven… uncreative half.._ I muttered to myself.

"Bella please," Jasper said, breaking me out of my mind's argument. "I may not be a mind reader, but I can tell you're thinking on something pretty hard. Your emotions are bouncing of each other like nothing I've ever felt before; confusion, denial…. And can I say quite a large amount of lust," he said, cracking a smile at the end.

And now embarrassment was added to the pile too. I thought to myself, mortified at what I was about to say.

"Well.. I was just thinking… you know that whole… 'non physical' thing we put into place.. I was just kind of wondering.. Uh… what the reason for that was. Not that I wanted to break it or anything," I said in a rush, "I was just wondering is all…"

"Oh." He replied, eye's wide. "Oh.. Oh. Uh, well I think.. I **think** we put that into place, because you said you wouldn't be able to handle the guilt... Not that I would have pressured you or I wouldn't have felt guilty.. I would have!!" He said, nearly shouting, and scuffing his shoes against the dirt, eyes down.

I almost burst out laughing. He must have felt my sudden change in emotion, because he looked up, confused.

"What?" He asked curiously.

"Well listen to the two of us!" I said laughing, "we sound like little teenagers having the dreaded 'sex talk'."

We looked at each other silent for a moment, then simultaneously, burst out laughing. After both of us had been thoroughly tired out, Jasper took my hands in his.

"What will be will be. We can't plan for these things, if they happen, they happen. But let's not put any pressure on ourselves, if and when it happens, we'll deal."

"Okay." I said softly, "let's head back."

We took of running back the way we had came. When we neared closer to the house, I relinquished the barrier between us and Alice's vision. Jasper let go of my hand, and we walked into the house together very casually, changing our emotions to a lighter, more casual feeling.

"You're back!" Alice almost screamed, "I absolutely **have** to tell you the new plan, it's flawless! The Volturi won't be able to touch you Bella."

I nodded along, seemingly very interested in what Alice had to say, while truthfully having the strongest desire to run upstairs and bathe myself. I was still nice and bloody from my previous hunt with Jasper… after our first kiss. The thought made me giddy, and I soon found myself replaying the scenario in my mind;

"_If there was some way I could bring you back…"_

"Bella!" Alice screeched, "are you even listening to me?!"

"Oh, sorry Alice. I kind of zoned… Look guy's do you mind if I go shower, then we talk battle plan? Both Jasper and I are still really filthy from the hunt, and I'd really appreciate a nice long clean. I still haven't quite had a chance to come down from the initial Volturi shock."

"I second that idea." Jasper said, sending me a wave of lust. I was unsure if it was intentional or not, but it left me struggling to stand up right.

"Oh.. Of course," Alice said apologetically. "Just come down when you're ready, we'll just be talking strategy."

Both Jasper and I nodded and turned to run upstairs, but Edward grabbed my hand.

"This may be one of the last times I see you before I go, do you think you need some 'help' in the shower?" He said -voice thick with innuendo.

I felt two things then; the strongest urge to run far from the 'help' of Edward, and a stab of hatred and jealousy from Jasper, whose breathing had become low and forced from his anger.

I just looked at Edward, unsure of how to phrase my answer.

"You know that I'd …_love_… to," I struggled out, resisting the urge to shiver, "But really, what I need right now is a good clean.. And I don't think what you suggested will result in a thorough scrub.."

He was displeased with my answer, but he seemed to believe it.

"Okay then. Can I have a kiss instead?" He asked hopefully.

I could hardly refuse **that** request. I prayed that Jasper wasn't watching as I leant in, intending to give him a quick peck on the lips. But the second my lip's touched his, he leant in and held my face to his, pushing his tongue into my mouth. The feeling almost made me gag, as I struggled not to push him roughly from me. He moved his tongue in a jerking motion, seeming to enjoy it and hoping I would too. I was suddenly overcome with a crippling amount of sadness as I heard Jasper run from our presence up the stairs.

I pushed Edward's face from mine.

"I don't think your family exactly want's to see this." I almost spat at him.

I didn't even wait to see his reaction, instead I bolted up the stairs after Jasper. How could I have let Edward kiss me like that in front of the man I claimed to love? It was despicable and inexcusable. I was so used to feeling other's emotions, that the intensity of my own shocked me, as I struggled to compose myself. How could I have done this? And worse yet, I allowed Edward to see what his affect on me was; revulsion, anger.

I should have been more careful, careful to control myself and my emotions. Now the entire family knew that some thing had changed, Alice would be careful to keep an eye out now… Alice. As I remembered my sister, I also remembered that my barriers were currently down, I quickly built them back up, wary to allow Alice to see much more than she already had. I had to find Jasper, the blow of sadness I had felt from him was incredibly strong and I needed to try and make amends.

I could hear the shower running in his and Alice's bathroom -he was most likely just standing around in the bathroom with the water running, so I assumed it a good place to find him. I walked over cautiously to his bedroom door and knocked. No answer. I pried it open and stepped in softly. Various bits of furniture had been chucked around the room, fortunately none were broken. I quickly put everything back to where I thought it belonged and moved over to the bathroom.

"Jasper? Can I come in?"

There was silence for a few seconds, then I heard his husky voice.

"Uh…I don't think you should."

"I was just being polite Jasper, I'm coming in anyway."

"Really Bella," he said distracted, "You shouldn't come in, not yet."

What was wrong with him? I couldn't **not** kiss Edward! It wasn't my fault Edward had behaved the way he had, and it's not like I asked Jasper to watch.

I pushed the bathroom door open roughly, breaking the door knob, But I was completely unprepared for the sight that awaited me. Jasper was standing in the shower, water dripping in his hair and cascading down his skin -He was completely naked. Driven by stupid my body's stupid instinct, I threw myself at Jasper. Stepping in to the shower and kissing him, not unlike the way Edward had just kissed me.

"Uh… Be…Bella!" Jasper said against my mouth.

"Oh my god!" I screamed, pulling myself off Jasper, realizing what I had done. I ran from the bathroom -and a very confused Jasper- and hid myself in the closet, completely ashamed of what I had just done.

I heard a soft knock at the closet door.

"Bella, honey, can I come in?" Came Jasper's soothing voice.

"No, god, go away! I don't want to see you." I replied, mortified.

I heard a soft laugh from the other side of the door,

"Well you know I was only being polite, I'm coming in anyway." He said, mimicking the words I had used just moments ago.

The door creaked open a smidgen, and in stepped Jasper, covered by only a small towel.

"Aaaghh!" I whined out, "the towel isn't actually helping things!"

He laughed, then sat down next to me on the floor.

"…So.." He started, "I guess we're even now with the whole 'seeing each other naked' thing." He said laughing.

I, however, was not laughing. I buried my head in my hands, ruing the day I was ever born.

"Please don't feel like that…" He said, brushing his fingers through my hair. "If anything I find it a compliment that a goddess like you would find me attractive!"

The words were so familiar, and I realized that it was what I had said to him when I first came out of the change and caught him staring at me.

"Are you just going to use all **my** lines today?" I said, only half joking.

"Well it's just they were all so good!" He said, cracking a smile.

Jasper's happiness was so infectious that I smiled too.

"I'm sorry for kissing Edward." I said solemnly, "or more exact, let him kiss me."

"You couldn't not," He answered simply.

"But you were so sad, I could feel it coming of in tons."

"Of course I was sad," Jasper said, staring at me questionably, "The woman I loved was being kissed, or more accurately; eaten, by another man. I can't help how I feel- Just how I act. So I came upstairs and took out my anger on the furniture. I decided all I needed was a shower to clear my head… but then you came in, and …well you know the rest…"

"Right." I said, looking down. "Sorry about that."

He laughed, "Uh… this is just a guy thing.. I mean you don't **have** to answer obviously…. But, uh.. Did I measure- not a good word- was my body as 'attractive'.. As Edward?"

I burst out laughing. Men were such odd creatures.

"You two didn't even compare," I said, still laughing.

He looked down, embarrassed and upset, and I realized how he must have took my words.

"No, no, no! I didn't mean it like that!" I said almost yelling, "What I meant was Edward has nothing on you. I don't know if it's because I never really took the time to notice him, maybe it was because I was human…or because… maybe because I love you more… but you were more beautiful than anyone **I've **ever seen.." I said mumbling off, embarrassed.

He moved his hand to the back off my neck and kissed me softly.

"Thank you. That meant a lot to me." He whispered into my ear.

I looked back into his eyes.

"You have meant more to me than anything I have ever known, in my life and **un**life." I said smiling.

He kissed my forehead, then my nose and my lips.

"Well," He said clearing his throat, then he looked deep into my eyes before continuing.

"Shall we go shower?"

**Haha, little bit of fluff! **

**Not really much to say… Just try and get me to 100 reviews!**

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	11. Suspicion

**Yay!**

**I got to one hundred reviews, thanks so much guys! **

**I'd like to issue a formal apology to EdwardsKitten for not putting in an incredibly detailed description of Jasper naked, my condolences for your suffering ; )**

**This is a very short Authors note because.. Well really there just isn't much to say except,**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

Chapter 11: Suspicion

What I wanted more than anything was to say yes to Jasper, go with him now into the shower and never come out. I wanted to listen to the lustful half of my brain and just give in to temptation, but the stupid logical part was shouting to me loud and clear.

_You can't go shower with him, what are you crazy!? The entire family is downstairs! Just because you can put a barrier between Alice and you, doesn't mean that a physical barrier will erupt around you and Jasper, making you unseen to the rest of them!_

_Oh, will you just shut up for once? _The lustful part countered, _It's her body she can do what she likes with it._

Ugh. The lustful half was right, I **could** do what I liked, but I wasn't going to. The logical half had made a good argument; any one from the family members could walk in, especially since I had broken the door knob.

"Bella?" Jasper asked, breaking my internal debate. "You coming?"

"Eeehhh….. I don't think I should," I managed to push out of my unwilling mouth. "Any one of them could walk in at any moment."

Jasper sighed, incredibly melodramatically.

"Well, if that's what you want… I guess I'll just have to clean all those hard to reach places myself…" He said, winking at me.

I whined loudly, then ran from Jasper's presence -afraid of how much self control I had left.

I ran up a level, to mine and Edward's bathroom and turned on the shower. Hot steam soon filled the entire bathroom and I struggled to see through it. I groaned inwardly when I realized there weren't any towels in the bathroom, and I ran at vampire speed down the stairs and to the linen closet.

As I grabbed a couple of cashmere towels, something caught my attention downstairs in the living room. I could hear faint voices whispering that even my vampire hearing struggled to make out. I managed to discern two voices speaking to each other. It was Edward and Alice.

"_I just don't know what's going on with him.." _came Alice's small voice, "_He hasn't even really been acknowledging my existence since the change. I think the first time he touched me was when I was upset over the Volturi coming for Bella."_

"_There something else…" _Edward's voice replied, _"Jasper… well he's been thinking some pretty weird things. Nothing too serious, I just see flashes of Bella every now and again. In particular he likes to replay her first hunt."_

Crap. Crap, crap, crap, crap. What had Jasper been thinking? Is that why Edward had been acting a little possessive around me lately?

"_That is weird.." _Alice spoke, giving me a blow of confusion. _"I know they've grown closer and everything since her change, but I expected that. Jasper knows so much about newborns I knew he'd be able to Bella so much with the transition. But maybe… well maybe he's grown sort of infatuated with her."_

How dare she?! He wasn't simply infatuated with me, he was in love with me. We were in love. And I was beginning to really struggle keeping it a secret.

I heard a low sigh coming from what I assumed was Edward.

"_I don't know what to do… maybe Jasper should come with Carlisle and I to Italy, Help him get Bella out of his system. But we have to stop worrying. If something was going on between the two of them we'd know, you'd have a vision, or they'd slip up. I think it's just a case of a friendship going a little too far."_

Alice didn't say anything to that so I assumed she must have merely nodded or something.

"_Come one then, let's get the others back inside now. We've still got to pack up the entire house __**and**__ explain the plan to both Jasper and Bella. Where are they anyway, I know they're both in different showers because I can hear the water running, but really! How long does it take?"_

I rushed back to the bathroom, eager to get away from the voices. I stepped into the shower mechanically, unaware of what was actually going on around me. Was Jasper going to have to go to Italy too? I was so looking forward to having the extra time with him. But I couldn't handle the stress any longer. We had to tell the others, the guilt was eating away at me. As I washed away the blood and dirt from my skin, I made a decision. We would tell them when Edward returned from Italy. We had to.

I stepped out of the warmth from the shower and toweled myself dry. When I had dried my hair and tied it back loosely, I stepped out of the comforts of the small bathroom and into the bedroom. Alice -I assumed- had lay out an outfit for the day. I slipped it on quickly, not really taking the time to notice what it was, or how it looked and I skipped downstairs.

Jasper was already in the dining room with the others, fully clothed this time and toweling his hair off.

"Good Bella, You're here. We can explain it all to the both of you. Please, come sit." Edward said, gesturing to the dining room table where the entire family was seated around several maps and notes. I took the only available seat next to Esme and Jasper, then looked up to Edward, willing him to continue.

"Okay, as you know, thanks to your suggestion Alice saw in her vision, We are going to go to Italy to stop the Volturi coming here."

I nodded along, not speaking up.

"Not all of us are going of course, we've decided only myself, Carlisle and Jasper will go." I felt Jasper rear up next to me, clearly unaware of the change in plans till now. I sent him a wave of drossiness, hoping he would stay down so that I could speak.

"Uh Edward," I began, "I don't think it's a good idea if Jasper goes with you."

Edward and Alice briefly exchanged looks then both looked at me.

"Why is that?" Alice asked, allowing a little bit of venom to seep through her words.

I sighed loudly and looked down at my hands, preparing to act out my next part. I knew what I was about to say would be both true and make sense, but I couldn't risk Jasper telling Edward anymore through his mind than he already had. I quickly and silently built up a wall between Jasper's thoughts and Edward's mind.

"I didn't want to have to tell you this…" I said nervously, "But something happened the other day, on my second hunt.."

Jasper looked at me confused, clearly not understanding if I was about to tell them about us.

"Yes…" Edward said, "Go on…"

"I… well.. I came across a human scent."

Six different gasps were heard around the room. Jasper looked at me smiling, clearly understanding where I was going with this.

"Why didn't you tell us Bella?" Carlisle asked in his fatherly tone.

"As I said, I was hoping that I wouldn't have to. I was ashamed at how I had behaved and I didn't want any of you finding out…. I also asked Jasper to try not to think about it too much. I asked him if he could think of my first hunt more, so that Edward might think it happened the same way the second time around," I blurted out, weaving a huge web of lies around a tiny morsel of truth.

Edward suddenly turned to face Alice, and I was sure she had said something in her mind like; 'so that was the reason.'

Edward turned back to face me and squeezed my hand.

"So what happened?" he asked, concerned.

"Well.. I sort of lost all control. It was like I wasn't even in charge of my body anymore. I ran away from Jasper fast, following the scent, but Jasper was fast too, and he managed to pin me to a tree.."

The entire family was leaning in, listening intently. Even Rosalie was looking at me wide eyed, as if she would burst into tears at any moment.

"Jasper just kept talking to me, he said he knew that I was still inside somewhere and that I had to come back.. And then.."

Jasper squeezed my other hand tightly and sent me a wave of love.

"…And then I just came back to him. It was hard but I managed to beat the monster back."

The whole family was just staring at me, mouths agape. I felt a various amount of emotions coming from each of them; pride, concern, admiration.

"Good on you bro!" Emmett said, hitting Jasper on the back, "You beat the Bella monster back, a task never before conquered by man **or** vampire!" He said laughing.

I smiled at Emmett, then continued.

"So… I don't really think I trust myself without Jasper around. So if it's okay with everyone… could Jasper stay?"

They all nodded enthusiastically.

"Of course Bella, I wouldn't dream of taking him with us now after hearing that." Edward said earnestly.

I nodded at him softly and said, "Thank you."

I also felt a large wave of gratitude come from Jasper and he mouthed the words thank you to me too.

"Okay," Alice said moving on. "Onto the rest of the plan!"

"So just Edward and Carlisle will fly to Italy. There they will tell the Volturi that Bella will not be coming, nor will she join their guard. Now I've seen that Aro will get quite upset over this, but once Carlisle explains Bella's ability to protect, they calm down a little."

I nodded at her, wondering where the rest of us factored into the plan.

"Meanwhile, in the small town of Forks," Alice said, cracking a smile. "A lustrous, beautiful family of vampires will be preparing for their big move. Now in light of recent events, I propose that Bella and Jasper leave first, taking one car with them. This will ensure that Bella does not bump into any more humans, as we will have quite a few delivery men helping to load everything."

What? I thought to myself.

"But Alice, We're vampires! Surely we'd be a lot quicker than humans?"

"That's true Bella, but it's all about keeping up pretences. When you have a secret like we do, you do everything you can to ensure it doesn't get out."

I nodded then looked over at Jasper. Her words had described perfectly how I had felt about our secret. I found Jasper looking at me too, so I gave him a wink, making him smile.

"So you two will arrive at the house first," she said continuing. "And the first thing you should probably do is hunt. It will be a while till the rest of us get there, so take something to amuse yourselves."

I laughed inwardly at what we could do to entertain ourselves.

"Okay," Alice said finishing up.

"Troops! let's move out!"

**Okay, so next chapter the move. Should be fun, lol!**

**Make my day and review! Also any suggestions for the story are greatly appreciated.**

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	12. The Move

**Ugh!**

**I am writing this author's note after four attempts of uploading this chapter! It's why it took a little longer to be posted. **

**Stupid… unreliable… internet connection! Any way fourth time's the charm!**

**Any who, this chapter finally actually has a bit of M in it. "Yes! Finally!" I hear some of you say. Not too much, but I couldn't put in under any other rating. Even though the actual "act" -lol- isn't in this chapter, it is enough to earn it's rating haha ; )**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

Chapter 12: The Move

Two and a half hours later we were still packing up.

We were vampires! A simple job like this wasn't suppose to take this long.

I had long ago packed up the few possessions I held in the house, and was now waiting anxiously for the other's to do the same…

'Others' probably wasn't the right word……. 'Jasper' was.

It wasn't unreasonable. **Jasper** was the one driving with me, I had every right to wish he would hurry up more than the rest… or at least that's what I was trying to convince myself. Truthfully I couldn't wait to be alone in the car with him. No more whispering below vampire senses, no more hiding. I could put up the block between Alice's vision and us, then we could do what we please.

A chill ran through my spine at this thought. But it wasn't caused by just the prospect of finally being able to be.. Uh.. 'physical' with Jasper, but rather the notion that now we could talk about what ever we pleased, we wouldn't have to censor our conversations, always living in fear that the wrong thing might slip out.

Two smooth, marble arms wrapped around my waist from behind me -and for a split second I imagined they were Jasper's.

"I have to go now, love." Came Edward's soft voice in my ear.

I nodded, still not facing him.

When he didn't say anything, I assumed he hadn't seen my nod and so I voiced my answer.

"…Okay then," I whispered in false depression, sending him a wave of concern to add credibility.

He kissed from my neck to my ear lobe, then spun me around and kissed me on my lips. For the second time since my change, I was incredibly grateful that Jasper was not anywhere near.

He pulled away from my lips and rested his forehead against mine.

"Seven days." He breathed out in a solemn tone. "I shall count down the minutes till I'm back in your arms…"

I nodded again, not able to trust my own voice. Little did Edward know that when he returned, he'd wish he never had. Jasper and I **would** tell them after seven days, and in doing so; break more than one heart.

He closed his eyes and just stood there, holding me and breathing in deeply.

It occurred to me how greatly these seven days differed in meaning to the both of us. For Edward, it was hell on earth. For me, it was paradise. Not because of Edward's absence per se, but rather it meant a little more privacy for Jasper and I. An old saying my mother use to say came to mind; One man's hell is another man's heaven. How fitting it was for our current situation.

Edward's emotions were so depressing that I immediately felt terrible for wishing he would leave. However, underneath the many sad emotions that were orbiting around him, there was one that confused me. It was relief.

Why was Edward relieved?

Before I had time to ponder the question further, Edward snapped his eyelids open so that he was staring me in the face.

I stumbled back from the shock, far from Edward's arms.

"Sorry… I didn't mean to frighten you," He said, moving closer to me again. "Carlisle was talking to me through his mind. He says we've got to go…"

"Okay!" I said -a little too eagerly. Edward looked at me confused, but didn't press the issue.

"I'll call as soon as we land," he said kissing me again. "Don't worry, I'll be back before you've really even settled into the new place…" He said walking towards Carlisle's car. "I love you."

I couldn't do it. I couldn't say what he wanted to hear. How could I tell him that I loved him now, then in a week's time break his heart? It was cruel and unnecessary to give him false hope.

"Safe flight," I replied, blowing a kiss, and praying to god he wouldn't wonder why I hadn't returned his words.

I watched as the beautiful Mercedes slipped from the drive way like a shadow, and disappeared onto the road.

Like clock work, Jasper stepped down the stairs at that exact moment, smiling a huge warm smile that made my knees wobble. I took special care to notice that the first few buttons of his shirt had popped open, and I could see in plain view his perfect marble chest. He was wearing his sleeves rolled up, so I could see every little bite mark on his arms -They didn't detract from his beauty in the slightest. In fact if anything, they enhanced it. They made him look real and durable, not like a china doll that could break at any moment.

"Well… I have finally sorted through every tiny piece of junk I accumulated over the years. I'm all packed up!" He said, making the smile even larger.

"Really? I mean you're serious, we're free to go? ….Just you and me.. Together?"

"Well we could invite Emmett if you're that desperate," He laughed out.

"Oh shut up," I replied, punching him playfully on the arm. "Let me just grab my stuff."

"Oh no, no, no!" He said, chucking me over his shoulder and laughing, "We're leaving all that for the movers remember? It's just you, me and the big, open road.

As he moved us towards the living room, we came across Esme and Alice.

"Give each other a break, you'll wear him out soon Bella!" Alice said laughing.

Jasper immediately set me down on the ground softly. Although what we were doing could be considered sibling playfulness, it was better not to incense Alice's already pricked suspicion.

"So you two had better be off then, the movers will be here soon," Esme said, moving another handful of boxes to the corner of the room.

Jasper and I both nodded to her.

"We'll call when we arrive, to see where you're at." I said kissing her on the cheek.

"Jazzy?" Alice asked in a meek, soft voice. "Can I have a kiss goodbye?"

My heart sunk to the bottom of my chest as I continued talking to Esme, trying to distract myself.

It didn't work. I could hear Alice moan into his mouth. It was almost as if she were trying to hurt me, as if some part of her already knew about Jasper and I. I felt Jasper send me a wave of guilt, but I didn't blame him. Just one day ago the roles had been reversed, and it was Edward kissing me. I thought about taking a leaf from Jasper's book and breaking some furniture, but everything was already bubble wrapped.

Reluctantly Alice let go of Jasper as he pried himself from their embrace.

"Sorry Al, but we really should go… I can feel Bella's thirst waning." Jasper said, concocting a very valid lie.

Alice sighed loudly, "Okay then…. After all, we'll get to christen the new bedroom when we finally all get there." She said, giving him a wink.

Like hell you will! I wanted to shout. I needed to control my emotions, Jasper must have felt my strong jealousy and anger because he shot me an apologetic look.

"Alright let's go Bella," Jasper said, ushering me towards the garage. "We'll speak to you guys later. Bye Emmett and Rosalie, see you at the new house!" He shouted, although I was quite sure they would have heard it even if he had spoke it at a normal volume.

We walked hastily over to the Cullen's cars, but I stopped short when I noticed which car **we** would be driving.

"We're taking the Volvo? Edward's Volvo!?" I choked out.

"Yeah sorry.." Jasper replied, scratching his neck. "Since Edward's in Italy, there's no one to take his car…. So I volunteered us, on account of I only have my bike here."

I nodded, not really wanting to be difficult, as I sat in the passenger seat. Jasper closed my door for me, then in less than a second was sitting behind the wheel.

"You ready for this?" Jasper said raising his eyebrows.

I laughed at his expression.

"I've been waiting for this a long time.." I replied, raising my eyebrows too and building a strong barrier between Alice's vision and us.

He chuckled, then -without even looking ahead- managed to maneuver the car out of the garage and into the pouring rain outside. The rain seemed so fitting. It had poured for my arrival in Forks and now it was pouring for my departure. It was significant to me. As if the rain had marked my stay in Forks.

"You're happy." Jasper said, repeating the words from my first hunt, "Could I be so presumptuous to say it was your company that was having this affect on you?"

I laughed at him. "You **need** some new expressions!" He smiled at me.

"So…" I said, suddenly nervous as to what we would talk about. "We're going to be alone for a little while at the house.. What do you think we'll get up to?"

He turned to look at me and raised one eyebrow.

"Did you have something particular in mind?" He asked smiling, and sending me a wave of lust.

It had been a few minutes and already we had breeched this topic? Yes we were already out of Forks, but that was a given with the way Jasper, and vampires as a whole, liked to drive.

"Well I don't know… I was just thinking aloud," I said embarrassed and wishing I had never raised the topic. I started imagining what we could do, all the many wonderful things I had wanted to do for a while. I could touch him in ways I never had, better yet I could see his beautiful body again -and I wouldn't have to hide from embarrassment like last time.

Very soon the entire car was filled with a thick smog of lust and I found myself struggling to breath right. It was that damned circle of emotion between two empaths. Always being reflected and empowered of the other.

"How about some music?" I asked, trying to alleviate the crippling amount of lust.

I searched through Edward's mass of CD's, but finding nothing suitable I settled for the radio. As soon as I turned on the radio I wished I hadn't. Though I didn't know the name of the song, I had heard it before when I was human. Something about a man wanting to have sex with a lot of women. It was a crap song, but the lyrics were enough to push me over the edge. I slammed my hand against the radio, nearly breaking it, as I clenched my fists into the seat's fabric. Jasper pulled off the road into a small dirt track and suddenly turned off the car.

We sat in silence for a few moments, as the rain beat down relentlessly on the roof.

"Jasper… are you okay?" I asked tentatively.

He was hunched over the steering wheel and his breath was ragged and shallow. He turned to look at me, and I couldn't help it. I added another pound of lust to the already huge pile. I was abruptly pulled from my seat and straddled on Jasper's lap. He pushed his lips to mine as I gleefully returned the favor. I felt his tongue slide between my lips and I moaned at the sensation which only encouraged him more. His hands were everywhere, but it wasn't enough. I yanked my shirt over my head and his hands caressed the now available skin.

He pushed his body against mine and I could feel every inch of him -and I mean **every** inch of him. His lips slipped down my necks and over my chest causing me to buck against him, the feeling was unbelievable. He groaned into my skin and thrust his jean clad crutch against mine, causing me to hit the horn. Such an event may have been funny if we both weren't so driven by lust.

"Back…seat…now" Jasper struggled out.

I quickly complied and jumped off his lap and into the back seat. He followed soon after, removing his shirt and lying on top of me. I felt every stony muscle, now completely touchable. He slipped between my legs and I linked them together over his back. I couldn't believe how much I wanted him, I felt like I was literally going to explode.

"Bella, Bella, Bella," He said, repeating my name over and over against my skin. That was it, I couldn't stand any more waiting. I ripped open his jeans and moved my hands down to his pants.

"Wait, wait… Bella stop!" Jasper said, breathing erratically.

"What!? We're half naked, I have my hands down your pants and you want me to stop?!" I almost shouted at him.

"Well.. It's just… it may be stupid to you… but, I don't really want to make love to you for the first time in the back seat of your current husband's car…"

_He's got a point_, the lustful part of my brain spoke up.

_What!? You're meant to be all for this, you're suppose to support this!_ I mentally shouted at myself.

_But don't you want it to be special, this is **Edward's** car…_

Ugh! I wanted to scream, I needed my release now, I couldn't wait till we found a bed. But looking into Jasper's eyes I knew I would not complain. He was an old fashioned boy, and I don't think he'd like it very much if I practically raped him.

I sighed loudly, "Fine… We'll wait."

He smiled and gave me one more kiss.

"Just think," he said smiling. "The sooner we get home the sooner-"

"Yeah, yeah," I said rolling my eyes and only making him smile larger.

"Hit the gas."

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	13. Beneath the Stars

**Hello,**

**I'm sorry for leaving you all so unsatisfied yesterday lol! But you should be happier with this chapter, more JasperxBella goodness. There's also a hunt scene, it's not exactly 'graphic' but you don't have to read it…well you kind of do to make sense of the rest lol, so sorry if you find it gross.**

**Also, I don't actually know where about in Denali the Denali Clan live, so I just allocated them a town, sorry if it's wrong lol.**

**Well, that's about it. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, BUT I do own the new Cullen residence… unfortunately not literally.**

Chapter 13: Beneath the Stars

Our conversation settled into a comfortable pattern of answer and ask questions. One of us would ask a question from the other, then they would answer it themselves.

It was a quick way to learn more about each other, and it helped to keep our minds busy while we drove nearer to the house.

The questions began as easy going and innocent inquiries, but as time passed, they became more intimate and we found ourselves discussing things I hadn't even told Edward. I talked about Renee, and how I had always wished that she could have been more a mother than a friend. Jasper told me about his old lifestyle, even going as far as to tell me about his change -something he had left out when I was human. I nodded along silently as he recounted the three young woman he had encountered on the street. He spoke of the certain "love" he had held for Maria, though it was not that of a romanticist emotion, rather one that was forged because of their reliance on one another.

The rain poured down relentlessly on the Volvo's roof, as the car bounced and shuddered along the rough terrain we were forced to travel by. Concerned that we would come across a human scent, Jasper had insisted that we drive a little off-road for safety measures. We talked long into the afternoon until I noticed it was quite dark outside and Jasper had stopped the car. Curious as to why we had stopped I looked around outside the car and noticed that we were parked in the middle of forest.

"I thought it best we hunt now, we're very close to reaching the new house." Jasper said softly, as if afraid the very suggestion of a hunt would offend me.

The fire in my throat wasn't exactly scorching, but I didn't dare risk being hungry and coming across a human.

I nodded to Jasper and stepped from Volvo into the pouring rain. The forest was truly beautiful. Dripping in water, covered in wild flowers -it was a magnificent piece of nature.

"Where are we?" I asked in mesmerization.

"Kenai National wildlife refuge," he replied, taking my hand in his. "It's a few miles from the house in Seldovia. There's also a big Denali national park up north, but I didn't want to take you there in case…"

"We run into the Denali Clan?" I asked, finishing his sentence.

He nodded looking down. "They know we're coming of course, but I'd like to avoid a get together with them now if I could."

"Where in Denali do they live?" I asked, suddenly curious about this other 'vegetarian' family.

"A little way from Seldovia, they're a few miles north/west in a small village called Kantishna, they're house is in the mountains. Incredibly difficult for human's to find or stumble upon."

I was incredibly curious to meet them. After all, Edward had said that Tanya had shown an interest in him. Maybe when Jasper and I finally admitted to being together, he could return the interest. It was wishful thinking, but I needed something to lessen the blow.

"Are you ready to go?" Jasper asked me, noticing my deep thinking.

"Well that depends," I said smiling. "What kind of wild life does thins place offer?"

He laughed at me then replied in a very formal fashion, "Oh we offer a wide range of animals to suit every vegetarian vampire need. We've got a few different species of moose, Dall sheep, mountain goats, wolves, eagles, both brown and black bears and a small, but thriving, herd of caribous."

I kissed him on the cheek laughing.

"And how, may I ask, do you know every species in this animal refuge?" I asked still laughing.

He looked down at his feet and scuffed his shoes together. I was suddenly very concerned as to what the reason was.

"Uh, well…" He began timidly, "I hunted here a lot a couple of years back… you know, when we left Forks…"

I realized immediately why he had been so hesitant to tell me. The old Bella may have been on the ground by now, holding an old wound together with her arms around her chest. The new, more improved Bella was not.

"Jasper please," I said, stroking his arm. "It was a long time ago, I'm over it now. Besides, it wasn't like you forced Edward to walk out on me!"

"But if I hadn't attacked you, Edward never would have over reacted and you never would have had to deal with all that pain!" He said holding me in his arms, running his fingers up my back.

"Every saint has a past, every sinner has a future." I said quoting one of my favored writers.

He looked deeply into my eyes before whispering, "I love you," and kissing me with all the passion he could muster.

"Oh no, no, no!" I said, pushing him from me. "Until we get home, there will be minimal kissing. I don't want to be forced to take you in Edward's car," I said laughing and mussing his hair.

"Fair enough," he replied, before grabbing my hand once more and running with me into the forest. As we delved deeper into the trees, the scenery grew more and more exquisite. The heavy down pour of rain only made everything more beautiful, as it shone and reflected the moonlight off every surface.

"Your emotions are flying," Jasper stated, giving my hand a small squeeze.

"Its just… I mean I don't know if it's because I'm a vampire now, so I can appreciate more. Or maybe I never truly looked before, but everything is so beautiful." I turned to look at him. His hair was dripping down into his eyes, his shirt had completely soaked through and was sticking to every contour, every muscle. "**You're** so beautiful."

He lent in to kiss me, but abruptly stopped.

"Right, no kisses!" He said laughing.

I was immediately incredibly upset with my own stupid rule and huffed away further into the forest, receiving a gleeful laugh from Jasper. I picked up the scent of something unfamiliar. It wasn't human, I was quite sure, but it smelt rather divine.

"Caribou." Jasper stated, pointing my head in the direction to a small group drinking by a stream in a small meadow. If I hadn't had such a blood lust, I would have considered the sight quite picturesque. The full moon was mirrored in the reflection of the stream and the beautiful meadow had a wide array of wild flowers, framing each caribou's hoof.

"Go get 'em hunter." Jasper said, giving me a slap on the back.

_How romantic._ I thought sarcastically to myself, laughing.

I stepped forward carefully, feet as light as air on the soft, wet ground below. There were four caribous, each drinking from the stream, backs towards me. It was almost too easy. I crept forward slowly, cracking a twig beneath my toe. One caribou raised it's head slightly, but didn't search for the source of the sound. They were only small animals, I had no doubt that I would be able to drain them all easily.

The fire in the back of my throat scorched stronger as I grew closer to my prey. I was roughly three meters from them now and was quite sure I could make the jump. I leapt lithely into the air and landed on the back of one. Snap. Snap. Snap. Snap. I killed them all in seconds, moving my teeth to each neck and draining it quickly. The taste was unbelievable, so much stronger and more satisfying than grizzly bears. I moved onto the final animal and dug my teeth in sharply. I knew Jasper was standing close by, because I felt a strong wave of lust hit me. Even in my animal like state I almost laughed at him because of his odd fascination with the way I hunted.

Finished, I stood up staring down at my soaking clothes. They were not nearly as bloody as I had anticipated and I took comfort in that fact -I was getting better. Jasper was standing at the opposite end of the meadow, staring at me intently.

"I suppose you found that beautiful," I said laughing.

But he didn't answer.

"Jasper?" I asked, suddenly concerned.

"Is there a barrier between us and Alice?" He asked, breathing deeply.

He was scaring me, what was happening? "Yes," I replied, reinforcing it just to be sure.

In a split second Jasper had crossed the meadow and was kissing me deeply. Any concern I had flew out the window as I crushed my body to him and kissed him just as passionately. I didn't care that I was getting blood on him, or the fact that not ten meters away were several animal corpses, I wrapped my arms around his neck and jumped onto his hips, kissing him more deeply.

"This isn't Edward's car…" I said breathlessly and peeling his shirt off.

"No, no it isn't." He replied, pushing us down into the soft grass, amongst the several wild flowers.

Despite the animalistic manner we were behaving in, the whole thing was rather romantic. We were kissing amongst hundreds of flowers, in a beautiful meadow -bar the corpses- under a full moon. The silly, girlish side of me was having a field trip, the lustful, more adult side was too.

Jasper rolled over so that he had pinned me between his legs. There was not an inch of us that wasn't touching, but it still wasn't enough. Jasper's hands explored up my shirt as I traced every muscle on his beautiful body, praising the universe for making such a wonderful creature. His right hand traveled to the small of my back and held me up to him, crushing my pelvis to his. The friction was unbelievable and I had to bury my head in Jasper's shoulder to stop from screaming.

"I love you so much Bella. I need you to know that," he said, kissing a trail of light kisses down my neck.

"I know, of course I know." I replied panting, "I love you too, more than anything in the entire world… I want this."

And that was the truth -I did want it. I had wanted it for a while now. Of course I'd only done it once, with Edward. So I wasn't exactly a virgin, but the entire experience was still sort of new to me. Especially since I was no longer a human. Edward had been so careful that it felt more like well executed plan than an act of love, not that I blamed him, I **was** incredibly fragile then.

I was slammed back to reality, with the sensation of Jasper's hands at the front of my jeans. After fumbling with the button he seemed to give up, so he just ripped it open.

"Excited are we?" I said smiling.

He silenced me with his lips as I felt his tongue trace the curve of mine.

"Would you rather I stop?" He said teasing me and pushing his crutch against mine for added emphasis.

"No... never stop…" I said, lost in the power he held over me.

He managed to pull my jeans off in one fluid motion, without ripping or tearing them. I had more maneuverability in my legs now, so I looped them together behind his back, securing him to me. I didn't want a repeat of the stunt he pulled in Edward's car.

"Bella, Bella, Bella." He whispered, unhitching my legs from his back and kissing soft lines over my thighs and stomach. It left trails of fire where ever his lips met my skin.

"Please Jasper… Please…" I was begging, I realized. But I couldn't stand it any longer, I loved him so much, I needed to show him. Show him that I would always be his.

He had been so dainty with the removal of my clothes, I however did not have such grace. I ripped his jeans from his body, throwing the tattered pieces into the bush. Jasper began to laugh so I pushed my hips against his groin firmly, which quickly shut him up.

We were now both in only our underwear. Jasper leaned up and looked down at my body, I was suddenly incredibly self conscience.

"Please don't feel like that," he said, raking my body with his eyes. "You are the most stunning creature I have ever seen. You are kind, caring, beautiful and wonderfully humorous… and I don't deserve you."

"I feel the same way about you…" I said, kissing him softly.

"And you're sure about this?" He asked gesturing to the compromising position we were in.

"More than I've ever been sure about anything in my life." I said earnestly.

He kissed me softly and tenderly, there was no longer such an urgent edge to the kiss. It was sweet and loving, I felt every fiber of my being come alive as his lips traveled down my neck, then back to my lips.

"I love you." He stated simply, removing the rest of our clothing.

I kissed him deeply, "I love you more."

He nudged my legs open with his, and he stared into my eyes as he finally pushed through and we became one. It was a moment of pure bliss, no more tension, or stress. I felt so complete, I wanted to cry. I had never felt joy like this. Jasper continued to kiss me as he whispered sweet nothings in my ear. We moved in synchronized movements. The flowers around us moved lithely in the breeze covering our bodies in a mass of petals.

"I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you" Jasper repeated the words in my ear, whispering his love for me over and over. I felt something inside me build strongly, it grew with each movement and finally spilled over as I dug my finger nails into his back, curling my toes. Not a second later I felt his release as his forced his mouth on mine, stifling my moan.

He moved off me and held me close to body. I wrapped my arms around his torso and kissed his chest in circles.

"I love you more than you will ever know," he said kissing my hair.

Even though the rain beat down relentlessly around us, even though I was sticky with blood and venom, for the first time -the very first time in my life- I felt I was truly where I belonged. In the arms of the man I loved, I was content and happy.

I was home.

**Fin.**

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	14. Home

**Hello again,**

**I'm glad you all liked the pervious chapter so much lol, I thought some of you may freak over the whole 'sex after hunt' but it was actually quite well received.**

**That's about it,**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

Chapter 14: Home

We lay on the wet ground holding each other for what felt like hours. Every few minutes I would feel Jaspers breath on my face as he uttered "I love you," then he would continue running his hands over my body, as if he thought I may disappear at any moment. I was kissing butterfly kisses over his stomach and chest then making my way to his mouth for a deep kiss. The circuit continued and I was loving every minute.

"Bella, my sweet, perfect goddess…"

His voice was so soothing and yet at the same time; triggered every fiber of my being to stand on end, like electricity.

"I don't ever want to leave this position.." He continued, running a hand through my no doubt messy hair.

I put my chin on his chest so that I was looking him in the eyes.

"Neither do I… But as I've come to expect over the years, you don't always get what you want."

"Really?" He said pouting, moving his hands down my shoulders and across my back.

I wanted to give in to his pleading expression; tell him that we could stay here, screw the consequences. But it was getting late, the rest of the family would be arriving at dawn and neither of us had enough clothing to arrive after them.

"We should get going…" I said reluctantly. "The rest of the family will be arriving in the morning and I've ripped your jeans to shreds."

He chuckled a low, throaty laugh.

"I've still got my underwear," He replied, pulling a coy smile and holding a tattered, lace pair in his hands.

"Those are mine!" I said, laughing at the state he'd managed to get them in.

Jasper laughed and pulled me up so that I was leaning against his chest, brushing his fingers in the ends of my hair.

"What we just did… well I don't want to sound corny, but… It meant more to me than any thing I have ever experienced in my unlife."

I lifted my head and put my cheek against his.

"**You** have meant more to me than anything I have ever know in both my life and unlife," I whispered into his ear, kissing his cheek at the end.

We stared into each others eyes and it was only us. No more marriage, or secrets. No more lying and hiding, there were only the two of us in the world, nothing else mattered.

Jasper leant in and kissed my more lovingly than I had ever felt before. Our lips moved together in perfect unison, but it ended too quickly, as Jasper pulled back and sighed loudly.

"Let's go, before I'm forced to make love to you again right here."

I laughed at him, kissing him softly once more one the lips.

"Now it's just a case of finding our clothes," I said smiling, and slipping on the tattered underwear Jasper had held up a minute ago.

"Hey!" Jasper cried out, feigning seriousness. "I wanted to keep those!"

He kept the same facial expression for about three seconds, before erupting into laughter and chasing me around the dark meadow. Eventually he gave up though, and set off in search of his own underwear and the beautiful jeans that I had ripped into four pieces.

After finding my torn jeans, a ripped shirt and a broken bra I moved back to our 'flower-bed' and waited anxiously to see what Jasper had managed to scrape together. He came out from behind a tree with no shirt and a shammy looking pair of pants held together by a vine.

"You look like Tarzan!" I said laughing, and taking in his god like form.

"Well, well then…" He said cracking a smile, "If I'm as you say Tarzan, then you **must** be my Jane." And with that he chucked me over his shoulder banging his chest with his hands and took of into the forest, towards the Volvo.

Swinging open the passenger door and dumping me very unceremoniously in the seat, Jasper managed to jump over me and into the driver's seat, turning to face me and giving me a very sexy growl. I laughed at him, taking his head in between my hands and kissing him slowly.

"Shall we get going?" I said, releasing him from my lips and winking.

"You are a very dangerous creature, my Bella." He replied, shaking his head and clicking his tongue.

As we pulled out of the muddy terrain and onto the rough, gravel road, I realized that we were going to have to thoroughly clean Edward's car. Sure, a hunt was a valid reason for getting it slightly muddy, but I didn't want another reason to upset Edward when he returned.

Seven more days. I suddenly felt like it wasn't enough. Would I be ready to tell them when the time came?

"Your emotions are very conflicted." Jasper stated very matter of factly.

I sighed deeply.

"Will we be able to do it?" I asked, fiddling with my fingers.

"Do what?" He asked, stopping my fidgeting with his hand.

"Break their hearts,"

Jasper was suddenly silent and he removed his hand from mine. When I looked up at him, he was staring intently out the windscreen, as if struggling to see through the storm.

"… I don't think we really have a choice." He murmured. "I can't **not** tell them, its driving me insane already. Every time I think about him, touching you, kissing you. It drives me mad with jealousy, I can't just forget everything that happened between us."

I slipped my hand back into his, kissing his finger tips.

"That's not what I mean, not at all. I can't not tell them either, but its so hard. I don't want to go back to the way things were, too much has changed. I've changed. But… how will we tell them? What can we possibly say to make it seem alright?"

"There isn't anything." He said looking at me, not a care for the road. "Some one will always get hurt in situations like this. All we can hope is that they see how happy we are together and don't try to interfere."

_Interfere? _I hadn't even thought of that. What if they tried to keep us apart?

"We'll leave." I said seriously, "If they can't handle it, we'll leave. Go somewhere they can't stop us being together. But lets be serious, do you actually think they'll try and force us away from each other?"

"I'm not sure… People do crazy things when they're in love. Always remember that. Alice and Edward still love us deeply, it will take time to heal the wounds."

Jasper was right. People **did** do crazy things when they were in love. I knew that better than most people. Edward and Jacob were always pulling crazy stunts to try and win my affections.

"What will be will be." I said, repeating Jaspers words to me.

He smiled at me and blew me a kiss.

"Welcome home."

I looked at him confused for a moment as he gestured to a sign we were passing.

_Welcome to Seldovia, Population 286_

I laughed to myself. What a small town.

Jasper took a sharp turn to the right, driving through an old path that I was quite sure wasn't really a road.

"Sorry," He said giving me an apologetic smile. "Though the town is small, I don't want you to catch a human scent."

I smiled at him appreciatively and mouthed thank you.

We must have traveled for at least another ten minutes until we reached a large canopy of trees which seemed to frame a long drive way.

"Home?" I asked, incredibly curious to glimpse the place I would call home for the next ten years.

Jasper turned to nod at me and smiled.

I already was in love with it. The land was situated on the water and it seemed to stretch out for miles. Every star in the sky was reflected in the black of the water, it was as if someone had pulled a large shimmering black sheet over the ocean, it was truly beautiful.

"What body of water is that?" I asked.

Jasper laughed and kissed my earlobe before whispering,

"Oh my dear Bella, **that **is the Pacific Ocean."

It was mesmerizing.

As the car wound down the long drive way, the trees seemed to grow thicker, creating a large, dense canopy, shutting out the sky.

"Why…?"

I suddenly completely stopped asking the question I was about to ask. A large, tall building came into view. It was absolutely magnificent. It must have been four of five levels high -it was like a castle! It was made of old stone and looked like a Victorian style house built hundreds of years ago. Hundreds of vines spiraled up the walls, interconnecting every small balcony, every window.

"Is that my house? I mean is that where we're going to live?!" I asked flabbergasted.

"I'm glad your pleased, Esme was stressing out over weather you'd like it.." Jasper whispered in my ear, pushing open my door and gesturing for me to get out.

I stepped out slowly onto the ground below. The ground moved at my feet. I looked down and noticed that the drive way was a collection of beautiful, white pebbles; each gleaming in the night.

"Oh my god…" I said, lost for words.

The steps leading up to the house were a beautiful, rich sandstone. To both sides of the steps were a wonderful assortment of flowers; rose bushes, babies breath and tulips -They smelt divine. I walked up the stairs cautiously, as if my mere foot print may bring about the ruin of this beautiful building.

Jasper picked me up bridal style in his arms and moved towards the front door. And for the second time that night whispered,

"Welcome home."

**This chapter is shorter than usual, I know.**

**Don't hurt me lol!**

**Review**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	15. Interrupted

**You are all very lucky, I was almost not going to write this chapter till tomorrow. I'm very tired and sore and I really want to go to bed lol!**

**Thanks to all my wonderful reviewers I feel like I have to write the chapter. I'm also afraid if I don't some of you may hurt me haha!**

**So please enjoy this very likely to be crappy chapter,**

**Read on!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 15: Interrupted

"Close your eyes," Jasper whispered into my ears as he nudged the double front doors open with his toe.

I didn't really want to, but I complied. Jasper's gaze held a certain control over me, and I constantly found myself giving into his requests much too easily.

Even without my sight, my vampiric hearing allowed me to gain an idea of exactly what we were doing, and how far into the house we had stepped. Each step echoed lightly in the room we had stepped into; so I presumed it was a wide, entrance hall -possibly marble, or some sort of mineral stone. Jasper swung me softly from his arms and onto the floor. It was cool and hard.

Tiles? Or perhaps granite? I thought to myself, trying to discern exactly what sort of room I was in.

"Can I open my eyes now?" I asked enthusiastically.

I felt Jasper's hand slide into mine and entwine his fingers with mine.

"Just come a little closer," he breathed onto my face, making me shiver in delight.

I slowly made a few more steps forward, reaching my other hand out to prevent myself walking into a wall.

Jasper slipped his hand from mine and ran his fingers down the sides of my body.

"Now." He said, kissing me softly.

I opened my eyes slowly, as if the first sight of this beautiful house may blind me… It almost did. It was most certainly an entrance hall I was standing in, but it was unlike any room I had ever seen before. The walls were made of gleaming, white alabaster stone -a serious contrast to the soft, sand colored stone outside. There were several marble, roman style columns supporting the many levels above this, that were etched with deep carvings of vines, to create the illusion of nature. Directly in front of me was the most magnificent stairwell I had ever seen. Also made of alabaster, the stairs stretched forward widely, then split into a fork, Two sides bending in opposite directions around the second level, while the third stretched upwards in the same wide manner to the third and fourth. On closer inspection, I noticed that the same fork pattern continued for each level of the house.

"I take it by your awe struck expression and emotions that you like the house so far?" Jasper said coyly, knowing very well how I felt about it.

"Like it…" I said breathlessly, "I **love** it! This makes the house in Forks look like dirt!"

He laughed loudly, grabbing my hand and dragging me forward. "It is a little extravagant…"

"Oh… but… so pretty…" I said, still stunned by the beauty of the first room.

He laughed again, squeezing my hands.

"Oh Bella, You have such a way with words."

The entrance hall had two wide archways, left and right to the stair case. I assumed they would both meet up eventually, so I let Jasper drag me left first -knowing very well we would make it full circle around the first level.

The first archway lead us to a wide cupboard door. Upon opening it I discovered it was a large coat room, equipped with electricity so that the coat rack moved with just the flick of a switch. The entire back wall of the closet was riddled with small box holes, equipped for holding at least forty different pairs of shoes. I decided that this particular room would hardly be used at all, as I was quite sure every room in this beautiful house, would be well equipped with a large walk in robe.

Moving on, I soon discovered a magnificent kitchen that most upset me. Not because of my memories of food and preparation, but rather the fact that no one would ever experience the joy of cooking in a kitchen this well equipped. It had blue granite tops, a large breakfast bar, and a wide array of cooking stoves, ovens, gas tops and hundreds of cabinets with more room for space than my old room had offered.

"You're upset?" Jasper asked, clearly confused by my sudden change on mood.

"It's just such a waste," I replied, moving on to the other rooms of the house.

Jasper swung his arm over my shoulder, leading me away from the direction I was headed in and moving me towards the double open doors towards the back of the kitchen.

"This is something that made me fall in love with the house… I thought you'd enjoy it too."

He pulled the doors open roughly, then held his hand out to me, gesturing to me with his head. I stepped forward slowly, curious as to what could make Jasper fall in love with a house.

As I stepped past Jasper, sliding through the small opening of the doors, I discovered exactly why Jasper had chosen to show me this before the rest of the house. It was absolutely stunning. It was a large patio with a glass ceiling allowing streams of moonlight to poke through the trees above and flood into the open space.

"Oh my god!" I said stunned.

There was a large fountain in the centre of the patio, and it was chilling how much it reminded me of the fountain in Italy. There was a large spout at the middle of the fountain and then three smaller, surrounding spouts, branching of from the largest one.

"I never want to leave this place…" I said softly, running my hand through the cool water, and picking up a pond lily. I could see my reflection in the rippling water and my face looked so content. I was so enthralled by my current surroundings that I wanted to dive into the shallow pool of water and just float over the surface.

"You like it then…?" He asked timidly, sitting down next to me at the edge of the fountain.

"It's beautiful…" I replied, staring at our reflection together in the water.

"Do you want to see the rest of the house now?" He asked, moving his hand onto mine.

I nodded softly, not really wanting to leave my perfect place.

He helped me stand up and then steered me back towards the sliding doors, stepping softly onto the hard, smooth tiles.

As we moved back through the kitchen we came across a large dining room with a high ceiling. There was a large, sparkling chandelier hanging from the centre of the roof, with hundreds of sparkling crystals, reflecting the light in thousands of rainbows across the room. There was a large stone tablet table in the middle of the room, with twelve adjoining chairs pushed underneath. The walls were a rich mahogany color which made the room appear royal and grand.

"Is there anything about this house that sucks?" I asked laughing and marveling in the wonder of my magnificent home.

"Not much," he replied, pulling me back into the entrance hall.

We just stood together in the entrance, too impressed to speak. Jasper's emotions started to change drastically, as he squeezed my hand looking up.

"Would you like to see the bedrooms now?" He said, winking at me and then looking down shuffling his feet together nervously.

"You mean a bed? Well that would be a novel experience!" I said laughing at his sweet shyness.

He held his hand out towards me and looked up at the large stairwell.

I went to move net to him but there was suddenly a high-pitched ring, that repeated over and over, interrupting our moment of bliss.

"Phone," Jasper said, answering my unasked question.

Then he was gone.

"Jasper?" I asked confused about where he'd suddenly disappeared to.

There was a long silence as the incessant ringing of the phone stopped abruptly.

_"Calm down Alice… No don't worry… we're fine… I'm sorry we were hunting I must have lost my phone!"_

Alice? Of course -Alice!! We'd promised that we would call when we had arrived, and due to our little… Uh… 'detour' we were running a little behind schedule.

_"Wolves? Please Alice you know that Bella is self conscience about her hunting skills…. She didn't want you peeping in… well its embarrassing for her!"_

Crap. Alice's vision. She would have been worrying that something had happened when she couldn't see our future.

_"…No …I'm sorry too… we should have called… yes…"_

Jasper lowered his voice considerably so that I had to move closer to hear the end of the sentence.

_"I love you too…"_

Even though I knew he had to say it, it still hurt significantly. When Edward had said it to me, I hadn't replied. I didn't want to give him false hope, and I didn't want to hurt Jasper. But Jasper had said it to Alice… was there still a part of him that loved his wife? It wasn't unreasonable to say that it was true. They had been together for decades, it was foolish to think that I could have severed that love so easily.

Jasper came back in looking upset.

"That was Alice…"

"So I heard," I said -a little shaken by my previous thoughts.

"What's wrong?" He asked suddenly concerned, rushing over by my side.

I sighed quietly, but Jasper's ears picked it up easily.

"Do you still love Alice?" I asked, suddenly afraid of the answer.

Jasper was quiet for at least a minute. I was afraid to look up at his eyes and glimpse that apologetic glance I'd seen so many times before, but his emotions were not sad, or remorseful, but rather angry.

"How can you ask me that!?" He asked, emotions bouncing off the wall.

"I don't know…" I said, trying in vain to take back my words. "It's just I heard you on the phone… and I mean, you guys were in love for decades I didn't expect it just to change-"

I was cut off by Jasper's lips on mine. He pushed me up firmly against a marble column, trapping me between his body and the stone.

"Don't you dare think that again!" He spat out angrily, kissing me hungrily on the lips once more, devouring my lips with his, tasting my mouth on his.

I didn't care that he was angry anymore, or the fact that I hadn't quite seen the rest of my new house, the reality was we didn't have a lot of time left until the others arrived, and I wanted to feel Jasper again, feel us move as one.

I jumped up against him, wrapping my legs around his hips so that he had to hold me against the marble and push his crutch against mine. He moaned against my mouth and I took this opportunity to kiss him properly, moving my tongue softly against his and securing my arms around his neck, holding him to me.

"Bed this time?" Jasper asked breathlessly.

"Well unless you prefer the feeling of stone?" I said smiling against his lips.

As he moved us away from the marble column and towards the alabaster stairs, we heard the familiar sound of wheels running over pebbles. When the wheels stopped turning, the sound of several car doors being opened was heard, followed by a shrill, pixie like squeal of joy from outside.

"Honey, I'm home!"

**I'm tired,**

**God this chapter was crap…**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	16. Caught?

**Hello again,**

**I have the flu today which is bad news for me, but good news for you! As I'll be inside all day, and am therefore forced to write an longer chapter lol! **

**So onto the story, will they get caught? Who knows! Haha, this chapter may not go quite how you expect lol, just keep reading till the final word…**

**Enjoy!**

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight and thus anything associated.

Chapter 16: Caught?

"_Honey, I'm home!"_

They were home! The entire family had arrived, and I was scantily clad in the arms of another man. Why had they arrived so early? I didn't expect them till dawn…

However, I didn't have time to ponder such thoughts. In a moment of sheer panic, I threw Jasper from my embrace half way across the room, so that he skidded along the smooth tile and smashed right through the large cloak room door.

Jasper's voice sounded out from the dark hole in the cupboard.

"Bella!? I understand you trying to alleviate the situation, but this has just made things worse!"

My breathing became erratic and shallow, as I felt the all too familiar feeling of a panic attack consume my body. They were regular occurrences when I was human, but fortunately as I was now vampire, I didn't experience the full brunt of it's force.

Feeling the stress and instability of my emotions, Jasper rushed from his small squat in the cupboard door to my side.

"Bella, calm down." He said, shaking my shoulders and forcing me to look him in the eye. "You've got to keep your head, I won't be able to deal if your mind collapses onto itself again."

He was deeply concerned and his sentiment touched me, but we were still dressed in our tattered clothing and I was sure our scent was all over each other. We couldn't explain this, we had to find some clothing. But it was too late…

The front doors swung open roughly, as Emmett's mammoth form entered, silhouetted by the moonlight.

"Sick! Check out our new pad Rose!"

Emmett's eyes re-adjusted to the dark room, as his eyes scanned the large entrance hall and finally fell upon us.

"What the hell?!" He asked, booming laughter echoing through the empty house. "Did Bella go all jungle woman on you guys… I mean Jasper… man, you look like Tarzan!"

Despite the seriousness of the situation, I laughed, for which I received a shameful glare from Jasper.

"Oh.. Well, you see… funny story…" I said, desperately searching my mind for the creative vein I knew was there somewhere.

"Jazzy!" Alice squealed as she jumped into his arms, neglecting to see what he was wearing, or more importantly -what he wasn't.

She wrapped her legs around his waist and kissed him passionately. It was eerie how similar the position Jasper and I had just been in was to this.

Alice pulled her face back from his lips and scrunched her nose.

"You reek of Bella!" She said, hopping of his hips. Her eyes scanned down his body as she finally realized how oddly Jasper was clothed. Suspicion flooded her emotions.

"Why are you wearing a vine like a belt?" She asked Jasper, then redirecting her attention to me.

"And why are you dressed like Anna Nicole Smith?" She spat at me, sniffing the air around me, for what I was sure smelt just as strongly of Jasper.

This was it. Think quickly now, or tell the entire family. It wasn't enough time, I couldn't come out yet.. It was just too soon. So I did what any girl in the same situation would do -I cried.

My body shook violently with tears that would never come, as I collapsed on the smooth tiles in a heap. At first the family was still, shocked by the turn of events. Jasper moved to comfort me, but Rosalie beat him. She picked me up in her arms and cradled me against her chest, which only made me cry harder. Rosalie was finally being the friend to me that I had always dreamed she would, but it wouldn't last. Not once I told her I had been sleeping with her sister's husband.

"Sssshhhhh…." She whispered soothingly into my ear, stroking her fingers through my knotty locks. She rocked me back and forth against her, humming an unfamiliar tune.

"It's okay, you can tell us what happened… Did something happen while you were hunting?" She asked softly, continuing to hum her small tune.

Something **did** happen while we were hunting. Something wonderful and beautiful, but not what any of them had expected. But Rosalie's words had given me an idea. I felt terrible for using her kind, loving words as a means of escape. But the only other choice was one I wasn't prepared to do.

"Yes…" I choked out through me sobs, "Something happened…"

The family gasped, as Esme and Emmett both ran to my side.

"Oh sis!" Emmett cried out, taking both Rose and I in a bone crushing hug. I cried hard into his shoulder. I would lose them all. Their trust, their love and forgiveness, it would all disappear when Jasper and I came out.

Esme looked like she would cry as she kissed me on both my cheeks, muttering kind words into my ear repeatedly. I looked up to find Jasper had joined in the family hug and when I met his eyes, he sent me a wave of love and squeezed both my hands. Not surprisingly, Alice stayed out of the group cry. She needed an explanation.

My family slowly released me from their embrace, but stayed sitting close to me; like a bunch of children, eager to hear the tale of woe. I cleared my throat loudly, glancing swiftly at Jasper, to find his eye brows pulled together in a state of confusion. Of course he was confused, he had no idea what I was about to reveal.

"We decided to hunt…" I started, sniffing my nose loudly. "Jasper had thought it best to be on a full stomach in case we had to pass through the town."

No one dared to speak, they just stared -mouths agape and listening intently.

"We hunted in one of those animal refuges, so there was a lot of variety but… There was something besides animals there. One of the care takers, or possibly a tourist, they were still there to feed the animals or something… I smelt them and I took off…"

I realized this story was vaguely similar to my last excuse, but I needed something credible to explain why we were dressed like this.

"Jasper was prepared this time though, he managed to hold me back, but the animalistic part of me took it as a challenge and I fought back…"

Esme was shaking his head softly, engrossed in my tale of lies.

"I almost killed him!" I cried out, "I'm so sorry Alice… I wasn't me,"

Alice moved swiftly by my side and took my head against her chest.

"No I'm sorry… I should have been there for you, not stood out like an angry, jealous wife! It's just you two were all over each other.. And I just assumed the worst.

I nodded at her softly, wrapping my arms around her.

After a minute or two she pulled back from our embrace and brushed the hair from my eyes.

"So what happened?" She asked, breathing her cool breath over my face.

I turned to look at Jasper before I continued. He was staring at me intently, like another listener, anxious to hear the ending.

"Well we fought… I scratched at him and tried to rip at his skin, hence the current clothing…"

"But how did you stop?" Emmett asked concerned, a mask of seriousness having replaced his usual happy demeanor.

I licked my lips in preparation. Was I seriously about to tell them this? I wanted to say some thing which remotely resembled truth.. And this may help to prepare them for what would inevitably come. But would Jasper be okay with how I framed him?

I sighed loudly… "Jasper um.. He kissed me…"

"What?!" Alice was first.

Followed by Rose and Emmett, "What?!"

"What?!" Then Esme.

And finally Jasper, "WHAT!?"

"It wasn't an act of romance or anything sexual guys!" I explained quickly, silencing all their questions. "It was love… AS IN FAMILY LOVE!" I backtracked swiftly. "Jasper knew that I cared about my family, he knew it would bring me back and it did!"

Alice turned to look at Jasper, her emotions were unreadable.

"Ordinarily I would slap you for kissing another woman but… I think it was the sweetest thing you could have ever done for our family, so thank you!" She said, kissing him on the cheeks.

She swung herself into his arms, and over the top of the Alice's shoulder, Jasper turned to look at me smiling.

"Really it was nothing," He said still smiling. "I knew it would bring Bella back, I just hoped she wouldn't mind someone like me kissing her…" He finished up by blowing me a wave of lust.

Esme picked me up of the ground and swung me into her arms.

"My poor child, you've had to suffer through so much already…"

I wasn't poor or a victim of any kind, I was a horrible liar. I had played all of my families emotions to gain an advantage. I buried my face into Esme's shoulder and cried again. I cried for Alice and Edward, I cried for Jasper and I cried for all the terrible things I had already done.

The rest of the family, taking my sadness as a sign of my recent regret, huddled close to me as we stood together in our empty new home.

I had no right to call this place home. Home was a place where a family was one, but I was going to rip my family apart, ruining this happy home.

As time passed, my loud sobs softened to a quiet murmur, and my body's shaking lessened to a small rock. My family slowly left my circle of upset, some wandering off to unpack certain belongings, while others retreated to hunts. After about an hour it was just Jasper and I.

We couldn't talk to each other. Not here, at least not what we wanted to say. I had no idea what Jasper thought of me telling the others that he kissed me. There was no anger in his emotions, which I took as a good sign, but there was disappointment; which in many ways was worse than anger. But a part of me suspected he may have been disappointed that we didn't just do it, we didn't get it over and done with and tell them.

We sat Indian style on the floor just looking at each other. There were no more words, my unshed tears had said all that I could say for how felt. I scooted closer to Jasper and crawled into his lap, resting my head against his shoulder. I didn't care if any of the family saw this. It could be construed as family comforting one another, even though to me it meant so much more.

"I have to hunt…" Jasper whispered regretfully in my ear. "I don't want to… but I didn't get a chance to last time, and my control is waning…"

"Go… I'll be fine here, I mean hey, I still haven't seen the rest of this magnificent castle."

I didn't want him to leave, but it was necessary -he needed to hunt. The bruise like shadows under his eyes seemed permanently etched into his skin. It was the same equivalent to if a human hadn't slept for a month. The beautiful, mesmerizing gold of his eyes had all but disappeared, and I found it surprising that I hadn't noticed earlier.

He held me close to my body, hugging me.

"Bella?" Rosalie's sweet voice echoed from the left archway of the entrance hall.

Jasper didn't relinquish his hold on me like I expected. Instead he squeezed me tighter, then kissed the top of my head and ran out the front door.

"I hope I didn't scare him off?" Rose asked, moving closer to Jasper's now vacant spot on the floor.

"He needed to hunt anyway," I said hoarsely, My voice having not quite recovered from my sobs.

Rosalie sat down next to me on the tile and put her arms around my shoulders.

"It's been a long day, the family isn't quite up to unpacking yet… do you want me to draw you a bath?"

I didn't want to cry again, but Rosalie's sentiment as both a sister and a friend was having it's toll on my emotions.

I turned to look at her, taking her hand in mine.

"Thank you Rose, You've truly been a good sister to me through all of this," I said, bringing her in for a small hug.

She wrapped her arms around my neck, and spoke softly into my ear.

"I know I wasn't really a front runner for the idea of you joining our family…"

She was right. She had been firmly against it, but the Rose then was like a completely different person to the current one trying to comfort me.

"But…" She said continuing, "You've fitted into the family like the missing puzzle piece we've been searching for… and I don't just mean in regards to Edward." She moved back when she said this, looking me in the eye. There was something about the way her eye sparkled when she said this. Did she know about Jasper already? Did she understand how well we'd fit into each other's lives? It was possible. Edward had always said Rose was more involved with herself than anyone else in the family. But I was beginning to think that it was all hearsay. Perhaps no one in the family -bar Emmett- ever really paid much attention to her because they thought that she gave them no thought. But she obviously did. She cared about her family a lot and she saw things that the others did not.

She helped me stand up right, then took my hand in her's.

"Come on, we'll get you nice and clean in a warm bath then we'll show you around the rest of the house. You've only seen this level, correct?"

I nodded slowly, still stifled by her heart warming kindness.

We ascended the stairs three at a time, as I took in the wonder that was the second floor. The walls were a deep, ocean blue and were embellished with intricate swirl patterns, painted very thinly in a gold color. The first hallway we turned down was covered in paintings with large golden frames which matched the color of the gold on the walls. Each painting held a beautiful picture of certain members of the Cullen family. The first was a picture of Carlisle, Esme and Edward. It must have been at least a hundred years old, but the picture was in perfect condition.

"Esme likes to add her personal touch where she can," Rosalie told me, gesturing to the ten more portraits that lined the adjacent hallway.

"This one's you…" I said, pointing at a beautiful painting of blonde girl sitting on plush, red chair, staring out a wide, glass window.

"Yes…" She sighed out. "It was about a year into my change, Carlisle had a friend who shared our way of living. He was a painter, in fact most of the portraits here are works of his."

"They're beautiful…" I said, tracing my finger through the etching on the frames.

"We'll have to get a new one painted, now that you're apart of the family." She said smiling and pulling me down the next hallway. We were passing many doors, but I didn't ask what was in them, I was too enthralled by the paintings from the past.

We walked past a rather large portrait of a beautiful woman with long black hair, and a handsome man with shimmering blond hair. It was Alice an Jasper. Jasper looked so happy, I'd never actually seen him smile like he was in the portrait… how happy he had been…

"Does it hurt?" Rosalie asked tentatively, breaking my thoughts.

"What?" I asked, suddenly defensive.

She sighed softly looking down, "never mind… This portrait was painted when they first moved in with us. Alice's hair of course isn't that long.. She was wearing a wig,"

Rosalie laughed at some distant memory.

"…She had said she wanted to be painted like a princess, she couldn't remember her past life, but she desperately wanted long hair. Esme and I went to every wig shop in town, Alice had so much fun."

"Jasper looks happy too," I said, curious to the cause.

"Well Jasper had never know a life without death and hate," she explained. "Before us, he didn't know that vampires could co-exist without ripping each other to shreds, we showed him a new way to live. With a mother, father and siblings… if I recall correctly, this was the day he played his first ever game with another vampire. We played football…"

She laughed again at the memory,

"It was the 1950's… we didn't have a wide variety of sport like today… But Jasper had so much fun that day, then we had the portraits done and he couldn't stop smiling."

I smiled too, even a painted Jasper's happiness was contagious.

"Ah, here we are…" Rose said, opening up a large double door room in the middle of the hallway.

We stepped in, and once more I was blown away by the marvel of this house. It was a large bathroom, with an enormous bath at the back of the room, it looked more like a small pool. Next to the bath was a large, wooden-like stall. As I moved closer I realized it was a sauna.

"Whose bathroom is this?" I asked, thoroughly impressed.

"Oh, it's just a spare…" Rosalie answered dismissively, waving her hand.

"A spare?! But its so beautiful!" I said stunned.

Rosalie laughed her melodic laugh and gestured to the large tub.

I moved to the back of the room and inspected three large taps.

"Why three?" I asked curiously.

"Do you know how long it would take to fill a tub this large with just one?" She said laughing and turning all three on. "Now, bubbles or no bubbles?"

Now it was my turn to laugh. Rosalie was acting very motherly and I thought it incredibly sweet of her to care so much about my comfort.

"Bubbles please," I replied, squeezing almost an entire bottle under the running stream.

In no time at all, the bath was filled with hundreds of bubbles and Rose turned the hot water off.

"There we are!" She said proudly, "A bath fit for royalty! I'll turn around while you hop in…"

I didn't particularly mind, the family had seen me close to naked before, besides we were girls. But I peeled off my bloody clothing and dumped them to the side, grateful for Rose's new found respect for me.

I stepped in to the warm suds carefully and slipped down beneath the bubbles so that I wet my hair. Rosalie joined after, and I showed her the same respect by turning the other way. The bath was so large, we could sit at opposite ends and struggle to have a dignified conversation, so I moved slightly closer -still keeping at a respectable distance.

Rosalie suddenly burst out laughing.

"What?!" I asked, suddenly self conscience that I'd done something.

"I'm just imagining if Emmett walked in now… he'd have a field trip and I'd never hear the end of it.."

I joined in with her laughing, she was right! Emmett would turn this kind, friendly thing Rose was doing for me, into a dirty sexual thing about girls in a bath. I was immediately very upset. A part of me didn't want to tell the others about Jasper and I anymore. If I would lose all this sisterly, brotherly and motherly love, was it worth it? Of course it was… in knew that, but it was hard to let go…

"What's wrong?" Rose asked, sensing my change in mood. It wasn't empath, Rose was a woman. And women could always tell.

I wanted to tell her. Ask her for help on what to do, I couldn't not do it! I just needed someone to tell me what I was feeling wasn't wrong. That the love Jasper and I shared wasn't wrong and disgusting, like I was expecting Edward or Alice to.

"I've done something wrong Rose… So wrong that it will tear apart the people I love…"

She looked at me softly, willing me to continue.

"I've fallen in love with Jasper…"

**Mwahaha! **

**Don't hurt me lol, the next chapter will be up same time tomorrow!**

**This chapter is a shout out to Rosalie, every one always makes her a bitch in their stories. I actually quite like her character, or at least i like the kind one thats portrayed here lol! **

**Review, tell me what you think.**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	17. The Observer

**Hello,**

**As promised, the new chapter. Picks off exactly from the last chapter's sentence. This entire chapter is pretty much just Rose and Bella talking, and you can understand why. Next chapter the others will be in it more.**

**Thank you to all my anonymous reviewers, as well as accounted ones. You guys keep me writing lol!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 17: The Observer

"_I've fallen in love with Jasper…"_

Rosalie clapped her hand over my mouth quickly.

I'd done it. I ruined our potentially great friendship. She didn't want me to keep going, she'd heard enough. I immediately regretted telling her. I was foolish, foolish to think that she would tell me it's okay -It wasn't. I was sleeping with her sister's husband, she couldn't condole that.

Rosalie opened her mouth to speak. She was going to scream at me, or scream for Alice. What had I done? I ruined everything.

"I know." She whispered softly, "But we can't talk here… not like this."

I was so shocked by her reply that all I could do was nod mutely to her, eyes wide.

Her eyes darted around the large room, inspecting for any movement. When she detected none, she hopped out from the bath swiftly, wrapping a robe around her dripping body.

"Here," She said, holding out a white, plush robe. "Put this on…"

Her tone of voice was hard to decipher, as were her emotions. I couldn't tell whether she was upset with me, or too distracted to register an emotion for what I just said.

Grabbing my hand roughly, she led me out of the bathroom and ran at top speed to the fourth level of the house. If I hadn't been so frightened of what Rosalie's response would be, I would have taken the time to notice the yet another beautiful level of this house. All I really noticed was that the walls were painted emerald green, and were too lined with golden paintings.

Rose pushed open to adjacent white doors and stepped inside the room, gesturing for me to do the same.

"This is better…" She mumbled under her breath, flicking the light switch on.

The room was fabulous! It had a large king bed in the centre with crimson red sheets which matched the feature wall. There was also a sixties styled phone next to the bed, complete with buttons you had to spin to dial. It didn't have much else in it, as we hadn't unpacked, but I saw two doors on opposite sides of the bed. I assumed one was a walk in robe, and the other a bathroom.

Rosalie flopped down on the enormous bed, patting the spot next to her and asking me to sit. I moved over slowly, cautious as to what more she had to say.

"You know…?" I asked slowly, knowing the answer would come out the same.

She nodded softly.

"I'm sorry about before, I just didn't want the others coming home early from the hunt and over hearing us. They could probably still hear us now, four levels up. But at least we'll know when they arrive home… Bella.." She sighed, "Do you think Alice already saw what you told me?"

I looked down at my lap shamefully. "No… I don't think she would have, I've… uh, I've kind of been keeping a block up between myself and Alice's vision. It works the same as it did with the wolves, so she… she wouldn't have seen you either…"

Rose looked at me knowingly, "Good."

I smiled cautiously at her, was she trying to comfort me or protect Alice?

I sighed loudly and swung backwards on the bed, resting my head against the pillows.

"I don't know how it got this far…" I said, running a hand through my wet hair.

Rosalie leant back and flopped her head on the pillow next to mine,

"Just start from the beginning…" She was smiling warmly at me. She **did** care for me. It wasn't just about helping Alice, Rose was genuinely interested in my well being and I was deeply touched.

"Where's the beginning?" I asked, mostly to myself, "I don't know how long this has been building. Since I was human? Just before my change? Or maybe its after, perhaps I'm just a different person now, too different to the one who fell in love with Edward…"

Rose turned onto her side so she was facing me, but didn't interrupt me.

I told her everything; about Jasper's jealousy from the beginning -long before we'd realized our true feelings for each other. I told her about Twister, and how we'd walked in on each other naked.

She didn't stop me or ask questions, she let me tell my story. A story that had been building for a long time and finally got its release. I finally told her about the 'hunts,' how we'd come across the human scent and Jasper had kissed me, only to have my mind collapse on itself from an overload of emotions, and finally -and a little reluctantly- I'd told her about how we'd made love under the moonlight, amongst the flower petals.

She awed me and every now and then would gasp, or crack a smile. By the end of it she looked like she was going to cry.

"And I love him…" I finished up, "More than anything in the world, but how did you know? How could you tell when no one else could?"

She smiled her small smile.

"What did you think of me when you first met me?" She asked, completely off topic.

"I don't know…" I answered, embarrassed. "What a knock out!" I said laughing, "I guess… I didn't really think about you too much. I always wished we could be friends though, that maybe one day you'd treat me like a sister instead of an intruder…"

I realized at that moment how easily Rose's eyes gave way to her emotions. Even without my ability, I could see through her golden iris' that she was deeply sorry.

"I'm truly sorry about the way I treated you," she said looking down. "It was cruel and unnecessary. I was being petty and jealous…"

I dismissed her apology fleetingly.

"It was a life time ago Rose, of course I forgive you."

She smiled timidly.

"My point is, no one particularly gives much thought to me. They either think I'm spoilt or self involved. Even Emmett sometimes… even though he'd never admit it, I can see it. He thinks I'm too obsessed with the little things; hair and clothes. But I see things. Because no one thinks past this pretty form" She said, gesturing to her body. "People see me as something to fantasize about -an illusion. So I see more than others do. I see the way you two are around each other, its unbelievable. It's like you gravitate towards each other. No one else but me seemed to notice. At first I thought it was just because Jasper was helping you with the hunt, but there were little things always popping up."

I was listening carefully. No one gave Rose the credit she deserved, she was so intuitive.

"Jasper was always the first one to help you with everything you did. When we played Twister, and you two were in that position, no one but me noticed that you two were hardly daring to breath around each other. I thought I was going crazy!" She said laughing. "And then just before, when you were sitting in each other's arms, the love was emanating off you in waves. Then when you saw the painting of Alice and Jasper in the hall your face just fell…"

"…And that's why you asked if it hurt.." I said, finally putting all the pieces together.

She nodded her head silently. "It wasn't hard to put together… the only thing I'm wondering is… when are you going to tell them?"

I rolled over and buried my face in the pillow. "I don't know… it's such a mess!" I said, my words muffled by fabric. I turned up to look her in the eye. "We want to tell them when Edward gets back from Italy, but I don't think I'm ready.. What if I can't do it, or what if they try to keep us apart?"

"You're thinking about this too much…" She said playing with my hair. "This is Edward and Alice we're talking about. Of course they'll be hurt, who wouldn't? But they'll still love you at the end of the day…"

"How can they?" I asked disbelievingly, "Too much has changed, things can't go back to how they were…"

She sighed, she knew it was true.

"I'm still glad that you told me, I'm happy that you trust me enough to tell me something this huge…"

I had made Rose happy? There was a time when my mere presence made her unhappy.

"I'm glad I finally got it off my chest. I love Jasper!" I said excitedly, "And I'm not ashamed of it… But please don't tell anyone!"

She laughed softly. "I won't, of course not…"

There was nothing more to say. Every last bit had been said. A comfortable silence settled over us, and for the first time since discovering my feelings for Jasper, I didn't feel like those feelings were wrong.

Our pleasant silence was broken by the incessant ringing of the home phone.

"We need to change that ring tone…" Rose muttered, reaching across me to grab the old phone.

"Hello?" She spoke seductively into the phone, making me smile.

I could hear a male on the other end, the connection was pretty faulty.

"Edward!" She said with false excitement, "Bella? Oh.. She's uh…"

I shook my head at her silently. I couldn't handle talking to the man who loved me so dearly. I was frightened I would burst into unreleased tears once more.

"..Oh she went for a hunt… Yes, just me at home. It really is a beautiful place here, you'll love it! …Okay, I'll be sure to tell her, yes… give Carlisle my love.."

She hung up the phone and turned to face me.

"They've just arrived now at the airport. He said they're going to drive up to Volterra in the morning… and he sends his love…"

I cringed inwardly. I didn't deserve his love.

"Come on," She said pulling my hand. "We need to cheer up, and I have just the solution…"

I looked at her questioningly.

"I promise, you'll have fun! And perhaps you should relinquish that little barrier you've got between us and Alice, so she can see us having some fun…"

I nodded and grabbed her hand and she ran me to the stair well, "Hop on!" She said gesturing to the rail.

"We're going to slide down four levels of stair handles? That actually **does** sound fun!" I said excitedly.

"Please, this isn't what I was talking about. This is just a great way to travel!" She said laughing and disappearing out of view, down the railing.

I followed soon after her, legs on either side of the rail, as we raced down the polished railing bar. It was exhilarating. I didn't think it would be, being vampires. But it was just as fun as if I were human again. I came to the last level laughing loudly, to find Rose scrimmaging through some of the unpacked boxes.

"Aha!" She said, pulling out two swim suits.

"We're going swimming?!" I asked skeptically.

"In the pacific ocean!" She said proudly, "It's not like its too cold for us! And we don't have to worry about drowning, we can be like mermaids!" She said laughing.

I laughed at her childish mannerisms and I grabbed one of the swim suits, putting it on quickly under my robe.

I followed Rose through the kitchen as she dove through the beautiful patio with the large fountain. I decided that this would mine and Jasper's place. A place we could come to relax and rewind from everything. I looked up to find Rosalie had opened a door at the back that I didn't know existed.

"Come on little one," She said smiling, "Welcome to the big blue…"

I stepped past her and I almost fell down in shock. Right in front of my feet was the pacific ocean. It stretched out for hundreds of miles and all I could see was blue, it was magnificent. The sand at my feet stuck to my skin, covering it in a sheen glitter. It was autumn, so I assumed no one but vampires really **could** swim here.

"Its beautiful isn't it?" Rosalie asked, making more of a statement than a question.

"It's surreal…" I replied, moving into the still water. The waves were crashing further down the beach towards the cliff faces, and the spray off the rock was indescribable. The entire place was wonderful, but this was truly something special. I slipped deep below the surface, only to find Rose had done the same.

I broke the surface and took in a deep breath of unnecessary air.

"Thank you Rose… for everything…"

She smiled at me warmly. "I'm glad I could help…"

As we drifted through the currents under the starry sky, I could hear the distant steps of our family returning.

"See, I told you I saw them here…" Alice said proudly, obviously having seen us in a vision.

I looked up to find Esme, Emmett, Alice and Jasper stepping into the ocean fully clothed as they washed away the dirt and blood from their skin.

Esme swam up to me, graceful as a mermaid. "Are you feeling better my child?" She asked, drifting along side me.

I nodded at her, "Yes, thank you."

The others followed suit, and as my family drifted together under the moon, I felt Jasper's hand wrap around mine and some of the wounds of my guilt began to heal…

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	18. Discovered

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Chapter 18: Discovered

The water lapped over my feet as my family lay together on the shore staring at the sky.

Sunrise was not far off, flickers of light began to play across the horizon, signally that the sun would break over at any minute.

"Good hunt?" I asked to no one in particular.

Four voices resonated over the silence, all agreeing that the local parks and forest provided a wide array of animals.

"It was sick!" Sounded Emmett's booming voice, "A brown **and** a black bear, I mean what are the odds!?"

I laughed at my older brother's strict appetite. He enjoyed bears so much, he was willing to prolong hunting until he found them.

I wondered if I would ever have that; The ability to distinguish an animal by its smell. It had been decades and still Jasper had not mastered the skill, what chance did I have? Of course Jasper had his favorite animal, but like me he worked purely on instinct. He saw an animal; he took it. He didn't wait for his preferred one to walk by.

We had swum for most of the night, drifting like lifeless bodies under the fluorescent moonlight. It was truly a magical place here, so much different than Forks. We weren't pestered by the constant rain and sleet, the weather here was overcast, but never dreary. Yet I had still not had the chance to sparkle like a diamond in the sun. It was irritating, the one thing I was really looking forward to in this unlife, and I hadn't had the chance of yet to do it.

I watched a sliver of light peep over the horizon, as if wary to show itself. I laughed to myself, perhaps today would be a sunny day after all. I decided I would spend the day outside if it was. I would lay down in the sun and let the rays warm my cold body.

I felt oddly light, as if a weight had been lifted from my shoulders…

Funny, I though to myself. The one member of the family you never got along with, is the one who helps you most in your after life…

Rosalie had been a true saint to me. I would have expected her to be least forgiving, but she had proved me wrong last night, and for that I was eternally grateful.

At last the distant semi circle of the sun began to rise slowly. Brilliant rays of red and orange flew out across the darkened sky, illuminating the silhouette of the surrounding cliff faces and trees.

I sat up and leant back on my hands.

"What a beautiful moment…" I uttered softly, though I was quite sure the entire family would have heard.

Jasper sat up next to me and put one arm around my shoulder, "I'm glad our family could share this moment with you…" He said, giving my shoulder a small squeeze.

It was getting easier to show signs of affection around each other. A hug here and there, no one would detect it as romantic. I wasn't sure if it was wishful thinking on my part, but it was as if the family was beginning to recognize us as perhaps more than friends. Even Alice was acting less jittery around us, last night we swam together for hours just talking, but no one tried to interrupt us or join in; they let us be.

"What's on the agenda today?" Alice asked jumping up.

I laughed at her, was she so incapable of relaxing for more than an hour?

"Well I believe we have an entire household worth of things to unpack…" Esme stated, gesturing her head to the still unpacked cars and moving truck.

Alice sighed loudly, flopping back down on her hands. "Can't that wait? I for one believe that Bella has hardly any clothes packed… and the way she's going I think she'll have all but run out in a few days.." Alice replied, winking at me.

Esme laughed at her second youngest daughter, "Fine, You and Rosalie can go to the shops and buy some supplies, the rest of us will get the house into shape."

"Alice, you know I can't go shopping when my room looks like it does!" Rosalie said, obviously referring to a past move.

"Fine," Alice huffed. "I'll go by myself… Bella I can't wait till you can stand to be around humans again…"

I laughed at her, then moved over to give her a hug.

"What kind of retail would there be in a place like this anyway?" I asked, ruffling her hair.

"For your information dear Bella," She said smiling and patting down her hair. "There happen to be three women's boutiques, two department stores and five shoe outlets."

"I stand corrected!" I said laughing, "That's quite a lot for a town with just over two hundred people."

Alice nodded absent mindedly, "Well we've got a few hours till the shops open, so why don't I show you to your new room Bella?"

I jumped up ecstatically, I hadn't even given a thought to which room would be mine. I prayed that it was on the same level as Jasper -and by the expression on his face, I presumed he was thinking the same thing.

"Come on then girl!" Emmett suddenly boomed excitedly, "We'll race you to the third level!" And with that he jumped on Alice's shoulders yelling 'giddy up horsey!'

The sight of a mammoth like Emmett on Alice's tiny form was unbelievably absurd. Esme was the first to burst out laughing, and the rest of soon followed. Emmett however, took his job as jockey very seriously, so he slapped Alice on the rear once more as she took off running toward the house.

"Come on then little chicken," Jasper mocked, pulling me on his back. "Hold on!"

I wrapped my arms around as his neck and buried my face into his neck, inhaling his scent and making him shiver.

I could see Alice heading around the side and running towards the front door, I expected us to do the same, but instead Jasper headed to the side of the house, and stopped in front of the vine covered sand stone.

"You're not afraid of a little climbing are you?" Jasper asked, gripping the thick vines in between his hands.

"Be careful," I said, burying my face deeper.

I felt our bodies swing off the wall, jumping from balcony to balcony, always going higher.

_My god…_ I thought to myself, _He really is like Tarzan…_

"There we go," He said, jumping onto a balcony three stories up and pushing the glass doors open.

I stepped in softly, careful not to dirty up the carpet with my sandy feet.

"This is my room?" I asked, taking in the large expanse of space.

"…Well, your's and… Edwards." He replied, looking at the floor.

I moved to comfort him, but at that moment; Alice and a gleeful looking Emmett burst through the door, high-fiveing each other.

Emmett turned to face us wide eyed.

"Oh man! How did you beat us!?" He asked, searching the room with his eyes for an answer.

"Vines," Jasper stated simply, a little disgruntled by the fact we were standing in mine and Edward's room.

But what a room it was. It was the kind of bedroom I'd dreamt about as a little girl, a room fit for a princess. The walls were a delicate blue color, framed by cream colored panels. There was a large four poster bed in the centre, with a cream, embroidered doona and pillows. My beautiful balcony, which after re-evaluation, I realized looked over the pacific ocean.

I rushed over to the first adjoining door and opened it to discover a large ensuite bathroom, complete with spa bath.

"Oh my god!" I gasped as I ran my hand over the large, marble tub and caught my own reflection in the mirror that occupied nearly an entire wall.

I left the bathroom and opened up the next door, only to discover a walk in robe almost as large as the room itself.

"Alice, how will I possibly fill this entire wardrobe with clothes!?" I asked flabbergasted.

"Well Edward's clothes will be in here too silly!" She said, pointing her finger to brain as if to imply I had none.

I laughed at her, then grabbed her hand and jumped with her on the enormous bed.

"Thank you Alice, I love it!" I screamed joyfully, rolling off the bed and onto the carpet.

"Well, Jasper helped pick it out too.." She said shamefully, wishing that the praise could all be on her.

I looked over at Jasper, but he was looking down sheepishly at his feet.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I cried, jumping into his arms unexpectedly.

He grunted at the sudden impact and we fell to the ground laughing.

"I didn't help with the room, but do I still get a hug?" Emmett asked, arms open.

I laughed at his child like jealousy and jumped to his side, wrapping my arms around his large torso and kissing him on the cheek. Jasper sent me a wave of jealousy and so I relinquished my hold on Emmett and sent him back a wave of love. He smiled timidly at me and mouthed 'thanks.'

"Okay enough childish banter now, will you please come down and help unpack?" Came Esme's motherly voice from downstairs.

I took one last look at my beautiful new room, then rushed out of the room, sliding down the stair handle, the same as I had yesterday with Rose.

I slid all the way down the railing and sipped off the end, throwing myself right into a box laden Rosalie.

The box went cluttering to the ground, along with the many belongings inside.

Not quite accustomed to the new Rosalie, I immediately began apologizing profusely, muttering under my breath how clumsy I was, I guess I hadn't changed that much after all.

Rose laughed her soft, musical laugh.

"Bella, please! Stop apologizing, its just a few books from the study. Nothing broke, or tore, everything is okay."

I smiled at her softly.

"Sorry, I suppose I'm not quite use to this Rose…" I answered truthfully.

She put out her had and I took it, hoisting myself up right.

"I know you can't forgive me straight away for how I treated you… but I **have** changed…" She said softly, brushing her hands on her sarong.

"I know you have, really!" I said, regretting my earlier slip of words.

She smiled at me, picking up her spilt books and gathering them in a box.

"Bella, I…"

Rosalie stopped talking and stared at something over my shoulder.

I turned around to find Alice standing at the edge of the stairs, shoulders hunched, emotions pouring out; sadness, rejection and… was there acceptance?

She lifted her head slowly and looked me straight in the eyes.

"I'm off to go shopping, but Bella… before I go, um… I was wondering if we could talk?"

She knew. Oh god she knew! We had slipped up somewhere and she had discovered the truth. My mind was screaming at me to say no. Think of some excuse, get out of there! But my foolish body followed Alice, as she walked out the front door and into the surrounding forest.

Alice threw herself against a tree and slumped down its thick trunk. She held her face in her arms, then slowly lifted her head to look at me. Her eyes no longer held their usual bright sparkle and happiness, and her mouth seemed to be permanently etched into a frown.

She sighed loudly, kicking the loose earth with her toe.

"It's about Jasper…"

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	19. Truth

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Chapter 19: Truth

"_It's about Jasper…"_

Even though my heart was still and cold, I felt as though it would burst out of my chest. My breathing became shallow and strained as I fought to remain conscience.

Alice had brought me out here… alone. She knew, it was the only explanation.

"Bella…" She sighed and threw me a crippling wave of sadness. "I need to say this… and I need you to listen to me, please don't interrupt me till I've finished."

She looked at me for a reply, but my throat had all but dried up, so I nodded stiffly at her.

"Everything has changed…" She said, standing up and leaning against the thick trunk. "It's been a long time coming… I guess I didn't really want to face up to it…"

I nodded again, not sure where she was going with this.

She stepped closer to me so that we were about a foot apart and stared me in the eyes.

"Jasper doesn't love me anymore."

My insides were tying themselves into knots and my entire body was shaking madly as I struggled to stand up right.

"…He loves you." She finished up, turning back around to face the trees.

"Oh Alice-"

"Please." She cut me off, spinning around again. "Please, just let me finish."

"It's not something I just suspect," She continued, "it's something I know… He hasn't been himself for a while now. I tried to ignore it at first, I thought maybe he was just distracted from helping you, but as time passed he didn't change. It was like he was this empty shell when you weren't around. Then when you were near him, his entire persona would change; It was like he was walking around on this euphoric cloud, always laughing and smiling."

I slumped down to the moist ground. She knew everything, there was no point in denying it.

Alice sighed, then slumped onto the ground next to me.

"…I don't **blame** you Bella… it's just…" She groaned, frustrated with the situation. "I was trying to understand it… I kept thinking 'it's me, I'm repulsing him!' But I couldn't have done anything differently, I couldn't have changed it… he loves you."

I looked up at her, but she was staring straight ahead, trying to figure something out. She turned her head slowly to face me.

"…And you love him."

It wasn't a question, it was a statement.

"…Yes." I whispered out hoarsely.

She put her head between her knees, concealing her face from me. I didn't need to read her expression to see how she was feeling. Every emotion hit me like a ton of bricks, as her tiny figure shook with the sobs of sadness.

I tentatively put my arms around her torso, holding her tightly towards me. I half expected her to slap me away, but she sunk into my body, crying all her sorrows away. I put my face into her hair and sobbed my words of sorry. I apologized for me, for Jasper, for everyone who would be hurt by this.

We sat there for what felt like hours, holding each other and crying all the pain and sorrow out. I hated that I was crying. This was Alice's moment of distress, I shouldn't have been dragging my issues into it.

It began to rain softly, so we pulled apart from each other and lay our heads down in the mud.

"I'm so sorry Alice…" I whispered for the hundredth time that morning.

She rolled onto her side to face me. Her eyes were puffy from unreleased tears and her mouth was set in a soft frown.

"We can't help who we fall in love with…" She sighed, pushing my hair behind my ear. "…I don't hate you Bella, I need you to know that. In fact a large part of me still loves you like a sister. But I'm in a place right now where I still need time to forgive you…"

"Of.. of course…" I stuttered out. "You've already been much kinder than I deserve.. I took your husband"

"No…" She replied, staring past me. "You can't take, what wasn't really mine." She sighed loudly, "There was a time where we meant the world to each other, but that time has long passed…"

I nodded softly, unsure of what to say.

"Can I ask you something Alice?" I asked, staring into the soft rain.

"…Shoot." She sighed, rolling onto her back.

"How did you know? I mean… I know you suspected something, but what confirmed it?"

She chuckled softly, which was the last thing I expected. I rolled over to face her, confused by what she found amusing.

"I had a vision." She breathed out, closing her eyes to the rain.

Visions, of course. I had let down the barrier when Rose and I had gone for a swim, she must have seen… But Jasper and I hadn't done anything... Had we? No, I was positive we hadn't, the most we'd done was hold hands.

"Bella, it was in the future…" She continued, answering my unasked question. "Nothing you had done yet, but something to come…"

I mentally chided myself for never having thought of that. Just because Jasper and I hadn't done anything presently, didn't mean we wouldn't in the future. Once we had decided on something, Alice would have seen the future of that decision.

"At first I couldn't understand what I was seeing," Alice continued. "It seemed like such a pointless vision, just another family day inside. We were watching a movie, but then I noticed how we were seated.. Or rather, how **you** were seated. You were sitting in Jasper's lap, you're legs were entwined. I don't think you were even really watching the movie," She laughed, "You seemed too enthralled by each other…"

She turned to face me, "You looked so happy…" She smiled slightly, but a soft sob escaped her lips.

"I'm so sorry Alice…" I said, rubbing her shoulder.

"Don't be," She replied, closing her eyes once more. "It shows me that things get better… I'll forgive you Bella. I don't know when that day is, but it will come.."

I smiled at that piece of information. I didn't want to hurt Alice, or Edward.

Edward?

"Alice?" I asked suddenly curious, "How was Edward in this vision? Was he still there? Please tell me he was there…"

"Oh Edward…" She said sighing. "Yes, he was there… but he was different. He loves you so much Bella, I don't know how this will affect him… I don't want to see how things will turn out when you tell him… I don't even want the details recounted to me."

"I understand," I replied, sloshing my head back in the dirt. "But he's there… that's got to count for something."

"Yes, I think he'll move on… there's a vision, just a wisp of a thought. It changes too often for me to see, but he's happy in this wisp. He's talking to someone I can't quite make out…"

"Good." I replied earnestly, "I want him to be happy."

I breathed out deeply, sitting up on my hands. "How did everything get this far?" I asked, not expecting an answer.

"People change…" She said, sitting up next to me, "The **only** thing constant in life is change. It's the one thing we can trust to be true."

"But if people are hurt so deeply by change, why change at all?" I asked, frustrated with the consistency of change.

"Could you have?" She asked, looking me in the eyes.

"Could I have what?" I asked confused.

"**Not** changed? How could you have just returned to Edward when you love Jasper so deeply?"

She was right. I would have done it no matter who go hurt.

"You're right," I said honestly. "But I'm still sorry you got hurt…"

We lay back down on the dirt and just stared up at the sky. A comfortable silence settled over us. I was glad Alice knew now, I didn't feel like I was living a lie. She had taken it remarkably well, I had expected her to shout and scream at me for taking away her husband… but she had remained civil.

A soft patter of foot steps alerted both Alice and I that someone was drawing near. We sat up quickly, dazed from lying down for so long.

Jasper stepped softly from behind a tree.

"There you guys are," He muttered quietly, running a hand through his wet, golden locks.

My heart immediately jumped at the sight of him, but I didn't dare act on it. Why rub salt in Alice's freshly opened wounds…

I looked over to find Alice smiling softly, she seemed to be thinking pretty hard. She laughed to herself, which left me even more confused. Had she seen another vision?

She stepped up quickly, brushing her muddy hands on her pants.

"I'll be inside…" She whispered softly, kissing my forehead. I was so touched by her sentiment and understanding that a quiet sob escaped me, and she smiled at me. "When you want to tell the others, tell me… I'd like to be there."

She walked over to Jasper, and I saw the tiniest amount of spring return to her step.

She wrapped her arms around Jasper and kissed him softly on the lips, whispering against them, "Don't hurt her…" Then she was gone.

"Don't hurt her?" Jasper asked, moving over to sit next to me.

"She knows…" I answered simply. "She had a vision of us in the future…"

I watched as Jasper's face absorbed the information.

"I'm sorry you had to deal with that alone…" He said, holding my hands in his lap.

"I wouldn't have wanted it any other way," I answered honestly. "She was distraught, of course, but she understands… She knows that we love each other."

I leaned into his chest as he kissed my face and forehead.

"So, we're going to tell the others now then?" He asked, running his fingers over my arms.

"Rosalie already knows, But yes, we should tell Esme and Emmett now…" I replied, lifting my head and kissing him softly on the lips. I meant to only kiss him lightly, but the minute our lips touched, a fire ignited under my lips and I threw my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to me. Jasper moaned into my mouth and pushed us back against the ground, his hands fumbling to the front of my bathers. I laughed against his lips and pushed him away from me softly.

"I promised myself that the nest time we made love would be in a bed!" I said laughing.

He chuckled deeply, pulling me on once more for a quick kiss.

"Lets get this over with then," He said standing, and helping me to my feet.

I took his hand as we walked back slowly to our new home. I took a deep breath when we reached the front door and pushed it open slowly. Jasper took my hand in his and breathed his cool breath over my face.

"It'll be fine. Alice **and** Rose already know, Esme will just be happy we're happy and… well Emmett may be a little indifferent to the situation, but he'll come around…"

He smiled, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. He was scared. So was I, scared of losing my family, of ruining everything I had worked so hard to gain.

Alice was sitting in a pile of boxes, pushed together like a fort. I found the whole thing rather odd, but the Emmett popped up from behind Alice and everything suddenly made sense.

"Hey Bells, Jasper, come inside my castle!" He said in all seriousness.

I laughed at his child like imagination and politely declined his invitation.

"Emmett, I was wondering if Jasper and I could talk to you… Esme too," I said a little louder, although I was sure she would have heard it even if I had whispered it.

Alice, understanding, nodded and climbed from her cardboard fort. Leaning against one of the marble columns.

"There you are Bella!" Esme said coming downstairs, closely followed by Rose. "I was beginning to worry…"

"I'm sorry mum, I was just talking to Alice." I replied, using Esme's favorite word; 'mum.'

Her face brightened immediately, and she sat down against the stairs. "So what did you guys want to talk about?" She asked, removing her cleaning gloves and placing them on her lap.

I looked over at Jasper and he squeezed my hand. I noticed Alice was staring at our hands, she was smiling, but her eyes were sad.

"Okay, I'm just going to come out and say it…" I started. My breathing was becoming erratic again as I struggled to calm myself.

"Oh my god!" Emmett boomed, "Are you gay?!"

I burst out laughing despite myself, "No Emmett! I am not gay. But… something **has** changed…"

Esme looked suddenly concerned, "You can tell us sweet heart, what is it?"

I wanted to run and hide, Jasper could deal with this, I could come out later. But the logical, more responsible side told me to just let it out.

"Jasperandiareinlove!" It came out in a rush and I prayed to god that no one understood it.

"You're in… love?" Emmett asked, his happy demeanor once again replaced by an ill fitting serious one.

Esme didn't speak at all. Her face was just in shock, as her mouth opened, then closed, then opened it again a few times before she actually spoke up.

"Of course I'm happy for the both of you," She said kindly, "but Alice how are you dealing with this?" She asked, picking herself up from the stairs and making her way to stand beside Alice.

Alice smiled a small smile and gave her mother a kiss on the cheek.

"That's why I wanted to be here when Bella told you," She said, looking at Emmett and Esme. "To prove to you that I'm okay with this. It hurts, I mean of course I does, But this is something that none of us could have predicted. Love isn't always fair, its just love." She finished up, looking Jasper in the eyes.

"You know a part of me will always love you, right Al?" Jasper said, releasing my hand and picking Alice up in a vice grip hug.

She sobbed against his shoulder, but she was smiling.

"I love you too Jazz," She said kissing him on the cheek.

He pulled back from her and brushed her cheek with his thumb, "I never wanted to hurt you.."

"I know," She replied, taking his hand in hers. "But with every door that closes a window opens."

"What do you mean?" He asked laughing.

"Well now instead of a husband, I have a loving older brother. It doesn't sound like a bad situation to me!" Alice said optimistically.

He smiled, hugging her once more.

"Oh Alice," He said chuckling into her ear. "You're forever the optimist."

"Well sweet then!" Emmett said rather finally. "If Alice is okay, I'm okay!" And with that said, he jumped back into his cardboard fort, peeping his head over the edge as if scanning the perimeter for intruders.

"One more thing," I said, moving to sit on the edge of Emmett's castle. "I'd like it if you could all keep this to yourself… just until I speak with Edward."

"Of course," Esme replied, moving over to kiss me on my cheek.

I looked over to get a response from Emmett, but he simply saluted me, saying 'Yes sir!' In a very obedient, army style tone.

"I know that couldn't have been easy my dear," Esme said tenderly. "But I am very happy that you told me… and I'm happy for the both of you.."

If I had been human I would have cried, but I simply nodded at Esme and wrapped my arms around her neck, whispering thank you to her repeatedly.

The rest of the family proceeded to retreat to different sections of the house. Rosalie offered to spend the day shopping with Alice, to which I presumed she could spend some time fussing and comforting her sister. Alice accepted the invitation graciously and the two left hand in hand, towards the BMW.

"Do you feel better?" Jasper asked, pulling me towards the stairs.

"I do," I answered honestly. "So much more free, like I can breath easily now."

"I feel the same way.." He answered, giving me a chaste kiss on the lips.

"Well I think this is cause for celebration, don't you?" Jasper asked enthusiastically, winking quickly.

"Mr. Whitlock!" I asked, feigning utter shock and horror, "What exactly did you have in mind?"

He laughed a low, menacing laugh before lifting me up into his arms and running top speed up the stairs to my room…

_Our_ Room.

**I felt weird about this chapter. I don't think its bad, I liked the beginning… It feels just a bit kind of rushed!**

**Anyway, I needed them to find out sooner or later, sorry if it seemed rushed.**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	20. Comfort

**I went one day without posting! Hahaha, terribly sorry to those of you that didn't expect it… you have been getting very spoilt lol!**

**On with the story…**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 20: Comfort

We moved up the stairs quickly, jumping from level to level. I could feel Jasper's impatience mixed with a sum of guilt.

We finally jumped through the double doors, locking them in a vain attempt of privacy. If any one of the family members wanted to get in, a locked door would prove no obstacle.

I moved over towards the large four poster bed, dragging Jasper with me. When we finally plopped down roughly on the soft mattress, Jasper sighed loudly and put his face in his hands. His back began to shake and shiver as his body rocked with sadness.

"Did you feel it?" He asked looking up at me, eyes filled with sadness.

"Did I feel what?" I asked, attempting to comfort him by running my hand over his back.

"Alice." He stated simply, running a hand through his disheveled hair. "It felt like she was dying inside. Her emotions… I've never felt anything like that. And.. Ugh!"

He punched his hand through the bed head, snapping the mahogany wood in half.

"I DID THAT TO HER!" He said, nearly screaming. "I MADE HER FEEL LIKE THAT."

"**We** did that to her…" I replied, lifting his chin up so that he looked me in the eyes. "WE, as in US! I feel terrible too, but she understands. She may not be able to forgive us yet, but she does understand… We didn't plan to hurt her."

"But we did." He said simply. His emotions were changing drastically, from sadness to anger. But it was fair, I didn't relish in hurting Alice either, why was he acting like this.

"Do you think that I wanted to this?" I asked jumping up form the bed. "If you think Alice took it badly, how do you think Edward's going to take it? He loves me more than anything in the entire world, he waited over a hundred years for me!?"

"And what? I meant nothing to Alice?" He snapped, moving closer to me.

"That's not what I meant…" I said softly, putting my hands over his shoulders.

He swatted them of lightly and sat back down on the bed, running his fingers over arms.

I sighed and sat down next to him as he started to sob softly.

"…Jasper I.. I'm sorry…"

He turned sharply and put his head into my chest, sobbing into my skin. I ran my fingers through his hair as he lifted his head slowly to look me in the eyes. He looked from eyes to my lips and kissed me forcefully.

"Jas-Jasper," I struggled against his hard lips. "Maybe we shouldn't.. If you're feeling like this.."

"Please." He said resting his forehead against mine. "Please… Just help me forget…"

He was so upset, I'd never seen him like this. It was all I could do not to sob with him, so I kissed him back. He responded eagerly and kissed me hard, moving his lips roughly against mine.

"Put the barrier up." He said, kissing down my neck and across my chest.

"…But Alice… She already kno-"

"Do you want her to see this?" He asked, still angry.

I understood immediately and pushed the barrier up between us and her vision.

"It's done." I said, pushing him off my slightly.

"Good.. Thank you," he replied, pushing us back down on the bed.

A part of me didn't want to go through with this, but Jasper needed comforting and I knew that I would do anything to make him forget.

He unbuttoned his shirt throwing it to the floor, as I ran my fingers over the planes of his chest. He kissed over my stomach removing the top of my bathers and throwing it onto the growing pile of clothes.

His body shook with guilt as he pulled his belt roughly from his jeans and a soft sob escaped his lips. I kissed him softly to silence his sadness and he kissed me back, letting a little of the happy Jasper I loved so much seep through. I felt his tongue nudge at my lips and I gasped at the contact, at which he took as the opportunity to slip his tongue in and kiss me deeply.

I moved my hands to the front of his jeans and unzipped the zipper moving my hands to his underwear. He growled into my skin. He didn't even try to be graceful with my bikini bottoms, he ripped them in two and threw them across the room, Running his hands over my legs and over my stomach to my breasts. I moaned, arching my back and hitting his underwear clad crutch, to which he groaned and dug back in forcefully.

"Please," He begged, kissing my earlobe and cheek bone.

I answered his request and ripped the tiny piece of fabric from his hips, tossing it to the corner and throwing my arms behind his neck.

He nudged my legs open cautiously with his knees and stared at me in the eyes, holding my back in his arms.

"I love you," he whispered, nearly all traces of guilt diminished. Then he pushed through, entwining our legs together.

I gasped loudly, to which he muffled my cry with his mouth and forced his tongue in kissing me roughly. He moved at constant pace always hitting the right spot. I could feel my release building more and more as his hands explored the contours of my body, leaving no skin untouched.

I moved my head over his shoulder, digging my nails into his back, to which he groaned loudly and thrusted hard against me. That was the last straw for me as I felt my body become overtaken by rolls of pleasure, as my back arched into Jasper and he too became over come by pleasure as he moaned into my mouth, collapsing on top of me, spent.

We lay together for a few minutes while Jasper stroked my hair, kissing me softly and whispering sweet nothings into my ears.

"I'm so sorry…" He whispered, running his hands over my naked body.

"For what?" I asked curiously.

"For behaving like that… like you were something to be used, just to make me feel better…"

I kissed him hard, I didn't want him feeling like that.

"I wanted to help you…" I said, kissing butterfly kisses over his chest and stomach. "I think we both needed a release…"

He looked deeply into my eyes before kissing me once more. His emotions had reeled in a little, there was no longer anger, just sadness mixed with relief.

Something in my memory tugged at my minds strings. Relief. A memory so close but I couldn't quite grasp it, was it important?

_Edward's emotions were so depressing that I immediately felt terrible for wishing he would leave. However, underneath the many sad emotions that were orbiting around him, there was one that confused me. It was relief._

That was it! The day Edward left for Italy he had felt relieved. I had never had time to wonder about it, but now, thinking over the situation -why had he been relieved?

"What are you thinking about?" Jasper asked, noticing the crease of concentration in my forehead.

I sighed and sat up, wrapping the comforter around my body.

"The day Edward left… we were standing at the entrance and I remembered being confused because he was… well, relieved." I said, sounding out my troubling question.

"Huh," Jasper replied, thinking on what I had just said. "That is odd… well perhaps he was just… or maybe because…" But Jasper couldn't think of anything. There was no reasonable explanation for why Edward would be relieved to leave my presence, or go to Italy.

"There must have been some reason, lets not worry about it." Jasper continued, kissing my forehead.

I nodded, still slightly distracted.

There was the noise of thumping footsteps followed by a rough bang on the door, it caused Jasper to jump from the bed quickly, slipping on his jeans.

I laughed at his attempt of nonchalance to which I received a disapproving stare which just made me laugh harder.

"Jasper!? You in there?" Came Emmett's loud voice.

"Uh…Just a minute…" Jasper replied, buttoning up the jeans.

Emmett' large form burst through the door, but he stopped still when he saw what he'd walk in on.

"That's gonna take some getting used to…" He muttered, scratching his head.

If I had been human I would have blushed furiously, instead I put my head under the covers, concealing my face from further embarrassment.

Emmett's emotions were mirroring those of Jasper's not minutes ago. Sad, a little angry and confused. The fact that we'd hurt Emmett dealt a huge blow to my emotions. He was usually such a happy, fun loving person, And the fact that we'd made him otherwise only increased my guilt.

"Look… man, uh… I'll be outside when you're done, I just wanted to see…if"

Emmett didn't finish the sentence. Instead I heard his loud footsteps thump away slowly -Even his walk was depressing.

I heard the doors close and I peeped my head over the covers.

"That wasn't good…" I stated, hopping out of bed and running to my cupboard, only to discover that once again; I had no clothes.

"Here," Jasper said, holding out his dark blue button down shirt.

I thanked him and slipped the overly large shirt over my small body.

"I'm going to go talk to him," Jasper said, leaning in and kissing me. "He's going to have a harder time with this than he makes out. He hates the family fighting…"

I nodded quickly, "Of course, you should take some time just to talk… try and explain things…"

He smiled meekly and left the room, leaving the door slightly ajar.

_Well…_ I thought to myself, _You've successfully torn apart a happy family, what's next on the agenda?_

I circled the room a few times before deciding on something to which I was glad Jasper wouldn't have to witness. I sat back down on the large bed, crossing my legs and picking up the cordless phone.

I typed the number I had memorized so many years ago and waiting for the familiar ring.

_Ring, ring._

No answer,

_Ring, ring, ring._

Still silence.

_Ring, ring, ri-_

"Hello?" Came a hoarse voice

I opened my mouth to speak, even though I knew I couldn't say a word.

"Hello? Is any one there?"

I breathed into the phone softly, just so I could hear the voice once more.

"I can hear that there's someone there! Hello!? …Fine!"

The connection cut and I heard the familiar dial tone ring out.

_Oh Charlie…_ I thought desperately. There weren't many things I missed from my human life, but Charlie was certainly one of them.

We had to fake my death. I didn't want to have to give the annual phone calls every year; Saying college was fine, but I could never visit. It would have been too much and I knew I would have caved. We'd made a story that both Edward and I had died in a car accident while on our honey moon in France. We **did** go to France for our honey moon, but we rarely even drove any where. The family had wanted to move straight after that, why risk being seen when I was meant to be dead? But I was adamant about waking up after my change in the place I'd called home for the last few years.

I wasn't even permitted to watch my own 'funeral,' in case I was seen, or I left a scent. The wolves of course didn't buy the lie, but Carlisle spoke to them and told them we had already left -disappeared without a trace from the family. Sam was outraged, he swore that if we ever came back he would tear both Edward and I apart -not that he could ever really check. My scent was all over the Cullen mansion anyway, the fact that it stayed fresh didn't mean anything.

I sighed at the memory I wanted to forget most of all. Charlie without me. How he dealt with the news was beyond me, I could never go to check. I just tried to remain positive for the family and a part of me was happy.

I looked down at the phone and prepared to dial my next number.

I punched the familiar keys in and waited for the connection.

_Ring, ring… Ring, rin-_

"Hello?"

**So, why do we think Edward was relieved?**

**Lets try and branch off from the whole 'secret affair with Alice' thing lol!**

**Review and let me know what you think.**

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	21. Alone

**Hello all!**

**You had some very good theories for Edward's relief. A few of you got it right, but I'm not going to say who… you know who you are lol!**

**I know all the characters are a little angsty at the moment, but I can't just make them snap out of it lol, this chapter is pretty much the same lol… sorry!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 21: Alone

"_Hello?"_

I opened my mouth to speak, but my breathing hitched as the voice on the other end rang out.

"Hello? Alice, is that you?"

I cleared my throat loudly, and answered.

"No Edward, it's Bella."

"Bella?!"

His voice sounded so concerned and surprised.

"Bella, It's two in the morning, shouldn't you…"

His voice trailed off and I heard him chuckle softly, then sigh.

"For a minute there I expected you to be asleep in bed…"

He laughed again and I swear I could almost **hear** him pinching the bridge of his nose.

"No," I laughed awkwardly. "No sleep for me anymore…"

"So what's up? Is something wrong?" He asked -voice drenched in concern.

"No everything's fine here… I was just wondering how everything's going on your end…" I replied, making idle conversation while I pondered how to phrase my next question.

"…It's good," He answered warily, obviously suspicious as to the real reason behind my call. "It's hard, without you here…" He continued, lowering his voice. "Everything seems to remind me of you, but then I keep telling myself '4 more days, just 4 more days…'"

I laughed softly, while my heart was ripping itself to shreds in my chest.

"Listen… Edward," I began. "There's been something I've been meaning to ask you. It might be something stupid, but it's just been bothering me…"

When I said no more, he prodded; his curiosity spiked.

"Yesss, go on…" He replied, getting impatient.

I sighed loudly into the receiver, then continued.

"The day you and Carlisle left for Italy… There was something about your emotions that troubled me.."

I heard him take a sharp intake of breath, which only encouraged me further.

"You were… well.."

_Be delicate Bella,_ My mind chided.

"You were a little relieved… and I was just wondering why that was?"

I heard nothing on the other end except for a soft and steady breathing.

"Edward?" I asked, checking he was still there.

Silence.

"Edward, I can hear your breathing. I know you're there!" I said anxiously.

"Bella listen, I'd love to talk but Aro just invited every one back in… I've got to go, give every one my love,"

"Edward?!"

I realized I was shouting into the receiver, but he was being unreasonable. Why wouldn't he answer my question, was the answer really that bad?

There was silence for a few seconds, but the connection was still prominent. I heard rustling and a soft sigh before the dial tone rang out once more.

I threw the phone across the room, evidently smashing it into pieces that scattered across the room.

I threw myself back on the bed, sinking deep beneath the covers. I was out of energy and I was irritated. I quickly relinquished the hold I had on Alice's vision, and I felt a small portion of energy return to me. I could figure this out, I just had to think over it.

_You know what was weird…_ My mind questioned, _The fact that he expected you to be asleep. He's not even in the same time zone as you, and yet he knows what the time is here?_

The more I thought about it, the more I couldn't quite figure it out. I had been a vampire for a couple of weeks now, had Edward not quite come to terms with that? But that didn't explain his relief at all!

It was stupid of me to be thinking on this so hard, but I just couldn't seem to stop. The truth of it was, that it simply made no sense! And what made it even more irritating was Edward's evasiveness towards the subject.

'_Aro called us in' my ass!_ My mind retorted quickly, _We were on the phone with him… I think we would have heard Aro's voice._

A loud howl of wind outside caught my attention, as I stumbled nimbly from the bed to shut the balcony doors which were busy slamming together. Each slam caused the delicate glass to shiver violently in it's frame and as I reached over to secure the doors together, a large gust of wind blew through, shattering the glass into a thousand tiny crystal pieces which slid across the floor.

_What the hell is going on?!_ My mind screamed inwardly.

The glass of course didn't cut me, but it was enough to make my bad day even worse, as I stood helplessly at the empty door frames staring out at the pacific ocean. The sky seemed to darken almost immediately, as a mass of black storm clouds crowded the sky ahead -unleashing their torment on the town below.

_Ah, Seldovia!_ I thought to myself, _Home of the drastic weather changes…_

I imagined all the poor people in town, barricading their doors and windows in a futile attempt to keep the weather out. Children running in screaming from the street, calling out to their parents as their parents ran aimlessly around the streets, screaming for their children.

_But no one will scream for me…_

I stepped out onto the cold, stone balcony and closed my eyes as the wind around me whipped past my face and hair. A cool breeze gusted under the large shirt I was wearing, revealing my bottom to the world.

I laughed loudly at the situation I was in. Standing here alone at the border of a messy room, contemplating why my current husband was relieved to leave me… and now I was openly flashing the world. And this was my life. Clumsy Bella Swan's life.

I pulled the shirt down once more and stepped back into the room. Small pieces of glass crunched beneath my marble stone feet as I pulverized the small stones into a crystal powder.

"Lets get me some underwear!" I said to myself out loud.

_You've really lost your mind now…_ My thoughts rebutted me. _Talking to yourself? Really Bella, have we sunk that low?_

Apparently so. I hoisted open the bedroom doors and stepped into the equally quiet hall way.

Where was everyone? Alice and Rose were still out, but what about Esme? And had Jasper taken Emmett some where different to have their little 'talk'?

"Esme?" I called out, expecting an immediate reply. When I received none, paranoia began to seep through.

I ran down the stairs quickly and looked around the large entrance hall. It was silent, except for the dull bang of the front door, swinging on its hinges. Spotting my small duffel bag at the foot of the stairs, I quickly removed a pair of shorts and slipped them on under Jasper's large shirt, fastening the buttons tightly.

My body involuntarily shivered as I searched through the large house, only to find my family had gone. My breathing picked up in pace and adrenaline seemed to course through my veins, even though my heart was cold and still. Past abandonment issues reared their ugly head as I became more and more desperate to find my family. As I ran around the house frantically, I felt as though someone was watching me. An un-seen gaze bore into the back of my head.

_Am I going crazy!_ I thought hysterically.

"STOP IT!" I screamed to the nothingness, "STOP WATCHING ME! PLEASE JASPER, WHERE ARE YOU!?"

This was impossible! They couldn't have just disappeared… could they? Doubt joined in to the thousands of emotions that were swirling around inside me.

I was about to run back up the stairs when I heard a car pull up out front. I ran eagerly to the entrance hall and ran full speed out the large front door, pulling it off it's hinges in the process. I watched as Rosalie's M3 pulled up and the driver's window rolled down, reveling Rose's immaculate face.

"Woah! Slow down Bella, what's up?" She asked, switching off the engine.

I watched as Alice's small form slipped from the passenger seat like a shadow; her emotions still crippling.

"I.. I can't.. I can't find any one!" I stuttered out, my stress levels climbing through the roof. "And it feels like someone is watching me!"

"What?!" Alice was suddenly incredibly concerned, and I was frightened she might blow away in the storm.

"I don't know where they went!?" I cried frustrated. "I was in my room and suddenly the storm started. My glass doors completely shattered, so I came out to find the others but they were gone! Where ever I went, it felt like someone was following me."

Rosalie stepped from her car hastily, her hair blowing wildly in the wind.

"They've probably just gone out," She called over the howling wind.

I nodded absent minded. I had a tendency to over react to the simplest of matters, but a part of me told me something wasn't right.

A large crack of thunder sounded overhead which cause me to jump and scream, apparently as a vampire I hadn't become any less jittery.

Alice let out a small giggle at my misfortune, but when I returned her smile, she seemed to retract it and ran inside.

"Come on," Rosalie called out, ushering me inside. "It's starting to rain…"

I ran inside quickly, while Rose picked up the broken door and bent the hinges in shape so that it sat right in it's frame.

Alice was stifling through her recent purchases, attempting to look busy.

I understood that. No need to hurt her more than I already had…

She pulled out a large photo frame from a bright, silver bag.

"Bella?" Alice called, beckoning me to sit next to her.

Her emotions were swinging from sadness, to joy, to anger, to sadness, to acceptance and the pattern continued. I sat down wearily at her feet as she pushed the large frame into my arms. It was a picture of Rose, Alice and myself in forks. It was graduation day, and as usual it was raining. We looked so happy -even Rose- in the photo and I was shocked as to just how differently I looked to my current state.

"It's just something I wanted to do.." Alice mumbled, wiggling her toes.

I looked up at her starry eyed, I wanted more than anything to hug her.

"I just wanted to show you that no matter what, you'll still be a part of this family… and even though I can't really be your sister at the moment, a part of me still loves you… I just need time."

"I can wait." I said, holding the frame closely to my heart.

"That's a good thing," She continued. "Cause it could be a while-"

"I can wait." I reaffirmed her, smiling softly.

She nodded her head and smiled shyly at me, moving to stand next to Rose.

"Just because you and Jasper are in love now, doesn't mean-"

Alice was cut of by a low, menacing laughter that echoed through the empty hall. The sound sent shivers through my spine as my eyes searched around wildly for the culprit.

"Moved on so quickly?" The low, dark voice called from the shadow of the coat closet. "My, my you **do** get around…"

I recognized immediately the dark, angry voice in the shadows.

It was the voice of someone I loved.

The voice of a run away.

The voice of Jacob Black…

**DUN DUN DUNNN!! **

**It's actually storming where I am and I am incredibly scared lol! **

**Review!**

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	22. Jacob

**Hello,**

**I'm very sorry about the cliffie lol and this is also an advanced apology for the no doubt more cliffies that are sure to come ha-ha!**

**Note about the previous chapter: I forgot about the whole 'wolf smell' thing haha, so I'll try to slip it in to this chapter.**

**Also there is very, VERY minimal swearing in this chapter. But I just thought you should know.**

**Finally, a big thanks to **_**nia-ox**_** for reading! She's the whole reason I got an account, so if you haven't read her stories -I strongly advise you to go now and read them… Seriously, I'll wait. Go read!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 22: Jacob

_The voice of Jacob Black…_

My body began to shake uncontrollably, as I fought back the sobs that were racking my very soul.

Jacob was here. Jacob had found me. My family was missing.

He stepped slowly from the shadows, the lightening framing his frightening features.

"Hello love…" He whispered menacingly, "Miss me?"

I was overcome with a smell so pungent, it scolded my throat and caused me to dry heave.

Jacob chuckled softly, pleased with his affect on me.

"You stay away from her dog!" Alice screeched, baring her sharp teeth and stepping in front of me.

"Now, now…" He continued, stepping closer to my shivering frame. "None of that… We all know that Bella would never send her lackeys on good ol' Best bud Jacob."

He spat the words 'best bud' like they were a viral disease, eating away at his heart.

Alice glanced at me briefly before exchanging a look with Rosalie. I nodded to her softly, pleading her to step down from her defense.

"What do you want?" I asked harshly, not daring to breath in his repugnant scent again.

"Let's not get hasty," He smiled, picking up the hall's cordless phone. "This all started with a phone call…"

Rosalie looked at me confused and paced around to stand behind Jacob. I understood at once what she was doing; We were surrounding him, inclosing him in a triangle.

"What are you talking about?" I asked coolly, keeping him distracted.

He glanced up and smiled a terrible smile. He was no longer mine or Sam's Jacob; he was a horribly disfigured combination of his wolf self and his wild heart.

"Sam said you'd run off…" He said, tossing the phone from hand to hand.

"He said the same thing about you," I quipped back, watching as Alice moved to his left.

Jacob laughed darkly, "That's true. I took off… I needed some time. When I came back Sam told me you'd run off with your leech! I tried to find you of course, but Sam said the rest of the family had already moved out."

I nodded along as he recounted the pointless details of his search for me.

"…But then Charlie received a phone call." He finished up, moving so that we were only a foot apart.

All the air gushed out of my body, as the pieces fell together. **I** had called Charlie just hours ago. It was **my** fault Jacob had found us.

"What's he talking about Bella?" Rose asked, clueing into the conversation.

I opened my mouth to reply, but I could only gasp small breaths out.

Jacob spun to face Rose.

"Bella's been a bad girl…" He said, tutting his tongue. "She made a call to daddy."

"Bella?" Alice whispered desperately.

"I didn't speak to him!" I cried out defensively, "I just wanted to hear his voice…"

"Of course you did.." Jacob replied, blowing me a kiss. "But I thought 'now who would ring Charlie and just breath into the phone?' The district code was traced to Seldovia, Alaska…" He breathed out, proud of his detective skills.

"And so you came…" I finished up.

He nodded, baring all his teeth.

"Why?" I whispered distraughtly.

"For you." He blew onto my face, reaching his hand to stroke my face.

"Touch her and die you filthy mutt."

The voice was so heavenly, I was sure I must have died.

Jasper had his hand on Jacobs shoulder and Emmett was standing close behind, fuming.

Esme, Alice and Rose had stepped closer, joining the circle. Each face was graved with fury, hands clenched in fists at their sides.

I let out a gust of breath I didn't know I was holding. My family was okay, they were safe.

"How dare you enter our home uninvited!" Jasper spat, throwing Jacob to the ground.

I expected Jacob to back off; retreat to a hiding. What I didn't expect was for him to laugh so loud and joylessly, that I felt the very foundations of my being quiver with fear.

"…And so the plot thickens," Jacob laughed out, jumping quickly from the ground.

The logical side of me told me that there was nothing to fear. It was six vampires against one loony werewolf, he didn't have a chance. But the less rational side of my brain was screaming in panic, terrified that Jacob would hurt somebody.

"…That's what threw me the most!" He spat, circling my family slowly. "You chose your beloved Edward over me and then you fuck his brother?"

Alice looked like she'd been slapped in the face as her emotional wounds ripped open; plain for all to see.

"You have no idea what's happened…" I hissed at him, moving to stand by Jasper's side.

"Oh don't I?" He laughed wildly, "So I didn't see you running around the house nearly naked, stinking of that leech's scent?"

I turned my head away sharply, as I was crippled by Alice's emotions.

He chuckled deeply, "That's what I thought…"

"Do you actually want something, or are you just going to keep speaking from the soul? How deeply did I hurt your dog heart?!" I spat, standing mere inches from him.

He threw the cordless phone he was holding right through the window, as his body began to shake and shiver with anger.

I stepped back quickly as his clothes ripped into shreds and his entire body morphed into his wolf form.

Even as a wolf, I could still see his sickeningly dark smile as he brought his face close to mine, blowing my hair with his breath.

"DOWN!" Came Emmett's booming voice as I dropped down to the floor, only to see him soar through the air and land on Jacob's back.

Jacob thrashed violently against the intrusion, as Alice and Jasper both ran at his legs; tearing his flesh with their teeth.

Jacob let out a loud, guttural howl and shook madly, as his eyes began to roll in his head.

I could only stand there and watch, as the man I once loved was held down to the ground and tethered with the hands of my family.

"Bella!" Esme screamed, beckoning me over. "Talk to him! Tell him to morph back… or this has to end the hard way."

_Death…_ My mind informed me.

As much as I detested Jacob at them moment, and as much as I wanted him to suffer -I knew I didn't want him to die. I moved over to look in his eyes.

His head -held down by Jasper- snapped uselessly at me, growling and howling in pain.

"Jacob morph back!" I demanded, staring him in the eyes. "Morph back, or they have to kill you."

As much as Jacob hated the idea of obeying a leech, I saw a flicker of fear cross his eyes and I knew he understood.

He closed his eyes as his body once again shook and quivered, until the real Jacob lay bleeding in front of us.

"Put this on!" Jasper shouted, throwing his shirt on Jacob's naked form, running upstairs to retrieve more clothes.

Jacob unwillingly obliged, slipping the large shirt over his broken body. His legs were bleeding badly and I was surprised by the amount of self control I had over myself to not drink his blood.

_Even as a newborn I think you'll have better taste…_ Something Edward had said to me long ago came to mind. I had been fretting about wanting to eat Jacob when I was changed, but obviously the scent of werewolf blood held no appeal.

Jacob rolled slowly to look at me. His eyes held no happiness anymore. There was only hate and anger, the Jacob I knew was long gone. I felt a pang of guilt sting my chest, as I realized that all of this was my fault.

I had led Jacob on when I knew there was no chance of us being together. I had kissed him more than once, giving him such false hope. How could he not react like this?

"I'm sorry…" I whispered out remorsefully.

Emmett snapped his head up to stare at me.

"You're apologizing to him?" He asked incredulously.

I nodded softly, not breaking eye contact with Jacob.

"I'm sorry you have no more joy in your life and I'm sorry that it's partially my fault… but Jacob, you **need** to move on! You can't keep living like this, they'll be other girls…"

"But not other Bella's…." He muttered hopelessly, as his eyes brimmed with tears.

"No.." I answered honestly, "There won't be other Bella's."

Jacob sat up slowly, as the entire family watched him suspiciously.

He wiped the blood from his legs and I wasn't surprised to see the wounds had already healed over.

_Werewolves heal fast…_ He had said all that time ago.

Jasper returned downstairs and threw a pair of trousers at Jacob.

Jacob's nose scrunched involuntary at the strong scent I was sure was on the clothes, but he slipped them on all the same.

He moved forward as if to hug me, but I stepped back quickly.

"If you ever come anywhere near us again… we **will** have to kill you," I whispered icily.

He just stared at me as if memorizing my face, then he nodded shortly and turned to face the rest of my family.

"This was fun," He said smiling. "We should do it again some time." And just like that, the small glimmer of the real Jacob disappeared to be replaced by his dark and twisted demeanor.

He turned to face me, smiling frighteningly.

"See you soon Bells…" He whispered, running hastily from the house and slipping into the woods like a shadow.

As he disappeared from sight, I stood at the edge of the front door and whispered my reply,

"…I hope I never do."

**Okay it is quarter past three and my god I have an assignment due tomorrow!**

**You're lucky I posted lol!**

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	23. Memories

**UGH!**

**I'm back at school… Holidays went much too quickly! That's why I haven't updated in a couple of days, so sorry to those of you surprised.**

**But onto what you actually came to read, I know this is a short chapter but I'll update tomorrow. I just have a lot of school work at the moment.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 23: Memories

I stood at the doorway long after Jacob had disappeared. Watching… Waiting for some sign of movement.

"_See you soon…"_ He had whispered, full of promise and threat.

Night had set over once again… Not that night marked anything particular in my new life. As a human, night had marked the end of another day, promising new things for the morning. Now it was merely a change in light.

A crack of lightening overhead illuminated the stillness of the pacific ocean, as a gust of strong wind blew a pale of rain in.

"…Bella?"

A voice behind me whispered softly, startling the silence.

I couldn't form a sentence. Not now. Not after…

"_Miss me? …Why'd you come back?…."_

"… _For you."_

Why? And how? How had the friend I loved so dearly, become something so twisted and horrible?

"Bella?"

The voice was becoming more impatient. But it was still the most beautiful voice I'd ever heard.

"Bella please, turn around…"

When I didn't, the cause of the voice moved to stand in front of me.

Jasper stood there in all his glory. He still had no shirt on and his messy hair was blowing all over his face. The family had long retreated to their separate sections of the house.

His eyebrows were pulled together in a state of frustration.

"Bella… I'm sorry. I'm so very sorry that you had to deal with that…"

I looked up to meet his piercing glance.

_Jacob's eyes were like coal. Etched with anger and denial._

"Was it me?" I asked wearily.

"Was what you?" He replied, lifting my chin with his fingers.

"The fact that he was like that… that he was so full of anger-"

I was cut short by Jasper's lips on mine. He crushed his body to mine, squeezing my shoulders and holding me closer to him.

He pulled back harshly, pushing his forehead against mine.

"Don't you dare think that for a minute!" He cursed out loudly. "When I think about what could have happened… If I hadn't… If I hadn't…"

His words became less coherent as his body softly sobbed against mine.

"You've meant more to me… than anything… ever… If I'd lost you to **him**-"

"Shhhh," I chided softly. "No one will take me from you. Not Jacob, or Alice… not even Edward."

He nodded rapidly, squeezing his eyes shut as if to hold back the memories.

"Jasper?"

We turned around to the voice of Alice. She was sitting at the edge of the stairs, looking slightly frazzled and she was clearly upset by the way Jasper and I were standing.

"Jasper… Emmett would like to speak to you. It's about the Wolves.. You know, just in case they come back…"

She was trying to word herself carefully, as to not upset me.

Jasper nodded softly, kissing me softly on the lips and exiting the room.

Alice smiled slightly, as if trying to comfort me. Her emotions betrayed her.

She was incredibly upset.

"Are you okay Bella?" She asked tentatively.

I nodded glumly, unable to trust my voice.

"Would you like to do something… Hunting? A game? Twister maybe!" She said optimistically.

Oh Twister. Times had been so much simpler then. I was still Edward's and Jasper was still Alice's. It seemed like a life time ago, even though in reality it had only been a couple of weeks.

"No thank you Alice," I whispered out hoarsely. "But I do appreciate the suggestion…"

She smiled a small smile.

"Do you want to take a trip?"

I looked up at her confused.

"A trip?"

Her smile grew larger and her eye sparkled with a little of the old Alice.

"I think it's about time we visited them…"

"Who?" I asked, growing impatient.

She laughed a soft, girlish laugh then stared at me.

"The Denali Clan."

**Too much work.**

**I hate school! Not really… I'm just not used to it loL!**

**Again, I know this chapter was short**

**I really sorry, I'll update tomorrow.**

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	24. Help Me

**Hello!**

**Okay, as promised.**

**Just so it's clear **_**Italics**_** are when she's remembering or thinking.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 24: Help Me

"_The Denali Clan…"_

I visibly cringed at the thought of having to visit the people who first chose to live the 'vegetarian' life.

I knew it was foolish, but a part of me still feared them. Even now, as a sturdy, strong newborn.

There were two reasons for this.

One, because they had never come to our aid when the newborns attacked. What kind of friends could they be to us if they hadn't even aided us in a battle which meant life or death?

And two, because a certain vampire that resided there held certain feelings for the man I was legally married to. A woman built like a succubi -both physically and mentally. A woman with strawberry blond hair.

Tanya.

The thought made me shiver with disgust.

"Or maybe not…" Alice said with confusion, noticing my hesitation to answer.

I immediately felt the disappointment from her and felt terrible for not taking the chance to mend our friendship.

"No I'd love to Alice!" I answered, a bit too quickly.

"Really?" She replied sarcastically, stepping closer to me so that she was looking up into my eyes. "Cause I could have sworn the reaction you had wasn't that of a happy, excited person…"

She smiled cheesily, winking at me slowly. I laughed at her boisterous nature and carefully put an arm around her shoulder.

She didn't seem to detest the gesture, so I took that as a good sign and poked her in the ribs laughing.

"How do you know that wasn't just my reaction to you?" I asked cheekily, spinning to face her.

Alice slapped a hand over her mouth in mock horror and pretended to stifle back a sob.

"Isabella Marie Swan Cullen!" She cried, poking me harder in the chest, "How dare you imply that my nature caused you to cringe and shiver in disgust! I bring happiness where ever I go… and might I add great fashion sense to all who surround me!"

I laughed at her again.

"Yes you do," I replied honestly, looking at her seriously for a moment. "And before that whole Jacob thing happened-"

I was cut short by a flash of memory, pulling at my mind's strings.

"_Bella's been a bad girl…" _Eyes so full of anger_ "You choose your beloved Edward…. Then you fuck his brother?!"_

I slumped to the floor from the mere impact of the memory.

_God you're weak!_ I mentally scolded myself.

"Bella!" Alice cried, shaking my shoulders and forcing me to look at her.

I laughed awkwardly, trying to brush it off. I didn't want her knowing that I was scared of Jacob. That I was being plagued by memories of a face; twisted by anger, mutilated by fury.

"Sorry…" I laughed out weakly, "Must have slipped…"

Alice opened her mouth to speak, but someone else beat her.

"You tend to use that excuse a lot."

I turned around to find Jasper leaning against the entrance hall archway, looking concerned.

_Dammit!_ My mind cursed, _Alice had never heard the excuse before!_

"Bella, Bella, Bella…" Jasper murmured, moving to kneel down next to me, "What are we going to do with you?"

"It's nothing really…" I muttered out quickly, "it's jus-"

"It's not nothing!" Alice rebuked, kneeling to my other side. "And you didn't slip, what's wrong?"

I looked into Alice's eyes then stole a glance at Jasper, who was staring intently back.

I sighed loudly, giving in.

"Okay fine… I'll tell!" I said sharply, drawing lines on the cold tile and avoiding eye contact. "But you have to promise not to freak out and over react like you always do!"

"I think 'always' is perhaps too strong a word-" Jasper started to argue.

"Uh, uh no!" I replied, wagging my finger at him. "Just promise."

He reluctantly nodded and Alice did the same.

"It's just Jacob.." I said very sullenly.

"What about Jacob!?" Alice asked quickly, stress levels climbing through the roof.

"Alice calm!" I requested, rubbing her shoulders.

When her unnecessary breathing returned, I continued.

"I can't seem to stop thinking about him…"

"_This was fun…"_ A deep, joyless laugh_ "We should do it again some time!"_

I slapped a hand to my forehead, as if trying to push back the memories.

Both Jasper and Alice looked at each other then at me, confused.

I shrugged, flopping my hands around in the air.

"Every time I even think about him, it's like… like" I struggled for the right word. "It's as if all the happy memories I had of him are gone, to be replaced by these awful, angry ones that just keep flying at me from all sides! His face is so angry and his words… I can't protect myself from him anymore!"

"Of course you can!" Alice said soothingly, "You're a vampire, you don't need any protection at all…"

"That's not what I mean…" I replied, fumbling with my short's pockets as the memories flew in rapidly.

"_Now, now…"_ Smiles without warmth _"Bella would never send her lackeys on good ol' Best bud Jacob."_

I pounded my fists against my head, forcing back the memories.

Jasper picked my chin up forcing me to look at him.

"What do you mean?" He asked, blowing fresh breath over my face and immediately making me sit up straight.

I let out the gust of breath I had unconsciously been holding.

"I don't mean physically protect myself from Jacob… I mean mentally. He's all in here now," I said, pointing at my head. "Before, I could imagine he was happy, that he was off somewhere being wolfy and having fun, now it's… uh!"

I sighed again and closed my eyes, thumping my head against the back of the stairs.

"Now I know how it really is!" I cried out, running my fingers through my hair. "I know how he's actually feeling; angry and upset… and every time I think about it.."

"_See you soon Bells…"_

I groaned loudly forcing my head between my knees.

"He won't go away… help me make him go!" I said pleadingly.

Jasper pulled my head against his chest, kissing my forehead and for once I did not feel a pang of jealousy or anger from Alice, only compassion and love.

This revelation made me sob a thank you to Alice, as she shushed me softly, running her hand through my messy hair.

At some point Esme, Rose and Emmett entered the room, sitting down beside me and offering their own compassion and help as Alice recounted the details of what I had just told.

I sat in Jasper's lap and watched my family awe and gasp as Alice spoke.

What had I done to deserve a family this caring? Even now… after everything that had happened, after all the misery and the heart ache I had cause them -they still cared for me.

I sob escaped my lips and the entire family spun to see what had upset me.

"Why are you smiling?" Emmett asked, when he realised it was a sob of happiness.

I shook my head slowly against Jasper's shirt, muttering several incoherent things.

"What is it?" Rose asked, smiling slightly at my inability to speak.

I looked into each of their eyes and saw only love. The love I had always wanted in a family.

"Thank you…" I whispered softly, closing my eyes. "Thank you for staying with me… Even after-"

"Oh Shush!" Alice cut me off, grabbing me in a strong hug.

The rest of the family was still for a second, before they all scrambled over quickly to join the family hug, each trying to grab a bit of me to hold.

I realised as I sat there, cradled by my family, that many people would have called me corny for loving such a moment. But here, right now in my moment of joy I had never felt more love and kindness in my life, and I buried myself further into the hug wanting to be engrossed in the feeling.

As my family held me closer, my mind focused on every feeling, every smell, touch and sound, committing this moment to memory. And as I swam in the feeling of joy, the angry voice of Jacob Black began to fade away…

**Tada,**

**I realise this chapter was a little sad, but I needed one more sad one just to sum up some of her Jacob stuff lol.**

**But never fear, next chapter we're having some fun with Denali!**

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	25. Preparation

**Hello!**

**This chapter is kind of fluffy, but I needed it to put in before the next chapter.**

**So anyway, thanks for all your reviews as well as the anon ones!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 25: Preparation

We lay together on the cool, marble floor for an incomprehensible amount of time. At some point the rain ceased and a still, autumn night set in -darkening the corners of this beautiful house.

I had somehow manoeuvred my head beneath Jasper's chin and I lay squished between his and Alice's bodies. But I couldn't have been happier.

Emmett was curled in a ball near Esme's lap, as Rose ran her fingers down his back; making him shiver every now and then.

"God, these past few days have been depressing…" Emmett murmured, for which he received a playful slap from Rosalie.

"No, he's right…" I replied, silencing Rose's disapproving words, "We have lost a lot of our family zest."

"What happened to all the fun we use to have?" Alice chirped in, lifting her head from the ground and stretching as if she'd been sleeping.

I felt a wave of guilt from Jasper, so I lifted my head and gave him a chaste kiss on the lips.

"We're making baby steps," I whispered, though I was sure the family would have heard.

"We need to find the fun again!" Emmett said excitedly, imagining hundreds of possibilities to renew the zest. "We're in a new town, with new places -We can have heaps of fun!"

"Yeah, at least until Edward comes home…" I muttered thoughtlessly.

The entire family seemed to suck in a gasp of air and the atmosphere became very dense.

There was no point in trying to sugar coat it, when Edward returned I would break his heart.

An unsettling silence fell upon us as I fidgeted uncomfortably, wishing I'd never brought it up.

"That's what I'm talking about!" Emmett sighed exasperated.

"Bella! You have to stop doing that. We get it, we do. And after Jasper and I had our little 'talk,'" He continued, winking at Jasper, "I really can understand how it happened. Edward's just going to have to deal." He finished up, flinging his hands in the air.

I smirked at Emmett's indifferent attitude towards almost everything. He had a way of making the biggest problems seem like the easiest ones to fix. But this wasn't. However, as much as the every closing in problem was to me, I didn't want to upset everyone again; so I settled for nodding, agreeing with Emmett.

Esme sat up, leaning against the stairs.

"Well how about a trip?" She asked, fiddling with the buttons on her shirt.

Alice seemed to spring up immediately, standing at the front of us.

"Yes! That's perfect! Bella and I were going to visit the Denali clan, but now we can all go," She paused to give me a excited glance, then continued. "I'm sure Tanya and the others would love to see us, Oh and Bella we absolutely **have** to get you all dolled up! Tanya is nothing in comparison to you!"

I didn't mean to, but I let out an audible groan.

Alice turned to look at me, hurt.

"No Alice, I'm sorry!" I began profusely apologising, "I groaned because I thought I had passed 'dress-up-Bella' games!"

She smiled again, realising my disdain was for the makeover, not her company.

"Ooooooh!" Emmett said excitedly, "I'd love to see Irina again!"

I heard a dull clap, followed by Emmet's cursing.

"OW! Rosie! I just meant because… you know.. She was so friendly and-"

"Oh 'friendly' was she?" Rose asked accusingly, "You were practically putty in her skanky hand!"

Emmett continued to plead back defensively, while I questioned Jasper as to the identity of this 'Irina.'

"Tanya's younger 'sister,'" He said laughing at a past memory. "She was all over Emmett, complimenting and touching him. Rose hated it. Emmett of course… well he loved it because he's a Emmett!"

Jasper laughed again and Rose gave him a hash scowl,

"You're not helping!" She hissed, pinning Emmett below her and tickling and poking him in the ribs.

Esme snorted a small laugh and jumped out gracefully, heading towards the front door.

"Well, if we we're going to impress them -we might as well do it thoroughly!" She said, pointing towards the unpacked cars and truck. "Come on, we'll drag all the boxes and luggage in, then we'll get dressed."

We all stared at her silently, lacking the enthusiasm to unpack a household worth of items.

Esme sighed deeply and decided to compromise.

"Fine, who ever unpacks the most gets shotgun for the front seat when we ride up in style to Denali."

That was enough reason for us. We clambered awkwardly and hastily from our tangled embrace and ran full speed to the cars, chucking boxes in several piles -claiming them as our own.

In the time space of about five minutes, there were boxes piled in high towers, cluttering the large entrance hall. We each quickly counted the boxes we'd accumulated and shouted our numbers quickly, to see who had won.

"Thirty-seven!" Alice shouted,

Followed by Emmett, "Forty two! Sucker!" He said laughing.

"Ugh!" Rosalie groaned, "I only got thirty…"

I laughed, dancing a happy dance around my siblings, "I got fifty!"

Emmett visibly fumed, kicking his foot against the unstable box tower and sending them flying across the room.

"Yes!" I cried, pleased with my achievement.

"Oh no, no, no…" Jasper said smiling, "I believe I have a massive pile of…."

We waited in anticipation, as Jasper prolonged the suspense for as long as he could.

"Fifty freakin' six!" He announced proudly, strutting around the room.

I sighed loudly, stepping closer to him and running my finger over his chest.

"Jasper?" I pleaded lovingly, "Could I please have the front seat?"

Alice politely excused herself, not quite use to seeing Jasper in the arms of another woman.

"Oh no!" He said sternly, "You're not going to seduce this out of me!"

I laughed softly then pushed my body firmly against him, using physical contact in all the right places.

He pushed a gust of air across my face, groaning softly.

"Please?" I asked sweetly.

"I…Well…" He stuttered out incoherently.

"Okay come on!" Rosalie interrupted, "Let's go, before you give him a heart attack!"

I reluctantly let go of Jasper and let Rose drag me up the stairs, towards the third level. At first I thought we were going towards my room, but she turned to the left down a red passage way and entered a large cream door.

The room itself was beautiful, apart from the hundreds of items of clothing being tossed from side to side as a frantic Alice searched through hundreds of boxes.

"Uh Alice?" I asked cautiously, interrupting her frantic search.

After ignoring Rose and I's presence, she hopped into one of the boxes, eventually popping out with three outfits in hand.

"Yes!" Alice said with a mischievous smile…

I put on my game face and smiled reassuringly,

"Make me beautiful!"

**Kind of random Ending,**

**I may not be able to update tomorrow.**

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	26. Beauty

**There's a poll on my profile regarding Edward, be sure to vote!**

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**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 26: Beauty

"_Make me Beautiful!"_

Alice squealed a high pitched cry of joy and began sifting through a large bag of cosmetic products while Rose guided me to the 'preparation chair.'

At closer inspection of the chair, I noticed it had ropes around the arms rests and shackles near the feet.

"Alice!" I said laughing at the contraption, "I think the prisoner chair is a little excessive!"

She poked her head out of the bag briefly to inspect what I was talking about.

She waved her hand dismissively at the chair.

"That was just for when you were human… It's not like it could hold you now, is it!?" She replied, as if it was almost normal for a human to be strapped down to a chair and have makeovers forced upon them.

I laughed at her cavalier attitude and sat down in the plush seat, inspecting the tort ropes and chains.

"And when exactly where you planning to use this on me?" I asked, while Rose tied my hair back in a loose bun.

"Oh I don't know…" She said distracted, "I saw a vision of you refusing to let me do your wedding makeup…"

I snorted a very un-ladylike laugh and slapped my hand over my mouth, embarrassed.

Rosalie stifled her laugh and Alice continued to mutter on about how once Edward found the chair, he threatened to turn her Porsche into a tin can.

"Aha!" Alice cried out, holding up a small makeup dispenser.

"Should I be frightened?" I asked cautiously.

It was true, Alice could not forcibly keep me here like when I was a human. But I didn't want to risk upsetting Alice when we'd just began to mend our friendship.

Alice laughed a small, low chuckle then turned to face me, smiling innocently -makeup in hand.

She stepped towards me and I slinked back into the chair, as if that would protect me!

"Hold her Rose!" Alice cried, leaping onto my lap and powdering my face in a light coat of dust.

She worked quickly, covering every bit of skin, then sighed melodramatically -holding my face in her hands.

"Stop scrunching your face like there's a bad smell!" She said irritably, "I don't want leave lines."

I reluctantly obliged, letting my face relax as much as I could.

"Okay!" She sighed exasperated, "The base is done, you can relax your face."

I opened my eyes slightly and she pushed the makeup brush on my nose, laughing.

"How much makeup do I need?" I asked curiously, "I mean I **am** a vampire now, it can't possibly be as much as when I was human!"

"No, no, no…" Alice replied, searching through her kit. "We're just going to put a bit of eye makeup on and maybe a bit of lippy then we're done!"

I blew out my breath, glad for the minimum makeup.

"…Of course we still have to do your hair," Alice finished up coyly, I could hear the smile playing on her lips.

"Oh of course.." I said sarcastically, "Can't possibly leave without the hair!"

Rosalie laughed light heartedly and began brushing through my tangled locks.

"You'll get use to it…" She said comfortingly, "It only took me about… well ten years!"

I groaned and slumped my head in my hands.

"Uh, uh, uh!" Alice said lifting my head and wagging her finger disapprovingly, "Don't take it out on the makeup!"

I laughed and held my head very still while she continued.

I closed my eyes as Alice brushed different assortments of colors over my eyelids, pulling my eyelashes longer and applying god knows how much mascara.

Rosalie was obviously curling or straightening my hair, because I could feel the hot iron pulling through my hair, turning every now and then.

"Eyes open," Alice demanded, as she inspected her job.

She smiled and clapped her hands together giddily.

Rose turned to face me briefly and smiled, before returning to the task of my hair.

"Can I see?" I asked gingerly, already knowing the answer.

"Now Bella, you know me better than that," Alice said smiling, "you can see when everything's done… that includes attire!"

I scoffed in impatience and slumped back into the chair, folding my hands against my chest.

A few more minutes of tugging and pulling at my hair, Rosalie finally set the hair iron down and spun around to face me.

Both her and Alice gasped in synchronization, holding their hands together and jumping on the spot.

Their combined excitement was making me incredibly excited, as I longed to find a mirror.

"Okay, outfit time!" Alice said, rushing over to the six piles she'd made on the bed, one pile per family member.

I laughed at Alice's organization skills and stepped over to the bed, inspecting each one.

The first I assumed was Emmett's, as it was the largest of the two male outfits. There was a pair of dark blue straight-leg jeans with a black button up shirt and a pair of unnaturally shiny shoes.

"Isn't this all a bit formal?" I asked, moving on to inspect Jasper's outfit.

"Trust me," Rose said huffing, "these girls dress anything but casual…"

I nodded slowly, looking down at Jaspers clothes. There were a pair of tight fitting black jeans and a white button up, with a thin black tie draped around the collar, there were a pair of Chucks at the base of the bed, which I assumed were his too. I got euphoric just thinking about how Jasper would look in this so I moved onto the female outfits.

Rosalie was busy putting her's on -and of course she looked stunning. It was a knee length red dress, which had a neckline cut down to her navel and a beautiful pair of black heels.

Alice was wearing a short green dress, which came up to mid thigh but had quite a high neckline.

"You like?" She asked spinning and revealing the dress was in fact backless.

"You look gorgeous, both of you do." I said smiling at Rose.

"Wait till you see yourself hun," She replied, holding up a short cream colored dress.

I gasped at how beautiful it was. It had thin spaghetti straps and a seemed to flow down elegantly till about knee length.

"Ohhh! Gimme, gimme!" I said excitedly, holding my hands out like a five year old.

"And the shoes?" Alice said cheekily, holding up a pair of gold, sparkly heels.

The shoes were beautiful, but I laughed because the sparkles reminded me of Dorothy's shoes in The Wizard of Oz.

"Knock, knock," Esme said, stepping into the room. "Oh girls!" She said gasping, "You look beautiful!"

Alice gave a small curtsey and handed Esme a long, elegant blue dress.

"Oooooh!" Esme said, inspecting the dress, "Armani…"

I laughed at our girlish moment and stripped down quickly to my underwear, ready to get dressed.

"Woah Bella!" I heard Emmett boom excitedly, "You look smoking!"

Rose cleared her throat loudly and only then did Emmett turn to face her and lose all his breath.

"Oh… Rosie… you.. Uh… WOW!" He stuttered out difficulty.

"I'll take that as a compliment," She said happily, and skipped over to give him a kiss. "Now, here are your's and Jasper's outfits, go get dressed."

He nodded slowly, drinking in her form -then fumbled from the room quickly, shutting the door behind him.

I slipped the silky fabric of my dress over my body and slipped the sparkly gold heels on.

"Okay," I said fully dressed, "Can I please see myself now?"

My sisters and mother turned to face me quickly and sighed in content.

"You look beautiful," Esme said sweetly, as Alice guided me over to the walk in.

"Close your eyes.." She said laughing and opening the door.

I did as she said and stepped into the small room, cautious not to bump into anything.

"Okay stop," She said squeezing my hand. "Okay….. Open your eyes!"

I opened one eye slowly and smiled largely at the girl in the mirror.

"Thank you Alice!" I said happily and hugging her tightly.

My hair had been waved slightly and it tossed down my back elegantly, framing my face.

I only had a light powder of makeup on, but I also had gold shimmer on my eyelids, matching my shoes. And mascara which made my eyelashes look about ten times their real length.

Esme stepped into the room, fiddling with her chandelier earrings and Rose followed with a camera.

"First picture of the new house?" She said, holding up the large, professional camera.

Alice clapped her hands together excitedly as she arranged us all into certain positions.

Rosalie set the camera on timer and skipped quickly to join us, stepping between Esme and Alice.

"Saaayyy 'We're some hot vampires!'" Alice said in all seriousness, making the rest of us laugh.

The camera flashed and Alice bounded over to inspect the photo.

"Ooooh!" She said, pleased with the result. "We look hot!"

Esme and I laughed while Rose and Alice zoomed in and cropped the photo making it perfect.

After about ten minutes of arguing on which color tone to set the photo in, they finally agreed that it looked good in the tone it had originally been set in.

I laughed at the irony of the situation and moved out of the walk-in to gather my purse.

The others followed, walking to separate sections of the room to gather there things.

"Color tone okay now?" I teased, winking at Alice.

She huffed and scowled, grabbing my hand and walking me to the stairs.

"So we can go now?" I asked excitedly.

"Oh yes," Rose replied smiling.

"Get ready to be fed to the lions…"

**Haha, it's taking a while to get to Denali lol! **

**Next chapter we meet the clan and we get Jasper's reaction to Bella!**

**Woo!**

**Review!**

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	27. Denali

**Okay, FINALLY we meet the Denali Clan! Lol**

**This is a long chapter, to make up for the shortness of the previous ones. Also, I don't know how many seats are in Emmett's Jeep, but for this chapter I just made it up.**

**This chapter is dedicated to **_**gemin**_** and **_**xdancefreakx**_** for some great story ideas, however it all depends on how the poll results go, so don't forget to vote!**

**I don't know about AlicexEdward… Doesn't it seem a bit incest? They're so brother/sisterly! I've put some Alice relationship stuff in this chapter, if you hate it with a fiery passion just tell me at the end!**

**Enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

Chapter 27: Denali

I was suddenly very nervous about coming face to face with Tanya and the others.

My mind was once again screaming, _Lions!? Rosalie had referred to them as lions!_

Is that what they were like? Would they maul me alive?

I walked down the stairs mechanically, lost in my own fear and doubt. I could feel the impatience radiating from the lobby, Jasper and Emmett were obviously getting intolerant.

"Men…" I muttered to myself chuckling, "Never can wait.."

Alice -who had been bounding down the stairs lightly, humming an unfamiliar tune- abruptly stopped.

"Alice?" I asked curiously, stepping in front of her and shaking her slightly.

Her eyes glazed over as she was swept into a vision of the future. After a minute or two she shook her head and shuddered slightly.

"Could have done without seeing that…" She mumbled, emotions noticeably down.

"What was it?" Rose asked concerned, "Was it about Denali? Or the Volturi? Was it Carlisle!? Oh my god it was Carlisle, wasn't it!?"

"Calm down!" Alice said laughing and slapping her hand over Rose's mouth to silence her. "Just glimpsed a little… uh, 'moment' between Bella and Jasper…"

I was suddenly drowning in my own embarrassment and shame.

"Sorry.." I whispered out horrified, "I could put up the barrier if.. If it's easier…"

She smiled comfortingly, "It's fine really… just caught me of guard."

I returned her smile half heartedly, so she squeezed my hand softly and pulled me gently down the stairs.

"Ready to wow our men?" Alice asked excitedly, turning to face all of us.

Rosalie nodded enthusiastically, as I was overcome with nervousness.

_Stop being silly,_ My mind chided _He's seen you naked, I doubt a 'dressy Bella' is anything to stress about._

"Introducing…." Alice called from the top of the stairs in a very carnival-style voice, "Esme Anne Platt Cullen!"

Esme walked down the stairs, strutting to each side and tipping her head back in a very melodramatic style. Never having seen Esme behave in such a manner before, I burst out laughing, clutching at my sides.

My laugh must have alerted Jasper of my presence, because I felt a prick of excitement coursing through my veins, running over my skin.

"I don't think this is entirely fair!" I heard Emmett complain, "Me and Jazz didn't get to do a catwalk…"

Alice poked her head around the corner quickly.

"Okay first of all, Sssshhh!!" She said smiling, "You can do a strip tease later if that makes you feel better…"

I felt a huge burst of excitement from downstairs and I had to all but bite my tongue to stop from laughing.

"Now if you'll let me carry on," Alice continued, "We're getting to the part of the show you're _interested_ in…" She said, voice thick with innuendo. "Introducing the gorgeous, elegant Rosalie Hale Cullen!"

Rosalie slipped from the shadows and danced down the stairs, moving like a gentle breeze. I heard Emmett gulp loudly as Rosalie danced down the handle bar, sliding over marble.

"Woo, Woo, Woooooo!!" Emmett wolf whistled, stamping his foot on the ground and panting.

"And now.." Alice called loudly, "the ever beautiful, ever fashionable, queen pixie of the land…. Alice Brandon Cullen!"

Alice stepped out shyly, faking embarrassment over the kind words she'd used to describe herself.

"Oh thank you, thank you!" She said happily, waving in a regal manner at the small crowd.

"And last, but not least… Isabella Marie Swan Cullen!"

I didn't want to come out now. I couldn't be silly or sexy like the others, I could be clumsy… but that wasn't really appealing.

"I said.. ISABELLA MARIE SWAN CULLEN!" Alice repeated in a louder voice, as if there was any way I **couldn't** have heard the first one!

I poked my head around the corner cautiously.

_Holy crap, look at Jasper!_ My mind squealed excitedly.

All the air in my body left me in a gush as I struggled to stand up right -I had never been more attracted to someone in my entire life. Jasper's hair was still damp from showering and it hung delicately in his eyes, rolling small water drops down his alabaster skin. His tie hung loosely around his neck, framing his perfect chest which was visible due to his shirt being open. But as my eyes continued south…

I sucked in a large amount of air quickly, gripping the marble handle bar firmly. His hip bones stuck out delectably, begging me to trace the defined bone. His jeans hung loosely around his hips but were snug in all the right places. I was sure I must have been imparting a lot of lust on the family, but right now I couldn't care less.

Jasper caught my eye and winked, darting his tongue out quickly to lick his lips.

"Please come out…" He whispered seductively, taking a step closer to the base of the stairs.

"Yeah come on Bella!" Emmett boomed, "We want to see you shake your stuff!"

I laughed softly and stepped out from behind the large pillar. Jasper stiffened immediately. He blew me a wave of hard lust and my foot slipped, causing me to skip 3 steps and land on the bottom one some-what gracefully.

I felt a tinge of embarrassment from Jasper and I looked down to find him crossing his legs uncomfortably in an attempt to hide his suddenly too-tight pants.

I returned his wink and took his hand smiling.

"You.. You look beautiful," He stuttered out, smiling shyly.

I smiled back at him and dragged him towards the front door.

"What car are we taking?" I asked curiously, suddenly more confident at meeting Tanya and the others.

"Mine!" Emmett boomed proudly, "It's pretty hard to get to their place, on a count of it's on a mountain!' He laughed wildly, slapping his knee.

Rose rolled her eyes and took his hand leading him to the garage, while Esme and Alice walked ahead discussing the issues we might have regarding Laurent.

I moved to walk behind them, but Jasper tugged my hand and mouthed 'stay' to which I readily obeyed.

"You really do look beautiful.." He said smiling softly.

"And you look to good to be true," I replied, kissing him softly on the lips.

As I moved to pull away, Jasper snaked his arms around my waist and pulled me hard against him, deepening the kiss. I could feel every inch of him, including just how tight his pants really were and my body reacted by bucking my hips. He groaned into my mouth and I knew that I had to pull away now or never stop.

I reluctantly separated our bodies and shook my head softly.

"Not now… we've got to go…" I whispered, tugging his hand towards the garage.

"Are you sure?" He asked coyly, tracing his hands over my collar bone and down my sides.

"Yes," I said laughing and 'accidentally' brushing my hands over his crutch to which he groaned and looked at me smiling.

"No one is dangerous like you Isabella Cullen," He said laughing and throwing me over his shoulder.

He ran with me to the Jeep and dumped me unceremoniously in the back seat before jumping in the front seat next to Esme.

"You're driving Esme!?" I asked flabbergasted.

The thought of someone as graceful and elegant as Esme driving a monstrous car seemed very out of place.

"I like to drive," She said winking and strapping on a seat belt, "Lets Driveee!!"

I turned around to find Emmett and Rosalie seated in the small fold down chairs near the boot, which faced at the back window. I remembered in seats like that when I was younger and waving out the window to the cars behind us. Of course I was five then so I fit quite well, however Emmett was over six feet tall and seemed to be a little cramped.

I laughed softly and turned back around to a curious Alice.

"What?" I asked softly, suddenly worried.

She brought a small hand up to my face and traced the lines around my eyes.

"You're eyes are getting darker… when was the last time you hunted?" She asked concerned.

Jasper spun around quickly in the seat and turned to face me wearing a mask of seriousness.

"I don't know…" I replied evasively, "Three, four days maybe?"

Alice seemed to be calculating something in her head as her eye brows furrowed together in concentration.

"Your control is waning, we should hunt after Denali…" She said in a serious tone.

I was very worried now. What if I couldn't make it? I felt okay now, but what I we actually came across a human?

"Shouldn't we stop now!?" I asked hysterically.

"And ruin all my hard work!" Alice said laughing and gesturing to my appearance.

I smiled back grateful for the change in tone and turned back to face the front.

_You can make it, you can make it…_ I repeated the mantra in my head over and over, pushing away the thirst.

I decided on another strategy -distraction.

"So who exactly makes up the Denali Clan?" I asked curiously.

"Well… There's Tanya," Alice begun; counting the family on her fingers. "Who always had a thing for Edward, then there's Irina, who was…well 'fond' of Laurent, Carmen and Eleazar, who are mates and Katrina or Kate as she prefers to be called."

I nodded slowly, committing each name to memory. "So it's only the five of them then?"

"Well as far as we know," Jasper said, still facing out the window. "They may have grown since we last saw them.."

"Okay…" I suddenly remembered something I had been meaning to talk about earlier. "Uh.. Guys?" I asked cautiously, "Could we maybe **not** tell them about Jasper and I? It's just, I'd hate for them to know before I've even talked to Edward."

Alice noticeably stiffened beside me, but nodded all the same, humming softly.

The car settled into a comfortable silence as the Jeep bounced over the rugged terrain and jolted with each passing tree stump. I began to notice we were driving into cooler weather, not that it affected me in the slightest, but the trees outside became dewier and small patches of snow could be seen, lining tree branches and flower heads.

After roughly an hour of back track driving we were immersed in thick snow which covered all in sight. I pressed my hands against the cool glass and watched as the bits of snow flew in all directions as the Jeep tore through. I realized that the car was driving on somewhat of an angle and that we were in fact driving up a mountain!

"This is where they live?" I asked fascinated.

A conversation Jasper and I had had once came to mind,

"_Where in Denali do they live?" I asked, suddenly curious about this other 'vegetarian' family._

"_A little way from Seldovia, they're a few miles north/west in a small village called Kantishna, they're house is in the mountains. Incredibly difficult for human's to find or stumble upon." _

Would we struggle to find the house? My question was soon answered as I spotted a wide glass structure not far away.

My mouth fell open in astonishment, "That's a house!?"

Esme laughed softly, "Yes, that's their house… Human's can't really see it in the snow, it sort of camouflages."

I nodded, mouth agape and watched as a large screen rolled back, revealing a garage.

Esme pulled in quickly and I stepped out of the car slowly, inspecting what I could see of the house. The garage was built in much the same fashion as ours was. There were three cars parked, each covered by a large blue tarp.

"Cullens!" A voice called from the darkness, "We were wondering when you would make an appearance, you're lucky we weren't out!" The voice was followed by three separate giggles. "Please come inside…"

Jasper moved to grab my hand, but I slinked away gesturing for him to take Alice's.

His face looked so pained that I considered just telling them right then and there, but he turned away slowly, going to stand next to Alice.

"I'll be your date," Esme said smiling and taking my arm in hers. I returned her smile and linked my arms through hers, skipping towards a large light which I assumed was a door.

On stepping through the light I was welcomed by a large white room with walls made completely of glass.

"Tanya," Esme said warmly, leaving my side to kiss her host.

I moved slowly to face the woman mentioned. When I looked at Tanya, I wasn't sure if I had found the right woman. She was beautiful, yes, but she was nothing extraordinary. Hell! I looked better than she did!

She had long, strawberry blond hair that tossed around her round face till about waist height. She was wearing a long black dress, split to the thigh and a neckline which really shouldn't have been considered a neckline at all.

She turned to face me, inspecting me thoroughly and I felt a tinge of malice which made me smile.

"You must be Bella!" She said, faking excitement.

"Tanya!" I smiled largely, "It's so good to finally meet you!" I hugged her stiffly, then moved on to the rest of her family.

"Hello," A woman with thick brown hair said politely, "I'm Carmen and this is my husband Eleazar."

I returned her greeting, kissing her on both cheeks, then introduced myself to her husband.

Eleazar was very attractive. He had short black hair that tousled around his head, framing his piercing golden eyes. Both him and Carmen appeared to be of Spanish descent and were both very kind. I wondered how long they had been together and if they had always shared the vegetarian diet.

A small woman hopped up to me who looked about seventeen years old. She was quite short, though not like Alice, and had short pale-white hair.

"Irina!" She said in a sickly sweet voice, "And this is my friend Michal." She said gesturing to a tall man standing shyly at the edge of the group.

"Bella," I said smiling and inspecting this 'Michal.' He was the newest, no doubt, he seemed so shy and uncertain. But he was very handsome. He had longish, dark brown hair and a chiseled chin and cheek bones.

A woman talking to Jasper looked over at me sharply, but smiled softly when she caught my eye. She moved over gracefully, extending a long pale hand.

"I'm Kate, you must be Bella! We've heard so much about you!"

"And I you," I replied, shaking her hand stiffly.

"Well come, sit, sit!" She said to everyone, gesturing to the large, plush couches.

Jasper sat down next to Alice and extended an arm uncomfortably around her. Alice didn't seem to notice however, as she was staring intently at Michal.

"So you're new!" She said happily, smiling softly.

Michal seemed intimidated by Alice's outgoing attitude, but replied politely by nodding.

Irina rubbed his knee roughly and blew a kiss.

"Yes, he's brand-spanking-new!" She said proudly. "We pulled him out of a car accident a couple of weeks ago and changed him."

Michal seemed to wince at the memory, as Irina recounted his tale of loss.

"…And now we're pretty close!" She finished up, smiling sweetly.

I sucked my cheeks in hard not to laugh. I felt nothing but uncomfortableness radiating from Michal, I doubted very much that he was close to Irina at all.

"So…." Tanya said curiously, "Where's Eddy pie and Carlisle?"

I burst out laughing at Edward's nickname and Tanya shot me a piercing glance.

"Sorry," I said still laughing, "Ed**ward** and Carlisle are in Italy talking to the Volturi."

"Oh." She replied simply, clearly disappointed.

"Yeah.." I tutted my tongue, glancing around the glass room.

A minute of awkward silence passed before Kate stood up quickly smiling.

"Would anyone like a beverage? Bear? Mountain Lion?"

"What?!" I asked confused. "You keep animals here?"

"No silly," She said laughing. "We keep the blood, just for emergencies or.. For guests!"

Alice turned to look at me, eyebrow raised.

"Bella, you should probably have something…"

I nodded reluctantly, lightly touching the circles under my eyes.

"I'll have.. Uh… Bear, please." I replied, not accustomed to being served blood from a cup.

"I'll have mountain lion please," Alice asked smiling and tracing a line on her wrist.

"Michal?" Kate asked sweetly, "You should probably have something too!"

Michal looked startled from the attention and glanced briefly at Alice, only to order the same thing.

When Alice caught his eye, he looked down shyly and I was sure that if he was human he would have blushed. His emotions were running haywire, jumping from happy, to nervous, to excited. I realized, with great amusement, that Michal was crushing on Alice!

"Alrighty then," Kate said smiling, "I'll go get us some drinks and then we can get this party on the roll!"

I didn't know if it was the combination of the room's emotions, or perhaps my own sensation, but suddenly I was incredibly excited to start this party.

There was something brewing in the air, something fun and tangible to mold. I could ignore the feeling and roll with where the night took me, or I could grasp the opportunity and try to help a friend.

It didn't take me long to decide on an option.

Tonight. I was playing matchmaker.

**So yes… Not sure what I'm doing with Michal, but do we like him, hate him, hate the idea?**

**Review and tell me what you think!**

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	28. Michal

**Hello!**

**Yay, I received the most reviews on the previous chapter than any chapter so far, so thank you my wonderful reviewers. Although, truthfully speaking, I actually like my usual fifteen crowd. I love getting to know all you guys haha! That sounds really corny, but it's true ****J**** So you others, keep reviewing and join the crowd!**

**Thank you for all the story alerts last chapter too, even you silent readers I love! Hahaha!**

**So, regarding the story. You all seemed to accept Michal relatively well, I thought you would all crucify me or something lol! So there's more of him this chapter, tell me what you think.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

Chapter 28: Michal

Kate arrived backed shortly with several crystal wine glasses, each filled with a different assortment of animal blood.

I snorted loudly, finding the entire situation highly humorous.

Irina shot my a disgusted look, sipping at her 'wine' elegantly, pinky finger twitching outwards.

This only made me laugh harder, as I forced my face between my thighs -muffling the laughter. Did they not realize how preposterous they looked? Sipping at their blood, attempting to look anything other than what they were.

They were animals. We all were.

Drinking the blood from something other than a corpse made it no more dazzling, no more stylish.

"Bella…" Kate's voice called impatiently, breaking me from my stupor.

I looked up to find her staring intolerantly at me. I took the clear glass from her bony hand and swirled the deep red liquid around slowly. The smell was no-where near as appetizing as a hunt, it was bland and lacked that musty smell I found so appealing.

"Bear, wasn't it?" Kate asked suddenly concerned, worried she'd got the order wrong.

"Oh yes, no it's fine…" I replied quickly, "It's just I'm not use to… well you know, this." I said gesturing to the wine glass.

She smiled tight lipped and sipped her own glass slowly, swirling the liquid in her mouth.

I brought the cold glass to my lips and drank cautiously. The liquid hit my tongue, but there was no fire or surge of energy -it was cold. I swallowed it reluctantly as I felt it trickle down my throat.

Jasper smiled at me coyly, feeling my discomfort. I watched as he skulled his blood quickly, swallowing it in one mouthful.

'Get it over with…' He mouthed slowly.

I nodded stiffly, opening my mouth widely and chucked the cool, thick liquid down.

The clatter of glasses was heard on the glass table, as the many wine glasses were flung onto it.

"How about a tour?" Tanya asked excitedly, standing and swishing her long black dress elegantly. "We've had a few renovations since your last visit and I'd love your advice Esme.."

Esme nodded politely and rose to follow Tanya and the others out of the room. I watched as Alice rose to leave with them and I moved to sit quite casually next to Michal.

Jasper stared at me questionably, so I winked at him, gesturing for him to talk with the others.

Michal stared at me shyly for a minute, before speaking very quietly.

"Bella, isn't it?" He asked, the accent of another country seeping through.

I nodded and smiled warmly, moving to sit more comfortably with my legs underneath me.

"How old are you?" I asked, running a hand through my pampered hair.

He stared at me curiously for a moment before answering, as if questioning my friendly motives.

"I just turned twenty a month ago… my birthday was the reason I was here…"

He stared off glumly behind my shoulder, eyes glazing over with horrid memories.

I watched as his eyebrows pulled together roughly and his emotions cannon balled at me, literally knocking me right off the sofa.

"You okay?" He asked concerned, holding a long pale hand out to me.

"Oh, I'm fine.." I answered dismissively, grabbing his strong hand and hoisting myself back onto the couch. "I'm young… like you, so I'm not really use to the whole 'vampire powers' thing!" I said laughing.

He looked at me curiously for a moment, completely confused.

"…I'm an empath," I further explained, "It's kind of a power I have as a vampire. I can feel and manipulate others' emotions."

His eyebrows shot up so high they were now concealed behind his long, rugged locks.

"Vampire's can do that?" He asked incredulously.

"Well not all of them…" I said slowly, suddenly confused as to why the others hadn't explained it. "It's sort of a rare thing that happens, but when you have a certain strong quality or characteristic in your human life, the venom tends to take that a step more… utilizing the characteristic or ability as a power in this life."

He stared blankly at me.

"…I'm not explaining this very well… The others didn't say anything?"

"…No," He answered simply, though I guessed there was something more to it.

He stared out the window for a minute, lost in his own thoughts, then he turned his head slowly to look at me

"When did you… you know..?"

"Die?" I asked bluntly, laughing at his hesitation.

He nodded shyly, staring down at his hands.

"It's okay to ask!" I said smiling and punching his shoulder lightly. "My change was only a couple of weeks ago, but it was that of a voluntary nature so its refreshing to talk about it.. Sort of invigorating."

"I wouldn't know…" He whispered sadly, cradling his head in his arms.

I moved my arm tentatively around his shoulder so that I was giving him a sort of half man hug.

He smiled warmly at me, clearly appreciating the gesture.

"Would you mind if I asked you about your life?" I asked politely, rubbing my hand over his shoulder. "You don't have to…"

"I'd like to…" He whispered softly, "No one here has actually bothered to ask, they were only interested in my job and my skills as a human… wondering if it could benefit them now."

"And these skills were….?"

"I designed gowns…" He answered indifferently, as if the occupation would not interest me in the slightest.

"You were a fashion designer!?" I asked excitedly, the cogs in my brain turning and creating new plans.

"I guess you might say that… But I never really shipped outside of Greece, it was really just a small boutique… 'Sophronia!'" He said euphorically, living in what was now just a shadow of the past.

"I think you'd get on marvelously with Alice," I answered sweetly, "She loves gowns and fashion, I think you could teach her a lot."

Michal's emotions lifted noticeably, showing me the gateway to something more. But just as quickly as they rose, they fell back down again.

"Alice… That's Jasper's wife isn't it?"

_Dammit!_

"Well yes… in a matter of words," I said coyly, glancing up to find him staring intently at me.

"What do you mean?" He asked, clearly interested.

I sighed loudly, glancing at the doorway quickly as if to inspect for intruding ears.

"Well…" I began softly, "Jasper and Alice aren't really together anymore…"

"Really?" He asked, a little overly interested and allowing a little of his emotions to rise again.

I nodded slowly, milking this for all it was worth.

"They just didn't want to say anything because you know what a fuss Tanya would make?"

"Oh yeah I do!" Michal said laughing, showing a slightly brighter, more comfortable side of himself than before.

"Spill!" I said excitedly, feeling like a couple of gossipy girls telling secrets.

He turned to face me, sitting Indian style with his hands tucked beneath him.

"Okay!" He whispered softly, barley able to contain his excitement. "I came back from my first hunt with Eleazar and I felt like crap-"

"Isn't the first just the worst!" I interrupted him, laughing.

"I know!" He said smiling and throwing his hands into the air wildly, "Anyway, so I was pretty down and I may have spilled a tiny, **tiny** drop of blood on the carpet." He pinched his fingers together tightly, trying to emphasize the size of the blood spatter. "So Tanya just flips out! Going on about her recently decorated home and how I've ruined it completely, It was literally the size of a pin head and she's tearing out her hair!"

I burst out laughing, rolling back onto the cream couch and clutching at my sides wildly. Michal joined in, rolling onto his front and kicking his legs into the air laughing.

"..That… Is.. So … what she.. Would do!" I struggled out between laughs, wiping away fake tears from my eyes.

Our laughter slowed to a silent chuckle as we rocked slowly on the plush cream couch.

Michal turned to face me, resting his head on his knees which were tucked beneath his chin.

"Thank you Bella.."

"For what?" I asked curiously.

"For… I don't know.. Making me smile for the first time in like a month, for making me laugh so hard I wanted to cry… you remind me of my sister…"

I caught a sob in my throat, right before it almost escaped from my mouth.

"That's a very sweet thing to say," I said taking his hand. "I've never had a real brother before, but I'd like to think of you how I think about Emmett… If that's okay?"

He smiled warmly, taking my hand and ruffling my hair.

"Newborn siblings then?" He agreed smiling. "God knows I need one know… It's hard living with a bunch of uptight women and only one other male."

An idea slammed into me like a ton of bricks.

"Live with us!" I said excitedly.

He looked at me in disbelief, raising his eyebrows so that they were once again hidden by his hair.

"I can't do that!"

"Why not?" I almost shouted, seeing the whole picture very clearly know. "You could live with all of us, you have to agree it makes sense!"

"How?" He asked skeptically, but I could feel the level of excitement rising.

"Think about it!" I said standing, and circling around the small sofa, "I'm a newborn, you're a newborn. We could hunt together and learn all the hard stuff with another person that knew exactly what we were going through! There'd be no more tiptoeing around for you, I get blood everywhere!" I laughed out, "Nobody minds! Plus you'd have another four guys there to counterbalance the women -It's perfect!"

I was standing right in front of him, leaning in so that we were only a foot apart. I could see his mind running through over what I'd just said as he battled through the pros and cons. He looked up to meet my crazed glance… and smiled.

He didn't have to say anything else, I could see and feel his answer clearly. I stood up straight and smiled largely, nodding my head along to his unspoken answer.

"So what do you say?" I asked, close to hyperventilating with excitement,

"Want to become a Cullen?"

**Do we hate it?**

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	29. The Confrontation

**Yay! We all like Michal!**

**So, as can be expected, I will not be updating till next Saturday -to give everyone time to read Breaking Dawn. Unfortunately, I only get the book on the fourth of August as appose to the rest of you lucky August second people…**

**I will continue writing, so there will be some chapters I'll have stored on the laptop -so I can update straight away.**

**I'm glad you all like this story so much, it will be back before you know it! Lol!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

Chapter 29: The Confrontation

"_Want to become a Cullen?"_

Michal stared at me for about a minute, mouth opening to answer slowly -before shutting again. His emotions were jumping from joy to anxiety to concern to acceptance, and for the first time I was frightened of what his answer might be.

"…B..Bella.." He stuttered out, dragging a stone cold hand through his tangled locks.

"Just say yes," I whispered, releasing the full extent of my persuasiveness upon him.

He sighed loudly and chuckled a deep throaty laugh.

"You're the first person I've met since the change that's actually cared for me… how could I refuse?"

I squealed in delight, grabbing Michal's hands in mine and jumping to and fro from the couch.

"Yayy!"

The high cry startled our semi celebration. Michal and I looked up in unison to see a bouncing Alice, jumping in glee down the stone steps.

"I saw that you were going to ask and can I just say; Yes, oh my god! It is perfect!" Alice squealed out, grabbing both our hands and merging herself into the circle. "You can both learn together and we'll help to introduce him into our world…"

"And guess what!?" I said excitedly, squeezing Alice's hand tightly, "He's a fashion designer!"

Alice dropped her hand from mine and spun quickly to face Michal. Her face wore an expression so awe struck, I was frightened she might pass out.

"Marry me." She asked in all seriousness, dropping to her knees.

Michal laughed nervously, holding out his hands and helping her to her feet. I could tell he was trying to act passive and aloof, but his emotions were soaring from Alice's words.

"Do you think the others will mind?" I asked uncertainly, shuffling my feet around.

"What? Esme and them?" She asked, in disbelief. "I've already seen that **they** love the idea…however…"

"Oh god, what?" I asked fretfully, "Have you seen that Edward freaks out or something, is that it?"

"…No, not Edward…" She said nervously, avoiding the answer.

"What is it then?" Michal asked, taking Alice's hand in his.

The small gesture made both Michal's and Alice's emotions jump through the roof, and I found myself swimming in their private euphoria.

"Hang on… what?" Alice asked, suddenly without a coherent thought.

I giggled softly, earning myself piercing glances from both Michal and Alice.

I cleared my throat loudly, masking the laugh for a throat irritation.

"Anyway…" Alice continued, glaring at me suspiciously, "I said that **our** family took it well, Tanya and the others however… don't quite grasp the situation for what it really is."

"…Meaning?" Michal asked confused, but keeping his hands to himself this time.

"Meaning that Irina sort of freaks out, accusing us of stealing her mate and Tanya stalks away in a huff," She said this all in one breath, staring at the floors and tracing patterns with her toes.

I understood that this wasn't good, but I couldn't help but wonder why Alice's emotions were so down.

"Mate!?" Michal asked exasperated.

"You guys are together…" Alice mumbled, still staring at the floor.

"No we're not!" Michal almost shouted, desperately trying to convince Alice. "I swear we're not, I don't even like her! She's weird and clingy, why would she think we were 'mates'?"

I wasn't sure if it was my sheer determination for her happiness, but Alice's emotions noticeably lifted at his confession.

I shook my head, trying to make sense of all the information I had just received.

"Okay, so obviously Irina feels differently if she thinks you're mates." I said, pacing around the room anxiously. "Do we know when this confrontation will take place Alice?"

"There you are Michal!" Irina called sweetly, running over and jumping next to him.

"Right on time…" Alice mumbled, audible enough so that even I could barley hear.

"Whatcha been doing?" She asked clicking her tongue, as if chewing on bubble gum.

"Well actually…" Michal replied fearfully, "There was something I needed to talk to you about." He glanced briefly at Alice and I, checking if this was okay. I nodded slowly and followed him as he sat down on the cream couch.

Tanya and the others followed down the stairs, But Alice managed to intervene between Rose, Emmett, Jasper and Esme, leading them down to the garage for a minute before returning quietly and joining us in the living room.

I caught Esme's eye and she gave me a small wink and a nod, passing off silent gratitude. Emmett looked ecstatic to the thought of another brother, his emotions were so excitable I had to force myself to stay in one spot and concentrate. Rose smiled warmly, holding Emmett still and Jasper merely raised one eyebrow -knowing very well that I had ulterior motives.

"Okay." Michal said clapping his hands together roughly, "Bella and I got to talking and well…" He sighed loudly, "I'm just going to come out and say it… I was thinking maybe it would be best if maybe, well if maybe I went to live with the Cullens.."

An eerie silence fell upon the group. One might have mistaken it for still and comfortable, but I could feel every emotion pumping from the Denali clan.

Anger. Fear. Anger. Jealousy. Scorn. Anger. Acceptance. Hurt. Sadness. Loss. Anger. Anger. Anger.

Irina rose slowly from her position next to Michal, her body trembling slightly with her anger.

"You're leaving me!?" She screeched, her very voice rattling the plain sheet glass in the window frames.

"Well as I recall, I you were **never** mine to leave!" Michal retorted, allowing his impatience to seep through.

I was sure this time, his words had given Alice's emotions a positive jump. Even going so far as making her smile.

"How dare you!" Irina screamed, "We saved you from death!"

"How!?" Michal asked, jumping from his position on the couch. "By giving me this unlife? By snatching my last resting, my peace? Don't kid yourself Irina, you replaced a quick death with a three day endurance of hell! Not to mention what I had to suffer through listening to your droning voice day after day!"

I couldn't help myself, I laughed.

Everything happened very quickly then. Irina turned to face me menacingly, baring her razor sharp teeth and leaping dangerously through the air. Alice reared up, moving to step in front of me, but Jasper moved quicker -swatting Irina's form away as easy as if it were a fly and growling; creating a sound more frightening than I had ever heard before.

As Alice had predicted, Tanya swept from the room in a huff, mumbling something about her décor. Irina picked up the tiny tatters that were left of her pride and ran, sobbing from the room.

Kate followed after her, not before hissing low at us and spitting at our direction.

"We should go." Esme said simply, picking up her bag and heading towards the garage.

"I'm so sorry.." Carmen said softly, "Irina's been acting very strangely lately, It's really quite petty." She turned to face Michal and smiled, "I'm sorry we couldn't be closer, but I think a part of you never truly belonged here. I hope you find your home with the Cullens."

He moved forward to hug her and she wrapped her delicate arms around his form, muffling her face into his shoulder.

Even this kind gesture pricked a stab of jealousy in Alice, and a part of me reveled in this fact.

Eleazar shook Michal's hand vigorously, grabbing him and patting him on his back.

"Now it's just me and a bunch of women…" He said winking, "How will I live!?"

Michal laughed, hugging him once more.

As he swung his hand back Alice grabbed it in hers, swinging it back and forth.

"Okay, Michal…" She smiled,

"Let's go home.."

**Fluff for final chapter, sorry lol!**

**See you soon!**

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	30. In the Heat of the Night

**I'm back!**

**I hope you all enjoyed reading BD, I know I did! It was nothing that I expected though… And Bella's gift in BD is very similar to the one I gave her lol! Even though mine was solely for the purpose of letting Jasper and Bella not get caught haha!**

**Any who, Sorry I didn't reply to all of your reviews. I just figured some of you would already be reading and you wouldn't get them till a week later.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

Chapter 30: In the Heat of the Night

We drove home through the night, a comfortable string of conversations having set in over the steady bounce of the Jeep.

Esme sat in the front with Rose, discussing what future we had with the Denali coven.

Emmett, Alice and Michal sat in the back; Alice leaning casually against Michal's shoulder as Emmett drilled him about every scrap of information from his human life. I could both hear and feel Michal's hesitation as Emmett probed about his family, delving into his most personal memories, both happy and horrifying.

"Uh.. Emmett," Alice interrupted, looking skeptically from Emmett's eyes to Michal's. "Why don't you tell Michal a bit about the house, I'm sure he'd like some idea of where he's going to live…"

Emmett nodded agreeingly, plunging into a detailed account of our four story house and the beauty of the environment that surrounded it. Michal glanced gratefully at Alice, squeezing her hand and leaning his head against hers.

I squirmed excitedly in my seat next to Jasper, fiddling eagerly with my unused seat belt.

"What are you playing at?" Jasper asked, stilling my hands with his smooth ones. "You're emotions are jumping like crazy, and despite the dim events that occurred with Irina, you've been rather happy."

I winked at him once, mouthing 'later' to him. We couldn't talk here, not with Alice sitting so close. Even if I breathed out my answer, I was doubtful that she wouldn't hear it.

Jasper rolled his eyes, kissing me softly and playing with my hair.

"Woah!" Michal's shocked voice resonated through the cramped jeep. I spun around from Jasper's shoulder to find him staring incredulously at Jasper and I.

The rest of the family stared at him curiously, Esme glancing up to her rear view mirror.

"I guess I just didn't realize that you two-" He said gesturing at Jasper and I, "-were an item…"

The entire car sighed loudly and retreated back to their individual conversations, not entirely shocked by Michal's sudden revelation.

"Yes, yes." I said dismissively, "Let's not rip open wounds again. Alice can explain it to you later. If I try explaining it now, I'm going to make it seem a lot less bad than it actually was."

Alice gave me a pained expression, reaching across the seat to squeeze my shoulder comfortingly.

"Stop torturing yourself Bella. We can't help who we fall in love with."

I smiled ruefully at her, though the emotion behind it did not quite reach my eyes. We still had at least another ten minutes left till we arrived home, and I found myself thoroughly drained by the days events.

"Do you want to hunt?" Jasper asked, tracing the dark lines under me eyes. "I know you had a 'drink' at Denali, but we shouldn't wait too long… it's not safe."

"Oooh! That's a good idea!" Alice said, interrupting our conversation and leaning -not so casually- across Michal's lap. "Michal could come too and we could reign him into our local wild life."

Michal nodded mutely, aiming to suppress his lust with Alice draped over him.

Jasper seemed to notice the change of emotion and a look of pure understanding colored his face. He turned to face me slowly, smiling a menacing smile.

"You little sneaky conniver!" He said tickling me under the arms.

I slapped a hand over his mouth, silencing him before he gave the game away.

"What?" Emmett asked, suddenly interested.

"No it's nothing don't worry, it's nothing!" I looked at Jasper threateningly, "It's **nothing**, isn't it!?"

He nodded, his eyes bright with humor.

Emmett huffed, but didn't press the issue as he turned back to describe in great detail to Michal, what he considered the best hunting prey.

I felt Jasper's smile play behind my hand, before his cool ice tongue darted out between his lips, licking my palm.

My body shuddered against the sensation. I didn't harbor any pleasure point on my palm, but the mere touch of his tongue gave a promise for more.

I looked deeply into his eyes and he seemed to be laughing with the effect he knew he had on me. _Well then…_ I thought to myself,_ two can play at that game.Let's see who snaps first in front of the family…_

I removed my hand from his mouth and slumped into his lap, running my hands over his chest and 'accidentally' brushing my hands over his groin.

I heard him draw in a quick breath of air as his hips involuntarily bucked to meet my hands. I chuckled softly, kissing soft kisses over his neck, darting my tongue out every now and then to moisten his skin. When he didn't object, I blew a cool breath of air over the moist spots on his neck, causing his to shiver softly and dig his hands into the leather of the chair.

"Okay…" He uttered out breathlessly, "You win…"

I smiled happily, moving off his lap to sit in a less improper position and trace my fingers over Jasper's bite ridden arms.

Though I was removed from any unsuitable position, the strong cloud of lust still hung over us. It made my body clammy with want and I shuffled several times in the chair, trying to rid myself from the desire. It would have been all too easy to stifle the emotion with a quick barrier, but I wanted to feel the truth of the emotion, feel it run its course. Jasper and I had not been together since we had 'come out' about our relationship- And as gratifying as angsty sex could be, it was nothing compared to the feeling of pure love, rich and unspoiled.

Jasper's thoughts seemed to mirror my own more or less. He sat staring straight ahead, moving every now and then to cross his legs in a vain attempt to hide the evidence of his desire.

I smiled- A small part of me proud that even though the whole 'getting caught' aspect was gone, he still felt the same way about me. Every want, every yearning intensified.

I was alerted by our return home, from the familiar sound of tires on smooth pebbles. The Jeep rolled smoothly over the drive way, pulling closer to the garage door.

"My god!" Michal cried in awe, pressing his face against the glass of the Jeep's window. "When you said 'house' I imagined something… well, 'house' like! But this… this.."

"You don't like it?" Alice asked, suddenly worried.

"Like it?" He said softly, "It's the most beautiful building I've ever seen… it's a castle. I guess I should have known though.." He continued, looking down shyly. "Where else would a princess live?"

He looked up to Alice timidly, as if he was afraid he'd said too much. Alice looked like she wanted to cry, her eyes glistening with happiness.

"That was a very sweet thing to say," She said softly, taking his hand in hers.

The moment was so sweet and private, I felt like an intruder just being in the same car. The rest of the family must have felt similarly, as they were all staring in different directions out the windows, pretending to see something that interested them.

"You will explain," Jasper said softly. "When we hunt."

I nodded softly and hopped out quickly when we pulled into the garage.

"You just have to see the inside!" Alice said excitedly to Michal, "Any room is yours… provided it's not already taken." She said laughing, "Actually there's a really nice one next to mine, maybe you'll like it!"

Michal's emotions pricked to the height of happiness at her words, I could only imagine what was going through his head.

"Alice could I speak to you.. Alone for a minute," I said, grasping at one of the only opportunities I had.

She looked torn between leaving Michal and talking to me. A part of her even looked like she wanted to just grab Michal and take a run for it.

"I'll only be a minute," I reassured her laughing.

She reluctantly agreed, gesturing for Michal to follow the others inside. I led Alice to the corner of the garage, not before glancing briefly at Jasper to see him pained with an expression of suspicion and concern.

I spoke as softly as I could, not wishing to trouble Jasper further.

"It's about Edward…" I breathed out.

Alice stiffened visibly at the sudden content change. I knew she still wasn't comfortable discussing the heart break of her closest brother.

"I was just wondering if you'd 'seen' anything… he should be back in a couple of days but he hasn't even called. And this is Edward we're talking about, remember? A tad overprotective, so why hasn't he checked in?"

Alice seemed to ponder the information I had just given her, it wasn't like Edward and she knew it.

She blew her a rough blow of air from her lips, making them tremble slightly. "I don't know…" She said throwing her hands in the air, "I'm sure they're fine, but in all honesty Bella.. I've been trying **not** to look out for him."

I just stared at her skeptically, completely unaware of what se was talking about.

"Bella think about it!" She cried out, slumping onto the ground. "Remember how I told you that Edward asked me not to look out for you when we left? Well I've been doing it with him.. I don't want to see him in the pain of heartbreak. I'm afraid that if I look… I'll see it all…"

"Oh I'm sorry Alice, I didn't even think! I'm sorry… really.. God!" I hit my head with my hands, banging out the stupidity. "I'm so foolish, just forget it!"

"It's okay," She said grabbing my hand and hoisting herself up. "You were right though, It is strange they haven't called more often.."

I nodded glumly, why did I have to upset Alice with my stupidity?

"You should get back to Michal.." I said smiling, "I'm sure he's waiting _anxiously_ for your return…"

"And what is that suppose to mean!?" She said in shock, poking me in the chest. "So yes, he's kind and a fashion designer and gorgeous and sweet and Greek and… hang on?" She said shaking her head, "What was I arguing?"

I laughed at her sheer 'Aliceness' and ruffled her pixie hairstyle.

"Now hurry up and get dressed!" She said excitedly, running to the stairs. "I'll meet you outside in thirty minutes!"

Before I could even reply, she had run off -in search of her the Greek god.

I laughed quietly to myself, climbing the stairs to my room's level. Every now and then I would here Michal's excited voice echo through the house. Comments of awe and wonder, completely enthralled my the beautiful house and no doubt, his company.

As I reached my bedrooms double doors I could smell Jasper's strong scent billowing through the air. It was mixed with a light moisture. I pushed open the doors slowly and steeped through to find the room empty.

"Jasper?"

His scent was covered the room, where the hell was he?

My unspoken question was soon answered as I was slammed into the wall, leaving a large dent of the shape of our bodies.

"Hello!" I said breathlessly, as he kissed a trail of fiery kisses over my chest and neck.

"Hello," He replied, mumbling the words into my skin. "I'm sorry for the surprise.. But we have so little time.. And I'd love to make the most of it."

I willingly agreed as I tore the soft shirt from his body, running my fingers over his marble planes.

"Must we always ruin the clothes?" He asked laughing and ripping my dress in two.

I gasped loudly at his carelessness and tore his pants off, throwing his to the bed.

"I **liked** that dress!" I said attempting to sound angry, though in reality sounding lustful and breathless.

"I'll buy you all the dresses in the world… not that you need them," He said, rolling me over and pinning me beneath him. "You look much better naked!"

With those words he ripped the rest of the clothes in two, throwing them carelessly across the room.

"They'll… they'll hear us.." I said, fumbling with his underwear.

"I don't care," He replied, removing them himself and kissing down my chest and across my navel. "I want you. Now."

His words sent a shiver of lust down my spine and I moved my hips up to meet his. I could feel every inch of his body against mine and I reveled in the sensation.

"Look at me," He growled, not in anger -but desire.

I turned my head slowly to look him in the eyes and a low moan escaped my lips. How could anyone be so desirable? Hold so much attraction?

"I love you.." He whispered, then pushed through in one strong thrust. My head swung back like a trigger as I screamed in ecstasy.

I rode into the pleasure but my cries were soon muffled by Jaspers mouth as he kissed me deeply and passionately, devouring my lust with his.

I met each thrust with my own, as the pressure in my abdomen began to grow. Every movement, every touch was accentuated by our own emotions, swimming between one another.

"I want you to scream my name," He whispered breathlessly in my ear. "I want to hear my name roll of your lips in pleasure."

"I can't…. Alice…" I said breathlessly, groaning with each growing thrust.

"She's showing… Michal.. The courtyard.."

"She'll still hear!" I cried in a mixture of frustration and pleasure.

"Scream Bella… For me.. Scream my name…"

Everything was becoming less clear. With each thrust, each kiss I was losing all coherency to speak, let alone argue.

He moved his hand between our legs to touch me. That was the last straw.

I screamed his name louder than I though possible. Forget Alice hearing, by now the entire town would have heard.

Jasper moaned as his own release approached, kissing my hungrily and punching his hand through the head board.

Spent, he rolled off me and swept me into his arms.

"Thank you.." He mumbled, kissing down my shoulders and arms.

"No, Thank **you!**" I replied laughing, "Alice definitely didn't her that." I said sarcastically.

"No, not at all.." He said smirking.

"Well we should probably get dressed into something more 'hunty' for our recreational activities…"

He nodded, rising reluctantly from the bed.

"And who knows…" I continued softly, "Maybe we won't be the only getting lucky tonight…"

**No, Michal and Alice are not going to have sex staright away lol! Don't freak out! They don't even know they're feelings yet, I just liked the line lol!**

**Review!**

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	31. The Missing Puzzle Piece

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 31: The Missing Puzzle Piece

I glanced slowly around the chaotic state that was my room.

There were torn pieces of fabric covering every surface available. Fragments of silk, buckles of belts, cotton shirts, leather shoes.

Would we ever be able to wear an outfit twice?

I picked up a few large pieces of material and realized -much to my dismay- that many of the boxes that held our clothing were still downstairs in the lobby. Clearly there was no clothing items salvageable here, so I had to make-do by wrapping the large bed sheet around me in a somewhat toga fashion.

"What are you doing?" Jasper asked laughing and spinning me around to face the glory of his naked form.

"In case you haven't noticed," I chided, not so subtly staring at his body, "We have no clothing here, so I thought it might be best if I put **something** on before I went downstairs. I know Michal's family now, but I think naked Bella might be a bit too much for him to handle at the moment?"

"At the moment?" Jasper replied, cocking an eyebrow. "Did you have a certain time period set out in which you were planning to show him your nakedness?"

I slapped him playfully, letting my hand scrape down his chest very slowly. As much as my throat burned, it was nothing in comparison to the way my body burned for Jasper. However, before I could take it any further he stilled my hand when it reached his hip bone and smirked, shaking his head.

"Nothing good can come from what you are doing," He tutted, drawing my hands behind my back.

"I'm afraid I'd have to disagree. I believe something **very** good can come from my actions."

He sighed loudly, pulling me into his arms and kissing my forehead.

"My Bella…" He murmured, kissing down my nose and reaching my lips. "I would want nothing more than to never stop touching you and giving you all the pleasure you deserve…"

"But?" I smirked, walking my fingers in soft lines over his abdomen.

"But your control is waning… I can feel it. So I'd rather try and alleviate that little problem now, before it gets any worse."

I tapped my foot impatiently, thinking over his words. He was right, of course he was. But a dominant part of myself didn't want to ever leave his arms; not for thirst, not for company, not for any other thing he deemed a necessity.

"Very well," I huffed, moving towards the door. "I'll be back with boxes and armed with clothing. You-" I gestured to him stiffly, "stay!"

He saluted obediently, stiffening into a rigid pose and smiling.

I poked my head out cautiously, inspecting for anyone who might stumble upon my sheet clad form. On seeing no one, I stepped out quickly into the hall and creped towards the stairs. I could hear Emmett laughing outside, as well as another male voice which I assumed was Michal. No doubt they had heard our little escapade and I was certain Emmett would be filling Michal in on all the hilarities that occurred at the Cullen residence.

Alice's voice resonated from the kitchen, gushing about how well Michal fit into the family.

"He's like the missing puzzle piece!" I heard her cry in glee.

"My fashion sense, his design abilities, we could have the ultimate label! I'm seeing it all now.."

She mumbled off and I heard Esme laugh in great amusement at Alice's enthusiasm.

Figuring I was in the clear, I made a quick dash down the marble stairs and landed at the foot of the staircase. I instantly made note of six boxes that said either 'Jasper clothes' or 'Bella Clothes' and I loaded them up into my arms with ease.

"That's fashionable!" Came a soft, compelling voice.

"Rose!" I cried out quickly, spinning and attempting to re shift my position so that the boxes hid my small figure. "I…I was just-"

She cut me off with a low, soft laugh.

"Bella, you don't have to freak out! It's not like I don't know what you and Jasper were doing," She laughed out, her eyes twinkling mischievously in the light. "And on the bright side," She continued, "At least you don't have to tell Edward, as I'm sure everyone in Italy would have heard your heady scream of 'Jasper' by now."

I cringed when she mentioned Edward. Would he know? **Should** he know that Jasper and I had been physical? I didn't think I could bring myself to tell him -but the moral, ethical part of me knew that he deserved the whole truth.

"Sorry," Rosalie whispered out quietly. "I was joking.. But it wasn't funny."

I smiled reassuringly at her, "Yes it was. And I'm sure some time in the future I'll be able to look back on it and laugh… but that future is many years off… out of sight and out of mind.."

"You coming on the hunt?" She asked with eager curiosity, though I was sure she was just searching for a subject change.

"Oh yes," I joked pointing to my attire, "This is what I wear when I go hunting."

I laughed at grasped the boxes to me tighter.

"I'll be outside in ten minutes… I've just got to go an deliver some much needed clothing to Jasper."

"Take your time…" She whispered suggestively, "I could tell the others to go without you, give you some more 'toga time'!"

"Ha-Ha!" I said sarcastically, turning back in the direction I'd come. "Just tell Alice we'll be out soon. Unless of course **she** would like to leave without us… give her and Michal some bonding time." I winked at Rose and she winked back, clearly understanding the thick meaning behind the words.

I watched as she strutted off towards the kitchen, her long blond hair swishing delicately against her back. Thinking back on it now, I wondered how I ever doubted that they were vampires. Rose -and every Cullen for that matter- had a stature and elegance to them that better suited a fashion runway rather than a high school hall. How could I have ever questioned that they were something more?

I shrugged dismissively and ran back up the stairs towards Jasper. I pried open the door carefully, slipping a leg in and maneuvering the rest of my body plus six boxes in.

Upon dumping the boxes very unceremoniously on the ground, I found that Jasper was still standing in the same rigid position, his arm salting me in a very regal fashion.

"I come bearing clothes," I said regally, extending a hand out to him. "Also permission for you to relax your posture…"

His lips turned up slightly and the ends and he tackled me to the bed, pinning my hands against the headboard and kissing me deeply, his tongue tracing the outer contours of my lips.

"I.. thought.. We said no good.. Could come from this.." I said breathlessly, "Though I'm not complaining…"

"No, no, no," He said laughing and jumping up quickly from our embrace. "That was just punishment for leaving me alone so long."

"Ah, Of course!" I said coyly, sitting up on my elbows. "Well I told Alice we'd meet her in ten minutes, so it's probably best that we don't start something we cant finish."

He looked at me smiling, considering the challenge. I could tell he almost gave into it, but a shrill voice from downstairs broke our focus.

"Commmee onn guyysss!!" Alice whined from downstairs, "I'm getting thirsty and I want to show Michal the animals!"

"Go ahead Alice," I called back loudly, "Jasper and I will catch up soon. We're headed to Kenai National wildlife refuge, we'll follow your scent when we get there… just get to know Michal -I mean with the wild life!" I added quickly, chewing on my lip nervously.

"Okay," Alice replied, a mixture of excitement and anxiety coloring her tone.

I listened, waiting for their departure before jumping into the air giddily, clapping my hands.

"So it's a safe assumption to say that you had more than just family in mind for Michal when you invited him to live here… right?" Jasper asked casually, running a hand through his disheveled hair.

"Well maybe something small.." I replied, winking at him.

"Isabella Cullen! Don't tell me you're trying to play match maker?" He asked in mock shock, slapping a hand melodramatically to his face.

"I'm doing no such thing," I replied softly, ripping open a box and grabbing out a shirt and shorts. "I got all the ingredients together and I was ready, but hun -this cake is baking itself!"

Jasper snorted a loud laugh and threw me into his arms, dropping my sheet in his haste.

"Cake? That's your metaphor? Really?"

"Oh shut up and put these on," I said, chucking him a button up shirt and pants.

"Don't I get underwear? Or have you ripped all mine up in a fit of passion?" He said laughing and dodging the onslaught of shoes I threw at him.

I scowled and then threw him a pair of my underwear. The kind that Alice had bought for me. Lacy. Frills. Black.

"Better?" I asked in all seriousness, lifting my eyebrows.

He held up the dainty fabric between his fore fingers, stretching the elastic to its limits.

"This wouldn't even cover one cheek!" He said in with an appalled expression.

I laughed at his expression and grabbed the panties from him, slipping them on my own form instead. He grabbed my hips, bringing me close to him.

"They look much better on you…"

"Why thank you good sir, but dress now, compliment later." I kissed him quickly on the lips and stuffed a pair of his underwear into his hands, balling the fabric up tightly.

"So you really think Alice is interested in Michal?" Jasper asked curiously, getting dressed so quickly that he was fully clothed before the sentence was over.

"I think she does.." I smiled happily, "Do you know what I heard her call him just earlier? The missing puzzle piece! Isn't that sweet? She of course meant it in a friendly way, but there's something there, Jasper… I can sense it!"

"I'm glad," He said softly, rolling up his sleeves.

"Really?" I asked shocked, "I mean not that I expected you to want her unhappy…"

"She deserves to be happy."

"She does," I agreed, pulling my clothes on quickly.

Once we were both decent enough to hunt I held my hand out to Jasper and walked him to the door.

"Come on," I said kissing him softly.

"Let's get me some grizzly!"

**Ta-Da! **

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	32. Hide and Seek

**Okay, we get to some fun in the woods!**

**Edward and Carlisle return soon… Mwahaha! So many twists still have to happen!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 32: Hide and Seek

We ran silently through the thick, leafy forest; dodging past the trunks like bullets streaking through the night.

We had picked up Michal & Alice's scent ten minutes ago, yet we had searched to no avail and still could not find them. The trail was fresh and recent, but it changed too often. Sometimes continuing straight for a few minutes, before spinning sharply and heading back in a new direction.

After another ten minutes of searching, I began to think that perhaps Alice did not want to be found. Maybe she was going to such extreme lengths because she didn't want Jasper and I to intrude on her personal time with Michal. One part of me was overjoyed at this possibility, yet another part of me was anxious over their apparent disappearance.

"They're fine…" Jasper cooed softly, sensing my growing apprehension. "Michal has never hunted in a comfortable situation before, I'm sure Alice is just trying to offer him a wide, diverse selection."

I nodded silently. Of course Alice would want to share with him all there was to offer. It was Alice. And Alice was always, if nothing else, a fine host.

"We should stop worrying so much over them, and start worrying over **you**." Jasper said quietly, grabbing my hand in his.

"I'm fine," I replied dismissively, darting my head under his shoulder and staring off into the distance.

"Rigghhtt.." He said sarcastically, "You seem like the very embodiment of ease."

I returned his cynical smile and closed my eyes, breathing in a fresh trail.

"Bella, seriously." He said softly, grabbing my waist and pulling me close to him. "You have to start learning to put yourself in front of others. I know it may be a novel experience for you, but your own wellbeing shouldn't be the last thing you think about!"

"I..I.. don't-"

"Yes you do," He answered simply. "And I've had enough of it. You **will** hunt now, or so help me I will force feed a goat down your throat."

I laughed a stubborn laugh and stepped closer to him, linking my arms behind his neck.

"Is that a challenge, Mr. Whitlock?" I asked smiling. "I mean, do you _really_ think you can take me?"

His face held no expression for a minute, but his eyes sparkled mischievously -keen on the apparent contest.

His face slowly twisted into a devilish smile, flashing each razor tooth and licking them in anticipation.

"You're on."

I jumped lithely from his arms, ignoring Alice's trail and running quickly in the opposite direction. I could no longer hear Jaspers labored breathing or the echo of his movements behind my own, so I sought sanctuary at the top of a large tree, molding my body to fit the branches.

A feeling of adrenaline pumped through my veins, mixing with the venom and spurring my stubbornness on. I knew there was no point in hiding when Jasper would so easily smell me, but I hated the thought of him creeping up behind me in the dark -even with my heightened sight.

"Bellaa…."

His voice was like a wind chime blowing in the night. It taunted every one of my senses, causing an involuntary shiver to sweep through my body and down my spine.

"Ohh Belllaaa…" He sung melodically as I fought every desire my body threw at me to give into the sweet voice.

I realized at that moment exactly how dangerous vampires truly were.

Edward had never really released the full extent of his powers upon me before -not intentionally at least. But every word, every syllable of Jasper's voice drew me in, begging me to give into the voice and accept his every demand. The only reason I was still sitting here, clinging desperately to the tree, was because I was also a creature of seduction now. I held the same persuasion and power as every vampire did. However, even **this** did not make me immune to the influence of others.

The honey voice was silent now and I felt my breathing increase another notch, causing me to hyperventilate slightly. I had no reason to be frightened at all, but my body was as stubborn as my mind, and it was acting on past experiences and instincts.

I heard the muffled cry of a elk or moose near by, followed by the ripe scent of blood flowing through the air. The burn in my throat doubled it's scorch, ripping the fire throughout my mouth and making my venom quantity tenfold.

Had Jasper killed the animal to make my will weaken? Or was Alice and Michal nearer than we had suspected?

I creped down the tree trunk slowly, glancing swiftly around me for any movement.

Once I had landed on the moist ground softly, my body instinctively crouched low on the ground, like a tiger ready to pounce.

I crept forward on all fours and a small part in the back of my mind told me that I probably resembled Tarzan. I shrugged it off and inhaled a deep breath of the air around me, searching for Jasper's scent.

On finding none, I stood up slowly and followed the scent of fresh blood in the air.

The honey voice didn't return and I began to stress out over the feeling of being watched. I knew Jasper would bide his time until he could really frighten me, but every hair on my skin stood up on end. It didn't help that the forest was basically silent. Not a sound in the world.

_What is everyone sleeping?!_ My mind cried in hysteria.

As I creped through the dark, wet plants, I eventually stumbled upon the corpse of the drained moose. Any passing person would never suspect any foul play with the moose's death for there were no gashes or missing limbs, just a deep cut at the throat of the beast that even I struggled to see.

Something dark and red caught my eye on a clean, cream tree trunk.

It was writing. But that wasn't what had caught my attention. The words were written in blood. Animal blood.

"When you hide, I will seek." I read the words out slowly as my mind processed the meaning. Jasper was playing with me… and it was working. I was freaking out. This was like some scene from a horrible horror film.

I stumbled back from the words and was caught by two iron hands.

"Boo."

The scream that came from my own throat surprised even me.

Several birds, having awoken from the shrill cry, flew far from my position in the woods. Flying high into the tree canopies and bursting through towards the sky.

Jasper silenced me with his mouth, pushing me hard against the bloodied tree trunk and wrapping his hands through my hair. I could taste the animal's blood on his tongue and I kissed him deeper, eagerly devouring the tang.

After what felt like hours, Jasper released me, laughing a deep low chuckle.

"I win."

I laughed with him, wrapping my hands around his waist.

"Yes you do," I agreed, pushing a stray blond lock from his eyes. "You make one hell of a hunter… It's kind of sexy…"

"Oh, so that was your scream of excitement was it?" He said incredulously, "Because I was under the impression that that was a scream of fright."

"Yeah, yeah…" I said laughing.

"Okay, well since I won -**and** you seemed to enjoy the blood that was in my mouth- what do you say we get you good and fed? Hmmm?"

I nodded willingly, having almost completely forgotten about Alice and Michal.

"And since you've woken almost every animal in the forest…" He continued, "You should have a large selection."

As soon as the words left his mouth I smelt a scent that was absolutely mouth watering. It was warm and intoxicating, pulling me closer in the direction of the smell.

"Is that… is that human?" I asked cautiously, but never slowing my growing pace.

Jasper closed his eyes and breathed in a heady gush.

He shook his head slowly, looking down at me curiously.

"It's not human, but I **never** thought you'd be interested in **that** animal.."

I stared up at him skeptically, "Why? What's wrong with **that** animal?"

"It's a wolf."

My feet stopped themselves this time as I struggled to make sense of what Jasper had just said.

_A wolf?_ I had thought that I would find the very idea of the animal unappealing, but the scent was so invigorating that I had to swallow mouthfuls of my pooling venom in order to prevent drooling.

"It's not a were-wolf," Jasper said slowly, clearing reading the confusion on my face. "In fact, many of our kind enjoy wolves because they're usually so rare and unattainable.. I guess it's sort of a case of wanting what you can't have…"

"**I** want it." I said slowly, suppressing the growing feeling of hysteria in my body.

It wouldn't be long now. I would give in to the thirst and bolt of in the direction of the scent. I would give into my nature and become, once again, the hunter in a deadly game.

"Take it…" Jasper purred seductively in my ears. "Give in to the temptation."

I nodded along, not even really listening to the voice that was steadily growing less clear. It was just me now. Me and my prey.

Before I could even comprehend what was happening, my body was running wildly through the lush forest. My feet never touched the ground and yet I made graceful leaps through the air, jumping from soil to soil.

"There.." Jasper whispered softly, pointing through an opening to a large grey wolf pacing across a rocky precipice.

I crept forward slowly, careful not to alert the wolf to my presence. A part of me thought it odd that the wolf was alone, but another was also glad that I wouldn't have to slaughter more than one.

I sunk my body low to the ground, coiling inwards like a spring, then I flew through the air, landing directly on the wolf's back.

A deep, guttural growl resonated through the wolf's throat as he turned viciously to snap at his predator. It's sharp, pointed teeth did nothing to my marble skin as it snapped ferociously at my arms and neck. My teeth were at it's throat in less than three seconds as I mumbled against the furry flesh;

"Sorry,"

And then I sliced my teeth through, lapping up the warm blood and drinking hungrily until the animal stopped shaking. I wrapped my fingers around the tough fur and lifted the animal above my head, letting gravity pour every last morsel of blood into my eager mouth.

I stood up from the lifeless corpse and backed away into Jasper's waiting arms.

He moved his index finger and traced it around my bottom lip, picking up the left over traces of blood on his finger tip.

"Cheers," He said smiling and putting the finger in his mouth.

I shivered at the sight and he laughed softly, knowing very well the effects he had on me.

"Shall we find Alice and Michal then?" I said quickly, shaking several memories and fantasies from my mind.

"Yes…" He said still laughing, "I think that would be best."

As we walked through the still, quiet forest the first light of morning broke through the dark trees.

It was morning.

The seventh day.

Edward was coming home.

**Haha! He won't be home first thing next chapter.**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	33. First Light

**Hello!**

**Sorry this chapter took longer to update, but UGH! I had so many assignments…**

**Anyway, hopefully this chapter will make up for the lateness,**

**Finally, this chapter is dedicated to gemin****, and she knows why lol!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 33: First light

The light grew brighter at the end of the forest, as if only to confirm the growing events of the day.

I watched as it illuminated the dewy plants at the far edge, then slowly moved forward, encompassing more and more of the forest with each passing second. The Evergreen's fine pine needles seemed to glisten and glow as the sun sought out small rain drops dripping down the pins, casting brilliant reflections across the forest floor.

And then something hit me.

There was sunlight. There was sunlight and I was still standing here in the shade like an idiot.

I ran forward through the dense shrubbery, ignoring Jasper's booming calls of confusion.

"Bella? What are you doing? What do you see?"

His voice grew closer and closer as he ran, full speed, after me. Obviously he suspected something was wrong, and a small part of me -somewhere deep inside- felt bad for causing him unnecessary worry. But the dominant part of me was ecstatic at the opportunity of finally, after several weeks of waiting, being able to go out in the sun.

I reached the edge of sunlight and was hit by a wave of déjà vu. Had it not been Edward in this very same position three years ago? It was a different location and a different purpose, but he too had stood anxiously at the edge of a shadow, waiting to step into the light.

A strange feeling swept through me at this revelation. An eerie, uncanny sensation that swept through the very foundations of my being. It made my spine twist uncomfortably and my stomach turn. What the hell was going on?

"Bella, what are you doing?" Jasper asked, snapping me out of my daze and grabbing my hand in his.

I turned to face him slowly, mulling over the passing feeling of unease.

"Bella!?" He groaned, clicking his fingers in front of my face. "Snap out of it!"

"Sunlight.." I whispered out slowly, listening to the syllables roll of my tongue and echo through the quiet forest. "I just wanted to see… the sunlight."

"Yes…" He said slowly, smiling and nodding his head. Evidently, he thought that I'd lost my mind. He was talking to me like a child recovering from a concussion, which wasn't far off from the way I was feeling.

"Sorry," I said, shaking me head and clearing the thick daze setting in. "Weird.. Déjà vu thing… it's passed now."

He took my head between his hands and massaged my temples, blowing fresh breath over my face.

"Better?" He whispered softly, kissing my eyelids.

"Hmmm…" I murmured, concentrating on the soft feeling of his lips on my skin.

"Hey!" I cried, snapping my eyes open and swatting him away. "You distracted me with your devilish lips! Sunlight. Now!"

"Yes Ma'am!" He saluted, laughing and jumping over the invisible line between sunlight and shadow.

It took me a moment for my eyes to believe what was standing in front of me, but when then did I felt as if my heart might burst from the mere sight.

Jasper in the sunlight was like nothing on earth. His skin shone like a thousand crystals embedded under a fine film of glittery silver. What made it more magical were the hundreds of scars scattered up his forearms and shoulders in a perfect disarray of half crescent moons.

"Will you be joining me?" He laughed, allowing a stream of sunlight to bounce of his perfect teeth, reflecting a brilliant light in my eyes.

It was all I could do not to drool, so I nodded without speaking and pushed a toe across the shadow to join Jasper.

As my foot was thoroughly covered by the pale tennis shoe, I could safely assume that it was not sparkling in the sun the way Jasper was.

"Are you coming?" He asked, staring at me incredulously. "I mean, you run away from me and then what? You stand in the shade like a coward?"

"Hey!" I cried in protest, insulted by his callous words. "I'm just trying to savor the moment!"

He looked at me disbelievingly and then extended one diamond covered hand towards me.

"When you hide, I will seek… " He whispered, repeating the same words he had written in blood not one hour ago. They seemed to hold such a different meaning now than they had then, so much kinder and more supporting.

I linked my hand carefully through his, as if the very fragments of his skin might shatter. His skin seemed warmer, more alive.

"It's not scary," He said softly, pulling me across the shade to stand by his side.

I squinted my eyes closed in anticipation. This moment would only happen once and I wanted to make them most of it.

Jasper once again took my head between his hands and rested his forehead against mine.

"Open your eyes, you look beautiful."

I peeked one eye open and stared down at my hand which was lying casually across Jaspers chest. It was beautiful.

It looked as though it had been carved from diamond stone, each finger, every crease embedded with a thousand stunning crystals, shining in a glittery haze.

"Oh my!" I shouted loudly, taking the hand in question and brushing it through my hair. "I really am beautiful!"

"Is that so hard to believe?" He asked smiling and leaning in closer to press his diamond lips against mine.

I melted into the kiss and wrapped my arms around his neck, leaving my eyes open so that I could watch as our two glittering bodies tangled.

"We look good don't we?"

I broke away from Jasper and stared out towards the source of the sunlight.

The voice had not come from Jasper, but from Michal, who was standing very still and shimmering like a crystal while Alice danced towards me.

"Well, well, well…" I said tutting my tongue, "Where have the two of you been? Up to no good I suspect…"

If Alice could have, I was sure she would have blushed a deep scarlet red. Instead, she stared down at the ground intently, suddenly mesmerized by the pattern of the dirt under her shoe.

"Ohhh! Something **did** happen!" I said laughing, "I can see it all over your face Alice! You're easier to read than I am!"

She glanced up from her dirt fascination and shot me a pleading expression, begging me to let it go.

I nodded to her slowly, knowing very well I would corner her when we returned home.

"How did the hunt go Michal?" Jasper asked, with sudden vigorous enthusiasm. "Does the animal array here live up to Denali National Park?"

Michal laughed a deep, low chuckle, shaking the trees around us.

"Even if there had only been birds here to eat, I guarantee you it would have topped any hunting expedition I partook in Denali. The air is fresher, the atmosphere is comfortable… and the company had improved a lot too.." He said shyly, glancing up to meet Alice's equally timid eyes.

"Well then," Jasper said very finally, "If we're all done hunting we should probably head back home… Seventh day today and I'm sure we'll need to organize things for Edward and Carlisle."

"They're coming back today?!" Alice asked in shock surprise. Clearly she had wanted the small patch of paradise we'd found to survive a little longer too. I was confident that Edward wouldn't completely explode, but it was an inevitability that things were going to change… a lot. I wasn't sure if I'd ever feel this way again, so free and loved.

"They should be… We haven't really spoken to them since we first moved in," Jasper continued, shuffling around awkwardly while his emotions plummeted into guilt and denial.

Alice nodded slowly, absorbing all the information and counting the days back on her hands.

"So what's the deal with them again?" Michal asked cautiously, breaking the solemn mood that had set in.

Jasper stared at me with a perplexed expression, wondering how to proceed.

"I'll take this one," I said softly and turning to face Michal.

"Okay, this is confusing so listen up! Edward is my husband, he changed me a few weeks ago and then left to tell the Volturi about my new life. He doesn't know that I have fallen in love with Jasper and seems to be pretty adamant about keeping our lives the way they are.."

Michal nodded along slowly, scrunching his eyebrows together every now and then when I talked about the Volturi or Italy. Clearly Tanya and the others had planned for Michal to live a very sheltered life.

"…Carlisle is the father figure of our coven. He's married to Esme, who you've already met. He also has no idea what's happened between Jasper and myself, but I think it might be better if Jasper tells him… He's known you longer," I directed to Jasper, to which I received a small nod as he squeezed my hand.

"The thing is, I need to tell Edward by myself. He won't take it well, but he'll take it a hell of a lot better alone than with a whole bunch of people around."

"Okay," Michal said slowly and nodding his head. "That doesn't sound to confusing."

I smiled at him and raised my eyebrows. "I'm not finished yet."

He let out a low laugh and gestured for me to continue.

"The thing about Edward is, he had this irritating habit of being able to read everyone's minds-"

"Woah!" Michal interrupted me smiling, "That's so cool!"

Alice, Jasper and I all stared at him. Words were not needed.

"…sorry, continue."

"But I can counteract his talent with a little talent of my own. I don't want to get into details about it now, but basically, I can sort of 'protect' your mind from the invasion."

Michal slapped a hand to his mouth in awe, but said nothing. No doubt fearful of how we may reprimand him.

"Well, I think that's all you really need to know…" I said sighing and dusting my hands together as if I had finished some laboring, physical task. "If you have any other questions just ask Alice, she knows what's going on better than I do anyway.."

Alice gave me a grimaced expression and returned to tracing her foot into the dirt.

I laughed to myself.

_What happened between the two of them? Why was Alice suddenly so embarrassed to be alone with Michal?_

"We should go home then," Michal said thoughtfully. It was the first time he'd referred to our house as a home. Not a residence or a castle, but a home. I was suddenly incredibly happy that I had been the catalyst for his bond within our family. The reasoning behind my decision may not have been entirely honest, but I was thankful that he was now my brother and that he was content with this lifestyle.

"Uh, Bella?" He asked laughing and snapping me out of my musings. "You want to start walking then?"

"Oh shut up funny boy!" I scowled, running after him and swinging myself onto his back. "If you want to get home so badly you can carry me on your back!"

He laughed softly then made an odd sort of snorting, huffing noise that I assumed was suppose to be a horse.

Alice let a soft, satisfied giggle, but stared away timidly when Michal returned the smile.

He shrugged dismissively, running off towards the house at full speed. I was surprised at how quickly he seemed to adjust into our lives. Alice was right, he **was **the missing puzzle piece. He knew just how to make me laugh, but it was never inappropriate. He could be sweet and sentimental, without being smothering. And he was happy and comfortable with each of us; offering support when we needed it and giving us space when we didn't.

Before I could even comprehend what was happening, we were soaring air born over a gushing silver stream. The sunlight hit the water at just the right angles, making it appear to shimmer and shine just as we were.

"Pretty, huh?" Michal asked when we landed at the other side. "Alice and I found it while we were hunting, I thought you might like to see it…"

"It's beautiful…" Jasper said softly, landing gracefully on my other side. "Sort of luminous.."

"And its really warm too," Alice smiled softly, seeming perfectly at home among the picturesque fairytale nature of the environment.

I felt a twinge of jealousy among her words and I hopped quickly of Michal's back, prancing lithely to stand by Jasper's side.

"We should bring the others back here.. Provided that we're still a family," I whispered sadly, leaning against Jasper's stone chest for support.

"Give them time," Jasper breathed through my hair, "They can't stay angry at us forever…"

I snorted softly, but I said nothing further. I just lay against his chest and listened to his breathing as it struggled in and out through his windpipe.

After only minutes, we began our slow walk back towards the house. There was no point in running any more. They would come when they came, no amount of rushing or time saving could prevent it.

I walked slowly, entangled in a twisted embrace with Jasper. Michal swung his arm over Alice's shoulder and she rested her head softly on his shoulder, committing this moment to her memory. It felt like we were marching to death row, every step bringing us closer to destruction. I wanted more than anything to believe we'd be fine, but I couldn't help but wonder how we'd make it through alive. The time had passed too quickly, I wasn't ready for this yet. How could I do it? Destroy so many relationships with just a few simple words.

Mere minutes had passed and the large stone home came into view. Esme was in the back garden, utilizing the sunny opportunities to do some gardening while Rose and Emmett set up the patio furniture and sun umbrellas. Anyone might have assumed that we were preparing for a party, getting ready to welcome back our guests. How wrong they would be in their assumptions.

"Ah, you're back!" Esme welcomed warmly when we came into plainer view. "I hope the hunt was enjoyable. Uh, Bella? I was wondering if I might speak to you for a minute?"

I smiled and nodded once, releasing Jasper from my arms and skipping over to join Esme in the garden.

"They called."

I sucked in a quick gasp of breath. The air flooded through my lungs and worked to clear the uncomfortable nausea setting in.

"I thought maybe they'd be back before even you were, but you're here now."

I nodded again. I didn't want to interrupt her now, I needed to know the facts as they were. Distractions would just delay the unavoidable.

"They called just before dawn, so their flight should be landing pretty soon. Which means…."

"Yes?" I inquired, pressuring her to just say it.

"Which means they should be home within the hour."

Suddenly the air in my lungs seemed to clot. No longer did it provide comfort, but rather worked to suffocate me from the inside. I took shallow gasps of air, grabbing Esme's shoulder for support.

"An hour?" I spluttered out incomprehensibly. "They'll be home in an hour!?"

Esme nodded apologetically.

"I would have told you sooner, but-"

"No, no," I interrupted her, "It's not your fault. I knew this was coming."

"There's something else," She whispered out somberly. "Carlisle said there was something we needed to discuss when they arrived… or rather, some**one**."

I had no idea what that meant, but I didn't have time to procrastinate. I gave my thanks to Esme, then wandered of aimlessly towards Jasper.

I stumbled through the house without direction, surprising myself by bumping into polls every now and again. Apparently some of my human traits **had** transferred into this life, but they only revealed themselves in dire situations.

I eventually found Jasper in the entrance hall, sitting amongst a pile of boxes with his head in his hands. He was so absorbed in his own mind that he didn't notice me until I slumped down next to him.

"They're coming." I whispered out gravely, linking my hand through his.

He looked up and his troubled eyes only reflected the way I was feeling.

"I know," He whispered our hoarsely, "I heard Esme."

"How did we get here?"

Jasper put cheek against mine and stroked his fingers through my hair.

"Love, I suppose."

"It's worth it," I said quickly, careful not to mislead Jasper into thinking I would want things any other way.

"It's worth more than anything I could ever give."

We stopped speaking then.

There was nothing more to say, it had all already been said. A somewhat comfortable atmosphere settled over, loosening the knots in my muscles and stilling my unsettled stomach.

At some point we rose from our squatted position amongst the boxes and wandered back towards the rest of the family. I felt like I should be doing something, preparing for their arrival or what not. But how could I prepare? What preparation could there possibly be that would aid me in my task?

We sat at the round glass table that Emmett had set out and slowly, one by one, the members of my family moved to sit down around us. We sat and we talked about the good times. The hunts and the games, the battles and the rewards. Emmett entertained us with several embarrassing stories about past lives and decades. Alice in particular hid her head shamefully when Emmett proceeded to detail the many bad fashion taboos of the sixties.

Time seemed to fly by excruciatingly fast, each tick of the wide clock counting down their return. It seemed like only minutes had past before the familiar sound of wheels on pebbles alerted us of a presence outside.

"They're here," Alice said softly, though each one of us heard the words perfectly.

I turned my family and took in all their faces. Faces that meant so much to me.

"I need to block your minds from Edward," I said slowly, making sure each of them understood that it was me alone who would speak to him. "He'll know something is up, but I can't risk him finding out anything before I've spoken to him."

They all nodded agreeingly. Even Emmett, my usual playful bear of a brother nodded seriously, standing up to give me a reassuring hug.

"Go get 'em tiger," He smiled, knocking me jaw lightly with his fist.

I grabbed his fist with my hand and squeezed it softly.

"Thank you."

I closed my eyes tightly and focused all my energy on creating a guard between the minds of my family and Edward. I felt every ounce of my strength focus into one single point before it exploded in it's final release, working it's way into the minds of every family member.

As my family departed inside, Jasper came up behind me and buried his face into my hair.

"I don't want to forget this, I don't ever want to forget your smell."

"Hey!" I said harshly, forcing him to look at me. "This is **not** the end. I am still your girl."

"Forever and ever?" He asked, smiling like a teenage boy in love.

"Until the end of time."

He gave me one last hug before taking my hand in his and walking through towards the lobby, blending us in casually with the rest of the family.

We all watched in wonder as the black Mercedes pulled to a halt outside the double opening doors. The tinted lack windows gave us no indication of what was inside, but we peered intently as the drivers door opened and out stepped Carlisle, looking very worn and disheveled.

Esme's emotions peaked to the height of their happiness, radiating of her like heat emission waves, influencing all of those around her and creating a temporary euphoric bliss.

I welcomed the false happiness for a moment, letting it flow through my veins and help to erase the guilty poison.

Carlisle's eyes linked with Esme's and in that moment it was as if everything in the world just flew away. I was nothing but a bystander, watching as Esme ran from the lobby and wrenched open the front door, throwing herself into Carlisle's eager arms and swinging each other back and forth on the spot. I wished more than anything for that to last, for the relationship to stay unchanged from the truth I would soon unleash upon them. I wanted them to stay blissfully in love, comforted by their many 'children' in a happy, content home.

But dreams were rarely reality.

Edward climbed from the passenger seat like a god of beauty and strength. He was still heartbreakingly beautiful, but he held not one ounce of the attraction that Jasper did.

He caught my eye and smiled a dreary, weak smile. He was worn and tired, though he would receive no rest. I was torn between continuing the façade that I had already created and staying far from him, but ultimately decided it would be best if I stayed inside. Why give him false hope only to rub raw salt in the wounds?

Emmett however was still the big brother. He ran from the room and tackled Edward into a bone crushing hug. Rosalie followed soon after, kissing both his cheeks and uttering welcomes.

_Well there's no point in staying inside now, is there?_ My mind chided, forcing my legs to move on their own accord and follow the others outside.

I moved stiffly and robotically towards Edward, my breathing rate increasing dramatically. Would he kiss me? Would Jasper hate me for kissing him back? Or should I politely push him away and ask to speak to him now?

A thousand questions rang through my mind, each confusing me more than the next. It was too late to contemplate, I was standing mere feet from Edward and with a few more steps I would be standing in front of him.

It was here. The time had come. Speak dammit, speak!

"Edward…" I breathed out drearily, wrapping my arms around him in a fashion that looked as if I was frightened of him burning me.

"Bella," He whispered back, wrapping a hand through my hair and smothering his face into the crook of my neck.

I giggled nervously and softly -but persistently- pushed him off me.

"Edward, we need to talk about something."

He was silent for a minute before sighing and leaning against the car.

"I know."

_What!?_ My mind screamed, _He knows? What does that mean? Did Esme already tell him?_

'_**Too many questions!'**_ I screamed back, _**'Let me think!'**_

"Bella," Edward continued, "There's something I need to talk to you about, to all of you," He said gesturing towards the rest of the family.

"Now, Edward?" Carlisle asked in a concerned tone, "Are you sure?"

What the hell was going on? I thought **I** was the one with the huge secret! What were they talking about?

At that moment, the back door of the Mercedes opened sluggishly. It seemed to open excruciatingly slowly, drawing out the torture for as long as was acceptable.

A pale, small hand grasped the top of the door frame and a timid young face with dark brown hair appeared above it. The girl was smiling hesitantly and seemed fearful of the large, shocked family leering at her.

"My family," Carlisle said formally,

"I'd like you to meet Caterina Lucetta.."

**Okay, now I'm going to tell you something for which you are going to hate me..**

**I can't update tomorrow because everything is just snowballing at the moment, but I will try to update the next day.**

**Reviews provide motivation!**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	34. Introductions

**So many of you thought that Caterina was Edwards secret girlfriend lol! You're in for a surprise hehehe.**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 34: Introductions

"_I'd like you to meet Caterina Lucetta.."_

For a moment my mind was silent. The only thing I was vaguely aware of was the raspy intake of air that seemed to struggle slowly through my windpipe.

But the moment passed.

Question after question cluttered through my mind like traffic on a one-way street. It blew threw my head in a gut wrenching scream, deafening my ears and making it nearly impossible to speak.

Who was she? Why was she here? Where was she from? How old was she? Was she and Edward involved? Would she join our family? Did she possess some power?

The questions grew faster and less clear, melding together in a solid buzz of noise.

"Enough!" I cried loudly, throwing my hands to my ears and silencing the blare.

Edward was the first to react. He rushed to my side and threw me into his arms, cradling me the way a parent would a child. I pushed uselessly at his restraints, shaking my head and inwardly cursing myself for crying it out loud.

"It's okay Bella…" He whispered soothingly, pulling my flailing arms against his chest and holding me tightly against him.

I continued to fight for a few more minutes, but at some point I stopped struggling and relaxed against his stone body. I immediately regretted it.

I felt a strong blast of sorrow from Jasper who was standing stiffly at the edge of the stone steps, struggling to fight the urge not to rip me from Edward's embrace right now. He thought he was losing me. I could see it etched painfully across his angelic face. He thought he was losing me to someone that I cared for no more than Esme or Emmett.

I pushed back from Edward's strong grasp and returned to standing passively between Jasper and Alice.

"I'm sorry," I said slowly, directing it solely to the new comer. "You just gave me a bit of a shock… We certainly weren't expecting Carlisle and Edward to bring someone home."

"Not that we mind in the least," Esme added quickly, smiling comfortingly at Caterina.

Caterina returned the smile timidly but said no words, clearly my little outburst had frightened her.

"Well then," Carlisle sighed softly, "I suppose we have a lot to discuss. After all, Edward and I are not the only ones in need of some explaining…"

It was at that point that I remembered Michal's presence. He was not standing outside with the rest of us, but rather, leaning somewhat awkwardly against the rich, terracotta sandstone. I realized that he would have been in a more confusing predicament that the rest of the family put together. But he **was** family now and he **should** be a part of these things.

"Michal! Come over here," I said smiling and gesturing towards our family that stood cluttered around the black Mercedes.

He stood up shyly and wandered over slowly to stand half hidden behind Alice's tiny form. I almost laughed at how odd the image of the two of them appeared. Michal cowering hesitantly behind tiny Alice, who stood protectively in front of him as if wary one of us might attack.

"Guys, this is Michal!" I beamed happily.

The words were spoken like a proud parent, showing of her handsome son to the apprehensive crowd of onlookers.

Michal whispered a soft hello, only briefly meeting the intrigued glances of Edward and Carlisle before returning to stand in Alice's shadow.

"It's wonderful to meet you Michal," Carlisle whispered politely, nodding his head and smiling warmly.

Edward seemed hesitant to welcome the stranger, as if suspicious of his pure intentions. Inthat moment I was grateful, once again, that I had someone like Jasper who loved me.

Jasper had accepted Michal completely when he knew that he was joining our family. He didn't even know the reasons behind my decision, but he had been considerate and kind to Michal since day one. Edward's initial reaction was to act prudishly and aloof, as if he didn't care enough to form an opinion.

"Let's go inside then," Edward muttered dismissively, extending a sinewy hand to Caterina to which she happily took.

I watched as her face lit up with joy from the mere contact of Edward's skin and a look of bliss colored her features.

Did Italy girl have a crush on my husband?

This possibility bothered me more than it should have.

I had Jasper now -and Jasper was more than anything I could ever deserve. But Edward was my first love, and the idea that someone else wanted him the way I had once wanted him seemed unusual and out of place.

I should have be elated that Edward had someone in his life that could replace me… but I didn't. To be honest, I was pissed.

I was so wrapped up in my own thoughts, that I hadn't even noticed that the rest of the family had long departed inside, leaving me standing foolishly alone in the cool morning breeze.

"Are you going inside?" Jasper asked softly from behind me, utter sadness coloring his tone.

I spun to face him quickly and collapsed against his stone body.

I didn't care anymore. I wanted out from this hell, I wanted it to be over.

"Shhhhh…" He whispered softly into my hair, "It's almost over now. Let's just get the introductions over and then we can tell him. We can tell him and just finish this…"

"You mean, **I** will tell him Jasper. I don't want you anywhere near him when this comes out."

He stared at me skeptically, as if hurt by my plight to protect him.

"Jasper, please!" I said, lowering my voice as low as I could. "If he gets angry… if he loses control, I will not have you near him!"

His eye's softened at my words and he stroked his index finger from chin to my cheek.

"Bella, If he explodes, I don't want **you** anywhere near him…"

I nodded, but I knew very well that if it came to a fight, I would gladly lay my life down to save Jasper's. The problem was, he would do the same.

"Bella, come on!" Alice boomed from inside, interrupting our precious moment and shattering our small amount of peace.

And I knew it was our final one. Our final minute of peace before devastation.

We walked back to the house slowly, savoring the silence. When we finally lumbered inside to join the others, they were already discussing Michal and the origin of his family.

_Good._ My mind thought softly. I didn't want to have to face Edward's judgmental glances anymore, especially not when he found out that I was the cause for Michal's move.

"Ah, Bella, Jasper!" Carlisle welcomed us smiling. "We were just about to ask Caterina to speak, so if you wouldn't mind.." He gestured to the empty chaise lounge and I moved robotically to sit on it.

Jasper moved to lay his arm tentatively behind me and Edward leered at the close proximity between the two of us. I probably should have slinked away from Jasper's touch, but I'd given up. Edward could assume what he wanted from our body language. After tonight, he would know everything anyway.

Caterina cleared her throat and the entire family spun to stare expectantly at her.

"Hello," She said in a small voice, which perfectly reflected how I imagined she felt at the moment. "As Carlisle said, I am Caterina Lucetta… I supposed you'd like to know why I'm here…"

Everyone but Edward and Carlisle nodded along, mouths agape.

"Well… I am twenty years old and for seven years of my human life, I lived with the Volturi."

She paused when we all gasped and fumbled awkwardly with her fingers, clearly embarrassed by the attention. When we had all recovered from the shock, she continued.

"They found me on one of their 'hunts' around the city. They'd already killed my parents, but they wanted to keep me because they thought I'd have potential as a vampire, I was a gifted child but… they were wrong."

Any contempt I had held towards her disappeared as quickly as it had began. She was an orphan. But worse than that, she was a vampire orphan that had been treated like a prisoner for seven years of her life. I felt a sob catch in my throat as I fought against tears that would never relinquish themselves.

"I'd been living with them for five months before Edward and Carlisle came to Volturi. They had been trying to get me to feed off humans for months but I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't take a human life the way they had taken my parents. That's probably the only way I made it through the first couple of weeks, after that I started hunting animals just off the grounds. Aro wasn't happy with it, but else could he do? They were all growing weary of me… and I'm certain that if Carlisle hadn't come when he had, they would have finished me…"

I couldn't hold it back any longer; a loud, strangled sob ripped from my throat and I sobbed against Jasper's shoulder. I felt a surge of empathy from several others in the room and I assumed that they were feeling the exact same way.

"Jasper please, I'll take her…" Came Edward's irritated voice.

That was the last straw. The very last string that could hold on. Jasper was offering comfort and because of Edward's petty jealousy issues he wanted me to go without?

I threw myself from Jasper's arms and stared Edward long and hard in the face.

"Edward, outside. Now!"

He didn't even notice the harsh tone of my voice, he simply nodded, kissed me on the lips and grabbed my hand. I moved from his side and stalked out the front door, walking hard and fast into the surrounding forest.

Edward skipped merrily behind me and came to a graceful halt just to my left.

I slumped against a thick pine tree and sighed loudly.

"Edward, we need to talk…"

**I know, I hate me too lol! But I honestly really don't like this chapter and I don't want to write the 'talk' when I feel like I'm crap!**

**I WILL update tomorrow. A BIG chapter!**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	35. Truth and Violence

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 35: Truth and Violence

"_We need to talk…"_

Edward smiled agreeingly and moved to stand not a foot away from me.

"Anything you'd like, my love," He whispered softly, running his hands over my waist and abdomen, then pinning them either side of my head.

I smiled weakly and leant back as far into the tree that I could, attempting not to encourage him. If he tried to kiss me now, I couldn't be held accountable for my actions; I **would** stop him.

"Edward, this is serious…" I sighed, ducking underneath his arms and staring off towards the trees.

Edward chuckled a low laugh, grabbing my wrist and forcing me to face him.

"Sounds serious… You're all 'avoidancy,'" He snickered, wrapping his hand around my waist and pulling me close to him.

This was impossible. How could I talk to him when he thought it was all a big joke? He had no idea how drastically his life was about to change, let alone the bonds that were about to be broken.

"Edward, please.." I needed him to listen to me, so I sunk to the lowest level of my being; I pouted.

I should have expected what would happen next, after all, I **did** basically ask for it. Edward eyed my pouted bottom lip and leant in quickly to seize it between his. I felt my stomach squeeze itself together into a ball, as I fought all natural instincts to hit him.

_It'll be over soon, hold out, just hold out._ I repeated the mantra over and over in my mind as my body turned to unemotional stone beneath Edward's passionate lips.

His kisses were tender and fervent, which only made my guilt worse. He loved me. Loved me more than anything in the world, the way I felt about Jasper.

After several minutes, he broke away from my lips and left his cheek against mine, breathing into my ear.

"I've missed you…"

I caught a sob before it could reach his ears and merely nodded against his skin. I was careful not to return his kind words, but I wanted to acknowledge that I'd heard his.

He pulled away from me and must have recognized the sadness in my eyes because for the first time that afternoon, his face changed into a serious expression.

"What's wrong my love?" He whispered, tracing the shape of my lips with his fingers. "Is it Caterina Lucetta? I know I should have called, but the Volturi were hesitant about letting her return with us. We weren't sure if we could even get back.."

"It's not Caterina," I interrupted him, leaning away from his touch.

This was it. I had to tell him now, or never speak up again. I paused for a minute to memorize his face. This is how I wanted to remember him; Calm and concerned. I was sure that after today I would never again see him act so comfortably around me, if he could stand to be around me at all.

"Edward, I need to tell you something and it's not something you want to hear…"

He raised his eyebrows in a mixture of amusement and confusion, smiling wryly at me.

"Trust me Bella, I've been stuck with mostly men for a week. I'm so glad just to hear your voice, that any news from you is good news…"

I looked up to meet his pleased expression and I felt as though my heart might just shatter.

"…Not this news." I whispered gravely. "Edward, this is worse than anything I've ever done -and it's something that you **can not** fix."

His eyebrows scrunched together in a state of pure worry and he grabbed my hands and held them close to his heart.

"What ever it is, I'll still love you…" He promised, tentatively brushing a stray hair from my eyes.

I could actually feel the tiny pieces of my heart shattering and burning as he spoke those words. Why did he have to be so sentimental and loving? Why wasn't he acting aloof and indifferent to it all.

"Edward," I choked out, feeling the sobs shatter through my throat. "I don't want you to feel like that. You **shouldn't** love me.."

Edward looked as if I had slapped him. His emotions sunk into a deep pit of sadness and confusion as his mind tried to make sense of my words.

"What are you talking about Bella? You don't want my love?" He asked skeptically, releasing my hands from his strong grasp.

I shook my head like an infant and backed away from his scorching stare.

"I don't deserve it… none of it!" I cried out sobbing. "You should be with someone who can be with you entirely and love you with their entire being."

He followed after my retreating steps, grabbing my shoulders and securing me to him.

"Bella, please.." He whispered out disbelievingly, "Whatever you've done, it doesn't matter to me, we can get through it!"

"Edward, stop trying to make it better please!" I was shaking now as the sobs racked my body. "You don't understand. I don't **want** to get through it, that's what I'm trying to tell you…"

He jumped back from me as if I had shocked him with an electric current.

"Are you saying… I mean, are you… breaking up with me…?" He stuttered out, listening to the odd way the words sounded in that structure.

The emotions emanating from him were the lowest point of sadness I had ever felt. They crippled me and threw me to the ground in a pit of despair.

"Why?" He whispered out desperately, sinking to the ground next to me. "I love you so much, more than life, more than family, more than anything…"

He was sobbing now too as he groaned and cried out loudly with sadness.

"I'm sorry Bella, please, what ever I've done, I can change! Give me another chance please!!" He was sobbing so loudly that the trees around us actually shook with anguish. I knew the rest of the family would hear and I prayed to god that Jasper had already spoken to Carlisle.

Edward's body crumpled into a small ball as he clambered close to my lap, tearing at my clothes.

I moved away from him swiftly, because if he had any idea what the reason behind my decision was, he would want nothing to do with me.

"Bella, please!" He cried out, grabbing my waist and holding me close to him. "I need some sort of explanation, I can't forgive what I don't understand!"

"Edward.." I sobbed against his shoulder, "Please don't ask me that.."

He groaned and grabbed my chin forcefully, making me look at him.

"Tell me!" He growled, sobbing between the anger filled words.

I stared desperately into his grief stricken face. I couldn't have him ask me. The answer would destroy him **and** his relationship with Jasper.

"You don't want the answer.." I whimpered out frantically, desperate to change his mind.

"Like hell I don't!" He seethed angrily, tightening his grip on my shoulders.

I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head uselessly. I couldn't do it, I couldn't tell him.

"TELL ME!" He spat out heatedly, shaking my marble body and forcing me to open my eyes.

His face read like an angry child. It was stricken with a sadness worse than any I had ever seen, but it was also covered with a fine film of pure anger and frustration.

"Edward…" I cried futilely, "Stop it, you're hurting me.."

His grip would not cause me damage, but I needed him to listen and I hoped that the prospect of hurting me was enough to cause him alarm.

It wasn't.

If anything, his grip tightened and his eyes shone with pure determination as he forced his lips against mine and held my face to his.

"You …love …me!" He uttered out urgently, willing me to believe it. "Please.. You love me, I just need to make you see it!"

"Edward stop," He knew I was a newborn, that I could stop this with ease. But he kissed at my face relentlessly, tearing at my clothes.

His fevered movements turned to sloppy scrapes as he sobbed against my chest. He grabbed my hips and drove his pelvis against mine.

"You love me!" He cried with raw conviction, securing my body to his.

"Let her go Edward."

A moment passed before I recognized the voice. It was calm and controlled, but it sent a shiver of fear up my spine as Edward spun to face Jasper. I had begged him not to come here! I would let Edward kill me if it would prevent him hurting Jasper, I would give anything in the world to keep him safe.

Edward growled angrily and jumped from his offensive position to stand in front of Jasper.

"Jasper, leave! You have no idea what's going on…"

An instant of denial passed before Edward's face clouded with realization. The pieces finally fell together and Edward understood completely the reason behind my decision.

He turned to face me with an expression so pained that it actually cause me physical pain.

"My.. Brother?" He whispered out disbelievingly. "How could you Bella… My brother!"

A loud sob ripped from my throat and I started to apologize profusely, wanting more than anything for him to forgive me.

"Edward, please, I never planned for this… I just fell in love with him! I couldn't help it.. Please you have to understand!"

Jasper moved to comfort me but Edward intercepted quickly, pushing him away.

"DON'T TOUCH HER!" He screamed loudly, growling a deep, guttural sound that echoed icily through the forest.

For the first in over three years, I realized that I was scared of Edward. He was strong and could easily cause damage to Jasper.

Jasper put his hands in the air and retreated back slowly, sensing the delicacy of Edward's self control.

"Please Edward," Jasper begged softly, "Just don't hurt her.."

"Of course not…" Edward laughed out bitterly, "Because its not like she ever hurt me…"

He grabbed me by the wrist and hoisted me to my feet.

Jasper snarled, baring his teeth and hunching over dangerously on the ground.

"Never touch her like that again!" He growled, grabbing Edward by his throat and throwing him across the flat escarpment.

"Jasper Don't!" I screamed, jumping up to stand between the two of them. "This isn't right! I'm the one in the wrong here, don't take it out on Edward, please!"

"Save your defense for someone who cares!" Edward spat, climbing up behind me and locking his arms around my throat and squeezing the muscle tort.

I saw the fear cross Jasper's face as Edward tightened his grip around me.

"Edward, don't hurt her! You love her!" He begged, allowing a soft sob to escape his throat.

Edward huffed and laughed a low chuckle.

"A lot of god it did me, huh!?"

"Ed..ward… sto..p!" I choked out, thrashing against his restraints. I had always expected him to take it badly, but no part of me ever believed that he would hurt me in an attempt to win me back.

But maybe this was the opposite? Perhaps Edward's mentality was now geared towards destroying the thing he loved. If he couldn't have me, who said that anyone else could in his mind?

Jasper was torn between his desire to rip Edward from my body and to obey his commands to keep me safe.

Edward recognized the conflict in Jasper's eyes and snickered.

"Give me one good reason why she's worth saving, Jasper?" He asked laughing, but there seemed to be an underlining curiosity behind his words.

Was he actually contemplating killing me? I knew there was no way he could, but the mere possibility that he was considering it was enough to strike fear in my stomach.

Jasper looked hopelessly into Edward's face and sobbed softly, his body shaking with sadness.

"…Because I love her… That's why.."

A moment passed and none of us spoke. Jasper's eyes pleaded desperately for Edward to release me and I felt Edward's body exhale a large gust of air, before he dropped me the forest floor.

I gasped in fresh air, letting it run through my body and revitalize my clotted veins. The lack of breath made me uncomfortable and I wheezed in an attempt to regulate my breathing patterns.

Jasper rushed to help me and scooped me up into his arms, shuffling me away from Edward's space.

"Thank you, Edward." Jasper whispered softly, "I know that yo-"

"Don't." Edward said faintly, "Just… Don't…"

There was nothing else I could say. Nothing that would heal Edward's deep wounds. So I simply sat still in Jasper's arms and tried my best to offer silent support.

A few minutes passed and Edward was still standing immobile, not three meters away. I wasn't sure if I should leave but before I could decided on anything, Edward sighed loudly and without another word, disappeared between the trees.

I gasped and jumped quickly to follow after him, but Jasper grabbed my hand and held me back.

"Let him go…" He whispered, pulling me back to his lap. "He needs time…"

I nodded and said nothing further.

The entire situation was too eerie. It was the exact same feeling I had experienced in the forest this morning, right before I stepped into the sun. It was the feeling that I was living out certain aspects of Edward's life. First the sunshine and now the breakup in the forest.

It was two years ago that Edward had left me broken hearted in the Forks forest and now the situation had reversed. It wasn't my heart broken into pieces, but Edwards.

And as he ran further into the forest, stifling his troubles, I realized that I had no idea how to fix it…

**Ta-Da!**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	36. Healing Alice POV of chp 33

**Hello all! Read this A/N!**

**I am updating 2 chapters at once, aren't you lucky lol! But, this chapter is just an extra because; One- The previous chapter was depressing and I wanted to write something nice/sad/comforting haha. And two_-_ Because_ xtwilightx4xlyfx_**** wanted to know what happened with Alice and Michal in the forest, so this chapter is dedicated to you.**

**This chapter is from Alice's POV, and it happens during the chapters **_**Hide and Seek**_** and **_**First Light.**_** I'm not going to do any other chapters from other people's POV, because it's simply too hard to try and write from more than one persons mind lol!**

**So this is just a chapter to explain why they were nervous around each other. Please review this one as well as the subsequent chapter. Your feedback will help me determine what to do with their relationship.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 32/33 equivalent: Healing

(Alice POV)

"_Jasper and I will catch up soon. We're headed to Kenai National wildlife refuge, we'll follow your scent when we get there… just get to know Michal -I mean with the wild life!"_

"Okay…" I replied softly, a mixture of excitement and nervousness coloring my tone. I hadn't yet been alone with Michal and suddenly the opportunity seemed frightening and somewhat awkward.

Michal, however, seemed not bothered in the slightest. He smiled widely at me, extending a large hand and wiggling his fingers playfully. I linked my fingers threw his quickly, muttering my goodbyes to the others and running through the back door.

I didn't release Michal's hand while we were running, but instead, clung tighter to it as I watched him glide lithely through the night. His eyes were closed slightly and he cavorted through the dark forest gracefully, his hair whipping past his face in godlike waves. I let Michal lead, even though I had no idea where we were going. He kept changing direction, or spinning in opposite ways as if trying to avoid something. I didn't even realize I was staring at him until he popped one eye open and gazed at me humorously.

"Something on my face?" He asked laughing and leaping fluidly over a large crevasse.

I stared down, embarrassed, and Michal came to a sudden halt just beside me.

This wasn't like me at all… I was usually so sincere and upfront about everything. Why was I suddenly acting like a cutesy freshman, afraid to talk to the boy?

"You okay?" Michal asked earnestly, lifting my chin to look me in the eyes.

_He __**does**__ have beautiful eyes,_ my mind added quickly, making note of the deep color and liquid pattern.

"I'm great!" I replied, smiling and bouncing slightly on the spot in an attempt to reconnect with my quirky nature.

The falseness of the words must have been evident in my eyes, because he stared down intently into them as if analyzing my very soul.

"No your not.." He whispered simply, releasing my chin and taking my hand once more. "You want to talk about it?"

"There's nothing to talk about," I replied softly, mustering as much conviction as I could.

Michal said nothing further, but stared down disbelievingly at me.

"Okay…" He said slowly, "So you **didn't** just hear your husband and his lover screaming to the heavens in ecstasy?"

The wounds that I had been trying so desperately to ignore ripped open, surging through my body in a direct route of pain. I whimpered softly and held back the sobs that were threatening to release themselves.

"Alice…"

Michal's eyes held such a deepness to them that I felt like he was looking into my core, witnessing my emotions and attempting to heal them.

I stumbled back from his open arms. I didn't want to do this. I had cried all there was to cry out. Bella and Jasper were in love, it was something that I had to accept. I didn't want them feeling worse than they already did, I just wanted to push the feelings away and deal with them some other time. I couldn't cry in front of Michal, I wouldn't.

Well, that was the plan anyway. I took one look into his eyes and I fell forward into his open arms. He swung me into his lap and slumped against a thick pine tree, holding me against him tightly.

Why did he have to be so nice? Why couldn't he just let me be stubborn and forget all this!?

"Shhhh…." He whispered soothingly into my hair, running patterns with his fingers over my back.

I hadn't even realized that I was softly sobbing into his shoulder. Why was it that I seemed to lose all conscious awareness around him?

Even when my shaking stopped, Michal still held me against him, rocking us back and forth on the spot. This was a place I never wanted to leave. I felt whole and healed here in his arms, but how could that be? Was I not still crying over my lost love for Jasper?

A thought occurred to me then. Perhaps I was crying, not because of present sadness, but because I had suppressed so much that it had broken out at the seams, engulfing me in a pit of my own emotions.

I was suddenly very grateful that Michal had forced me to open up. Who knew how much longer I would have kept this wallowing up. If it had continued for much longer, I could have exploded in some fit of anger or jealousy, hurting my friends and family. A shiver ran up my spine at this revelation and Michal grasped me closer to him.

"Thank you.." I whispered out hoarsely, rubbing my face on his shoulder.

He chuckled lightly, leaning out to face me.

"I'm glad you finally opened up.."

I smiled gratefully and jumped off his lap, intent on starting anew.

"Come on," I said smiling, "There's something I want to show you.."

His expression changed to curiosity and he jumped up eagerly, ready for the next adventure.

I laughed at his child like spirit and couldn't help but notice that his shirt had ridden up, revealing a dazzling stomach and all too tempting hip bones.

"So, where to?" Michal asked excitedly, breaking me from my stupor of ogling.

It took me a few minutes to gather my thoughts from scenarios involving oils and lotions, but when I did, I made a quick note of our surroundings before dashing off heading east.

"Come on!" I said laughing and gesturing for him to follow.

Those two words were the only motivation he needed. He ran quickly towards me, dashing through the air with more poise than I had ever seen a newborn use.

He linked his arm through mine and we ran off towards a place I had visited only once before. It was a beautiful place and a strong part of me felt compelled to share it with Michal. I had discovered it on one of my first hunts around the area and I hadn't had the time to return to it since. I had, however, made note of the surroundings and bearings, so that I could find it again. I had intended to come here with Jasp-

I stopped that thought before I could take it any further. Why cause myself unnecessary pain?

We reached the location quicker than I had anticipated and I realized that I spent a lot of my time thinking when I was around Michal. It was odd.

I knew that we were there when I heard Michal take a huge gasp of air in, then release it slowly in a long awe.

There it was, a little patch of paradise. It was a small river that ran perpendicular to a cliff face before cascading down as a water fall. It was clear and luminous, and seemed to reflect the moonlight across thousands of little ripples, making the river appear to glow.

"You like it?" I asked nervously and shuffling my feet around on the spot.

"…A… ah.. I mean…"

I laughed at his apparent lack of words and bent down to splash a little of the water on him.

He smiled menacingly before sighing softly and smiling.

"This place is beautiful…" He whispered out in wonderment. "I mean, I thought the house was beautiful, but gosh! The house has got nothing on this place!"

"It's breathtaking.." I agreed happily. I was glad that I had shared this place with Michal. I suddenly felt compelled to show Jasper and Bella too. Maybe this could be a place of healing. A place where we could come just to relax and be us, without the complications, without the fear and hate.

"You're thinking on something hard," Michal interrupted me laughing, "May I ask-"

He stopped talking then and I understood exactly why. There was a herd of moose grazing nearby and a gust of wind had alerted us of their scent.

I watched as Michal noticeably stiffened and he closed his eyes, concentrating on the invigorating smell that was busy working through both his and my bodies.

I moved to creep closer to the herd and Michal did the same. He hunched down on all fours and crept forward slowly, like a lion ready to corner his prey.

They were grazing close to the river, some of them drinking to regain strength. I almost felt sorry for them, completely unaware of what was about to happen, but the predator inside me saw this as an opportunity and was ready to surround and slaughter them.

"Michal…" I hissed softly, gesturing for his to take the left side. He nodded appreciatively and stealthily shuffled over to the left, giving me room to the right.

I exchanged a fevered glance with Michal and counted to three, soft enough so that only we could hear the exchange of words.

"One… two… three!"

On three, we both leapt like animals from the shadows, landing at the foot of the river and snapping the beast's necks swiftly. I sunk my teeth to their throats roughly, devouring their life source rapidly, before moving on to another.

After I had successfully drained four of them, I leant back against the side of the stony river, satisfied.

Michal did not.

I watched him move from moose to moose, draining them quickly and yet somehow, not spilling a drop of blood. He moved with such precision and force that I found myself mesmerized by the skill and beauty of his actions.

The last of the heard let out a muffled groan as Michal sliced his teeth across its throat and drunk deeply.

_Okay, stop staring at him!_ My mind chided harshly, _It's a little weird that you find this whole thing such a turn on!_ I laughed to myself and skimmed my hand over the edge of the water, waiting for Michal to finish. He moved so quietly, that I didn't even realize he had moved until I saw his reflection standing over me in the river.

"Don't do that!" I squirmed anxiously, "You can't just creep up on people!"

He laughed and moved to sit down next to me. I noticed that both his and my hands were covered in fur and specks of blood, so I grabbed his with mine and leant down to wash them in the river.

The blood washed away elegantly, running down the warm stream like thin, wispy, red streamers in the wind. It was sort of beautiful, even if it was the blood of our victims.

"Thanks…" Michal whispered out faintly, bringing his hands out of the warm water and moving a stray hair behind my ear.

His hands were slightly warmer from the river, so I leaned into the touch, closing my eyes slightly.

I heard his breath hitch in his throat and I opened my eyes to find him staring intently at my lips.

I felt my own breath hitch then, as I involuntarily moistened my lips. He did the same, and I watched as his soft, pink tongue darted out to lick his lips, tempting me to kiss him.

Is this what I really wanted? It sure seemed like it as I leant down carefully, allowing my eyelids to flutter closed.

It felt like we were the only two people in the world. There was just me. There was just him.

"AAAAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

And apparently, there was just Bella.

My eyes flew open and my eyes searched the forest ahead where I had heard Bella's scream of fear. I watched as Michal did the same, jumping up from our close proximity and searching the forest paths.

_Dammit!_ My mind cried inwardly, _so close!_

So I guess I did want it then. This realization sent a shock of happiness through my body. I wanted to be kissed. I wanted to be kissed by Michal.

_Stupid Bella!_ My mind added softly.

But it didn't matter that Bella had interrupted anything before it could happen. All that mattered was that I had **wanted** to do it. I had wanted to kiss Michal.

I smiled blissfully to myself.

I was healing.

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	37. Aftermath

**Okay, so chapter no.2 for the day! **

**I hope you all enjoyed the previous Alice fluff lol!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 36: Aftermath

(Bella POV)

_It was two years ago that Edward had left me broken hearted in the Forks forest and now the situation had reversed. It wasn't my heart broken into pieces, but Edwards._

_And as he ran further into the forest, stifling his troubles, I realized that I had no idea how to fix it…_

"What have we done?" I uttered out hopelessly, wallowing in a pit of anguish.

"What we had do…" Jasper replied faintly, "There was no way we could have continued with a charade, keeping them in the dark like that.."

I agreed silently and pushed the issue no further. Jasper was right. As much as is it hurt now, as much as I wanted to hide my face and never return, it was better for the long run. How could we have continued to live like that? Always hiding our love from the world, kissing in the shadows, being careful to monitor our every gesture around each other.

And yet these thoughts didn't comfort me in the least.

I had broken Edward's heart… and I knew exactly how that felt.

"Did you tell Carlisle?" I asked quickly, remembering what a state the rest of the family would be in.

Jasper seemed to hesitate before answering, as if mulling something over.

"Yes…" He said slowly, drawing the word out and running his hands over my bare shoulders.

"But?" I asked skeptically, sensing the opposing proposition.

"…Well… I mean, he took it well its just.."

"Out with it Jasper!" I seethed angrily, "I'm fragile enough without you trying to covert something from me."

He cringed from the callousness of my words and I instantly felt terrible for snapping at him.

"Jasper, I'm… I'm sorry, I just-"

"Forget about it," He replied dismissively, though I noticed he completely stopped touching me.

_Great!_ My mind applauded my sarcastically, _Destroy your husbands heart and then have a go at your boyfriend! You know, the day's not over yet, you still have time to run over some kittens!_

I spun my head rapidly in an effort to rid myself of the internal voice. I was moody enough as it was without the help of my sardonic inner self.

"Jasper, I really am sorry.." I whispered, turning in his lap so that I could kiss his lips.

He smiled weakly and gave me a chaste peck in return. But that wasn't what I wanted, I grabbed his face roughly and melded it to my own. He was unresponsive for a moment, before returning my kiss with eager ferocity and running his hands up my back.

This is what I wanted. I wanted to forget. Forget in the same way that Jasper has when we'd told Alice. He seemed willing enough, so I slipped my hand between his body to pull at his jeans.

"Bella…" Jasper chided softly, "Not here, and most certainly not now…"

"Why?" I whined quietly, walking my fingers over the soft skin below his abdomen.

He shut his eyes tightly and I could see him fighting with his inner turmoil, deciding between what was right and what he wanted.

Ugh, I was so selfish sometimes!

I removed myself from Jaspers lap and, in doing so, removed the temptation to take things any further.

Jasper opened his eyes and nodded, appreciating the freedom to think clearly.

"Okay," I sighed softly, combing my hair back from it's casual disarray. "You were saying that Carlisle wanted someone, or something along those lines.."

"…Right," Jasper said slowly, clueing back into the conversation. "As I said, Carlisle **did** take it reasonably well…But…"

I waited quietly, not wishing to create any more distractions then there had been.

"But, he'd like to talk to the both of us.." Jasper continued, looking up cautiously to meet my eyes.

Carlisle wanted to speak with us, was he angry? Was he going to ask us to leave? Oh god! What if he asked us to leave?

"I don't know what he wants…" Jasper continued, answering my unspoken question. "I think he's just trying to understand how it happened."

"Well how are we suppose to answer that?" I asked hysterically, "I mean, **I** don't even know the answer to that!"

Jasper chuckled softly and grabbed me back into his lap.

"I think it all started with Twister," He said laughing. His laughter sounded like an angel's song, standing out from the glum, somber mood that had set in.

"It was long before that," I replied softly, wanting nothing more than to hear his laughter again. "For me it probably started the minute I woke up from three day hell. You were staring at me like I was the second coming… And I looked at you for the first time in my life and **really** saw you. I saw that you were beautiful."

"You stole the words right out of my mouth," He murmured, kissing me once more on the lips and dipping me backwards.

"That was nice…" I mumbled faintly.

"The kiss or the memories?" He asked smiling and I could hear the humor return to his voice.

"Both."

He nodded mutely next to me and began to hum into my hair.

"It was nice to remember the past for a moment." He whispered simply, "to pretend that we were still in it. But we're not. And right now we have families and responsibilities that we have to attend to…"

Why did he always have to be so right about everything? It was incredibly infuriating for both my mind and my self esteem…

"Come on then, filthy beautiful," He whispered softly, kissing at my ear lobe.

"If you don't want me to live in the past, why do you keep reminding me of it?" I asked in mock horror, furrowing my eyebrow in annoyance.

"Filthy beautiful is just a subtle reminder that I have always loved you… even in your darkest hour."

I gave a watery smile, I didn't want to cry again, even if this time would be out of happiness.

"Let's go talk to Carlisle.." I said sighing and reluctantly slipping myself from Jasper's embrace.

We walked back towards the house and my thoughts drifted to Edward.

Where had he gone? Had he gone to Denali to live with the others for a while? Would he ever be back, and if so, would he be able to be in the same room as me? Look at me?

A thousand unanswered questions rang through my mind at a constant rush. But through the many questions that I had been asking, there was only one that I really wanted answered.

Would Edward ever be home?

Time had passed quicker than I expected and before I knew it, we were already outside the patio area, stepping through the sliding doors.

The family had split their separate ways, each muttering to themselves in small groups, talking below my vampire senses.

Rosalie was the first person who noticed our entrance and shuffled over slowly to give me a supportive hug.

"Where's Edward?" She asked softly, concerned for her heart broken brother.

Everyone in the room seemed to look up at her question, all eager to hear the answer.

"…He… Uh, he didn't take it too well… He just sort of.. Ran off into the forest…"

Several different gasps echoed through the room, reverberating into utter silence.

Caterina Lucetta appeared to be the most concerned, she shuffled around anxiously, rubbing her hands over her arms and abrading the skin.

"It's okay," Alice said slowly, stilling Caterina's hands and holding them in her own. "Edward just needs time."

I wished I could be so sure.

"Bella?"

I turned around to find Carlisle staring at me intently. He looked tired and worn, even more so than before.

"Bella, Jasper could you come into my study please?"

I nodded mutely and moved stiffly to follow him up the stairs. Jasper grabbed my arms with his and directed me up towards the office.

"It'll be fine… everything will be fine…"

I repeated his words over and over in my head, willing myself to believe them. But the more I tried, the more they felt like false comfort.

If everything was going to be fine, why did I feel like I was walking towards me end?

If it was all okay, Why did I feel like I was walking into the wake of war?

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	38. Admonishing

**Thank you to all my reviewers as well as the anonymous ones! You guys got me to over 500 reviews, YAY.**

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_**P.S **__**Goldsparkler**_** there's a reference in here just for you, re: Principal's office haha!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 37: Admonishing

As each step brought me closer and closer to my demise, I realized that I had never actually visited Carlisle's room- let alone his study. I assumed that it would resemble his previous one fairly closely, but even amongst the anxiety fluttering in my stomach, a small part of me couldn't help but be excited at the prospect of seeing -yet another- beautiful room.

We moved through the darkened halls quickly, never stopping to take in the beauty and wonder of a different section of this castle. The house stretched out like a labyrinth, winding through different passages, passing hundreds of doors and I soon found myself losing track of exactly what position we were in the house.

"We're almost there," Jasper whispered slowly, sensing my confusion, "Carlisle's study is somewhat secluded… He likes privacy in regards to his work."

I mumbled my concurrence, vaguely wondering how it was that Jasper knew so much more about this house than I did. We'd lived here for the exact amount of time and yet somehow he seemed to know the levels and hallways incredibly well.

_He probably studies the house meticulously when you're not around,_ my mind rebuked cynically. _You know, just so that you have __**another**__ thing to think about…_

My mind, which had always been somewhat of a friend to me, was taking on the irritating habit of mocking me whenever it saw fit. Most times it was justified in it's ridiculing, but other times, it simply made me livid for the sake of it.

Too absorbed in my own thoughts, I bumped into a large, mahogany wooden door, not noticing that Jasper had stopped walking.

He snickered softly at my human Bella moment and I punched him roughly in the arm, causing his to wince and send me disapproving glare.

"Ah, I thought I heard a knock…" Carlisle mumbled softly, opening the large, smooth door and gesturing for us to step inside.

Jasper stepped in first, gliding through the open door in a manner that was almost too graceful considering the situation we were in. I muttered a polite thank you quickly, lumbering in awkwardly and avoiding Carlisle's eyes at all costs. I knew that if I looked up into their golden depths I would see the cold reflection of a father's thwarted gaze, staring disappointedly into my own guilty orbs.

Once inside the study, I noticed that it was, in fact, quite different from the one in Forks. It had a high, almost cathedral style roof, wide red walls that were covered in paintings and photographs and several built in bookshelves, all of which were empty due to several unpacked boxes on the floor.

"Well, uh, have a seat.." Carlisle spoke softly, brushing a hand through his already unkempt hair.

I shambled over towards two leather bound chairs, each facing directly opposite a large, dark wooden desk.

Jasper sat down next to me, grabbing my hand from my lap and holding it with his under the table. I could feel my breathing pick up as the familiar sense of panic washed over me once more.

"Shhh.." Jasper whispered softly, rubbing circles on my hand and working to lower the hysteria of my emotions.

I tried to focus on my breathing as Carlisle slumped down on the chair opposite us, holding his hands together on the table as if in prayer.

I couldn't help but feel like a naughty student that was being admonished in the principals office. Carlisle, of course, resembled no principal I had ever encountered, but he held the same presence and temperament of one; so authoritative, with a great deal of knowledge.

Carlisle let out a soft sigh before speaking in a very understatedly tone. "I suppose you both know why I called you up to speak to you.."

I exchanged a bewildered expression with Jasper before turning back to face Carlisle's somber appearance.

"Uh… Not really," I replied honestly, "I mean, I know it has something to do with Edward or something, but I don't really know what it is you want to say."

Carlisle's lips twitched at the mention of his first son. I couldn't imagine how he would feel right now with Edward missing and his family slowly tearing apart.

He sighed once more and leant back casually in his plush, leather chair.

"I didn't call you up here to speak about Edward… I asked you to come, so that I could speak about you."

"Me?" I asked incredulously, the terror and hysteria surging up again. Was he going to ask me to leave? He'd known Jasper so much longer, perhaps he didn't want to lose his son.

"The both of you," Carlisle corrected me, noticing the shear edge of panic in my voice.

I aimed to regulate my breathing again and gestured for Carlisle to continue, embarrassed from my little outburst.

He nodded slowly and tried directing the conversation a little more to Jasper.

"You have to understand, when Edward and I returned, we were under the impression that **we** were the ones with the big surprise."

"Caterina…" I answered softly.

"Yes," Carlisle nodded slowly. "We didn't know what any of you would say to us bringing her home, but we knew we couldn't leave her with the Volturi. She didn't want to hunt humans and they were basically forcing it upon her. If we hadn't offered to share with her our lifestyle I'm sure she would have been put to death."

I flinched away from the words, imagining someone as small and nimble as Caterina being massacred and burned.

"So of course Edward would have been more than shocked to find out that not only did you guys also invite someone to live with us, but that you had discovered a lonve between each other that far out shone previous ones.

Both Jasper and I nodded along, feeling the guilt set in.

"Look, as far as I know, love isn't something we plan for, it isn't even something we can control. Sometimes these things just happen for a reason and we may not understand them, but they mean more to us than we can ever explain.."

I nodded along to his discussion, not even really paying attention to the words. All that I understood was that Carlisle was trying to comfort us, he was acting kind. He understood the littlest of our relationship out of the entire family, yet he was willing to see the truth of it and try to understand.

"…However,"

_Or maybe not…_ My mind chided fearfully.

"…People in these situations get hurt." Carlisle continued, rubbing the dark circles under his eyes. "No matter how hard we try and prevent it, people will always end up heart broken and this is where I need your help…"

My breathing hitched in my throat, clotting into a tight little ball and preventing me from screaming out in fright.

"I think perhaps… it might be better if you left…"

I was dreaming. I had to be dreaming, because this couldn't be happening. How could he ask us to leave!? I'd given up everything I had to join this family, how could I leave it all behind now?

"You're asking us to leave?" Jasper whimpered out despairingly, allowing a soft sob to shatter through his throat.

Carlisle's face suddenly turned to sadness as he reached across the table to grab Jasper's shoulder.

"No, Jasper.. I don't mean-"

Jasper flinched away from Carlisle's touch, rocking his head in his hands.

What was I complaining about!? This had been Jasper's family for over five decades, it was his flickering light of hope in a hailstorm of hate and death. Jasper shouldn't have to leave!

"Bella, Jasper, listen to me-"

"No!" I shouted loudly, my voice reverberating through the dense, hollow walls.

"Jasper shouldn't have to leave!" I cried angrily, "I'll go! That'll fix everything, just let Jasper stay! I'll never come back, I'll never bother you again!"

At that moment, Alice burst through the door angrily, breaking the mahogany in two. Her eyes were livid with fury as her tiny body shook with the emotion.

"Carlisle, how can you ask them to leave!?" She cried desperately, chucking the splintered wood to the ground. "They're our family, we don't give up on family!"

"Please?" Jasper whimpered out desperately, his expression clouded by misery.

The conversation in the small study became a solid drone of noise as each of us fought desperately for asylum in the house.

"Enough!" Carlisle cried out loudly, silencing each of our arguments.

It was the first time I had ever heard Carlisle raise his voice and I cowered back from him, backing in to Alice.

His face softened when he saw that he had frightened me and he smiled regrettably, extending a hand of comfort.

"Do you all honestly believe that I would ask any members of my family to leave this coven?" He asked softly, as if hurt by our pleas of refuge.

"But you just asked us to leave?" Jasper asked confused, moving to stand with Alice and I.

"Not indefinitely.." He whispered apologetically. "I meant for a few days, three at the max! Just enough time to allow Edward to return home, without feeling threatened by your presence…"

I felt my posture and emotions relax at once. Carlisle didn't not want us in his family, he was just trying to look out for Edward and ensure that he could return home into a comfortable atmosphere.

Jasper's emotions seemed to mirror my own as he lurched forward towards Carlisle and sobbed into his shoulder.

"I… thought you.. Were saying that …you didn't want me as your son anymore.." He mumbled out between raspy intakes of air.

Carlisle hugged his son comfortingly and held him until his body stopped shaking with sadness. I had never noticed before, what a strong bond Jasper and Carlisle had. Jasper truly thought of Carlisle as his one and only father, and it pained him deeply to think that his father no longer wanted him.

After several minutes, they eventually broke apart and Jasper punched in the shoulder softly, as if to reaffirm his masculinity.

Carlisle laughed at the action and ruffled Jaspers hair, returning the act of manliness.

"Honestly you three," Carlisle chided softly, "Do you think I would ask any of my children to leave? I love you all equally, but this is just something I need you two do for me."

I nodded earnestly and grabbed Carlisle into a gut wrenching hug.

"Sorry for overreacting dad," I apologized, mumbling the words into his cardigan.

He kissed my forehead softly and chuckled.

"You reacted the way I would have expected you to, that is, if I was **actually** asking you to leave."

I looked up and smiled thankfully at him, for which I received another kiss on my head.

"I am happy for the two of you, but this is about Edward. He needs my support now and I need to give it to him. You two have each other now, but Edward has no one, I just think if you went away for a couple of days-"

"Of course Carlisle," Jasper interrupted him, taking my hand. "We'll stay in the lodge at Denali for a while, just until we hear from you.."

Carlisle nodded appreciatively and began searching through his desk draws for something. He rummaged through hundreds of documents before pulling out a bowl of keys.

"You have a cabin in Denali?" I asked slowly, curious as to why I had never heard of it.

"Well it's more Carlisle and Esme's cabin." Jasper replied awkwardly, "It's sort of their.. Uh.. Romantic getaway…"

Carlisle snickered softly as he picked out a long, sterling silver key.

"I want to go too…"

We all turned around to find Alice staring intently at the silver key.

Carlisle seemed hesitant to answer as he fumbled with the thin, shiny key.

"I don't know Alice…" He replied cautiously, "I don't want Edward to think we're picking sides or anything-"

"Oh come on Carlisle," Alice interrupted frustratingly, "Do you honestly think Edward is going to see me as a friend in all this?"

Carlisle stared at her confused, unclear of where she was taking this.

"He'll be counting on my anger!" She continued, throwing her hands in the air. "He'll think of me as an enemy rather than a friend. The enemy that forgave Bella and Jasper too quickly. He'll think that I've taken the entire situation too lightly."

"That's true Carlisle," Jasper added quickly. "Don't you think he might be angry at Alice for forgiving us so quickly?"

Carlisle seemed torn between the decision. He didn't want to make Alice uncomfortable by forcing her to stay, but he didn't want Edward to think we were picking and choosing our allies.

"It's only for a couple of days," Alice pleaded quietly, pulling her best doe-eyed expression.

"Three days maximum," Carlisle agreed, dropping the key in Jasper's open hand. "You can return home as soon as I call!" He added loudly, strongly emphasizing the '**as soon'** segment. Clearly Carlisle didn't want us gone for too long either.

I nodded as Jasper and Alice began to file orderly out of the small room.

"You're leaving now then?" Carlisle asked, moving to stand next to me.

"I think it's best dad," Jasper replied softly, "We'll just grab some clothing and then head out. After all, Edward could come back any minute."

"We'll take my car," Alice said happily, overjoyed at the possibility of being able to drive her favorite yellow Porsche.

"Uh, Alice… as much as I too love your passion for your car, perhaps it would more inconspicuous if you were to take my Mercedes?"

Alice begrudgingly agreed and caught the key agilely as Carlisle chucked it to her.

She left the room in a huff then, mumbling something unintelligible as Jasper tried to sooth her emotions.

I turned to follow them but paused briefly and spun back to face Carlisle.

"When Edward comes back… Just.. Just tell him I'm sorry," I whispered softly, holding back the sob that was fighting for release.

"Of course," Carlisle replied softly, "Just be safe, okay?"

I nodded with a weak smile and left the room.

"Jasper and I will get some supplies," Alice said softly when I'd rejoined them at the stair case. "Can you just tell the others that we'll be going?"

I nodded mutely and moved to walk down the stairs.

"I love you," Jasper whispered softly, blowing me a kiss.

"Till the end of time," I replied, standing on my tiptoes to kiss him softly. "Try and get Alice to pack me in at least one suitable outfit please?"

He laughed softly and nodded his head before retreating up the stairs to our room.

I moved down the stairs slowly, dragging my feet across each step.

Is this what it had come to? Hiding in an Alaskan cabin because Edward wouldn't be able to stand being in the same house as me?

"Bella sweetie!" Esme cooed softly, "Are you okay?"

"Yes, thank you mum," I replied softly, hugging her tightly. "But I need to speak to everyone for a minute. Where's Emmett and Michal?"

I noticed that they weren't huddled around the coffee table with the others. I didn't remember them being here when I first came back from the forest either and I wondered what they could possibly be doing?

"Emmett was pretty down because of everything," Esme sighed softly. "Michal was really sweet, he offered to go for a quick hunt with him, even though he'd just been."

I smiled to myself, that was Michal. Offering to help others even if it inconvenienced himself.

"Well, I guess you'll just have to tell them later." I said quietly, sitting down on the cream, smooth couch.

"Are you sure? I mean, they'll be back any minute…" Esme offered supportively.

I smiled thankfully, "Yes I know, but Edward might be too."

Esme's face colored with realization and she didn't press the issue.

"You're leaving," She said softy. It wasn't a question, it was a statement. She was a mother and mothers were always intuitive.

I took her hand in mine and squeezed it tightly.

"Just for a few days, just to give some Edward some space…"

She nodded slowly, but her emotions were noticeably down.

"I'll miss you," She said earnestly, resting her head on my shoulder.

"And I'll miss you," I replied, putting an arm over her small body. "But this is something that we have to do for Edward. If we want any sort of future-"

"I understand completely." She silenced me, rubbing a hand on my arm. "I'll tell the others, you don't have to worry…"

"Thank …you" I whispered out between a sob.

What if we could never be a family again? I wanted some much to believe that we could, but a strong part of me told me that things couldn't go back and for the first time in days my mind said nothing, it was silent.

Rosalie came and sat on the other side of my, combing her fingers through my hair.

"Promise me something sister," She whispered softly, releasing the full extent of her eyes upon me.

"Anything," I replied hoarsely.

"Promise me you'll come back…"

I didn't answer her, I just swept her into my arms and hugged her.

"Of course I'll come back!" I replied sternly, "How can you even ask me that?"

She smiled coyly and kissed both my cheeks.

I noticed Caterina was moving somewhat slowly and uncomfortably towards me.

"You're leaving?" She asked meekly and I was surprised to find that this fact made her sad.

"Just for a few days," I smiled reassuringly. "Can you do me a favor Caterina?"

Her eyes widened noticeably and she nodded quickly, taken back by my direct questions.

"Look after him…"

Her eyes softened and she nodded, giving me a sort of half man hug.

"Ready?" Jasper asked, appearing at the edge of the stairs with Alice who was laden down with at least large suitcases.

I nodded and moved to take some of the luggage to the car while Jasper and Alice said their goodbyes.

The Mercedes was still parked abstractly in the front, pulled to an odd angle over the smooth white pebbles. I popped the car boot open and slipped the 3 suitcases in with almost no struggle.

After a few minutes, Jasper and Alice lumbered out the front door looking weary from their goodbyes.

"Let's roll," I said smiling and trying to appear cheerful.

I slipped into the front passenger seat and Jasper took the drivers seat. Alice seemed to take the longest getting into the car, she kept looking around the surrounding woods as if expecting something to jump out.

I realized with horror that Alice had not been able to say goodbye to Michal. I wondered what Michal would think when he returned home and we weren't there. Would he be upset that we hadn't said goodbye, or more so that Alice had just disappeared?

Alice slumped into the car roughly and stared absent mindedly out the window.

"You okay, Al?" I asked softly, trying to manipulate her emotions so that she wasn't so sad.

She sighed and forced a small smile on her face.

"I'm fine," she said softly.

I turned back to Jasper and watched as he gave me a pain stricken expression. He wanted Alice to be happy more than anyone. He still believed he was the sole reason behind her pain.

As the car drove smoothly over the glossy, white pebbles an odd feeling of home sickness set over me. I had never not had a place to call home and now I was leaving the one place that I felt I truly belonged.

We finally reached the road at the end of the driveway and the back door of the Mercedes was wrenched open as a white blur jumped into the back seat.

"Thought you could leave without me?" Michal asked laughing and shaking the wet from his hair.

Alice's emotions jumped through the roof and I gripped the leather beneath me in an effort to stay in my chair.

"You came!" She squealed with joy, throwing her arms around him with eager ferocity.

All too soon she realized how enthusiastically she had behaved and she sunk back from him, smiling shyly.

"It's nice to see you too!" Michal said laughing and throwing and arm over her shoulder. "I mean, did you guys honestly think you could just leave without taking me with you?"

"Well, that was the plan!" Jasper joked, snickering and receiving a swat over the head form Michal. "But seriously Michal, this isn't like a fun getaway for four, we're doing this to give Edward some space."

"That's fine," Michal said smiling, "But it doesn't mean we can't have some fun? Or is this a trip where you're suppose to chastise and punish yourself for sins?"

I snorted at him and threw the car's directory book at him, laughing.

The car slipped onto the highway effortlessly and slid past the other cars like a shadow, diving between lanes but never coming close to touching another car.

"It's going to be okay.." Jasper soothed softly, taking my hand in his.

I nodded along softly. I wasn't sure if it was the atmosphere of Alice's emotions, or maybe if it was just the company. But for the first time in a long time...

I believed him.

**This was suppose to be just a quick 6 page chapter and it turned into a 16 page chapter lol! **

**Some of you are probably going to be angry that they're acting a little aloof, but this story is slowly turning into angst category and I REALLY don't want it to!**

**Not sure if I can update tomorrow. Probably, but maybe not.**

**Reviews help!**

**P.S- I like this series and I'd love to continue, but I'm stuck for ideas for sequels. If you have ANY ideas, even if you think it's crap, I'd love to hear them. So PM me or leave it in a review. I will appreciate it sooo much. But just so you know, I won't be able to use all of your ideas... obviously lol! Just don't feel upset if I can't use them.**

**Thank you :)**

**x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x**


	39. Road Trip

**I'm back…**

**Quick thank you to my anonymous reviewers; **_**Emmetismylife**_**,**_** iceblufox**_** and **_**Jeanette**_** because I can't thank them the way I do the others!**

**But I love you all… Hahaha!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 38: Road Trip

I didn't expect to feel like this.

I thought I was meant to be atoning for my sins, stewing in my own guilt ridden pit. I should have been mulling over what a terrible person I was and thinking about what poor Edward was dealing with right now.

So why did I feel like this?

"Okay, okay! So, I spy with my little eye, something-"

"Enough, Michal!" I interrupted him laughing, "We've been playing for a hour now! Alice **always** sees what the answer is."

"Yeah, but If you'd just put the barrier up…" He began optimistically.

I turned around and started beating him roughly in the chest, hoping that the gesture would be enough to finally silence his child-like banter.

The car ride had progressed much the same way since we'd left Seldovia. Michal would come up with a ridiculous car game to play and Alice would glimpse into the future and come up with the answer straight away. Then Michal would beg me to use my power to protect him from the intrusion and Alice would pound on him ruthlessly until he gave up. It was a merry circle of life that seemed to continue relentlessly, despite mine and Jasper's futile attempts to bring clarity to either of them.

Truthfully, a part of me squealed in delight each time Alice and Michal squabbled or wrestled. As hard as they tried to appear aloof and indifferent to the casual touches and strokes, I could feel the emotions prick to the height of happiness each time Alice brushed his leg or Michal stroked her face.

Jasper was not exempt from the drastic change in the atmosphere either. I watched him squirm or twitch in delight as the dense fog of happiness tugged at his mind and heart. He knew that there was something deeper than the child like name calling and punching, and he took delight in Alice's euphoria, constantly baiting them more and spurring the actions on.

I wondered vaguely weather they had any idea that we were still watching them. Watching their gestures and movement. Watching for the glances and smiles they threw each other. I realized that any one who could view us from an outer perspective would think Jasper and I freaks. In some respects that was true, but in others it couldn't have been further from the truth.

Were we freaks for wanting our family to be happy?

I certainly didn't think so.

"So what do you say Bells?" Michal asked happily, breaking me from my thick daze.

I glanced briefly at Jasper and noticed that he was smirking softly, attempting to look thoroughly concentrated on his driving.

"What do I say about what?" I replied, ignoring Jasper's obvious amusement.

"About swimming?!" He sighed incredulously, leaning back into Alice's shoulder. "Have you not been listening for the last ten minutes?"

"Not really, no." I retorted grinning and blowing him a quick kiss.

"Hey!" Jasper cried in mock horror, grabbing my hand in his. "You can't just give your kisses away like that. They are for me and for me only."

I laughed at him softly before miming the action of locking my lips and handing him the key. It was unlike Jasper to get jealous over such a small gesture, but I felt the justification for his hurt was more for Alice's benefit that it was for his own.

He nodded in approval and brought my hand to his lips, kissing each of my finger tips before finally, the palm of my hand.

"So swimming, yes?" Michal asked enthusiastically, breaking our small bubble of romance.

"It's like zero degrees up here!" I replied in an appalled tone, turning to face him in the chair.

"So? That doesn't bother us!" He said dismissively, as if he had already planned our entire time out.

"Well I don't have my swimming costume and no, before you ask, I am **not** going skinny dipping in the ice water…"

Jasper turned to look at me, raising his eyebrows and allowing his eyes to rake down my body suggestively. Clearly **he** was intrigued by the idea of a late night swim.

"Oh she'll go," Alice said supportively, lying casually across Michal's lap and staring out the window.

I didn't reply to Alice's comment. There was no point in trying to argue with a woman that could see the path of the future.

"Shouldn't this be over now?" I asked impatiently to no one in particular. I could feel the excitement bubbling over inside me, running through my veins like adrenaline and making me twist uncomfortably in my seat.

"Geeze Bella," Alice chuckled softly, "We've been on way longer car trips than this before. How did you cope then?"

"I slept!" I countered laughing and ruffling her hair gently. "But I suppose none of you will remember any of that!"

"I do!" Michal answered fervently. "Thinking back on it, I really took it for granted…"

I sighed in agreement and let the dim human memories wash over me. I remembered the feeling of a warm, plush bed, welcoming me after a tiresome day. The way my mind hovered on the brink of awareness before falling into deep slumbers. I had taken it for granted too. I had just assumed that I would appreciate the extra hours of consciousness when I was a vampire, but in actual fact, sleep was one of the things that I missed most about my short human life. It was so calming and rejuvenating, and it always promised new things for the morning.

And now, I would never rest again.

"You okay?" Jasper asked softly, while Alice and Michal continued to banter about the human aspects of life.

I nodded softly, leaning my head on his shoulder and inhaling his heady scent.

"Just a little nostalgic…" I replied faintly, tracing patterns over his jeans and pockets.

I heard his take in a sharp breath of air as my hands moved closer to his hips.

I laughed softly to myself.

"Still got it…"

Ten more minutes of comfortable silence passed, while the car bounced and jerked over the rocky landscape. Perhaps the Mercedes was not the best idea for an outback adventure, no matter how inconspicuous.

"AAaahh! There it is!" Alice cried excitedly, bouncing up and down across the leather upholstery.

My head whipped around so quickly that I was sure, had I been human, my neck may have snapped right off.

At first I saw nothing where Alice had so rigidly been pointing, but as the car drew further into the rugged terrain, I spotted a quaint, wooden cabin, nestled beneath hundreds of pine trees.

It was the sweetest house I had ever seen. It was made entirely of rich brown mahogany wood, which seems to blend right into the exquisite nature surrounding it. The small a-frame roof had a large window that overlooked onto a dazzling lake, stretched out majestically before us.

I realized that Michal's expression mirrored my own perfectly. His jaw seemed to had lost all composure and rigidness, dropped almost as low as his collar bone. His nose was pressed tightly against the frosty, dark windows of the Mercedes, and his breath made soft, foggy patterns across the glass.

"Wow…" He breathed out slowly, completely mesmerized by the small lodge.

"You like?" Jasper asked shyly, glancing up from beneath his eyelashes like a timid child.

"I love," I replied softly, taking his head between my hands and kissing him gently. "One question though!" I said quickly, releasing his lips from mine. "When you say 'Esme and Carlisle's getaway' I assume it is a lodging that is kept thoroughly clean."

He stared at me in complete bewilderment, entirely unaware of what I was trying to hint at.

"So in other words…" I murmured out faintly, utterly embarrassed at the subject content I was discussing. "The sheets and everything are good and clean?"

Jasper and Alice burst out laughing at my little inquiry, clutching at their midsections and gasping for breath.

"God I hope so!" Jasper replied chuckling and leaning in to kiss my once more on the lips. "I don't think Esme is one to leave things unattended."

"Okay!" Alice said abruptly, ending the discussion. "Let's stop talking about our parents and the risky escapades they get up to at their weekend lodge."

I nodded vigorously and slipped quickly from the car, eager to see the, no doubt, equally beautiful interior of the house.

Jasper came up behind me and slipped his arms around my waist, securing me to him.

"I know the circumstances could be better, but I truly am glad that we have this time together…"

I spun around to link my arms around his neck and leaned into his chest.

"We have every bit of eternity together, this is just a nice little 'mini break,'" I replied softly, kissing soft grazes over his neck. "Let's just make the most with every moment we have, agreed?"

He chuckled into my hair and inhaled the scent.

"Agreed."

As we stood together in silence, the events of the week flashed through my mind in a haze of speed and ambiguity.

We had left our family to come here. We had run away from the only place I'd ever felt whole and home. Edward had disappeared somewhere and I had no idea how he was or if I'd ever see him again. But despite all of this, despite everything and every obstacle that had been thrown at me in the last week, a familiar emotion bubbled through my body and swept through my skin. It was all I could feel now and all that I wanted to feel ever. There were no interrupting feelings, no anger or fear.

There was just love.

**I** was loved.

**I know this is short and incredibly corny.**

**I am SO tired that I can't even explain it. Also, I hate school so much right now that its indescribable. But lets just say that if school were a person, I'd shoot them in the kneecaps! **

**Well, review! Hahaha!**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	40. Attraction

**Thank you very much for all your reviews, they were very kind.**

**Just a quick note. Most of you seem to understand it, but a few of you were just a little confused. In chapter 35, with the whole 'Edward hurting Bella' thing, he couldn't actually kill her. Hence the line _"_**_**Was he actually contemplating killing me?****I knew there was no way he could, but the mere possibility that he was considering it was enough to strike fear in my stomach."**_

**So Bella knew that he couldn't kill her by strangling her, but the prospect of him considering hurting her was frightening. **

**Okay, Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

Chapter 39: Attraction

Three days of peace. Three days of not having to worry about how to act, how to move or what to say.

I stretched out on the large, plush couch and Jasper pulled me closer to him, resting his chin on my shoulder. The credits of the movie we had been watching rolled onto the screen slowly, scattering small wisps of light across the darkened room.

"Well…" I sighed loudly, nestling into the crook of Jasper's neck. "That was… worthwhile.."

Jasper snorted behind me, muffling his laughter into my skin.

"Yes, well in any case…" He mumbled softly, stroking my skin. "It's probably a good thing that time is on our side."

Michal burst out laughing and Alice cringed awkwardly, being the one responsible for inflicting the torment on us.

"It was rather terrible, wasn't it?" She asked awkwardly, leaning back into Michal.

After inspecting the dazzling interior of the lodge, Alice had decided that it might be fun if we watched a movie; considering it was two in the morning and no one felt like swimming- much to Michal's dismay. Since the only DVD's in the house were outdated and surprisingly horrific, Alice thought it would be funny if we watched a vampire-horror flick. I had suffered silently through the first half of the movie, but the faux fangs and mutated faces of the foes had proven too much for my liking, so I had spent the remainder of the movie fantasizing about Jasper.

"Okay," Michal said excitedly, hopping up from the couch and dragging Alice with him. "That movie successfully wasted about two hours, what do we say to swimming now?"

"It's four a.m!" I cried in horror, spinning in Jasper's arms to face away from him.

"Oh come **on** Bella," He whined softly, "You saw how cool the lake was! We might even be able to find some rocky caves or something."

"Yes and then maybe we'll find some hidden treasure.." I added sarcastically.

A moment of silence passed before I was wrenched painfully from Jasper's embrace and thrown on my feet.

I felt odd without the contact of Jasper's skin on mine, so I scrambled back from the intruders arms in an attempt to squirm back into my embrace.

"Oh no you don't!" Alice said laughing and linking her arms around my waist. "Come on, you know it'll be fun."

I realized I had two decisions. I could go along with their idea and muck around in the ice water, or I could take a run for it now and attempt to hide from three incredibly skilled vampires.

"Can I just tell you what you decide?" Alice asked impatiently, turning me so that she could stare me straight in the face.

I sighed softly and squirmed out of her arms, "No need, I'll come with you. But Esme better keep bathers here because I am **not** going nude!" I said sternly, moving towards the closets so that I could search for anything feasible.

Jasper chuckled softly, slipping from the couch and dragging me towards the stairs. "Darling, Alice had packed in your things.." He whispered softly, opening the door to the guest room. "You don't actually think we'd force you to swim naked… No matter how much I would approve."

I laughed quietly when he shut the door quickly, turning so that we were barley a foot apart.

"Eager for some privacy?" I asked haughtily, wrapping my arms around the back of his neck.

"I'm sorry," He whispered softly, a smile playing behind his words. "But all that lust that was pouring of you during the second half of that film is enough to mess with anyone's mind."

"Ha-ha…" I replied stiffly, leaning up on my tiptoes to kiss him softly on the lips. "It's not my fault that the movie was so dull that I was forced to fantasize about you."

He smiled smugly and ran a hand through my hair disheveled hair.

"Well you know," He whispered seductively, breathing softly against my face. "We've got some time now. Perhaps we could turn those fantasies into rea-"

"Not now!" Michal interrupted Jasper, banging loudly on the door. "Me and Alice wanna see the caves, so get dressed now and then you can canoodle later!"

Jasper growled softly and bent down to kiss me once more on the lips. I laughed against his mouth and snaked my fingers up his shirt, caressing the smooth skin.

I felt him smirk against my lips before I peeled the shirt from his body.

"But Bella!" He asked in mock disapproval, "Michal said that there was to be no 'canoodling' of any sort."

"I don't see any canoodling," I replied incredulously, mustering up the best expression of innocence I could achieve. "I'm simply helping you undress so that we might get changed quicker."

He laughed softly once more, helping me undo his belt buckle and slipping of his jeans, throwing them towards the bed.

"I suppose I should extend the same favor to you then," He whispered faintly, fumbling with the buttons of my shirt.

Ordinarily, I may have simply ripped my shirt in two, impatient for the feeling of Jasper's soft hands. But as sex was not the intention of our mini escapade, I saw no harm in allowing Jasper to continue with his torturously slow hands.

He finally finished unbuttoning the shirt and proceeded to fold it deliberately, smoothening out the creases before placing it neatly on a chair.

"Quite done, are we?" I asked impatiently, folding my arms across my bare chest.

He took a long, thorough stare across my body before throwing me into his arms and kissing me deeply.

When he had thoroughly drained me of all my unnecessary breath, he released me and handed me a deep green bikini top. I took one look at the item of clothing, before stretching it about between my fingers and staring at Jasper skeptically.

"What is this, minty dental floss?" I asked disbelievingly, miming out the action of flossing my teeth.

"Alice says this style is really making a come back," He replied facing away from me, though I could hear the smile in his voice. "I must say, I'm quite looking forward to this change in fashion."

I huffed and mumbled something incoherent before tying the thin top around me, stretching the fabric for all that it was worth.

I watched as Jasper dropped the rest of his clothing and pulled on his swimmers, tempting me with his unreasonably slow pace. I contemplated taking a quick photo of his behind and printing it as a keepsake. After all, a body that delicious deserved to be framed and hung up- an art work that surely all would admire. But it ended all to soon and I was left staring like at idiot, not even bothering to close my open jaw.

Jasper spun around slowly, holding up an equally stringy pair of green bikini bottoms and smiling.

"The Pièce de résistance!" He said triumphantly, sinking to his knees in front of me. I felt the button of my jeans pop open, followed by an unusually loud fly opening. The teeth of the zipper dragged down slowly, clicking away loudly in time with my breathing. Jasper's hands linked around towards my backside as he dug his hands into the pockets and pulled the jeans down, kissing each bit of new skin that was uncovered. By the time the jeans were at my ankles I was already breathing embarrassingly loud- and I still had my underwear on.

"Almost there…" He whispered softly, twisting the fabric of my underwear around his thumbs and pulling them off in one quick rip.

"So close," I mumbled faintly, surprised that I still had the ability to speak.

"So close to what?" Jasper asked quietly, kissing a trail of fiery kisses from my ankle upwards as he slipped the stringy bathers on.

"Well," I said a little more clearly, some of my composure returning, now that I wasn't completely naked. "I was going to say that we almost made it without ripping one article of clothing."

He chuckled lightly against my skin before standing up right to rake my body with his eyes.

"Yes," He sighed approvingly, "I am **really** looking forward to this fashion."

"Why Mr. Whitlock!" I asked astounded, "Were you planning on checking out all the girls when this fashion finally rolls in?"

"**One** girl," He corrected me quietly, "And I happen to believe that she looks gorgeous in absolutely anything."

"You're not so bad yourself," I said calmly, in a seemingly disinterested tone.

He laughed again, before grabbing me in his arms and opening the door. I could hear the gentle hum of the television downstairs and I prayed to god that Alice hadn't put on another cheesy horror film.

"Can you believe they have a play station here?" Michal asked in astonishment, throwing down the controller to come and join Jasper and I at the door.

"I think it's Emmett's," Jasper replied laughing and pulling me closer.

"Well, well Bella," Michal said approvingly, "you look lovely."

I shone visibly at his compliment and proceeded to praise his own swimming attire, only glancing briefly to stare at his body.

"Oh and Jasper," Michal whispered, winking. "You're not so bad yourself."

Jasper chuckled, ducking his head in embarrassment. "That seems to be a common opinion around here."

"Aw," I said sympathetically, wrapping my arms around his waist. "You're more attractive than all of us combined."

"Even me?"

All three of us turned around to the sound of Alice's high soprano voice. She was standing at the stairs like a summer model, sporting an adorable yellow bikini that was strung in much the same fashion as mine was.

Michal's voice caught in a knot as Alice walked down the stairs slowly, drawing out the inevitable climax that would occur.

"A..Al..ice," Michal stuttered out slowly, "You look.. I mean, absolutely.." He didn't even finish the sentence, he just gushed out a large amount of breath and stared at her, wide eyed.

"Thank you," She whispered softly, fiddling her fingers together awkwardly and glancing up once or twice to meet Michal's equally shy eyes.

I tried to alleviate the situation by pushing some calm into the air, but Jasper grabbed my hand in his, shaking his head slowly.

"Okay!" I said clapping my hands together and gesturing for us to move. "Michal, you wanted to swim so badly, so lets get going!"

"What? Oh yes, okay… lets go," Michal replied, struggling to tear his eyes from Alice.

I saw Jasper smile at their apparent attraction, before he swung me into his arms, running bridal style from the house.

"I thought we could give them some space," He whispered softly, trying not to alert them of our plans.

I spun myself in his arms so that I could secure my legs together behind his back. I heard him groan inwardly when I 'accidentally' grinded against him, moving his hips suddenly. I chuckled softly, kissing soft marks across his chest and upper neck.

"I love you, you know that?" I asked quietly.

"Yes," He replied, kissing my forehead. "And I'm fond of you too…"

I laughed against him and wound my fingers tighter into his hair, bringing his lips to mine. I kissed his deeply, meeting his tongue in a battle of dominance.

I knew we'd reached the water when small drops of warm water splattered over my lower body. I released Jasper's lips from mine and dropped into the lake. There were small, thin wisps of ice at the edge of he water and I realized that the temperature would have been freezing to a human, but thankfully, was lukewarm to me.

"Happy you came now?" Jasper asked shyly, squeezing my hand slightly.

"Well, it's no cheesy horror flick," I quipped back, smiling sweetly to make sure I was forgiven.

He laughed loudly at me and then, without warning, held me in his grip and slipped beneath the surface.

**Same time tomorrow? **

**Reviews are just lovely…**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	41. Beneath the Surface

**Right on time?**

**Okay, I've decided I'm going to try and finish this story in 50 - 60 chapters, hopefully 50! But I most likely WILL do a sequel, which means I'm probably going to end this story on a climax or something cliff-hangery…**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 40: Beneath the Surface

I was drowning.

The water flooded rapidly through my lungs, seeking out the dry spots and thoroughly flooding them- disabling my breath. I could feel my senses shutting down like switchboards as I began to lose a sense of where I was, first my smell and then my speech. All these things told me that I **should** be drowning…

And yet I wasn't.

I drifted loosely through the small currents and watched as the inhabitants of the lake scurried from my intruding form, retreating into banks of seaweed and rock clusters.

I gazed hopelessly as Jasper floated gracefully through the still water, his golden hair swirling lightly around his perfect face. He looked so tranquil in the calm water that I was suddenly envious that I could never appear so carefree and serene.

As quickly as the emotion of jealousy had come, it was dismissed to be replaced by love. At first I wasn't sure exactly what had happened, until I noticed that Jasper was no longer floating fluently in front of me. I spun around hastily in an effort to find him once more. Lately, I found that I was almost incapable of being without Jasper for longer of a few minutes.

I felt a solid grip grab my waist, pulling me towards the bottom of the lake and tickling me as I struggled to squirm free out from the imposing grasp. I landed on the soft bank with nothing more than a gentle push, and unlike my human body, this body stayed firmly set; avoiding floating to the surface.

Before I could protest to his absence, Jasper thrashed through the water rapidly, securing his body to mine and kissing me deeply on the lips. I was a little shocked by the sudden spontaneous change in actions, but I kissed him back just as eagerly, wrapping my hands through his untamed hair and holding him closer to me.

This was weird.

It was a type of communication that I wasn't at all use to, no words or speech. Everything was expressed through actions, or in mine and Jasper's situation- emotions. I could feel the love and happiness radiating between us strongly, making me giddy and incredibly impressionable.

When he finally released my lips from his, I was smiling ear to ear like a frivolous school girl, finally having received the kiss from the boy of her dreams. I watched as his face lit up, obviously pleased with the affect he was having on me.

A dull sound resonated through the still water, alerting both Jasper and I to someone else's presence. I turned my head sharply to see Michal and Alice laughing playfully at the other end of the lake. Their laughs were nothing more than large jets of bubbles, flowing effortlessly from their mouths and hiding their happy faces behind large gushes of water. Their air ran out quickly though, and they were left silently shaking in the distance.

I grabbed Jasper's hand in mine and began to swim quickly towards the others, thrashing wildly through the still water. I had never been an adequate swimmer in my human life and though I was stronger and faster now, the patterns and styles of swimming were still a mystery to me.

Alice waved happily when she noticed our arrival, grabbing Michal's hand in hers to come and meet us. My emotions lifted noticeably higher as Michal's soared from the contact of Alice's skin.

Without the aid of speaking, I tried to communicate as best I could that we should go up. The lake was rather deep and I found it disorienting, not being able to tell what time of day it was. I pointed wildly upwards until the point where I looked like a crazy mute- unable to truly correspond with others.

Jasper snickered behind me, pushing off from the ground and kicking up towards the surface. When I broke the water surface, I was oddly perplexed and dazed, not accustomed to having a large amount of air in my lungs. I spluttered and coughed the remains of the water violently, shaking the sand and debris from my hair in the process.

"You okay?" Jasper asked concernedly, wrapping his arms around my shaking frame and holding me.

I managed to nod stiffly, holding back the water that was still swirling freely in my empty stomach.

"Why aren't you all spluttery and stuff?" I choked out skeptically, wiping away my hair which was hanging limply on my face.

He chuckled softly and pulled away from me a little, so that he could look me in the eyes.

"My dear Bella," He whispered humorously remorseful. "I'm not sure exactly what it is they taught you in your human life, but when people go swimming they **don't** actually try to swallow the water content of the lake."

I scowled quietly and thrashed through the water to where Alice was swinging lithely on Michal's back, laughing. I realized they were a lot more comfortable around each other than they had been that morning in the forest. A small part of my mind nagged at me, wondering why it was they had acted so bashful and shy around each other, when not an hour earlier they had been joking like old friends. I knew that sooner or later Alice and I would be alone and I made a mental reminder to ask her then.

"See, now isn't this fun?" Michal asked excitedly, swinging Alice around wildly and finally catching her in his arms.

"Yes, yes," I said dismissively, eager not to be seen as the idiot. "You were right, I was wrong. How about we go looking through some caves?"

I thought the suggestion of cave strolling would be enough of an incentive to steer away from the topic of my stubbornness- and fortunately for me, it was.

Michal's eyes shone with adventure as a thousand pictures flitted through his mind, no doubt being somewhat involved with treasure hunts and rewards.

"Well come on captain," I said impatiently, "lead the way to the mighty bounty!"

He smiled assertively, before hoisting Alice closer to his chest and running off towards the shore.

I could hear Alice's joyous laughter echo loudly through the night, even though they were now quite a distance away.

"She's so happy…" Jasper whispered gratefully. "And I really like Michal for her… he's everything I was and so much more.."

I murmured my agreement before lifting myself onto his hips.

"**You** are everything I could want and more.."

His face stretched into a goofy grin and he kissed my sweetly on the lips, before moving his lips towards my ear.

"I love you so much more than I can tell," He whispered softly, his voice breaking slightly with the force of his emotion.

I nodded against his cheek, unable to form words.

That was one of the things I loved most about Jasper. He had the ability to make me laugh and scowl, but then he could say things… such small, simple things, but words that were so moving and touching, that I suddenly felt like I was the only woman that would ever exist to him.

I slid down his body and landed with a splash in the water. The temperature was still warm to my skin, but I noticed that more frost had formed at the edge of the lake, making me wonder weather or not it would snow.

"Bella, Jasper!" Alice called excitedly, waving like a lunatic from the opposite side of the lake. "We found some rock pools and caves, come see!"

I laughed at the childlike nature of her mind when she was around Michal, but I proceeded to walk calmly through the water anyway, off in the direction of their happy auras.

As it turned out, they **had** found quite a few nice little caves. The rocky cave mouths ran just along the shore bank, with a few extra ones peeking out from the side of a cliff face. On closer inspection of the higher ones, I realized that it was a strong possibility that no human had ever been inside; the precipice being too steep and jagged for the fragile exterior of a human being.

"Oooh! Let's take the top ones!" Michal cooed in awe.

"Now, how did I know that you were going to ask that?" I asked laughing and dragging Jasper towards the steep cliff face, ready to take the leap.

Michal seemed to take my movement as a challenge, so he too took to the cliff face, dragging Alice with him.

I had never been interested in rock climbing as a human, but now, walking vertically up the rocky escarpment, I felt free and wild; As if I could climb forever.

Jasper climbed eagerly behind me, swinging from rock to rock, as easily and freely as if he'd been doing it for years.

I grasped the mouth of the cave with my hand and hoisted the rest of my body over the side, rolling effortlessly over the surprisingly smooth rock floor. I felt like a young child, rolling giddily down the slops of a hill, except instead of a hill, it was a stony cave.

I heard Jasper laugh happily as, he too, rolled down the cave and bumped full force into me. I laughed against him and wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him, still smiling against his lips.

Alice and Michal's voices followed soon after in the cave mouth adjacent to ours. I could hear their voices not only in front of me, but behind me too and I wondered weather or not theses caves were connected.

Jasper scooted up next to me, smiling largely from ear to ear. His face, however, froze in mid point when he gazed past my shoulder, staring into the back of the cave.

His mouth fell open in wonder as a large gust of air whooshed out, blowing my damp hair around my face.

I turned slowly to see what Jasper found so impressing, and as I searched the cave in front, my eyes went wide in awe.

**Hahahahaha!**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	42. Dweller

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 41: Dweller

I was sure that what I was looking at was not real, and yet even though I was positive I knew this, I still could not seem to tear my eyes away.

Had I not just been contemplating how impossible it would have been for a fragile human exterior to climb up the steep, rocky precipice? The walls were hard and slippery- not exactly the most simple surface to climb up, even **with** the aid of harnesses and rope.

So why was I seeing this?

Jasper was the first to move, climbing forward carefully on all fours towards the strange assortment of human belongings. The good inside me told me to run, run now and avoid the scent of human and the torture and madness that was sure to follow.

But I wasn't running… Because the scent I smelt right now was anything but human.

It was werewolf.

The scent was old, possibly days, but I recoiled away from it towards the cave mouth, retching and gagging from the repugnant smell. My mind buzzed with a thousand thoughts, each tying to one question.

What was a werewolf doing in Denali?

A low, guttural growl ripped roughly through Jasper's throat and I knew I had my answer.

Jacob.

I moved forward slowly, fighting all normal instincts to breath. Each step seemed to take forever- and suddenly I felt very far from Jasper and very alone.

Jacob was here. Jacob had come to Denali. Jacob had found me. Again.

Jasper was hunched over a pile of notebooks and photographs, breathing heavily and almost sobbing. My heart wrenched for him, and in that moment, I cared nothing for my own safety and wellbeing- Only Jasper's hurt and turmoil.

I ran the rest of the distance that was between us and wrapped my arms around his wide torso, taking his head between my hands.

"I'm sorry… God, Bella, I should have known…"

He repeated these words over and over again, running his fingers over my spine in an attempt to comfort **me**.

"He's been here?" Alice asked slowly, appearing from behind the remains of Jacob's make shift home.

I nodded slowly, careful not to mention his name again.

"Are you sure?" She asked softly, holding a very confused Michal at bay.

Jasper wretched away from me violently and all but threw the contents of the cave at Alice.

"Look at this Alice!" He cried hopelessly, shuffling through hundreds of photographs. "He's been watching us, he's been watching us the entire time!"

I fell to my knees in front of Jasper and began flitting through every photo he had thrown onto the ground. In my arduous haste, I began to breathe deeply, inhaling the foul scent of werewolf once more. But this didn't stop me. I searched through every photo, every picture, every image.

They were all of me.

Pictures of me laughing, pictures of me kissing Jasper, pictures of me at the cabin. It was a collection of snapshots detailing my life since Jacob's last visit.

But then I got to the worst photo of all.

It was only one photo, and unlike the others, this photo seemed to be the only one that had been taken during the entire event.

It was Edward. It was Jasper. And it was me. I was cradled in Jasper's arms, while Edward stood like stone at least three meters from us.

He had photographed the worst moment of my life. He had photographed my breakup with Edward.

I threw the photo away from me and screamed as loudly and as viciously as I could, shaking the stone structure around me.

This wasn't possible, it couldn't be happening. How could Jacob have possibly taken all of these photos without any of us knowing? He was a werewolf for god sake! We would have smelt him.

But what perplexed me the most, was even if Jacob had been far enough away so that we could not smell him, how was it even a possibility that Edward hadn't read his mind?! Jacob had been close to Edward, the photo torn across the room was proof of it.

"This isn't possible…" I whispered out desperately, willing myself to believe it.

"Bella.." Jasper whispered soothingly, moving to grab my shoulders.

"No!" I cried loudly, shaking away from his touch. "This is **not** a possibility! This can **not** have happened… Please, Alice! You have to agree with me! How could we have smelt him?"

Alice looked nervously from me to Jasper, as if struggling to decide on who to believe.

"Well, it does seem a little implausible. I mean, Jasper, really.. How is it we couldn't have known about this?"

Jasper's face seemed permanently etched in distress, as if the events of the day would never wear off. He pushed a hand through his hair and held his head in his hands.

"I don't know.." He mumbled out, saying the words against his palms and muffling the sound. "It would be easy if he had a professional camera or something, just using a really wide lens.. But even that seems unlikely, I mean, where would Jasper get a camera like that in the first place?"

"What about Edward? That photo, he took a photo of that breakup!" I was shaking with anger now, "He was there! How did Edward **not** read his mind? How could he…"

A chilling, terrible thought came to mind. A thought that I prayed to god wasn't real, a thought I prayed would prove false.

What if Edward **had** heard Jacob. He had left so suddenly, I had always thought that he was running from Jasper and I. But what if he was running **after** someone else. What if he had heard Jacob's thoughts in those final moments and had run after him? He had never known that Jacob had visited us, how could he? I had left the barrier up between our minds and his.

"Who's Jacob?" I heard Michal asked softly, trying not to alert me to his questions.

I didn't even try to listen as Alice recounted my past, my mind was much to busy sorting through the conflict. Had Edward betrayed us, betrayed us all and gone to talk to Jacob?

"Bella?" Jasper asked concernedly, noticing my inner argument.

"We have to go back.." I whispered out faintly, barley audible to my own ears.

"What? Bella, we can't! Edward.."

I jumped from my position amongst the photographs and ran towards the mouth of the cave.

"What if that's where Edward's gone?" I asked softly, "What if he heard Jacob and went to find him?"

Jasper stared at me skeptically, working out the information in his own head.

"…Or maybe we should stay here," I said quickly, forming a new plan in my head. "If we wait for him to come back, we can talk to him then, force him to tell us what's going on

"Bella…" Alice whispered apologetically, "I don't think he's coming back.."

"What do you mean? Of course he'll come back, all his stalker evidence is here!"

"Bella, if he's had this much coverage of us… I think… I mean, I think maybe he might already…"

She didn't finish her sentence, she didn't need to. Jacob had already seen us here… he wasn't coming back

"He's been watching us here," I whispered deprecatingly, a shiver shooting sharply up my spine. How long had he been watching us? Five minutes ago? Thirty seconds?

"We're leaving… now," Jasper swooped me into his arms as I stiffened, frozen with fright. "Alice, Michal, grab what ever he's left here. Photos, notebooks, grab it all…"

Alice nodded quickly, gathering the supplies in her arms and handing some to Michal.

I felt Jasper move to the opening of the cave and jump off the edge. The freefall was peaceful for a moment, almost soothing from the fear that was paralyzing me. But it ended all too soon, and once again I was internally screaming in terror.

Why couldn't he leave me alone?

Why wouldn't he just let me go?

Jasper splashed through the water relentlessly, not stopping until we had reached the other side of the lake. I felt weak in his arms, weak and foolish and helpless.

I felt human.

I knew we were inside when the hinges of the front doors swung open roughly, leaving a large dent in the wall opposite.

A strange feeling passed over me then, a strange and unfamiliar feeling. I realized almost at once why it was unfamiliar to me, why it was so foreign. People had always said that I cared less about myself than anyone else. But right now, for the first time in my entire life…

…I was worried for my own life.

**I just want to make it clear that I LOVE Jacob Black. Having read Breaking Dawn I really understand his character better. But for this story I need to have him like this, so for all you Team Jacob guys and gals; I'm sorry!**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	43. Fury

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**,** BUT I just figured out that I DO own Michal! Haha!**

Chapter 42: Fury

This hurts.

Everything hurts. All the time. It seemed as if I could never catch a lucky break anymore. If it wasn't one thing going wrong, it was always the other. When would it stop?

A part of me wondered whether it would have been any different if I had stayed with Edward. Whether I would have faced Jacob like this? Whether I would have had to put up with a constant pain in my heart?

But it didn't matter.

I knew that if I could change time, change fate, I would never do it. I would gladly endure all the pain and heartbreak in the world in exchange for Jasper. In exchange for my meaning of existence.

"Shhhh…. Bella, I'm going to call Carlisle now."

Shh? Has I been speaking out loud? Was my mind so overloaded that I could no longer discern between thought and speech?

I heard a frantic Alice rush through the open door, followed by an equally anxious Michal.

They were murmuring something about notebooks and movements. Threats and strategies. To do with what, I didn't understand. But as the fevered voices grew louder and more coherent, I assumed that the news wasn't good.

The emotions in the room ranged from confusion, to hurt, to betrayal to understanding. The constant and rapid changes made me moody and more perplexed than before.

I gathered from the soft fabric around me, that I was positioned somewhere between the couch and the carpet.

The voices grew louder and more agitated, becoming angry and disbelieving.

I propped myself up on my elbows, thinking that perhaps sight could aid in my understanding of the strange argument.

It didn't.

If anything, it just confused me more. Alice was standing in between Michal and Jasper, shaking with fury and muttering words like 'how?' 'why?' and 'What about the rest of us?' Michal, who was probably as confused about the situation as I, was trying to hold Alice in one piece, stroking a hand through her hair and rubbing her shoulders.

But Jasper… Jasper looked the most hurt; as if someone had just run over his heart with a steam roller and then thrown the tatters at his face.

I jumped of the couch quickly and ran to his side, stroking my hands over his arms.

"What is it?" I asked softly, searching the room for the cause of the disruption.

Alice tried to subtly stand in front of the mounting evidence, shuffling her feet in a disinterested fashion as if trying to convince me there was nothing there.

But I didn't understand. It was just the photos and notebooks from Jacob's hideout. Just meaningless snapshots and scribbles, I couldn't comprehend why it was that….

"The notebooks," I whispered out with sudden clarity. "What do they say?"

Jasper kicked the coffee table in frustration, sending hundreds of glass shards flying across the room.

"You were right…" He muttered angrily, rubbing his hands over his face and trembling with the anger that was threatening to boil over. "You were right about everything…"

He screamed loudly into his palms, tearing his fingers through the front of his hairline in an attempt to focus on something other than the mental anguish that was presently pumping through him like venom.

But I still didn't understand. What was I right about? And what did it have to do with what was with in the stupid notebooks?

I leant forward slowly to pick up a few of the papers, though tattered and torn, they would still tell me what I needed to know.

Jasper swooped in front of me, grabbing all the books that were in my grasp and throwing them into the corner.

"Jasper, don't be ridiculous!" I rebuked harshly, stepping quickly around him only to be snagged by his arms once more.

"I need to know!" I shouted at him, tearing myself from his grip and pushing him across the room.

He fumbled to the ground as easy as a human would have, but for the first time since discovering my feelings for Jasper; I didn't regret my harsh actions.

He was acting incredibly immaturely. Who was he to decide what should and should not be censored for me? If Jacob had written something about me in his creepy stalker journals, I deserved to know.

It was Michal who moved to help him stand again. Jasper brushed him aside in a foolish act of masculinity, and rose to stand right in front of me, eyes livid with fury.

"Bella, this isn't something that can be fixed with a quick hug and a kiss!" He seethed through grated teeth, "This is something that could mean the end of the Cullen family."

"So you think it would be better if I were kept in the dark then?"

He stared at me for a moment of silence, his eyes void of any emotion or answer.

"Jasper, she's right. Why don't we just-"

"Alice please!" He snapped desperately, "Just let me talk to Bella alone for a few minutes… please…"

Alice looked torn between doing what was right for Jasper and leaving me at the hands of a currently unstable vampire. What ever it was that crossed her mind made her nod silently to Jasper and exit the room softly, Michal on tail.

When I was sure that Alice and Michal were at a safe enough distance not to hear us again, I spun to face Jasper- fuming.

"Honestly Jasper," I growled angrily, moving to stand not a foot from his face. "What the hell do you think you're doing?! You can't protect me from these things. If it means danger for our family, do you genuinely think you have any chance of getting me to step aside?"

His face was not set in an angry expression like I expected. But rather, it seemed empty of any life or feeling whatsoever.

I caught his eye for just a fraction of a second and he collapsed to the floor, his body overcome by grief and sadness.

"Bella… I'm sorry.." He cried out desperately, pounding his fist through the floor. "I.. I can't protect you.. I can't protect us… I don't know what to do…"

In that moment there was no more anger from Jasper, no more sadness. All the frustration that had built up had disappeared and in it's place was nothing but fear.

A shiver crept up my spine, creeping from my toes to the back of my neck and shuddering the foundations of my body.

If Jasper was scared, what hope would I have?

"Jasper, I need you to tell me what's going on…" I whispered out softly, stroking a hand through his hair and forcing him to look at me. "I want to understand, but I can't if you don't tell me what's going on."

His eyes were glassy with venom and their familiar honey depths had all but shrunken away to a deep, black hole. He stared from my eyes to my lips, then back to my eyes again.

I was suddenly pinned beneath his weight as his lips worked feverishly against mine, pouring his fear into me. Every nightmare, every terror I had ever felt was nothing compared to this. My body shook violently as I was overcome by the paralyzing depths of panic that were engulfing Jasper. I pushed at his shoulders, throwing him off me and towards the mass of photographs and papers.

"I said I wanted to help…" I choked out breathlessly, "Not drown in your own emotions.."

Jasper smiled apologetically and sighed loudly, leaning his head against his arms.

"Here," He whispered out softly, holding out one sheet from Jacob's notebook in particular. "This should explain everything.."

I crept forward on all fours, taking the crumpled sheet of paper and sitting in Jasper's lap.

Most of the words just looked like scribble, rough lines etched in blotchy ink. There were a few short sketches of me, hundreds of splattered ink dots and a small enclosed passage at the bottom of the page.

As soon as I read the first word, I knew that I had found what Jasper feared. Three small words. That's all it was. Three insignificant words that meant nothing by themselves. But structured as they were, they conveyed more to me than if Jacob himself had shouted the message from the roof tops.

'_Leech visited today.'_

A small sob strangled from my throat as the meaning of the words set in.

Edward had found Jacob. He had betrayed us all.

I turned the scrunched piece of paper over, scanning my eyes for more information. I found a small note etched at the corner, which only proved my growing fears correct.

'_I've got to talk to the others about it… But I think now is as good a time as ever. We can take them down, take every last one of them down. But we'll save her till last. Let her watch the blond burn.'_

The blond… My Jasper…

I felt my body convulse with an anger that I never knew existed. It shuddered and rippled in fury, making me lose sight of anything good and pure. The growl of a scream that ripped from my throat shocked even me. It was raw and blunt, loud and lethal enough to shatter every existing window in the small lodge.

I ran from Jasper's arms, frightened of what I may do in my fit of ferocity. I passed a very shocked Alice and Michal, but I continued running forward, never losing sight of the cliff face ahead.

When I reached the precipice that held Jacob's stowaway cave, I thundered my fists against the rock violently, releasing all of the anger and hurt. I watched as it shuddered beneath my fists and began to collapse onto itself. I wished more than anything for Jacob to be stupid enough to have come back and be hiding in the cave right now. I wanted him to hurt for what he had done, I wanted him to die.

After five minutes of pounding, the entire rock structure had fallen away to a dusty pile of ash and gravel. I wondered vaguely what natural disasters the humans would blame this on when they discovered it. How would they explain the sudden change in topography?

A high pitched ringing redirected my attention to the broken cabin on the lake. The sane part of my mind told me that a phone was ringing and I raced back full force across the water so that I could inspect the proceeding conversation.

The voices speaking were short and blunt, keeping the conversation to an absolute minimum. When I reached the front door, Alice was watching anxiously as Jasper tried in vain to convince the voice on the other end to explain.

The exchange was over before I could grasp any real understanding of what they were talking about, but the final words from the other end were as clear as if they had shouted them in my ears.

"Come home," sounded out sharply, before the dial tone rang out.

**Ha.**

**Questions? Comments?**

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	44. Regret

**All of you guys… Haha, oh you guys! You all thought… He he… well, I'm not making any sense, so let's just read along and find out!**

**Disclaimer: Michal's mine, Twilight is not… Oh Jasper…**

Chapter 43: Regret

"_Come home…"_

Such small words. Why such huge meaning?

Were they calling because they were in danger? Or were they calling because it was, in fact, us that needed the protection?

Jasper threw the receiver down forcefully, cursing loudly. He moved to brush a hand through his hair roughly and kicked the edge of the derelict coffee table, shattering the fine glass table top.

"We're leaving…" He muttered softly, gathering the remaining evidence from Jacob's cave and stuffing notes into his pockets.

I nodded silently and continued, as he was, picking up all the notes I could find. Every now and then I would find a small sketch that caused me to shudder and dry heave. A lewd and vulgar image depicting me with Jacob, kissing Jacob, touching him. It took all I had not to tear the notes up and burn them, but I knew that if I did, we may give up vital information from Jacob's sick, twisted mind.

Alice and Michal followed suit, running around the room hastily, collecting all the photographs and notebooks that were scattered like our minds.

"Was it Carlisle?" Alice asked softly, trying in vain to hold back the sadness leaking through her tone.

Jasper nodded curtly, glancing around the room once more for anything we could have missed.

"He didn't say much…" Jasper seethed, his voice thick with contempt, "Just that, we had to come back and that 'the wolves would come.' I tried to tell him about Edward…"

Alice stifled a small sob, throwing her hands to her mouth and shaking her head roughly. She wasn't one to kick and make a fuss over a situation; Alice suffered silently. But her closest brother's betrayal had left a large wound in her heart and I wondered quietly how Alice would ever be complete.

Michal moved behind her, rubbing her shoulders comfortingly and kissing her forehead. She spun around in his arms quickly, muffling her face into his shoulder and crying into the fabric. My heart ached terribly for her, but I was happy that Michal was here to comfort her. Here to be her rock, her support.

Jasper's eyes seemed to lighten the tiniest amount at the exchange between Alice and Michal. Amongst all the darkness and the anger that had set in, it was nice to see a tiny glimmer of hope still present in the love between Alice and Michal. A young, fresh love. A love that hadn't yet have to face the hardships that would inevitably come.

I threw one more glance towards them and watched the way they looked. Watched the way Michal's arms snaked around her waist like a protective cage, watched as Alice rested her head against him softly; her sobs all but dried up.

I left the room and ran to the car quickly, wrenching the back door open and chucking all the papers in. Jasper followed shortly after, dragging the suitcases out the door and pushing them roughly into the boot.

He was angry. But above all else, he was hurt.

Hurt that Edward would do this to him, to us. Was death the only option in Edward's eyes? Was there no other answer to the heart ache and the pain that had engulfed him?

I walked up slowly behind Jasper, wrapping my arms around his torso.

"Do you regret it?" I asked softly, stifling the sob in my throat.

He didn't turn to face me, but rather, stared off pensively into the distance. "What?" He asked slowly, his voice barley above monotone.

I released him from my stubborn grip and backed up a few paces, wary to what Jasper's answer may do to me.

"Me?" I choked out desperately.

Jasper turned to face me slowly, his face contorted with a deep mask of pain.

"What?! Bella, no-"

"You're so angry!" I interrupted him, throwing my hands wildly in the air. "How can I not think it? If I'd never got involved with you then everything could have continued like it had. Nothing would have changed, and Edward would still be here. He would still be a part of this family, instead of the enemy on the outskirts, threatening to destroy us."

What ever small string of sanity that was delicately holding onto my composure, snapped in that moment and I hurtled to the ground in a pit of despair. How had it come to this? Losing everything around me in a quake of death and mayhem, losing my family, my husband. How was it that once person could cause so much pain?

I was the variable. I could eliminate myself and everything could go back to how it was. Would Jacob still pursue this bloodshed if my life was out of the equation?

Jasper was crushing my body to his before I could take the thought any further. Even here, compacted against his stone chest in an obscure position, it seemed as if I fit there, fit every contour and every line of his body. I scrunched the fabric of his shirt in my fists as I crushed his lips to mine, exploring the familiar feeling of his mouth.

The anger I could feel emanating from Jasper was no longer harsh and undirected, it was upset and completely controlled. He was angry at me. Not for messing things up, or for causing so much pain, but for believing that I was the root of it. The cause of the hurt and the grief that had befallen us. His hand wound tightly in my hair, securing my face to his as his mouth worked in unison with mine, his teeth nipping lightly at my tongue.

When he finally pulled away for an unnecessary breath, his lips moved to my ear and he growled the words so low, that if I hadn't heard them, I would have most certainly misinterpreted his tone for furiously livid.

"You are my everything!" He fumed quietly, "I would give up everything I have to be with you, so don't you **ever** ask me if I regret you. Not now, or during any future disaster this family may suffer through!"

I nodded silently against his cheek, elated that he did not regret our relationship or my involvement with the family.

Michal appeared at the front door with Alice held tightly against his chest in much the same fashion that I was held against Jasper's. Alice's face seemed so hollow, so empty- As if Michal was her last strong hold that she was desperately holding onto for dear life.

I watched as Michal closed the front door behind him and locked the deadbolt tightly. It seemed sort of comical that he was locking the door, when every single window in the small lodge had broken from my ear shattering scream.

"We're ready," Michal said softly, holding Alice tighter to him. "Do you think you can drive Jasper? I would, but Alice is just so.."

"Of course," Jasper replied quickly. "Just hop in the back, we have to leave now."

Michal gave a small smile of gratitude, but for the first time since I had met Michal, the smile did not reach his eyes. I hopped down from Jasper's steel grasp and walked over to the passenger seat, jerking the door open roughly. Michal slipped into the backseat quietly, lying Alice out along the seats and resting her head on his lap. I turned around to stroke the stray hairs from her eyes and smiled comfortingly, to which I received an equally pained smile from Alice.

Jasper began to pull out of the shrouded drive way swiftly, but stopped abruptly and ran from the car, disappearing back into the lodge through a broken window. Michal and I exchanged the same perplexed glance, before Jasper was back in the car, armed with what appeared to be hundreds of cool bags.

"And this is?" I asked, gesturing to the icepacks and freezer bags.

He slammed the gas pedal down, sliding out of the driveway rapidly like a shadow camouflaged by the dark night.

"…I'm sorry Bella, Michal… but, we don't have time for the long routes tonight. I need to take the highway home.."

The realization of what he was saying set in as I understood completely what that meant for Michal and I. If we passed any cars, the bloodlust would be indescribable. We would be like wild animals, trapped temporarily by a steel, moving cage.

Michal seemed as stressed about the situation as I was, his emotions alternating between fear and frustration.

"So what's with the bags then?" Michal asked slowly, aiming to regulate his voice back to one of a calm, tranquil person.

"Carlisle always keeps blood on ice… I thought maybe we could satisfy the blood lust long enough to get you out of harms way."

"So it's iceblocks of blood?" I asked in a disgusted manner, remembering back to the cool drinks of bear blood I had drunk at Denali.

"I know it's not the most gratifying," Jasper soothed softly, sensing my discomfort. "But it's the best I can do with a bad situation. It's so early in the morning, I doubt we'll come across anyone anyway…"

This fact gave me a small amount of comfort. How many drivers would there be on the road at 2am? Even so, I grabbed one of the freezer bags and held the blood to my chest tightly, allowing it to become my safety net. The next few hours would be hell and what I needed more than anything, was something to catch me if I were to fall.

* * *

The car trip from Denali had been spent in silence, each of us thinking individually on what we would come to find when we arrived home. For the first time in weeks, luck had been on our side, and the car managed to slide effortlessly through the lanes without reaching any other cars that weren't at a safe distance. Michal and I clutched tightly at the ice packs every time a car's headlights would appear a mile off, but the car would always pass without difficulty, never reaching within an arousing distance. Every now and then, Alice would stir from her silence on Michal's lap, murmuring something about betrayal and the bonds of family and friendship. I mostly tried not to listen to the grumblings, already feeling mostly at fault for Edward's disloyalty.

When the Mercedes finally pulled on to the familiar stone pebbles, I felt my stomach sink to the pit of my body, afraid of how we would face the families eyes.

Esme.

How could we tell Esme that her first son had betrayed her?

Carlisle. Would Carlisle believe it? Would he accept what had happened or would he blatantly deny anything and be of no use at all?

When the car rolled to a smooth halt I basically threw myself from the door, not even bothering to check if the others were doing the same.

I flung the front door open wildly, not knowing that at the same time, a person from the other end had pulled it open. In perfect human Bella fashion, I slammed straight into whoever had opened the door and fell to the smooth, marble floors. Jasper ran to my aid straight away, but stopped and growled loudly when he had reached not a foot away from me.

I stared at Jasper to see what had been the cause of his sudden anger, but was instead, blown a crippling amount of sadness, making me lurch over the tile floor and clutch wildly at the feet in front of me.

Much to my surprise, the feet backed away quickly, as if I had some terrible disease that they did not wish to inherit. When my composure finally returned, I stared up from the dirty, leather shoes in front of me and gazed up the lean, muscular body that was attached.

My head snapped back as my eyes came into contact with two familiar golden orbs. Two distraught, troubled golden eyes. I scrambled to my feet as I stood in front of the man who was our Judas. The man who had betrayed us all and sent certain death upon his family.

As my body clouded with anger and hurt, one word left my mouth formed from utter hatred and hurt;

"Edward."

**?!**

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	45. Misunderstanding

**I am so tired.**

**Thank you my wonderful reviewers, I love you all so much. Anonymous reviewers; ann, DazzlebyJasper, Lecia and Emmettismylife thank you for your very kind reviews!**

**Okay, so I was thinking that maybe I WILL try to finish this story without a sequel. It's just, I have a few ideas for completely separate JasperxBella stories, which I'm really excited to write haha! So I don't know… I'll have to think of how to sum up this one.**

**Also, I can tell you right now that there is no way that I can update tomorrow, sorry.**

**Anyhoo, Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 44: Misunderstanding

Edward had come home.

Though it didn't seem justified that I should refer to this place as his 'home' anymore. Any home that we had created was to be torn apart by Edward's actions. He didn't deserve to think of it as his abode, his sanctuary, his family.

I could see his eyebrows twitch in anticipation as he waited for the onslaught that was sure to come. But what else would he expect? Did he believe we would take his betrayal lying down? That we would understand his heart break and so condone his choice? Or perhaps he believed us to be ignorant of the entire situation. He would have no idea that we knew. Was it possible that he simply thought we knew nothing of his perfidy?

Jasper wrenched me to my feet roughly, pushing me behind his body and standing defensively in front of me.

"You have no place here…" Jasper whispered out menacingly, baring his teeth at Edward.

I was blown are rough wave of sadness, causing me to lurch towards Jasper's protective arms and stagger on my feet.

"I know…" Edward whispered out solemnly, staring distraughtly at the points where Jasper and I touched.

Jasper chuckled dryly, all the humor having left his voice. "Keep your remorse for someone who cares!" He seethed dangerously, taking a step closer to Edward's face. "If you hadn't run to find Jacob, none of this would be happening and we could still-"

"That's enough Jasper," Carlisle chastised calmly, appearing from behind Edward's shoulder.

"How can you say that?" I asked skeptically, feeling the venom pump wildly through my veins. "How can you dismiss what he's done? What he's doing?"

Jasper nodded agreeingly, holding my hand tightly in his.

"Bella please," Carlisle soothed softly, "I don't believe you have the entire story.. If you would just let him speak."

I stared skeptically at my father, as if expecting him to burst out laughing at any minute and ask me to hit Edward.

He didn't.

"Carlisle!" I cried frustratingly, searching through my pockets wildly for the papers I knew were there. "Look! Look at this note we found in Jacob's journals. It says 'The Leech visited…. It's time to take them down!' How else am I suppose to interpret that? Edward had betrayed us all!"

Edward flinched back from my words as if the very truth of them had scorched his skin. He looked sadly from me to Jasper to Michal and Alice, but did not deny the allegations being made against him.

He sighed softly, staring down at the floor.

"She's right Carlisle.." He whispered quietly, "I betrayed my entire family… I have brought about your certain death."

This was apparently the only conformation that Alice needed. She lurched forward at Edward's words, bringing her hand back sharply and slapping him right on the front of his face. The sound created reverberated through the some-what hollow house, causing several fine objects to shudder slightly on their mantles.

"How could you Edward?" Alice sobbed out dryly, "I am your sister, **we** are your family."

He gave her a pained, apologetic face before she stormed inside, Michal followed closely behind her.

"Alice, Michal please," Carlisle said evenly, his tone never straying above a quiet murmur. "I need you to listen to Edward. I believe there has been a grave misunderstanding."

I rolled my eyes, completely disbelieving to the entire situation.

"Then we will listen," Jasper agreed reluctantly, "But I warn you father. If any of us sense that Edward is being dishonest, we **will** finish this."

"I'm dishonest?" Edward rebutted quickly, his lips set in a tight line. "And this is coming from the brother who slept with my wife while I was in Italy? Honestly Jasper, you have no right to call me dishonest!"

Jasper flinched back as if Edward had struck him, which seemed to please Edward. He smiled ruefully at Jasper, though his eyes reflected no amusement whatsoever.

"I don't have to listen to this," Jasper fumed softly, pulling me closer to his side.

"Oh but perhaps you do Jasper," Edward added quickly, his face contorting into a sick scowl. "You see, I think that maybe you're missing the redeemable quality known as honesty. You act all high and mighty around Esme and Carlisle, but really, you only wanted Bella because someone else had her!"

"My sons, stop." Carlisle said quickly, before the argument could continue.

Jasper growled roughly, using all the strength he had not to jump Edward right there. I wrapped an arm around his chest, willing him to believe that I knew it wasn't true.

"You see Jasper," Edward continued, thoroughly pleased with the reactions he had received so far. "Bella is a simple creature, all she really wants is to be loved. When she realizes that you do not, in fact, love her- She will leave. I wouldn't be surprised if she wasn't thinking it right now…"

I held my fists tightly against my skin, not wishing to pummel Edward to a pulp in front of my father.

Jasper smiled wryly, baring every single tooth to Edward's smug face.

"Funny thing then," He continued slowly, milking the situation for all it worth. "Why is it that Bella screams out my name in ecstasy when I'm inside her? That is, if she didn't really want me."

Edward unleashed a wild, guttural growl, launching himself at Jasper, his eyes livid with fury.

Carlisle moved to block Edward, but since I was both faster and stronger, I stepped in. I held Jasper and Edward apart with both my arms, wrapping my hands around there throats. It would never kill them, but I needed to silence the angry, testosterone fuelled argument that was sure to battle on for hours.

They both sputtered angrily against my grip, wishing to be the one with the last word in. As much as I loved Jasper, I didn't want him detailing our sex life beyond what he'd already said. As for the hand I had gripped around Edward so tightly, I could really only give the explanation as the fact that I was simply incredibly pissed off at him.

"Okay Bella," Carlisle said softly, "I think they understand. You can let go."

I released their throats slowly, watching carefully for any sudden movements from either of them. When it seemed as if they had both given up the fight, I peeled my fingers from their skin, but remained situated between them.

_How ironic_, my mind added thoughtfully. _Yet again, you are stuck between the middle of them…_

I dismissed the thought inwardly, too distracted to appreciate the humor within the apparent familiarities of the situations.

"Are we done with the acts of masculinity?" I asked sardonically, raising my eyebrows to both of them.

They nodded synchronistically, though neither of them seemed happy.

"Edward, you need to talk. Now. If you don't want us jumping to weird conclusions and gathering all sorts of misunderstandings you need to explain to us where you have been the past few days."

He looked torn between answering me and running from my very presence. I understood that this was hard for him, being on the same continent as me, let alone the same room.

Eventually, however, he sighed with acceptance of the situation and slouched against the sandstone steps, burying his head between his hands.

"You think I went to Jacob to create some giant plan to kill you all?" He asked softly, peeking up quickly to gauge our reactions.

"Yes," I admitted honestly, wishing to just know the truth of it all.

"Well I didn't," He replied quietly. "I went to Jacob so that I could die."

I was completely aware of the fact that I was standing on dry land, and yet somehow, standing between my suicidal ex-husband and my perpetually lovable new boyfriend, I felt as if I was drowning.

Edward had gone to die. He had left so that Jacob would kill him. A thousand voices of guilt and disappointment screamed through my head at once so that I could not distinguish one voice from another. I felt like the lowest scum on the earth. The scum that deserved to be exterminated.

What did I say now? Did I backtrack? Pretend as if the entire thing was a hug joke? I had just called Edward the betrayer, I had told him he was wrong, when in fact it was I who was so without the truth.

I could feel the guilt and shame pour through me like corrosive acid, eating away at my flesh and body, and leaving me a shallow mockery of my former self. I wanted to grovel, to beg for forgiveness, but instead, I did the only thing I thought suitable for the situation. The only thing that was acceptable.

I apologized.

**So tired.**

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	46. Helpless

**Aw, you guys! I was having a crappy day, but when I read all your reviews they made me happy!**

**This is a another short chapter… yeah, sorry..**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 45: Helpless

I was an appalling person.

I had, of course, always suspected this before. But now, in my current situation, I was sure that it was true.

I listened intently as Edward recounted the details of his life from the past few days. He spoke low and quick, eager to finish what must have been an incredibly uncomfortable conversation for him. I listened as he spoke of his heartbreak in the woods, I listened as he told us of Jacob's mind, how he had heard the thoughts of his vile joy and the way Jacob relished in the pain.

When he began to talk of his chase into the woods, I felt my body quake in guilt and fear as I realized that I was the catalyst of his suicide search. I felt Jasper's fingers run comfortingly over my hands, but they stopped abruptly when we both felt the rush of pain from Edward's already contorted emotions.

Alice's face was stricken with horror as Edward delved deeper into his confrontation with Jacob. He told us that Jacob had refused his request for death at first, wishing to draw out the pain and heartbreak Edward was experiencing.

"He refused.. '_I think you should feel what it's like_,' he told me." Edward's face had twisted into anger as he narrated Jacob's cruel words. "He told me that I should feel exactly what he did when Bella chose a '_bloodsucker over life_!'"

Alice drew in a sharp breath and Michal pulled her closer into his side, resting her head upon his shoulder.

Edward seemed to cringe away from Michal and Alice's comforting moment, as if immensely hurt by the fact that Alice had appeared to move on so quickly.

"But Jacob wrote that it was time to take us all down," Jasper interrupted quickly, "Did he say anything at all about finishing us all?"

Edward's answer was obvious in his eyes. The pupils seemed to dilate rapidly as he ducked his head in an effort to hide the effect of Jasper's words. I could feel my stomach tie into a thousand knots as I waited anxiously for Edward's answer.

"He said something once," Edward whispered out softly, "Just one thing, after his initial refusal of my death wish; _'Killing you know would be merciful. You will die though, and a thick black smoke will rise up through this town when the remains of you and your bloodsucking family burn. __**Then**__ you'll have a death wish._'"

I wanted to scream. And perhaps that 'want' became reality, because the next thing I noticed was Jasper's large hand over my mouth as he cradled me against his chest, rocking me back and forth.

Alice and Michal had rushed from the room and Jasper picked me up fluently in his arms, and began to move towards the kitchen.

"I sure know how to clear a room…" Edward whispered out solemnly.

"This isn't your fault," Jasper replied softly, standing awkwardly in a mid-move from the room.

Edward rolled his eyes, blowing rough air from his lips.

"_Oh Edward.._" My mind whispered internally, _"Always so self sacrificing…_"

I wanted to hit myself for thinking such a snide comment, especially considering what a bitch I had been to the man who almost killed himself because I broke his heart.

"Look Edward," Jasper began uncomfortably. "I know things can't ever go back to how they were, but I'm really sorry… about everything. What I've done, what I said… maybe in a few centuries you can forgive me."

"Maybe.." Edward replied indifferently, throwing us once last pained expression before heading up the stairs.

"What now?" I asked softly, hopping smoothly from Jasper's iron grasp.

I had never felt more helpless in my entire life. How could we plan, how could we prepare when we had nothing to go on but the words of a madman? Alice was useless in situations like these. With the wolves as the predators she was blind to any decisions they might make. They could turn up today. Tomorrow. They could be on their way right now.

"I don't know what to do…" Jasper whispered out honestly. "We've always been able to do something before, we've been able to 'see.' Now we're.. we're.."

"Sitting ducks?" I asked, attempting to inject some humor into the volatile situation.

"Something like that…"

It seemed as if we were stuck temporarily in fast forward. As if everything around us moved at the speed of light and left the rest of us standing dumbly in the centre.

"I need… to rest…" Jasper whispered out slowly.

"I wish we could… I wish that rest was possible."

Jasper chuckled softly, kissing my forehead.

"I suppose you're right." He whispered back, "I should talk to Emmett… We need to think of something, anything that we could do."

I nodded against his chest, holding back the fresh sobs that I knew would break loose when I was alone.

"Go talk man plans," I smiled weakly, standing on my toes to kiss his softly and tenderly.

He nodded, squeezing my hands tightly before moving to the kitchen.

I wasn't sure what I could do now. And I hated it. I hated this crappy feeling. This stupid human feeling like there was nothing I could to stop my death. The death of everyone around me, my family, my kin, my lover.

I trudged up the stairs slowly, completely unaware of where I was actually headed. I knew little about the large maze of hallways of this house, and I soon found myself wondering aimlessly around the fourth floor. I didn't know where Edward would go, whether he had a room, or whether he would run again.

I could hear low murmurings from the room down the hall and I prayed to god that it wasn't Edward.

"I don't know what to do.." I recognized the voice as Alice's and I crept forward slowly, curious as to what she was doing here.

"There's not much we can do," Michal replied, his emotions flooded with a mixture of fear and sympathy.

I skulked forward lightly, my feet barley touching the smooth, wooden floors.

I reached the door and managed to peep my eye through the area that was just slightly ajar. I felt incredibly like a peeping tom, but my happiness over the blossoming relationship overshadowed any of the guilt and helplessness I was feeling- so I stayed.

Michal had his hands on Alice's shoulders as she stared down glumly at the floor.

"I'm scared Michal.. I'm so scared of everything," Alice's body began to shudder with sobs as Michal held her head against his chest. "And not just of death… of you.."

Michal laughed softly.

"You're scared of me?"

She hit his chest roughly, never breaking from her somber mood.

"That's not what I mean!" She cried out, whimpering softly. "I'm scared of what I'm feeling, what it means."

Michal sucked in his breath noisily, shocked by Alice's openness.

"I don't know what it is.. Jasper broke my heart, but with you.. With you it's like.."

"Your mended?" Michal asked, his emotions torn between elation and fright.

Alice lifted her head slowly, staring Michal straight in the eyes and nodding.

"You've made me whole again." She whispered softly. "So yes! I'm terrified of death, but above all else, I'm terrified of losing this.. Of losing you.."

In that one moment of love, I felt everything else in the world fall away. There was nothing but pure, unconditional adoration and I wished, more than anything in the world, that it would never change.

I moved to step away from the door and at the same time, Michal moved closer to Alice. He inclined his head slowly, testing Alice's reaction. Alice needed nothing more, she closed the rest of the distance between them, locking her arms around his neck and meeting his lips in a passionate kiss.

I stumbled away from the door somewhat quietly, feeling that I had already witnessed more than enough.

I was overcome with the joy I felt for Michal and Alice, and in that moment I made a decision about my future. What ever happened with the wolves, what ever circumstances that presented themselves I knew that what we would do.

We would fight for our lives.

We would fight for our family.

But, above everything, we would fight for our love.

**Pft.**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	47. Eve of Battle

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 46: Eve of Battle

It was raining now. The clouds rolled angrily over the looming sky, crawling closer and closer to us, foreshadowing the coming death. I decided in that moment that the grim reaper was a terrible misconception of the figure death. If only death **did** come in the form of a dark, hooded skeleton. If only all the bad guys **were** identified by their shrouded faces, their dark clothing and their pointy weapons.

The truth was that they rarely were.

The enemies and the evil lived among us. Disguised with false faces of friendship, people that were once good friends. They were friends, family, strangers on the street. People that wore smiles on their faces, offered kindness and help. They were the most dangerous enemies of all.

_At least the monsters acknowledged what they were…_ My mind added softly, _At least they never pretended to be anything other than evil_.

I nodded slowly, responding to myself. Monsters never pretended. It was people like Jacob Black that were the most dangerous. Because in killing us all, he believed he was doing right. His mind truly accepted the fact as truth that there was no possible way that we could both survive in the world. Two ancient mythical breeds, enemies to each other and the rest of the world.

The rain grew rougher, soaking through my clothes and making my hair stick messily against my slick forehead. I leaned against the sandstone, staring out towards the forest. There was almost no moon in the sky and I took comfort in that fact. The superstitious side of me thought that a full moon would be an omen for the wolves, as if they might take it as a sign to attack.

A small movement in the bush caught my attention. I noticed Caterina-Lucetta walking out from the forest, wiping a spot of blood from her lip. She must have been hunting. When she first spotted me, she stood still for a moment, as if contemplating whether to run back the way she had come. I gathered that I would be thought of as somewhat an enemy to Caterina. After all, before she had met me, Caterina would have known a much different Edward than the one he was now. Now he was a shallow travesty mocking the human form. He was empty, suicidal and alone.

Eventually, Caterina must have understood that I had already spotted her, so she walked towards me slowly, her shoulders hunched forward in a slightly defensive position. The wind and rain blew her dark hair around her face wildly, framing her sharp golden eyes in a pointed glare.

She really was quite beautiful.

"Hello Bella…" She whispered meekly, a voice that in no-way matched her fierce, untamed appearance.

I smiled my hello, gesturing for her to sit down next to me.

"Nice hunt?" I asked politely, noticing the blood that had trapped beneath her nails and in her hair.

She nodded slowly, staring out towards the forest. "I like the bears…" She added softly, smiling to herself.

I laughed a low, deep chuckle.

"You should get along well with Emmett then… Did you have time to bond at all before.. Well, you know.. While we were away?"

There was a minute of awkward silence while I waited for Caterina to respond. The air was clammy with tension and I found that Caterina's emotions seemed to mirror my own.

"I had a lot of fun," She said after several minutes. "I've never lived so care-free before. Emmett is a lot of fun to be around and Rose is like the sister I never had…"

I nodded slowly, acknowledging her words before processing something she had said.

"This is care-free for you?" I asked skeptically, thinking on how stressful this time had been for me.

"Compared to Italy it is…"

"Of course," I said quickly, trying to backtrack my words.

"It's okay," She said softly, smiling reassuringly. "This is a very hard time for you, I understand… If Edward hadn't…"

She muttered off harshly, rubbing her hands over her wet arms. Caterina was angry. Caterina was angry at Edward. I was taken back by this fact and I stumbled from the sandstone, landing in a large puddle of water.

She laughed a melodious sound at me, extending out a long, pale hand.

"You okay there?"

I nodded rapidly, taking her strong grasp in mine.

Once I was safely back on the step, I breathed out the long gust of breath that I hadn't realized I was holding. The wind lashed back roughly, as if offended by the weak blow of air that had spewed from my lips. I shuddered as the breeze tickled my skin, moist with large drops of rain. Rain that continued to beat down relentlessly against our stone home.

After several minutes of mutual silence, Caterina sighed loudly, announcing her preparation to depart. She stood gracefully stretching her arms an legs in several positions that humans would find impossible.

"I'm off to shower," She said decisively, smiling at me softly before doing the most surprising thing of all; kissing my forehead.

I stared dumbly at her as she stood up straight once more, brushing her dirty hands on her khaki shorts. She smiled at my puzzled expression, causing her eyes to sparkle with delight and her grin to reveal every pearly tooth in her mouth. She turned to leave me and reached for the large, brass handle of the front door. Without turning around, she whispered one short sentence to me, that -had I been human- I would not have heard.

"I don't hate you," She said softly, tracing her finger over the carvings in the door. "You're family now. And family means forgiveness… Give him time."

With those final words, she swung the large door open and disappeared into the darkened lobby, leaving nothing behind but a small set of wet footprints.

My body seemed to be frozen in a permanent stare beyond Caterina's shadow. I had been sure that she had hated me and yet her previous words had seemed to prove my suspicions incorrect.

I stumbled from my position on the sandstone to walk around the side of the large house to the patio. It seemed like hundreds of years ago that I had first walked onto this patio with Jasper.

_There was a large fountain in the centre of the patio, and it was chilling how much it reminded me of the fountain in Italy. There was a large spout at the middle of the fountain and then three smaller, surrounding spouts, branching of from the largest one._

"_I never want to leave this place…" I said softly, running my hand through the cool water, and picking up a pond lily. I could see my reflection in the rippling water and my face looked so content. I was so enthralled by my current surroundings that I wanted to dive into the shallow pool of water and just float over the surface._

"_You like it then…?" He asked timidly, sitting down next to me at the edge of the fountain._

"_It's beautiful…" I replied, staring at our reflection together in the water._

"_Do you want to see the rest of the house now?" He asked, moving his hand onto mine._

_I nodded softly, not really wanting to leave my perfect place._

I never **should** have left. It would have been smart if I had just drowned in that fountain… or at least attempted it.

I staggered over towards the large fountain and sat, feet in, on the edge. The lilies swirled around my feet as I slipped beneath the water, soaking my already wet clothing. The fountain was quite large, but I was still squished between the rim and the spout.

After a few minutes, I felt two strong arms wrap around my waist and pull me from the water. Jasper smiled weakly his eyes dull with worry.

I stepped out of the water and slid from the slippery surface towards the front entrance.

"That's a good look for you…" Jasper whispered seductively, his eyes raking across my wet body.

I stepped closer to him, resting my head on the nape of his neck.

"Did you and Emmett think of anything?" I asked softly, already dreading the answer.

He shrugged against me, walking me backwards towards the wall.

"We went over a few more of the notes… doesn't say much. But since it's Jacob we're talking about, I think we can safely assume that he's not going to hold out for much longer…"

I hit the wall with a thump and wrapped my legs around his waist.

He was so beautiful… it was agonizingly painful to think that any harm could befall him.

He kissed across my chest, leaving soft, moist marks from his lips.

"Where's Edward?" I asked quickly, breathing embarrassingly loudly.

Jasper's body stiffened against me as he brought his chin up to look me in the eyes.

"You're thinking about Edward now?" He asked softly, his face contorted into an expression of pain.

I kissed him roughly on the mouth, bringing his face closer to mine.

"Not like that!" I snapped harshly, grinding roughly against him and making his eyes roll back in his head. "I just thought that maybe it wouldn't be best for my suicidal ex to see us like this!"

He murmured his incoherent agreement before tightening his grip around me and peeling me from the wall. As he ran through the house quickly, I gyrated my hips against his slowly, rhythmically moving them with each bound Jasper took.

"Plleaase… Bella… stop… I can't.. I have no control.." Jasper's voice was raspy with desire as I continued to move excruciatingly slowly against the object of his lust.

We ran past an amused Emmett, but didn't dare to stop, lest the lust completely overcome us.

The bedroom door burst open roughly, crashing into the opposite wall. Jasper dropped me slowly and I whimpered softly, missing the feel of him between my legs.

I watched as he picked the door up in his hands and molded it back into the frame, sanding the sides down with his hands and melding the hinges together. I would have laughed at his hastiness but I was too turned on by the sharp, angular planes of his chest. Muscles that begged me to touch them, kiss them, caress them.

He sauntered towards me slowly, his eyes clouded with a dangerous lust. I backed up quickly, though my mind told me there was nothing to fear, my gut screamed at the predator.

The back of my knees hit the edge of the bed and I fell back clumsily, scattering away as Jasper jumped at the edge of the bed, growling low and heatedly.

I was being stupid! This was Jasper, he was just trying to scare me… so why was I falling for it? Why was I hyperventilating in fear?

His eyes never left mine, but his hands darted out rapidly, grabbing both my ankles in his hands and pulling me towards the end of the bed. My hands clawed at the headboard, trying to glue myself there. It didn't work. If anything it only incensed Jasper's pursue. He pulled my roughly towards him, slapping his pelvis against mine in a friction that was almost painfully pleasurable. I moaned loudly and Jasper growled, slapping a hand to my mouth.

"You can moan when I say you can moan," He whispered out low and quick, the hardness between his thighs making his demand incredibly difficult to obey. "Payback for all your 'hip-play' on the stairs.."

I nodded mutely against his hand, inwardly cursing myself for being so aroused. Why were the 'bad boys' always the most attractive?

He moved his hips slowly against mine, rubbing me in every place that I wanted and causing me to leave a painful gash on my inner cheek from biting to prevent screaming.

His hands crept slowly over my abdomen, walking underneath my wet shirt and leaving light touches across the supple flesh of my breasts. I whimpered, unable to suppress the sounds of pleasure. He smiled wickedly, hardening his touch and causing me to jerk my hips against the tight pressure in his pants. He smiled disturbingly wide and moved his hands back from my shirt, pushing them beneath my bum and pulling me tightly at him.

"God… Jasper.. Please, please, please.." I was begging like a child but I wanted -no- I **needed** him now.

I should have known that he would never end my torment that quickly. No. Instead, he moved his face down my neck, across my breasts, down my stomach, to my pelvis -and stopped.

I shivered and tried to get him to move closer but he stayed still, immobile over the centre of my desire, the place where heat scorched off me at hundreds of degrees.

His hands crawled up my thighs and began to slowly, but surely, take my shorts off. I wished he would simply rip them off, but he seemed hell bent on keeping the torment prolonged.

"That's enough!" I screamed loudly, tearing the shorts off and landing, panty clad, against his crutch. "Now I know that you wanted me to pay, but I've paid! I need you now!"

He smiled ruefully and slid his hands along my thighs, before peeling the wet shirt from my body. I smiled at the sudden freeness and pushed Jasper towards the bed head, following soon after.

He managed to shimmy out of his shirt gracefully, leaving the dark blue jeans to me. I skulked forward on all fours, tracing a sharp nail from his collar bone, down the centre of his chest until grasping him fully through his jeans. He jerked against my hand and I realized that he was probably suffering physical pain from his restraints. I zipped the fly down incredibly slowly and managed to remove his pants without ripping them at all.

We were both only in our panties now and my hands moved off their own accord to trace his very tempting hip bones. His blond hair fell down into his eyes as his breathing became low and deliberate.

He pushed me over softly onto my back, every touch of roughness having disappeared. It was no longer purely fuelled by lust, it was fuelled by love and I was overcome with a sudden sadness as I realized that this could be the last time we made love.

"We'll have this again," Jasper whispered out softly, sensing my sudden change in emotion. He brushed my hair behind my ears and kissed me softly.

I held my hands over his shoulders tightly maneuvering my legs around his waist and attempting to peel his underwear off with my toes.

He chuckled at my attempt and used both of his hands to remove mine and his final articles of clothing. I could feel his hardness pressing into my abdomen and I shuffled on the bed, attempting to get him closer to my entrance. I was embarrassingly wet but I personally blamed Jasper for that cause, being far too desirable for his own good.

He moved his lips slowly to mine, slipping his tongue between my lips and kissing me in the very style that I wished the rest of his body would move. He seemed to sense my impatience, because he moved purposefully then, positioning his desire at mine and edging through excruciatingly slowly.

I gasped loudly, clawing my fingers at his shoulders and pushing towards him in an attempt to move him faster. He smiled against my neck and pushed the rest of the way in quickly, hitting the spot of agonizing pleasure.

He groaned against my neck, muttering something about 'tight' and 'love.'

His pace increased dramatically as the spot inside me shuddered in pleasure. I scraped along his skin as he groaned into my skin, grabbing my mouth in his and kissing me deeply.

"No screaming this time.." He whispered breathlessly, the laughter evident in his tone.

I nodded quickly, not completely convinced that I could keep my word. Every time he pulled out slowly, he pushed in deeper than the last time, causing me scream into his mouth in an effort to muffle the sound.

My walls tightened against him and I knew that both he and I were close to the edge.

"I love you so much Bella," He mumbled out quietly, a soft sob catching in his throat.

"We'll have this again.." I said breathlessly, repeating his earlier words.

He smiled happily and spread my legs wider, thrusting deeper than I thought possible. I felt my body rock with the familiar spasms, clamping my walls tightly against Jasper and pulling him over with me.

My back was permanently attached to Jasper's torso as the moan I had been trying to hold in, ripped from me like a siren, blaring through the otherwise silent night.

When we finally came back to earth I felt as if my body was permanently separated from my head. There was a low ringing in my ears as the breathing of Jasper and I attempted to regulate.

For a moment there was nothing in the night but the low murmurs of the family, but then, over the silence of the moon, an earsplitting wolf howl resonated through the night.

**I thought they should get lemony before I finished the story…**

**I'm almost at 700 reviews, please make my day!**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	48. Now it starts?

**Oooooh! We're getting closer!**

**This chapter is dedicated to****_obsessedwithjamespotter,_ because she's been with me since the very first chapter and she always leaves the loveliest reviews. So thank you sweet heart!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 47: Now it starts?

The ear splitting howl trembled through the large house, quaking the bed frame and shaking the deep foundations of the house.

I slapped my hands to my ears quickly, pushing roughly against the skin in an effort to block the hideous noise. Jasper seemed just as put off, if not more so, by the horribly disfiguring sound. He pushed his face against the pillow, ripping it in two and covering the room in a mass of cotton and feathers.

When the howl final ceased, the echoes of the waves still rocked noiselessly through the rooms, shattering the windows and ripping through the jip rock walls. It was like a dog whistle that no one else could hear. A dog whistle that left destruction in it's wake.

It was only then that the realization of what the howl had meant hit me. They were coming. The wolves were here.

I threw myself from Jasper's tangled embrace and ran to the wardrobe, sifting through a thousand piles of clothing. What was I supposed to wear for a battle to the death? Would black be the appropriate color? Would I be burned in it?

As I threw on pair of shorts and a shirt, Jasper rushed in behind me, sifting through his section of the wardrobe and pulling on a pair of jeans and a button up shirt. I didn't even take the time to ogle at his body, too distracted by the prospect of our impending deaths.

_This must be serious_, my mind added thoughtfully, not recalling a time when I had ever passed up the opportunity.

Jasper turned to face me quickly, pulling me into his arms roughly and kissing me more passionately than I thought possible. When his lips finally broke away, he rested his forehead against mine, soft sobs pouring slowly from his open lips.

I took my hands to the sides of his face and gently, but adamantly, forced him to look at me. His eyes swirled with the exact same questions that were rushing through my own head. Every fear, every scrutiny tying to one uncertainty; Would this be the Cullen family's demise?

He kissed me softly and tenderly once more, before pulling away and resting his cheek against mine.

"Meet me downstairs.." He whispered softly, struggling to form the sentence without breaking into hysterics.

I nodded rapidly against his cheek, attempting to convince both Jasper and myself of my certainty in regards to our lives.

He threw me once last pained expression before disappearing through the dismantled door and fading into the shadows.

I stood silently watching after him and for a moment, my body was frozen in shock, overwhelmed by the imminent future. But the moment passed all too quickly, and once again I was overcome with a sheer and disfiguring fear, rendering me blind to my surroundings and completely inadequate to perform any sort of task.

I ripped the small shirt I was wearing from my body, and ran to Jasper's clothing, searching for the item I knew would give me courage.

My hands tore fabric in their haste, eager to rejoin the others downstairs. But when I spotted the familiar blue shirt, everything else in that moment floated away. I was in a simpler time, a time or innocence and inner conflict. I pulled the large blue shirt around my body and breathed in the heady scent. The first time I had worn this shirt had been the first time Jasper had seen me naked. The first time I had realized my feelings for him. The first time I had played twister. As trivial and as inconsequential as it was, the shirt gave me hope. The shirt would get me through.

I ran quickly from the large wardrobe and -in my haste- threw myself into an equally panicky Alice.

She actually screamed when we collided and I realized how much more difficult this entire thing was for Alice than it was for the rest of us. Alice had always been the eyes, the shield, the knowledge for the group. Now she had nothing. She had nothing but herself to offer on the front of war. As ridiculous and as fallacious as the notion was, I knew that a part of Alice would blame herself if any of us were to end today. To become nothing more than memories and ashes.

Alice's chin quivered with her pain as she stared helplessly into my eyes.

I took her hand in mine and squeezed it softly, telling her that I felt it all. Felt exactly how she did; the helplessness, the exposure.

There were no words for this. No words to speak the way we felt.

"We can't die!!" She whimpered softly, her chin now trembling with sobs.

But Alice always had words.

I smiled, possibly for the final time, and walked with her downstairs. The sounds of our feet were low and deliberate. The walk of the condemned. The death march.

I could hear Carlisle's voice far off and I leaned into the noise, comforted by the authoritive presence, the regality of his tone. My father. My peaceful, calming father. How could any body ever want to cause Carlisle harm? Such a generous and truly kind man. A man of better values than almost every human.

In my deluded state, I missed the last step and scattered to the marble floor like a rag doll, skidding across the smooth surface into one of the large pillars.

"What am I human!?" I cried loudly, outraged at the possibility of a clumsy vampire fighting against a herd of wolves.

Emmett gave me a large smile and helped me to my feet, throwing me onto his back and muttering something about "distractions" and "humans."

I threw my arms around his torso and kissed the back of his neck, committing every shape, every scent to my memory.

How would I go on if my lovable big brother wasn't there to tease me? To hunt with me and make giant cardboard castles?

"You okay there human?" He asked laughing, noticing the casual way I sniffed his skin and held him closer.

"Can't I be affectionate?" I asked innocently, contemplating whether or not to rip out some of his hair and pocket it.

His large, booming laughter echoed through the stone home, warming my spirits almost immediately and alerting the wolves of our certain presence.

I wondered if the wolves would take Emmett's laughter as a challenge? Whether they would view his carefree nature as arrogance rather than the plain old 'Emmettness' that it was.

"You all have to stop being quite so morbid!" He cried loudly and throwing an arm around Michal and Rose who were either side of him. "They're a bunch of pound pets! We're **vampires** people, I mean COME ON! They wish they were us!"

I laughed at him once more, sliding smoothly down his alabaster back.

"Pound pets?" Rosalie asked snickering, "Is that really the best we've got? They've got blood suckers! If we want to be intimidating at all, lets stay away from the Tamagotchi pet names."

"Well as entertaining as the friendly banter is…" Edward seethed softly, his arms shaking slightly with frustration. "There's a bunch of wolves waiting outside, that want to tear us limb from limb. And this is it! This is all that we have, no one's coming to save us, no one is coming to protect us. The Volturi want us dead, Denali won't have anything to do with us after what happened with Michal, this will not be a happy ending! Some of us may die!"

Caterina put a hand on his shoulder, shaking her head softly at the harshness of his words.

An eerie silence settled over the family as the extent of what Edward had said set in. I almost wanted to shout out at him for lacking so much tact, but the other half of me knew that he spoke the truth. Who would leave us today? Who would leave this family a broken figure? A family that would have been but a shadow of it's original form. I wanted to believe that none of us would die, but optimism had not proven me fortunate in past experiences, and so, I was aiming for more of a melancholy spirit. Something that could not disappoint.

Edward's head snapped to the patio abruptly, and his eyes turned into dangerous slits.

"They're here…" He said slowly, his voice drenched in an indescribable fury. "Jacob is shouting to me in his head… He's given me directions to a clearing…"

Edward released a low and dangerous snarl, his top lip all but disappearing behind his venomous teeth.

"He's having fun.." He seethed out angrily, "It's all a big game to him.."

"Can you see how many there are?" Carlisle asked quickly, calculating some unknown figures in his head.

Edward's lips shuddered rapidly as he mumbled the numbers as he counted.

"There's thirteen.." He said slowly, checking over the numbers once more. "But I only recognize about six or seven of them. The others are new recruits."

"Thirteen!" Emmett boomed excitedly, "That's easy! We've got ten on us, this will be easy!"

I smiled at Emmett's confidence, wondering vaguely why they hadn't brought more. Had the other's not wanted to attack? Had they been against Jacob's kamikaze mission? I had always quite like the wolves, I like to think that they had felt the same about me. Especially the younger ones… especially…"

"Is Seth there!?" I shouted at Edward, a deep midst of fear setting over me. I prayed to god he wasn't. Seth had always been so calm, so childlike. To see him at the mercy of a vampire, a vampire from **my** family, would be beyond cruel. Beyond any pain that a werewolf could bestow me.

"It's okay Bella," Edward soothed quietly, "He's not there."

I sighed contentedly and felt some of the panic begin to leave my body. I could take comfort in that. I would be happy knowing that Seth had not betrayed us. That his life would not be taken by one of my family.

Edward's emotions seemed to mirror my own pretty closely and I knew that he was happy knowing Seth would not be in danger. Towards the time of the wedding, Seth had began to idolize Edward somewhat, and as much as Edward denied any affection for the young wolf, I knew that a part of him cared deeply for Seth. A good friend. A younger brother.

"We should go.." Jasper said slowly, taking my hand in his.

I nodded silently, unaware of where we were actually headed.

"I'll lead," Edward said softly, noticing that none of us were daring to move.

Carlisle mouthed him thanks and swept Esme into his arms, following closely as Edward darted like a bullet from the patio and into the surrounding forest.

Rose, Alice and Michal went next, followed by Caterina and Emmett.

"Alone once more…" Jasper said softly, walking me slowly past the large fountain.

"But not for the last time.."

"No," He said faintly, picking up his pace. "Certainly not the last time."

We stopped speaking then. There was nothing else we could say to placate the others worries. Because as terrible and as off-putting as the worries were, they were worries that could quite possibly come true.

Our pace quickened again until we were flying silently through the forest, whipping past the trees at incomprehensible paces and never leaving a footmark behind us. The rest of the family swayed silently ahead, none of them uttering a word to each other, only bathing in the presence of one another and the radiance each member gave off.

I could see a large break in the dense forest ahead and I knew that we were close. So close. So very close to bloodshed.

As the tree's thinned, the sky loomed larger overhead, the tiny sliver of moon light poured delicately through the open expanse.

It was then that I smelt them. Raw. Filthy. Rotten. Wolf. Thirteen large wolves hunched dangerously at the other end of the clearing.

The large wolf's eyes in the centre, sparkled with excitement. A happiness that could only fit the demeanor of a creature so inhumanly cruel, that I shuddered at the mere sight of his dirty coat.

Jacob Black.

His mouth hung open in a sloppy smile and in that moment the universe shifted.

I stared into the eyes of the brown russet wolf and I wasn't fearful anymore. I wasn't panicked.

I was enraged.

**Okay, before you kill me, let me explain something. I had to have this separate from the fight because I want to write an entire chapter solely on the fight scene (the next chapter.) So I needed them to get this sentimental crap over before the bloodshed lol!**

**I absolutely cannot update tomorrow. Maybe not even the next day. The next chapter is going to be incredibly difficult for me to write, (only I know what happens Hahaha)**

**But hang in there! It'll be over soon!**

**And not to sound like a horrible manipulative black mailer, but reviews do provide plenty of motivation!**

**But I love you all anyway, even without reviews! Just the fact that you read it this far, that you stuck with me :)**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	49. Pain

**Say hello to the chapter of pain!**

**Both physical and emotional… This is like the opposite of the Breaking Dawn fight (or lack of) So enjoy! Hehehe**

**There's a reference to chapter 4: Filthy Beautiful in this chapter. It might be good to go back and just re-read the section from when she's alone in the forest, to where Jasper comes. You don't have to, you'll still understand the reference, it'll just make more sense if you do.**

**P.S I listened to Regina Spektor's "The Call" over and over while writing this. There are certain aspects of the lyrics which fit Bella's feelings perfectly.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 48: Pain

_Jacob's mouth hung open in a sloppy smile and in that moment, the universe shifted._

_I stared into the eyes of the brown russet wolf and I wasn't fearful anymore. I wasn't panicked._

_I was enraged._

His large, dark pupils reflected the anger I knew ran deep through my veins. An anger that could only be quenched by the death of the large brown wolf. After all, he had caused sufficient pain for us all in his life, it was about time he received some in return. Pain for pain. Blood for blood.

"He want's to talk you," Edward said softly, breaking the hard silence that had set in.

"I have nothing to say to him," I replied harshly, stepping back from the looming line of large wolves. "Nor do I intend to hear anything he has to say… It's time for him to face the consequences of his actions."

A low, guttural growl rolled through Jacob's mutt-mouth, blowing the hair around my face in a filthy breeze.

An odd feeling swept over me and I recognized it immediately. I had experienced the same feeling so many times now, that I'd lost count of the amount of times it had overcome me. The feeling before the big fight, before the war. A strange mixture between fear, power and loss. So much had changed in the past four years and yet here I was again. Back to the beginning… I had come full circle.

Edward chuckled softly, a sound completely out of context in the present situation.

"He's yelling out quite a number of profanities in his head," Edward informed us quietly. "There's actually a few words there that I've never even heard of."

The interjected humor of the moment was quick and unrewarding, not lessening the fear of death in any of us.

A large, sheer black wolf beside Jacob shuffled impatiently on his hind legs, his muzzle scrunched into an angry grimace. He was taller than the rest, yet his posture was cowered somewhat in comparison to that of Jacobs.

_Sam…_ my mind informed me, recalling dozens of past experiences with the pack leader.

_But if he were the pack leader,_ I continued internally. _Then why is he positioned as if he is merely second in rank?_

_A trick? A diversion?_ I offered mentally, wanting the inner debate to cease. Or was the truth of it that Jacob really **was** leader now? Did he have some sort of ancient authority over the others that Sam did not? Did he wield power and control?

Before I could contemplate the thoughts further, I was distracted by the presence of something other than the wolves and my family. A new scent drifted through the air mixed with a feeling of fear and regret. The scent was not unappealing to me, but several of the wolves cowered away from the fresh odor… The sweet and vaguely familiar odor.

"Oh good, you didn't start without us!" Came a soft voice from beneath the shadows of the trees. The voice was familiar and warming, and as the sound rang out between the forest I felt my body change with a new sense of hope. A sense of survival.

Carmen stepped out from beneath the large canopy, Eleazar followed close behind. Tanya and Kate slipped out next, standing strong and fierce next to their family, their hands clenched into fists of rage by their sides. Finally, Irina revealed her small form from behind the others, her eye's set into angry slits as she searched the open expanse for Michal.

"I have to apologize for my sisters," Carmen continued, walking slowly to meet my inspecting family. "They can be awfully foolish sometimes. Fortunately, their only real vendetta against you all was that minor little incident between Irina and Michal. However, once I explained to Irina that she had the opportunity to shed blood from the wolves who took her dear Laurent, she was all too happy to join in the fight."

My heart was soaring. So much so, that I wasn't even listening anymore as the others mumbled out their apologies. The figures were now thirteen to fifteen, wolves to vampires. We had help. We could win.

Several of the observing wolves looked skittish from the recent additions, many of them backing up slowly as if contemplating to just skip out.

I smiled smugly at the obvious advantage we had, no longer paralyzed by my fear. Jacob's face was distorted into an expression of pure anger and I took a step closer to him, provoking his delicate control.

He ripped out a fierce, feral growl and snapped ferociously at my face.

"This is what you wanted…" I whispered out softly, staring him straight in his dark, livid eyes.

The wolves on the opposing side each stood on their hind legs, howling wildly towards the small fraction of the moon. The vampires on my side hissed and snarled at the raw noise, baring their teeth in fierce scowls.

And so it began.

Each side ran at each other violently, colliding in an upsurge of stone-marble skin and dark, coarse hair.

I leapt at Jacob's offensive stance, soaring effortlessly through the still night. His face smirked softly and a large russet paw made contact with my body, throwing me into a large tree. The tree immediately snapped into hundreds of splinters, scattering around the clearing like woodchips.

I jumped up quickly, not hurt in the slightest from the impact. Jacob cocked his head to the left, inviting me to take another swing.

I watched as the rest of my family and the Denali Clan fought diligently with the rival wolves. Jasper jumped swiftly from tree to tree, disorienting his opponent before going in for once large traumatic beat to the head, knocking them out but not killing them.

_He doesn't want to kill them.._ My mind informed me quietly. I smiled at the goodness in his heart and Jacob leapt aggressively at me, upset by my apparent happiness over the situation.

However, this time it was me that was in control of the situation, not Jacob. His sharp talons of claws came soaring dangerously through the air, aiming directly for my face. I stepped ten inches to the left and swung my leg around violently to hit him square in the face.

A low yelp resonated through the night as Jacob went sprawling to the ground. There were thick splatters of blood on my leg and I realized that the impact of my force must have cut Jacob's face deeply.

"Down Bella!" Alice screamed loudly, drawing my attention to Jared's bulky brown wolf form that was running furiously towards me.

My mind told me what action I could take, but my body was indecisive, causing Jared's teeth to meet with my stomach in a painfully deep slice. Venom pooled from the cut, soaking through the blue shirt and dissolving some of the fabric.

Jacob jumped up from his temporary fall and closed in behind me, leaving me trapped between both him and Jared.

I searched anxiously for someone that could help me, but I found no one available. Alice was yelling a list of profanities while beating furiously at a smaller mahogany colored wolf that continued to snap brutally at her arms and legs.

Jared's body coiled like a spring while Jacob's claws scratched and swung at me. I tried to think of something, anything I could do to dissuade one of them, but I knew that my attempts would simply spur them on.

Caterina flew through the air like a savior, jumping on Jared's exposed back and slicing her nails over his body as he yelped and staggered away in pain.

"Damn Italy!" I applauded her laughing, "That's some skill you've got there!"

Jacob growled angrily behind me, taking a fresh vengeance against Caterina.

"Go and help the others!" She demanded, holding Jacob's lethal teeth at an arms distance. "Go! I'll handle this.."

I nodded swiftly and moved to rejoin the fight. Everywhere, separate struggles and brawls raged on, swings of blood and fury continuing effortlessly as the night drew on.

I moved to help Michal with his fight, but a shrill scream of agony stilled my steps and ripped my attention to the scent of a fire. The flames smelt sweet and tangy, fresh life being poured across the blaze.

"NO!" Edward bellowed loudly as three wolves ripped apart stone flesh, throwing the pieces into the inferno.

It felt as if my mind would dribble from my ears. Some had died. Not a wolf, but one of us. I ran forward desperately, my movements deeply slurred from the sobs that flew from my mouth like loud, angry sirens.

Edward pulled me back when I reached the fire, but I thrashed violently against his strong grip.

Who was it!? Who had they taken from me!?

It was then that I saw smolders of her strawberry blond hair, burning rapidly in the blaze.

"No, no, no, NOO!" Kate was screaming wildly as she ran forward at one of the three culprits, landing roughly beside the large wolf and ripping it's head off in one violent twist.

The deep, red blood splashed across the field and all across Kate's body. But even still, she tore at the mangled corpse, beating her hands across the large wolfs torso and chucking bits at the fire.

Eleazar and Rose stepped behind her, yanking her from the wolf's remains and holding her well away from the fire that threatened to consume her.

She had only come to help. She had come when she had no involvement in the fight whatsoever. And now she was gone. Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust.

My body willed to crumble with sadness, but I pushed on, re-immersing myself into the fight and taking the anger out on the large grey wolf beside me. Emmett, Carlisle and Esme fought off the third wolf that had led to Tanya's demise, circling it till the edge of the forest where it took off, running hastily from certain death.

The grey wolf ahead of me swiped at my face, causing shallow cuts to form on my neck and cheeks. I hissed back and snapped viciously at his legs and neck.

"BELLA! MOVE, NOW BELLA!" Jasper was screaming loudly to me, his face fixed into a distorted expression of painful sadness.

And then time moved much deliberate than usual. It was as if everything moved incredibly slowly, but much too quickly.

I watched as Sam's dark, burly form ran swiftly at me, his dagger-filled mouth frothing slightly with anger. I threw the grey wolf beside me into the forest, bracing myself for the impact of Sam's teeth.

This was it. My ultimatum. Act now and try to save myself or fight back and take him down with me.

I looked into the eyes of beast before me and prepared to meet him head on. I wanted to do this. It was my fight.

But apparently Jasper didn't think so.

A blond blur of fury danced lethally across the field towards me, grabbing fists of Sam's sheer black fur as leverage and slicing his teeth across the neck of the beast.

The large black wolf quivered for a moment, while the life blood ebbed onto the open field. Then he lay still. Cold. Lifeless.

Jasper looked up towards me with pained eyes.

"I'm sorry.. I didn't want to… But he-"

And then life as I knew it ended.

Not mine… but his. My everything. My life.

Jacob was there before any action could be taken at all. He let out a raw, throaty snarl and swiped one large, sharp claw across Jasper's throat… leaving him in two.

I watched as Jasper's head rolled to the floor, venom pooling to the field like corrosive acid, burning through the grass in obscure patterns.

My heart shattered into a thousand separate pieces. The pieces then turned to dust. The dust then caught alight and ripped a fiery vengeance through the very depth of my soul.

It was over, they had won. I didn't care anymore. If everyone else still survived we would still have lost. We would still have lost everything.

I wanted death.

I wanted to death for me… But more than anything else in the world, I wanted death for Jacob Black.

I threw my head back and screamed louder than a thousand wolf cries. The ground beneath me shuddered violently as I felt a new strength coarse through me, a powerful and lethal strength.

I could hear Carlisle crying out loudly towards me, but I didn't care. He could scream all he wanted to and I would never heed his words of warning. Never listen. Never come back.

Edward screamed loudly to Alice, "Get the pieces, get them now!"

But non of it mattered. It was as if I were watching a horror movie on mute. The action raged by beside me but I could hear none of it. Every action, every scream of terror didn't reach my ears. I had one task and one objective; Kill Jacob.

I crossed the field in front of me, never breaking stride in my march of vengeful bereavement. Why couldn't he have taken my life? Why not decapitate me?

My body lurched forward painfully as the sobs raked my body. My existence was over. Everything was over.

I was only one meter from him now. The hate I felt boiled under my skin as I stilled in front of him.

The wolf in front of me smiled. He smiled and I lost it.

The venom in my mouth ten folded, a mixture between my thirst and anger. I hadn't hunted in a few days and the scorch spurred me on, igniting more anger within its flames.

I spat the quantity in his face and threw my fists at him, tearing at flesh and bone. He yelped painfully ahead of me, clawing at my arms but not fighting with the strength I knew he had.

"FIGHT ME!" I yelled angrily, my sobs making my fighting sloppy. "FIGHT ME YOU MONSTER!"

His mouth twisted into a sick smile, before his body shuddered and shook, transforming into the beaten shape of his human form.

I held the fist I had clenched in mid strike, the bones quivering with the ferocity of my abuse.

"Don't… st… stop now… Bells…" He mumbled out, his voice choking on his own blood.

I looked down at his beaten, bloodied face, but what stared back was what I least expected to see. Even though he was stripped bare, beaten to a pulp and hovering between the brink of death, there was no fear, no anger, no determination. He was just…

"Do.. It…" He spluttered out, spraying blood on my feet.

…hopeful.

"Do it Bella! Finish me!" Soft tears began to run down his face, mixing with the blood and leaving fresh trails of clean skin down his face.

He **wanted** to die.

My fists fell limp beside my body and I slumped to the ground beneath me.

"You wanted to die…" I said slowly, realization sinking in. "That's what this is all about… you wanted to die and you were too much of a coward to do it yourself."

"Whimper your woes to your dead lover!" He spat icily, provoking me further.

I backhanded him across the face, making him laugh in joy. Fresh blood poured from the gash on his face, pooling into the dirt.

"That's …my girl…" He stuttered out, "You.. You.. Know you want to.."

I whimpered softly and scooted away from him. I would not give into him. I would not give him what he longed for.

I crawled away in the dirt, new sobs breaking through. If I had killed him when he first came, if I killed him when I had the opportunity, I could have prevented this all. Jasper would still…

I looked out to the horror in front of me and the mute button turned off. All the sorrow and the sadness wrecked through my body; the noise, the emotions, the sights. Irina and Kate sobbed together by the fire while their sister burned in the flames. Carlisle and Emmett gathered pieces of wolf and started a fresh fire, destroying the evidence, committing them to the blaze.

The wolves had departed… or who ever was left. Most of them had been massacred in the fight. Whoever had been cunning enough to survive had run like a coward. Or was the word hero? To the other wolves they would surely be thought of as that… the heroes, the champions.

Alice, Esme and Rose were not here.

And Jasper…

I suddenly understood Edward's suicidal tendencies. Is this what he had felt? What he had dealed with? If so, then I had a new found respect for him… because what I needed now more than anything was rest. The only type of rest that could be achieved through death.

"B..Bella.."

Jacob was dragging himself across the dirt behind me, his legs limp with pain.

"End it… end me and end your suffering.."

I stared at him disgusted. He truly had no idea what Jasper meant to me, what I was going through.

"Nothing that I could do to you would **ever** end my suffering…" I spat out, moving to stand above him. "I hate you more than I can possibly tell you.. And that's exactly why I will not kill you! Death is rest, it's peace. You don't deserve death!"

There was no more hope in his face, now he was blank. He was blank and empty. He new there was nothing now, no rest, no deliverance.

"Drown yourself, shoot your brains out, do what ever the hell you want! But don't you ever ask me to be your death angel… And I swear to you.. If I ever hear your voice again, see you anywhere.. I will make you feel **exactly** what I'm feeling now!" I bent down to stare him in the eyes, "Comprehend?"

For the first time that night, I saw the thing I so desperately wanted to see cross his face; Fear.

I stumbled back from him, sloshing my steps through the blood and dirt.

What did I do? Where did I go now?

I had nothing… I had no one…

"Bella?" I realized Edward was once again talking to me, but I couldn't answer him, I couldn't even speak.

"Bella go home…"

I looked hopelessly from his troubled eyes to Carlisle's caring face. Where was home? Home had been where Jasper was… where Jasper is…

"Go home," He repeated, his tone slightly angrier. "There's nothing for you here.."

I nodded slowly and stumbled off into the forest, fumbling through trees and mud.

"There's nothing for me anywhere…" I whispered once I was alone, slumping down amongst the mud and sinking into the ground.

I began to think that maybe if I stayed here forever, I would eventually forget. But I knew I would not. I would never forget his face, the way his eyes stared sorrowfully at me, upset for killing that scum… Why did he have to be such hero? I hated that he was so good! I hated that he always wanted to help!

I hated him!

"I HATE YOU!" I screamed it into the night, aiming the words towards the sky.

Jasper was in heaven. I had no doubt that someone so good belonged any where else following death. No one deserved the title of angel like he did… no one was so pure, so true in spirit.

"Why…" I mumbled out, holding back the wave of agony that threatened to gush out in sobs. "Why do you make me hate you like this?"

I hated everything right now… I hated being like this and Alice… Alice could see it all.

I remembered another time when I had received this epiphany before. The first time Jasper had left me. Right after my first hunt…

I laughed dryly to myself, I had been so in love with him and I had refused to acknowledge it. I didn't want Alice to see how upset I was, so I had put the shield up… But then he had turned up anyway… He'd been so sweet and he'd said..

"I'm so sorry for leaving. Can you ever forgive me?"

I was shocked by the clarity of the memory, impressed by the way I had so perfectly preserved the voice. But then again, I had a history of perfectly memorizing my past loves in traumatic times.

"Bella?"

The memory continued, and yet I did not recall this moment at all?

"Bella honey?"

Perhaps I was envisioning the memory in a way that I wanted it to go. But I couldn't understand why? The way the actual event had played out had been beautiful…

I rolled over softly in the mud and in that moment I knew I had final lost the final straw of my sanity.

Jasper smiled shyly at me, skulking over to sit down next to me. His face was so distorted by sadness that I was upset with myself for remembering only the distraught moment of his life.

"Be..Bella?" A soft sob ripped from his throat and I took my hand to the base of his throat, stroking the skin. There was no scar.

I sighed softly, "You're not real…"

His face turned from utter sadness to complete confusion.

"Bella, I'm so sorry you had to witness that, I know it must have been horrible but…"

"I have an impressive mind.." I mumbled quietly, resting my head in my lap. "You're very cunning for a memory.."

"Bella I'm not a memory!"

The beautiful figment of my imagination was angry now.. He had many levels for someone so unreal.

"Of course you are.." I muttered dismissively, "If you were real you'd be holding your head in your hands right now.."

"Bella!" Now he was laughing slightly, pushing his hand through his hair. This chimera had a lot of Jasper-like gestures. "You know that won't kill a vampire, ripping us up is only the first step!"

I wanted to believe the figment so badly, but I knew it would hurt more in the end.

"You would have a scar!" I cried back irritably, "There would be a scar where you were de..dec..apitated.."

It hurt me to say the words, it ripped open the wounds once more and a loud sob tore from my throat, echoing through the forest loudly.

The Jasper illusion took me in his arms, laughing all the while kissing my forehead.

"Edward wasn't kidding when he said you had trouble accepting things…"

I shook away from him, staring him in the eyes.

"There's no scar.." I said once more, always stubborn… always tenacious.

"There's no scar because there was no intruding vampire venom… remember? Only another vampire can leave a scar!"

A past memory tugged at my mind, but I shook it away, dismissing his words.

"Check your own battle scars!" He cried irritably, yanking away the scorched fabric covering my torso.

"Hey!" I said angrily, growing impatient with the delusion.

But there it was.. Or rather, there it **wasn't.** There was no scar where Jared had torn through my skin. No small incision, not any proof at all that I had been broken.

"Jasper?" I asked softly, a sob catching in my throat. I wanted to cry, I wanted release.

He looked at me softly and smiled weakly, nodding his head.

"It's not that easy to get rid of me, as much as you might-"

But I didn't let him finish, I grabbed him roughly and melded my lips to his, sobbing against the marble skin.

"…I …thought I'd.. lost.. You.." I whimpered out, shaking uncontrollably as everything I pushed back came ripping out from the seams.

"Why did you even do that!" I cried angrily, hitting him violently on the chest. "You're so stupid sometimes! You're so stupid I just want to strangle you! I just want to-"

But this time it was **I** who was not permitted to finish my sentence. Jasper intertwined his fingers through my hair, securing my face to his and kissing all the pain away. My emotions had dealt with too much today. If Jasper's mere presence wasn't enough to hold me in this moment forever, I was sure that I would have passed out from sheer emotional overload.

When he released me from his lips once more, I didn't dare let him go. I pushed him down onto his back and slumped onto his chest, running my hands up his neck and into his hair.

So much had been lost today… so many lives… so many families broken apart.

But still, our losses had not been complete…

We lay together in the mud for hours, not speaking, not moving, not even breathing.

At some point sunrise occurred, drenching the forest in fresh light. The fires had long burnt out, dwindled to nothing but ash and embers.

Old ashes, new life. It seemed to be the pattern of my life…

"So I guess… we won…" Jasper said softly, sitting up and holding me in his lap.

"We didn't win.." I replied quietly, "Everyone lost… There is no winning in death."

And that was the truth of it. You could say we had won, you could say we had lost… but that wasn't what mattered anymore, and finally, after many long years, I understood that.

Win, lose, fight, flight… none of it meant anything.

You needed strength.

The kind of strength to get through the fight, through the pain. It was about surviving…

It was all about life.

**Oh sweet mother of god I'm tired…**

**Oh, and before you ask; No. This is not the end of the story… yet!**

**Be gentle!**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	50. Recovery

**Last chapter before the epilogue! **

**sniffs It's so sad : ( I realize that I could continue with a sequel, I mean there is so much more to say, but it's time to start anew. Time to put this story to rest.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Chapter 49: Recovery

Everything had changed, it was all so… different.

I could feel every fiber in the air, twisting and wriggling, acclimatizing themselves to the fresh circumstances.

It was calm, Quiet… But was it peaceful?

Was the tranquility and the silence an omen of peace? Or was it simply the eye of the storm? Would this be our final act of violence?

Surely not.

It seemed as though violence was an inevitability for this family, as if we were doomed to fight battles for the rest of our lives.

"You're confused…" Jasper said faintly, taking my hand in his.

I nodded softly, not really wishing to elaborate on my feelings at the present moment.

"Me too.." He whispered quietly.

I looked up to meet his eyes and he was smiling sympathetically, his face bathed in a soft morning light.

I brushed my hand along the smooth, alabaster skin of his cheek, stroking the marble stone texture while he closed his eyes and breathed in deeply.

"I'm trying to rationalize it…" He continued quietly, leaning into my touch. "I'm trying to understand why, or how, this all happened. I could say that it was it was simply the triumph of good over evil, but…"

"They weren't the evil." I finished resolutely, "They were misguided and angry, but they weren't evil."

"Yes…" He replied hoarsely, rubbing a pale hand over his eyes and then over his mouth, staring of contemplatively. "The weather is changing…"

"Makes sense," I said faintly, "Everything else did…"

He laughed softly, holding me closer by my waist.

"I meant the season…" He whispered, chuckling deeply, "Winter's coming round quickly. I thought we'd have at least a month more of autumn, but I guess Seldovia never really was a weather reliant town."

This statement puzzled me. Winter only started in December, surely that wasn't any time soon. After all, it had only been…

I froze in my tracks, attempting to count back the weeks since my change. But I was empty, my mind blank. I had no idea how much time had passed. I knew light and dark, sun and stars, rain and snow, but I had absolutely no idea what day, week or even month it was. I could remember the wedding on the thirteenth of August, staying in France for a month -For which Edward was ecstatic as it meant I was technically nineteen when I was changed- But then everything after late September, I couldn't put a date to an event.

"It's November the twenty-sixth," Jasper informed me quietly, noticing my internal struggle.

I gasped loudly and threw a hand to my mouth. I couldn't believe it, I wouldn't. How could time have passed so quickly without my knowledge?

"I gather from that charming expression, that you thought it was earlier?"

I nodded slowly, flipping through my mental calendar. But there was nothing, just a big blank between late September and today.

I stared incredulously at Jasper, face scrunched together in a state of confusion. "Aren't you vampire's always complaining about how eternity takes forever?"

He released a low, throaty laugh, ruffling my presently disheveled hair and punching me lightly on the shoulder.

"For a newborn vampire, you remember an awful lot of insignificant details.."

"Lucky me," I replied disinterestedly, watching as the dark rain clouds loomed over the sky.

A moment of silence past as we walked quietly back towards the house. Even our footsteps seemed unusually quiet, dancing gracefully over roots and mud, never making a single slosh or crunch beneath our toes.

"What happens now?" I asked quietly, when the large stone house came into view.

Jasper sighed loudly and shrugged his shoulders, looping a hand around my waist.

"I don't know… Pack up, move on? Break apart, stick together? Choices don't mean what they used to.."

We didn't say anything else, we just bathed in the silence, the peace of the moment. It was the moment I imagined people felt post-war, the white flag silence, the moment that you knew it was over… finished.

We walked through the front door of the lobby, into a house of morose mourning.

As soon as the atmosphere hit me, I knew that some other ill-fated event had occurred. There was something other than the achy pain of death, a pain of loss and confliction.

My pace increased with my breathing as I raced around the corner of the stairs, desperate to find the cause of the emotion.

And there they were. The _leftovers_, the ones who had survived. I moved towards the patio, watching as they sat in near silence, murmuring soft words to each other.

Edward.

Alice.

Michal.

Rose.

Emmett.

Caterina.

Carlisle.

Esme.

Eleazar.

Carmen.

…Family.

But my mind soon connected the dots, watching as the drawing formed an incomplete star around the vampires sitting beaten and damaged on the patio tiles.

Where was Irina and Kate? Where were the other sisters of the Denali clan?

A horrible thought occurred to me and I shivered slightly at the entrance, wishing that it was not true. They had been sitting so close to the fire, sobbing at the lips of the flames… what if? I prayed it wasn't true. I prayed that suicide was not the way their minds were wired. But even so… I had to know.

I pushed past the large, glass doors and sprang into the patio, skidding over the moist floor.

Alice glanced up briefly to watch me, smiling at my rushed attitude.

But it wasn't funny. Something was wrong.

Carmen's head was resting softly on Eleazar's shoulder, her face pulled into a painful grimace. The combination of their emotions were crippling, they had lost so much through Tanya, I hated the fact that they had to suffer further.

"…They're gone.." I whispered softly, reading the answer in Eleazar's eyes.

He nodded his head slowly, a quiet soft strangling in his throat.

My body shuddered and collapsed beneath the weight of my emotions. I watched as the hard tiles loomed closer in my eyesight, promising immediate impact.

But it never came. And I should have expected that. What I didn't expect, was who would do the saving; It wasn't Jasper, nor was it Edward.

I saved myself.

My hands pushed out when I was not three centimeters from collision, pushing roughly through the tiles. I had been a vampire for months now, and that was the first time I had ever truly rescued myself from such a trivial thing such as falling. I was proud.

"You okay Bella?" Carmen asked quietly, her voice strained by no doubt her onslaught of sobs.

I nodded rapidly, not wishing to be the object of attention when something so ghastly had occurred else where.

"I'm so sorry.." I whispered, my voice raw with conviction.

Carmen squeezed Eleazar's hand and they both uttered words of thanks.

"I just wish we knew where…" Eleazar mumbled faintly, "Where do they think they'll find sanctuary?"

My eyebrows pulled together as I mulled over his words. Everyone else in the family look exhausted, drained from the battle, but not upset the way I imagined they would be, unless…

"They're not dead?" I asked slowly, matching the pieces together in my head.

Carmen stared at me shocked, her mouth agape in a stunned expression.

"No, heavens no!" She said quickly, holding a hand over her still heart. "If they too had perished in the flames, I don't know how I.. I mean…"

She threw her head against Eleazar's chest, muffling her cries into the torn fabric of his red shirt.

"They left," Eleazar informed me, stroking a hand along Carmen's back. "We came back here when Jasper was hurt, they stayed by the fire. We were all hurt because of Tanya's death, our family had been torn apart. But I never expected them to just… take off like that. Abandon Carmen and I as if the time we had been a family meant nothing."

Carmen pulled back from Eleazar and stroked her hand along his face, comforting his angered aura.

"I don't think they ever meant for it to be abandonment," She said softly, kissing the base of his throat. "But they were together for centuries before we joined them. They thought of each other as biological sisters, blood ties."

Eleazar closed his eyes and breathed softly against Carmen's cool flesh.

"Where will you go now?" I asked quietly, horrified by the idea of them sitting alone in the large, empty house.

"I don't know.." Carmen said honestly, "Where is home now? Home is with family and now they are gone… and we have no home."

Esme left Carlisle's arms and danced over to sit at the base of the couple's feet.

"Your home is here then.." She said decisively, resting her head against Carmen's knees. "If home is where family is, then your home is surely where we are."

"Esme, you are quite dear," She replied softly, her eyes filled with gratitude. "But your family is so large already, I would hate to make things uncomfortable."

"Nonsense," Carlisle interjected, moving to join Esme's ambush. "You have always been a part of our family anyway, It's about time you moved in.."

Eleazar stood from his perch next to Carmen and extended a long, pale hand to Carlisle.

Carlisle stared incredulously at the hand, his face mixed with confusion as he stared at the gesture.

"If you're going to be a Cullen, you should know that we only greet each other through very expressive grasps and hugs."

Eleazar laughed softly, and once again, a quiet sob ripped from his throat.

"Thank you…"

Carlisle smiled largely and pulled him into a tight grip, patting him roughly on the back as if to reaffirm the masculinity of the moment.

Esme took Carmen into her arms as if she were a new born child, cradling her softly in her arms and breathing quietly into her hair.

"I'm so sorry for your loss Carmen.." Esme whispered faintly, holding her newest daughter closer to her.

I smiled tenderly at the new comers to our family and watched as the others slowly stood, welcoming each in the way that families welcomed estranged members.

We were a coven of twelve now. A sure threat to the Volturi.

A part of me knew that fresh conflict would arise because of it. I knew that they would arrive, dark shadows in the night bringing new battles here. Into my home and into my family.

But for the first time in my entire existence, it didn't matter any more.

They would come prepared with armies, weapons and skills beyond measure. They would come and rage a war against the threat. They would come and start a battle that would surely never be forgotten…

But they would never win.

They would never break apart the family they so surely despised. Because despite our broken pasts, our shattered presents and our uncertain futures, we would heal again. We would heal and become once again, friends that embodied something more than just love. More than hope and more than peace.

We would be a family again.

And as I stared into the golden eyes of the man I so dearly loved, I knew that that that was everything that I could ever want.

And more than anything that I could ever need.

**Still an epilogue!**

**Can anyone guess what the epilogue is sort of based around? I've known for ages what it was going to be lol! Big hint in chapter 19: 'Truth.' HUGE, ASTRONOMICAL hint! Hahahahahaha!**

**As I said, this story has so many future possiblitlites, and maybe after some time I will come back and write a sequel. Not all hope is lost lol ****J**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	51. Epilogue

**The final chapter… (Sobs uncontrollably)**

**Yes, well… I'll just blab on at the end of this chapter. I'll just be saying thanks and talking about the new story ideas.**

**This epilogue is a bit of fluff which basically just explains how things have progressed since the war and then how they've grown as a family. For those of you who didn't guess the clue from chapter 19, this epilogue is based around the vision Alice had which led her to find out about Bella and Jasper. So Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight**

Epilogue

The soft patter or rain outside grew into a peaceful beat over the windows, rolling delicately down the sheet glass and dripping noiselessly to the ground.

I pressed my nose against the smooth surface and stared out as a bloodied Michal and Alice came prancing in through the forest, their faces fixed in permanent smiles.

My own smile grew as I watched Michal swoop Alice into his arms, dipping her deeply and kissing her passionately on the mouth.

One month had passed since the war of the wolves, exactly one month. It seemed like such an incredibly short period of time when I thought back on it, and yet in other ways, it seemed as if it had been the longest month of my life. So much had changed that it seemed foolish to give the events the recent dates that they had earned.

Carmen and Eleazar had adapted to the family well, fitting into the coven as if they had been apart of it for years. Alice glimpsed clips of Kate and Irina every now and again, but their decisions changed so rapidly that the glimpses she got were always vague and indefinite. The fact of the matter was; They didn't want to be found.

Alice had blamed herself at the beginning, frustrated with lack of information she was receiving and delved into solitary hours for searching her mind. But Eleazar had soon placated her, promising that Carmen and himself were much happier here anyway.

_Oh Alice…_ My mind sighed inwardly, laughing at how fate had favored her spirit.

When the beginning of my new life had started, I had never expected that things would have worked out for Alice the way I always dreamed they would. She had a man who loved her more than life, and a future with him set in stone. They had hidden their relationship for a week after the war, worried that it might fall apart or cause rifts between Edward and her. Though Edward had acted surly for days after it, he had soon given into Alice's quirky charm and good nature, promising to support the relationship as long as it lasted.

I'm not sure if Edward believed it was simply a fling or some sort of rebound after the devastation she had suffered following Jasper, but every doubt that anyone had harbored about the fresh couple had been silenced last week when Alice had proposed.

They had been together for twenty-four days. Twenty-four days of blissful happiness when Alice had popped the question. It was so like Alice to break the traditional male proposing to female custom, that you couldn't help but admire the fortitude and love behind her actions. Michal had been ecstatic, breaking into sobs and swearing that he had been thinking the same thing since our first visit to Denali.

I felt two strong arms link around my waist as Jasper stepped behind me, resting his chin on my shoulder and breathing softly against the back of my neck. I shivered against the sensation and spun quickly in his arms to tie my hands behind his neck.

"Merry Christmas," He whispered softly, tilting his head at a slight angle as if to gauge my reaction to his proposition of kissing me.

I laughed at his gentlemanly manner and leant in quickly, kissing chaste butterfly pecks across his neck and lips.

"I guess you can take the boy out of the South, but you can never take the southern tendencies out of the boy.."

He scoffed softly, moving his hands towards my hips and pulling me roughly against him, kissing ever ounce of strength from my lips.

"I beg to differ," He whispered tantalizingly, gyrating against my hips slightly as he kissed a trail of fiery passion across my neck.

"And what a Merry Christmas it is," I said laughing and leaning my body back as my hair swept across the marble floor.

Privacy was a rarity for a family so large, so truthfully, I should have expected the event that followed next. Emmett came bounding through the door with an equally excited Caterina in hand, laughing wildly about a store clerk's attitude. Their laughter tones were so different and yet they complimented each other like a well rehearsed tune, harmonizing one another perfectly.

Reluctantly, Jasper pulled his lips away from my skin, pushing his hand into my back jean pocket instead and mumbling the words "solitude" and "intrusion" repeatedly.

"We've got a whole range of movies full of Christmas fun," Caterina boasted happily, shaking her long wet hair across the lobby floor.

Caterina had become somewhat of 'The Best Friend' to almost everyone in the house. She had a presence about her that simply made you want to talk to her for hours, spilling your secret desires and laughing with her for days on end. I had began to hope that perhaps something would arise between Edward and herself, but even though they spent almost every waking minute with one another, they never became more than incredibly close siblings. Siblings and friends that relied on one another completely.

It was narcissistic to think so, but I began to believe that perhaps I **was** the only one who Edward could ever love. I wanted more than anything for him to love another, but he seemed content by the role within the family and he simply showed no interest in searching for something more.

With perfect punctuality, Edward came gliding down the marble railing, Rosalie in tow. He slid effortlessly from the handle bar and landed with perfect grace at the foot of the stairs, outstretching his arms and catching Rosalie bridal style in his arms.

He tutted his tongue disapprovingly and shook his head in mock remorse.

"Now, now Rosalie," He spoke softly, releasing Rose from his iron grip. "How many more times must we do this before you realize that you simply cannot beat me?!"

Rosalie huffed irritably and sauntered over towards where Emmett was standing, swinging her hair across her shoulders.

"You realize you could have just let me win," She quipped quickly, chucking Edward a stern look. "After all, it **is** Christmas… It might have been nice to show some chivalrous spirit."

He chuckled softly and meandered over towards the Caterina, inspecting the movie choice for the night.

He flipped through the films quickly, his face twisting into a more humorous expression with each movie title.

"Emmett!" He asked appallingly, handing the DVDs to Rosalie, "Did you get any movies that **aren't** children's Christmas movies?"

Emmett stared bashfully at the floor, tracing his toe around the marble in an adorable fashion.

"Sorry Mr. Cullen," He whined softly, "Did you want to pick which one?"

I laughed at Emmett's child-like nature and took the DVDs from Rose, eager to see the fine selection.

Home Alone. Beauty and the Beast, Christmas edition. The Polar Express. The Grinch. The Santa Claus one, two and three. The Night Before Christmas. Elf.

I burst out laughing and handed the movies to Jasper, this was going to be an entertaining Christmas.

"I think I'm going to have to go with Home Alone…" Edward said decisively, "It's a classic."

Emmett cheered quietly and extended a hi-five to Caterina, to which she happily slapped.

"I suppose we should get the torture over with then," Jasper mumbled, sighing softly. "Where are the others?"

"Carlisle, Esme, Eleazar and Carmen are already in the theatre," Rosalie said quietly, glancing briefly up the stairs. "I don't know where Alice and Michal are.."

"They'll catch up.." Edward said dismissively, brushing a hand over his bronze hair.

Edward had not changed too much over the course of a month. He grew more comfortable around Jasper and I, but if Edward and I were left alone in a room for too long, the atmosphere grew incredibly uncomfortable. I tried to talk to him a couple of times after the war, trying to explain mine and Jasper's relationship. But the furthest I ever got in his presence was; 'Jasper makes me happy..' Which I began to feel sounded obnoxious and cruel.

"Well, Let's start the movie then," Edward said decisively, watching as Caterina's face lit up at his words.

Emmett jumped excitedly at the foot of the stairs, eager to test out the newly renovated theatre. It was a project that Emmett had meticulously immersed himself in following the aftermath of the war. He'd changed in those couple of days. Not drastically, or even noticeably, but he was different. Just slightly dazed and out of focus. He'd wanted nothing more than to focus on a project that would keep both his hands and his mind busy and the result had been thoroughly pleasing. Emmett had torn down the wall between two existing rooms on the fourth floor, dedicating the entire back edge to shelf-units for DVDs. He'd then bought a dangerously large flat screen t.v and positioned it in front of rows and rows of plush couches.

Emmett started to bound up the stairs excitedly, grabbing Jasper and Edward with so that he could show of his fine handy work to some men who would appreciate it. Caterina and Rose laughed softly, following close behind.

I sat down at the base of the stairs and rested, silently wondering how it was that I had arrived at this point in my life. There had been so many times in my past where I had feared for the survival of my family, not to mention the survival of my sanity. So it seemed unusually fortunate that I had reached a destination in my life where I felt whole and complete, without fault.

It was as if I expected a monster to jump from the shadows, threatening my families lives at any moment.

I knew that it was partly due to my fear over the Volturi, my irrational apprehension of the ancient family and the deadly power they wielded. But as the days ticked by, they remained silent, still ignorant of our growing numbers.

Alice and Michal burst through the front door, giggling and looking slightly disheveled in appearance.

I raised a freshly plucked eyebrow at their exteriors, noticing the way their clothes hung shabbily, hastily thrown on.

Alice's emotions flushed with embarrassment as she noticed me, bowing her head in mortification.

"I was wondering where you two were," I said slowly, drawing out Alice's shame. "But now I can see that you were just having a bit ol' fun… post hunt."

Michal laughed cheerfully and threw Alice into his arms.

"Yes, yes.." He said frivolously, extending a hand out to me. "We're slaves to the passion. Has the movie started yet?"

I nodded quickly, "Yup. They're watching Home Alone."

"OOOhhhhhh!" Michal cooed in awe, increasing his pace in excitement. "I love that movie, why are you sitting here!?"

I shrugged disinterestedly, lowering my voice as we reached the home theatre.

"Just thinking over things… I can't believe you guys are getting married. I'm so excited…" I whispered elatedly, squeezing Michal's hand.

"Speaking of," Alice said joyously, hopping down from Michal's arms. "Michal has promised to design my wedding gown, and let me just say, I saw it in a vision and it is absolutely gorgeous."

I clapped excitedly, nudging open the theatre door and slipping into the darkness, aiming to seek out Jasper.

The movie hadn't progressed too far in, Macaulay Culkin had only just discovered that he'd been forgotten at home. I scoffed loudly under my breath, rolling my eyes. I had always found the concept of forgetting a child impossible, no matter how many children were in a family. I wasn't sure if it was my 'only child' tendencies poking through, but it seemed foolish for two parents to completely ignore one child to the point of abandonment.

I skulked through several rows of couches and blankets, finding it incredibly humorous that a family that couldn't sleep had so much linen. When I reached the end of the first row, I was swept into the arms of a strong and strapping god, pinning me beneath his weight and twisting his legs through mine. I muffled my laughter into the thick comforter and poked my head over the edge so that I could watch the movie.

Every so often, Jasper would distract me by running his hands over bare skin or kissing me tenderly over my neck, blowing on the moist skin. Mostly, I attempted to ignore him, but when I noticed that no one else other than Emmett was watching the movie, I began to give into Jasper's taunts, kissing him back just as distractingly.

'White Christmas' began to play softly over the film and I sat up eagerly to sing along, not having experienced one for myself in a few years.

I'd always disliked snow in my human years and I now chastised myself for having previously hated it. I craved the soft flakes now more than ever; the chance to roll in the icy powder and to dance in the shimmering flecks.

The movie rolled on and I took up my previous position in Jasper's lap. I watched as the end of the movie came around and I choked up, as I always did, when the son was reunited with his mother.

Jasper rocked me softly as I tightened my grip around his torso, holding back the foolish movie induced sobs. I'd seen the movie countless times, and yet, when ever the mother cried- I cried. Or at least, I would have were it possible.

I glanced briefly at Emmett as his face puckered into a sad smile, the family on the television poised in a banal group hug. I chuckled softly to myself and wondered vaguely how many times Emmett had seen the movie since it's release.

The credits rolled on to the screen and I stretched overdramatically, though my body had not cramped in the slightest. I jumped from the couch and skidded over to the windows, yanking open the blinds and letting the moonlight flood through the darkened room.

I stared into the night and it took a moment for my eyes to understand what lay ahead of me. A fine dust of white had covered the garden and the patio area outside, thrown delicately over the ground like fine icing sugar.

I yanked open the window roughly, throwing my head into the wind and closing my eyes as the white dust fell on my face. I opened my tongue and soft flakes stuck to my mouth, dissolving in the venom like ice in lava. The feeling was indescribable.

I sighed into the sky once more before dragging my face back in, smiling softly at my expectant family.

"It's snowing…" I said quietly, wiping a hand over the ice on my face.

Eleven separate audible gasps rang out through the room, followed by a deafening silence. Then, as if all had a timer implanted deep within their bodies, they jumped from their positions on the sofa's and ran their separate ways through the house. Some jumping straight from the windows, and others rushing hastily down the stairs, all in search of the snow.

I watched euphorically as my family fumbled in the snow, diving into sleet that couldn't be more than three centimeters deep and throwing it wildly in the air.

"You don't want to go?" Jasper asked curiously from behind me, staring past my shoulder out the small window.

I shook my head softly. I didn't, not anymore. What I had been craving was not the joy of playing in the flakes, or the fun of throwing dry ice around- And I knew that now as I stared gratifyingly at my exultant family.

I had experienced Christmas' before and I knew it was not the snow that I had craved in those moments, nor was it the absence of what one defined as 'fun'.

I had yearned then, for was what I possessed now; The sense of being whole. I had spent Christmas with Charlie and I had spent Christmas with Renee, but never had I spent Christmas with a complete family… a nuclear family.

And now I had so much more than that. I had brothers, sisters, friends, parents and a man who meant more to me than I did to myself.

I had found my family and I had found my peace.

I was home.

**I'm all teary now that it's over, it was quite a ride!**

**39093 Hits, 780 Reviews (so far lol), 51 chapters, 113 888 words, 100 favorites, 168 Alerts, 5 C2's… **

**WE MADE IT TO THE END PEOPLE!!**

**Thank you guys so much for reading. I loved reading all of your reviews and your support helped me so much in completing and updating this story.**

**You guy's were the best reviewers ever- That includes all you anonymous people too.**

**I hope you'll stick with me as I write other stories (They will all be BellaxJasper fics)**

**P.S I'm going to post a few different summaries for stories in one chapter that will be labeled ****Authors Note**** after this epilogue. I will post it later this week and then I would love it if you guys would review telling me which story you think I should continue with. **

**But keep in mind that I won't start the next story till I get back from my holiday, which means I won't be posting the next one for like… 6 weeks. Wow that's a long time! Haha, I only just figured that out. Okay, so maybe I will start the new story before that… we'll see.**

**Thanks guys, Love you all.**

**X o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o x o X**


	52. Author's Note: Please Read

**Author's Note:** Some of you may notice that this chapter was previously dedicated to several summaries of possible story ideas, but as I have long since chosen a story I decided I should take it down. I also wanted to give a thank you to all of the readers who still review this story even though it has been completed- Your support means a lot to me.

For those of you reviewing with things such as, "Can't wait for your next story"- Good News, I have a new story (and have for some time.) It's called Vida en Muerte and you can access the summary and the story itself from my account.

Once again, thank you for reading,

ecaniaga.


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